I'll Be Home For Christmas
by GCatsPjs
Summary: Some Christmas Cheer- Grey's Style. MerDer... Some of you may have already read it, but I decided to post it here.
1. Waiting Is The Hardest Part

**I'll Be Home For Christmas- **

This is a fic that I wrote last Christmas. It's completed, but I figured I would post it here little by little for all of you to enjoy.

Disclaimer- I own nothing... well, except for Adam and Emma... they're mine... all mine.

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Chapter 1- Waiting is the Hardest Part

The moment the announcement came over the speaker that all flights to the east had been cancelled, Derek knew that it was over for him. His evening, that is. He glanced to the screen as the words slipped across it that the reality had hit him. He watched as everyone around him groaned and shuffled away, his eyes flashing to the seat beside him for a moment, and then to his hand where he lifted his phone to look at the numbers on the screen.

He sighed as he pushed the only number he could think of at that moment, and he lifted his phone to his ear. "Mom?" He whispered into the line as he attempted to remain quiet.

"Derek." She whispered as she listened to his voice.

"Flight was cancelled." He said with a hoarse sounding voice, his travels had been long and seemingly unending. His eyes fell on the small blue blanket beside him, and the treasure tucked within it, his tiny hands curled around his most prized possession, the small plush bear that his mother had gotten him for Christmas before he was born. Derek closed his eyes as he thought of his son's words, the ones that pierced his heart each time the little boy pressed the toy to his nose. 'Smells like mommy.' He'd say in a tiny voice that never failed to bring tears to Derek's eyes.

"Derek." His mother said into the line, finally getting his attention.

"Hm…" He whispered, pretending that he had heard her say his name the six other times.

"Derek, what are you going to do?" She asked as she listened to his pause.

"I'll tell you when I know." He said into the line, pausing one more second. "I love you, Mom." He said softly before he closed his phone, lifted his head and again stared into the Christmas tree.

"Flight 234 to Boston has been cancelled." The loudspeaker in the airport screeched as a ring of disappointment and frustration rolled through the airport. Everyone who had been waiting for the flight stood up as they made their way toward the counter to book another flight, or try to find their way out of the airport some way. The last flight of the night was cancelled. She was stuck.

Meredith sit with her bag beside her, her foot hanging over the side of it as she listened to the resonating sound of the woman from the airline clicking the microphone back into place. She swallowed hard as she tried to control her frustration and her anger at the weather. She took a slow deep breath as she stared at the big red 'Cancelled' sign flash onto the screen. Her eyes moved slowly to the seat next to her, a sea of pink fleece and yellow puppies, wrapped around the most precious package that she could have imagined.

She looked at her daughter's sleeping eyes, the way they danced beneath her eyelids, the way her tiny pink lips fastened on to the thumb that had been firmly planted in her mouth. She couldn't rush to the counter, and she wasn't about to wake her daughter, finding herself in an aggravated limbo, sitting on an uncomfortable chair in an airport in the middle of nowhere.

She looked around the terminal; the numbers of people had diminished greatly as they had already disappeared to find their alternative plans. Meredith had no alternative plans, she had no money to find a hotel, and she had no family in the area. It was the day before Christmas eve, and she sit alone staring at the Christmas tree across the terminal wishing that there was some other way.

She wanted to cry. She wanted to scream. She wanted to get home. Her eyes scanned the seats and eventually they settled on the back of a man's head as he sit directly across from her, several rows of seats away. His back was to her and all she could see was the back of his head. He, like she… had not moved an inch since the announcement. His thick dark hair was mussed, and he looked like he had been traveling a lot that day. He just sat with his back to her not moving a muscle. She wondered what his story was about.

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Meredith stared at the Christmas tree for nearly an hour, the lights twinkling in the dull airport terminal. It was nearing midnight and nearly everyone had emptied the lone hallway. There was an airline person here and there, but not really anyone other than that. She stared at the Christmas tree until a person from the staff walked behind it and pulled the plug on the brightly colored tree, sending it into a state of dull limbo, just as she had turned into. She turned her head and once again was entranced by the head of the man in front of her. His head had lolled to the side slightly, and it was obvious that he had fallen asleep in his chair. Her attention was on the back of his thickly covered head, and her eyes moved slightly to the side again as her daughter moved within her blanket.

She reached her hand over and felt the soft cover of fleece covering her little girl, her thumb having slipped from her mouth as it lie open slightly. Meredith smiled slightly at the innocent look on the child's face, the slight smile at the corners of her lips as she dreamed tender dreams of happiness and fun, her voice moving through Meredith's head as she pictured that now stationary mouth of hers moving a mile a minute in anticipation for Christmas, for Santa, for happiness and for gifts. Her eyes moved down to the large bag beneath the seat, filled with gifts for the little girl. She had traded off her suitcase of warm clothes for the safety of the gifts that she now held in her carryon bag. Clothes she could replace, gifts were a luxury.

Her attention was then caught by movement across the terminal, across the several rows, but not by the man, the seat beside the man. He saw movement in the chair as the man continued to sit silently, obviously sleeping. "Oh…" She whispered to herself as she saw a bushy head of black hair poke up in the chair beside the man. The next thing she knew, two blue eyes were peeking from the top of the chair, looking directly at her. She didn't want to get his attention, the man she assumed to be his father had obviously mistakenly fallen asleep, and the last thing she wanted to do was send him in a panic because his son is not sitting beside him when he wakes up. In her thoughts though, she watched him turn his head, glancing at his father, he tipped his head to the side as he stared at his face. He didn't tap him or try to wake him, he only watched him for a moment. His eyes then flashed to the hallway, and back to his father. "Oh…" She whispered again as she shook her head, thinking as only a mother could, that the poor thing had to go to the bathroom and didn't know what to do.

She watched helplessly as the little boy stood up, sliding from his chair he couldn't have been any more than three or four, dancing back and forth on his feet as he stood staring at his father. He was whimpering, and the longer he stood there dancing back and forth, the more desperate he seemed to be becoming. Meredith glanced to the side of her, where there was someone from the airline talking to another person from the airline, their attention completely away from them as the little boy whimpered. She could hear him saying 'Daddy' in the tiniest voice as he hopped a little more. Meredith looked to the little girl beside her and glanced back to the little boy. She didn't want to be accused of trying to kidnap the poor thing, but his agony was becoming way too much for her. So she did the only thing she could think to do.

She pulled her shoe from her foot, and glanced over at the two airline people. They moved their way down the hallway together, so enthralled in their conversation that they didn't even notice as she raised her hand. She closed her eyes and shook her head as she tried to get herself to stop, but it was too late. The shoe left her fingertips and she cringed at the sound of it hitting something across the way. She looked down and pretended to tend to her daughter as she swore at herself for her stupidity. "Idiot… stupid, stupid… stupid… stupid, idiot…" She mumbled to herself as she started to root through her purse, pretending she was looking for something, she glanced up and saw the man standing up, his hand on his head, rubbing his thick dark hair as the little boy danced around and pulled his father's hand toward the bathroom. With a quick look, his eyes flashed to Meredith as she looked back down into her purse, and when she looked back up, the man and child were gone and she stood up for a moment.

"Crap." She whispered to herself as she realized her shoe was gone too.

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Meredith closed her eyes and tried to figure out what to do. She was now alone in the terminal, her daughter sleeping soundly beside her, but she was down a shoe. She sat in her seat, wiggling her now bare toes she shook her head and rubbed her forehead for a long time, mumbling to herself as she sat in her seat sighing angrily. "I swear to God, Meredith… that has to have been the stupidest thing you have ever done in your entire life." She mumbled to herself as she swallowed, the vision of the shoe flying from her fingertips played over and over again in her mind. "Now look where you are… sitting in an airport… alone… with one shoe… idiot… stupid, stupid idiot…" She mumbled as she rubbed her hand over her face, opening them slowly, her eyes widened at the sight of her shoe being dangled in front of her face. She reached up to grab it, only to have it swung out of her reach. "Hey!" She exclaimed as she turned around, only to see the man who had once been sitting across from her smirking mischievously as he held her shoe in his hand.

"You know." He said. "In some cultures… you pull a stunt like that… and it's considered a marriage proposal." He said as he held the little boy's hand as he looked up at his father with a matching grin.

"Huh?" Meredith swallowed as she glanced to the little boy and Derek let go of his hand and grabbed his bag, rolling it around the front of the seat, he held fast to her shoe as the little boy followed his father. He wore a dark blue hoodie, his black hair sticking in all directions, his crystal blue eyes matching his father's, filled with sleepiness as the man set his suitcase to the side and smirked at the woman. "Are you going to give me my shoe back?" She asked as Derek shook his head.

"My shoe… this is my shoe…"

"Finder's keepers." The little boy nodded as he looked up at his father.

"Is this what you're trying to teach your son?" She asked with a confused glare, reaching out for her shoe.

"Oh, he's not my son…"

"I'm a monkey." The little boy said with a smirk.

"He's a monkey… he's a trained monkey named…. Um…"

"Raphael!" he exclaimed.

"That's a turtle." Derek replied.

"Oh. Um… Joe."

"He's a trained monkey named Joe… and this is my shoe." Derek smirked.

"I'm not amused, sir." She said as she reached for her shoe, only to have it pulled from her reach.

"No… I am amused…" Derek said as he watched his little boy for a moment as he leaned against Derek's leg. "See… we appreciate you waking me up to take Joe here to the bathroom."

"I reaaaally had to pee…" The little boy said with a little skip.

"He did… you would be proud… well, maybe not you… but… someone out there is holding a pee contest, and they would be proud… but anyway… and I thank you for getting my attention… because it could have been very messy…"

"Very, very messy…" The little boy shook his head as Meredith couldn't help but laugh a little.

"And you know… the shoe thing… great idea in concept…"

"Really… great idea…" The little boy nodded his head as he giggled.

"But in reality… seriously… that heel hurts…"

"That's what he says… he says it hurts." The little boy shook his head.

"Do you two always finish one another's sentences?" Meredith giggled as Derek shook his head and the little boy nodded his, Derek reached down and tapped the boy slightly and he shook his head too as he started to giggle.

"I didn't say he was a very well trained monkey…" Derek joked as Meredith giggled. "Anyway… So we were in the restroom talking… and we had to give you a name, because you know… there was this incident… that caused some pain…"

"You threw a shoe at him!" The little boy exclaimed.

"She did…" Derek nodded. "Well… I wanted to call you 'Miss hurl a shoe' and he wanted to call you 'Miss lets him pee' but… we talked for another minute and thought it'd be best if we just came over… and handed you your shoe and wished you a Merry Christmas."

"But first." The little boy giggled. "I'm Adam…" he said as he held his hand out to Meredith. Meredith looked up at Derek for a moment with a humored look as Derek shrugged.

"He's Adam." Derek nodded as Meredith reached for his hand and shook it gently.

"That's my dad… I call him daddy… big people call him Doc." He said with a smirk.

Derek went to reach his hand to Meredith as she extended her hand to shake his. Instead of his hand, however, Derek placed her shoe within her grip. She raised her eyes to his and watched a slow smile extend over his lips. "Thanks for the wakeup call." He said as he watched her nod as she took the shoe from his hand.

"I'm Meredith." She said with a soft smile to father and son as she held her shoe in her hand for a moment and watched Derek stand awkwardly for a moment.

"Well, Meredith…" Derek said as he nodded to the sleeping little girl. "And Mini-Meredith…" He said softly as his eyes softened at the sight of the sleeping girl. "We'll let you rest…" he said as he nodded toward the seats.

"Wait…" Meredith said as she reached for his hand, not thinking about what she was doing until she had his warm hand in hers. "I'm sorry…" she mumbled as she released it and looked up into his eyes as he tilted his head slightly. "Sit…" She said as she nodded toward the seat beside her, and the seat beside that. "Sit and talk… Doc…" She said as Derek smirked.

"Derek." He said with a sad smile.

"Sit and talk, Derek." She shrugged as she looked to the little boy. "Adam…" She shrugged as the little boy looked up at his father and tugged his arm.

He glanced to Meredith and smiled. "Excuse us, Ma'am." He said softly as Derek gave him a confused look for a second as he followed his son's tugging arm. He followed the little boy and crouched down as the little boy whispered to his father, his eyes flashing to Meredith as she dropped her shoe to the floor and slipped her foot into it. Derek chuckled as he laughed and shook his head, lifting his boy into his arms, he whispered back, he walked back toward Meredith.

He sat down beside her and pulled the little boy into his arms as he tipped his head onto his father's shoulder. Meredith turned her head and glanced to Derek as he smirked at her from the seat right beside her. "What did he say?" Meredith whispered.

"He said we should sit next to you." Derek said as he smirked back at her, watching a humored confusion wash over her face. "He said… that way you won't have too far to throw your shoe." Derek said as he let out a hearty laugh, as Meredith couldn't help but giggle. The first time she had laughed like that in months, and it felt good.

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Adam's head rested on Derek's shoulder as he breathed softly, his eyes remaining on the woman sitting beside them as he curled his arms beneath his chest and cuddled into Derek. "You have a very beautiful little boy." Meredith said politely, watching Adam's crystal blue eyes light up at the mention of him.

"Thank you." Derek said with a soft nod as he gave her a sly grin. "People say he looks a lot like me… I think I'll take that as a compliment myself." He said as Meredith looked away and giggled. Her eyes flashed to his as she watched the mischievous glint within them.

"I don't think that's fair… I should be able to compliment both of you at the same time, without you taking credit for Adam's intended compliment."

"He gets that he's cute." Derek nodded. "Me… I don't get that much anymore… so he generally hands off those compliments to me." He said as he listened to her soft giggle. "Your little angel there looks quite comfortable in that chair…" Derek said as he watched the little girl as she slept curled in a tight ball in the seat beside Meredith. Her cheeks were bright red, her lips a dark pink as she suckled her thumb a little harder in her dream.

"Thank you." Meredith said softly. "She's had a very long day." Meredith said as she reached her hand down and touched the little girl's golden locks, a bit of perspiration beside her ear had soaked some of the strands as Derek admired the child with Meredith. "She has a little cold…" Meredith said softly as the tiny girl shifted in her sleep a little, groaning, her thumb lifting from her mouth as she let out a forceful hollow cough, she shifted as she coughed a little harder, trying to catch her breath. She opened her eyes as she finally stopped coughing as she grimaced. Her blue-grey eyes staring up at her mother as she whimpered.

"Mama…" She whimpered softly as she coughed a little more. Meredith reached for her and lifted her from her chair, feeling the heat radiating from her body as she coughed, Meredith held her tightly against her. "Mama… I'm cold…"

"I know, sweetie…" Meredith whispered as she felt her daughter's forehead and looked into her eyes, she could see that they were watery and sad, as she noticed that the man beside her mother was watching her closely. She turned her head and pressed it into her mother, facing away from Derek.

"It sounds like a little more than a cold…" Derek said with a concerned look, he watched as Meredith moved away slightly from him as she rocked her little girl.

"It's just a little cold…" She said softly as she kissed her daughter's head and rocked her as she leaned back on the seat, watching Derek as he resisted the urge to switch into doctor mode, even though his parent mode wasn't any less nosy.

"She has a fever… I'm taking her to the doctors when I get to Boston…" She said softly as she watched Derek. She half expected him to stand up and take his son as far away from them as possible, and was quite surprised when he didn't. Instead, he furrowed his brow and repositioned his son slightly.

"May I?" He asked as he reached his hand across to her daughter, he waited for Meredith to nod, and he placed his cool fingertips on her cheek. "She is burning up pretty badly…" Derek said softly.

"I've been trying to keep her hydrated… keep her resting… until I get to Boston…" Meredith whispered. "I just… have to get to Boston." She said as she trailed off slightly as Derek moved his hand from the little girl. While moving his hand away, he paused to touch Meredith's cheek. "You're feeling warm too…" He whispered as she turned her head out of his reach, she shook her head.

"I'm fine." She said as Derek nodded. He didn't want to upset her, but he was showing that he was genuinely concerned.

"Alright…" he said as he gave her a kind smile. "I think I've invaded your personal space enough for one day." He said as she couldn't help but smile at his kindness. She thought for a moment as she realized what had happened. She had allowed this stranger to touch her child's cheek without a second thought, and for a split second, she felt panicked. She had let her guard down, and her jaw clenched with the thought. Her eyes drifted from the stranger as she cuddled her daughter tighter, hearing her groan slightly from the movement, she kissed her head. "Hey…" Derek said softly as he tried to get her attention without jarring her from her reverie. Her head turned slowly as their eyes met once more. "Are you visiting family in Boston?" He asked as he watched her stare at him blankly for a moment.

She hadn't fully recognized his question as it slipped from his lips, it took her just a second. "Huh?" She asked as she shook her head, pushing the fog from her mind as she focused on the man beside her.

"For Christmas…" He said as he finished his sentence. "Are you visiting family in Boston for Christmas?"

"Um… oh… yeah, I'm visiting my mother." Meredith said, swallowing hard as she watched him scrutinizing her answer.

He immediately felt guilty for asking her the question, rationalizing that she was probably just tired, but she was seemingly giving off a conflicting vibe of 'please talk to me', and 'leave me alone creep.' He smirked a little as he tilted his head. "We don't have to talk if you don't want to…" He said softly, watching her eyes move to his for a moment of pause.

"No…" She said as she shook her head and gave him a kind smile. "No… it's alright… I'm just… I don't… typically, I don't talk a lot about myself." She said as she felt her daughter push into her a little more. "Why don't you tell me a little about you…?" She said with a smile. "Tell me why two handsome young men are traveling across the country all alone…" She said, her smile becoming a little wider as Derek's smile slipped onto his lips.

"Ah… flattery…" He said as he listened to her giggle. "So you want to hear our story, huh?"

"I do." She said as she nodded.

"Alright…" He said with a smile as he watched her attention on him become slightly more apparent as she shifted in her seat and watched him. Adam closed his eyes against his father's chest, and Derek took a slow deep breath. "Well…" He said as he glanced toward the darkened Christmas tree across the hall. "I'm Derek Shepherd… I'm a surgeon." He said as he nodded toward Meredith, whose eyebrows raised, and she smiled a little. "I… grew up in New York… and moved to Seattle about a year ago… I married my high school sweetheart…" He said as his eyes drifted again. "We married after… um… after I got out of medical school… to make sure I finished, you know?" He said with a slight chuckle.

"What is her name?" Meredith whispered as she realized how inappropriate her question was, and that she was interrupting his story. "I'm sorry…" She said as she smiled and shook her head. "I'm bad at having stories told to me…" She giggled.

"No…" He said softly. "It's fine. Her name was Anna." He said softly. He watched her eyebrows raise again, as if she wanted to ask a question. "Yes… was…" He said with a sad chuckle. "She… was diagnosed with lung cancer… about five years ago… and she fought it… and was in remission… when she became pregnant with Adam." He said softly as he swallowed hard.

"Oh, Derek…" She said softly as she touched the stranger's arm as he told his story.

"No… it's alright…" He said through misty eyes. "I mean… it has taken a lot of therapy… but I can get through the story…" He said with a slight chuckle as Meredith could feel her own eyes misting up. "She um… she was about two months pregnant… when she found out the cancer was back… with a vengeance." He said softly. "Um… she had an option of… terminating… and undergoing treatment." He said as he swallowed hard. "But… she said… she told me that… she knew that she wouldn't be around forever… especially if the cancer kept coming back stronger than before." He whispered. "And she came to the decision… to go as long as she could… because she wanted there to be someone there for me… someone who was a part of her, and me... and um… She gave birth to Adam nearly six months later…" He whispered. "And died… a week before he was able to leave the hospital." He said as he took a deep breath.

"Oh my goodness…" Meredith said softly as she shook her head, tears rolling down her cheeks as she covered her mouth with her hand. "Oh that is just…"

"It's a miracle." Derek said softly as he rubbed his son's back and raised his hand to wipe his tear. "That's all I can say about it…he's my miracle..." He said as he shrugged, trying to remain strong. "So… it's always been him and me… traveling… me working… About a year ago I got a job out in Seattle… and I packed up and moved out there." He said as he took a deep breath and released it slowly. "So… my mom was pretty upset when I took Adam and moved clear across the country… but it's a terrific job… and Adam has a lot of friends out there… we're on our way to my sister's place in Boston for Christmas eve… and then we were going to drive over to my mom's place in the evening and stay there for Christmas morning… we do that every year… Mom hasn't seen Adam for a while, so it's a treat for her." He said as he nodded his head and smiled. He watched Meredith as she tried to keep her composure during his story, his eyes implored her as he tilted his head forward a little. "How about you… what's your story?" He asked with a polite smile as Meredith shrugged.

"Um…" Meredith said softly. "There's not much there…" She said softly. "I was married also…" She nodded her head. "Up to… about three or four months ago… living here and there… my husband was a computer programmer, so we've lived pretty much everywhere…" She said as she watched Derek's eyes while she spoke, his light blue windows letting her in completely. She paused for a second. "He… um… about four months ago, Rick was in a car accident…" She said as Derek tilted his head and listened more intently. "He um… he went into a coma… and I had to um… make the decision to pull him from life support." She said as she swallowed.

"It's a very difficult thing to do." Derek nodded as she gave him a sad smile as she nodded in agreement.

"His family wasn't very… understanding of it all… and I had to spend all of my money on his funeral expenses and bills… mortgage… Last month it all kind of came to a head… you know, it came to be too much… everything reminded me of him, so I just got out of there. I sold the house and the car, and packed up myself and Emma… and decided to go home." She shrugged.

"Tough decisions to make." Derek said softly as he nodded his head. "Going from completely independent to dependent is not an easy task." He replied.

"No…" She said softly as she shifted the little girl in her arms. She stared at the floor for a moment as she suddenly felt his hand resting delicately on her shoulder. She turned her head slowly as he gave her a supportive smile.

"I'm sorry for your loss." He said as he chewed on his lower lip slightly, his eyes sending her his sincere sympathy even clearer than his voice.

"I'm sorry for your loss…" She said as she tried her best to convey the same message to him that he had given to her. Derek read her thoughts and sympathies loud and clear as he watched her move her eyes back to the floor. She stared at the boring design in the floor for a very long time, a soft, delicate silence floating between them as he watched her shake her head just slightly, as if she were unsure of the risks she had taken by telling this stranger her situation. And he didn't know why, and he had no idea what she was thinking, but when the stranger beside him tilted her head just slightly in his direction, his arm moved to embrace her around her shoulder, and her head tipped to the side, resting on his shoulder, and before he could move an inch, she had closed her eyes against him, and drifted off.

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Meredith moved slightly in her sleep, a soft sigh escaping her lips as she moved her arms slightly. She felt cold as she pulled her daughter farther into her and pushed herself farther into the shoulder of the person against her, an arm extending around her body as she cuddled into the arm, her nose pressing into the person's chest as she suddenly realized amidst her exhausted state that she was pushing herself into a stranger. She stopped as she felt her heart begin to race, her cheeks burning in embarrassment as she tried to work through her exhausted mind a way to get out of his arms without embarrassing herself any farther.

She weighed her options. She could move casually and sit up, pretending that she had intended on cuddling the stranger beside her, which would be completely against everything she had worked so hard to build against. She could stand up and walk away, leaving him sitting confused and alone, walk away and try to avoid him in the empty airport until she could just get to Boston and get on with everything without ever seeing this man again. She could… Just as she was trying to finish her thought, she felt his hand move slightly along her arm, and felt a soft, gentle sigh move through his body. She suddenly felt very warm against him, her face burning, her toes tingling, and she realized that his arm was around her. She tried to remember when he had put his arm there, because she had obviously not pushed her way into his arms, he had done it out of his own accord, he had made that move, not her, it was him that was being… kind.

Derek could feel Meredith stiffen in his arms, his eyes flashing to the clock on the screen. It was nearly four o'clock in the morning and he had sat with one arm securely around his son, and his other around this exhausted stranger that he couldn't help but feel connected to. He could feel her fever radiating through her clothes, warming his skin, he could feel her pushing herself into him over the past four hours, his eyes remaining open, his thoughts in a million different places as he stood guard over the young woman and her child as he let them both sleep. He had felt her stiffen in his arms, and he realized that she must have woken, realizing that she was in the arms of a stranger, he figured she had no idea what to do next.

He sighed a very soft, slow sigh, moving his hand across her arm, he tried to comfort her into relaxing again, only to feel her stiffen a little more. He stopped moving his hand and swallowed hard as he stared across at the Christmas tree across the hallway. "Hey." He whispered, his voice was full of a sleepy grumble, but there was a level of kindness that made his cheeks warm. He could feel the heat of her body pressing into his, her fever was evident, but she hadn't shown signs of feeling it. She moved slightly, her lips parting as she gave a resistant groan of achiness. "Hey…" He whispered again as he rubbed her arm slightly, trying to get her to sit up. "Meredith?" He whispered, her name falling from his lips delicately like a newly fallen snow, flittering through the air with no end in sight, until it drifted into her ears and sent a chill through her fever ravaged body. "Meredith…" He whispered again as she finally lifted her head, her eyes were red and tired, the rings beneath her eyes were dark and sad, her pale complexion looked even more pale against the bright redness in her cheeks. "You look really sick…" He shook his head as he swallowed, watching as she pulled away from his arm and stared into his eyes for a moment. She looked like she was somewhere between crying her eyes out, and picking up and running away from him. "Are you alright?" He whispered as she nodded her head and bit the corner of her lip. She turned her head toward the chair beside her and then to Derek as he lifted his arm from around her.

She swallowed hard as she stared at her bags for a moment, and then glanced to the chair beside her. She lifted her head and looked at Derek, very obviously weighing her options. She pulled her daughter into a cradling position, depositing her tiny body into the chair beside her, she turned her back to Derek as she pulled the little girl's fleece blanket around her tighter, running her fingers through the little girl's golden hair as she leaned down and kissed her forehead, watching as the little girl didn't even move in her sleep, only opened her mouth a little wider so that she could breathe through it loudly, a low snore sliding from her tiny body, sounding so foreign and loud.

"Let me get her a cool cloth." Derek said as he moved slightly. He stood up as he watched Meredith tend over the little girl. Her eyes lifted to his as she looked at him desperately, but at the same time her eyes told him not to leave her. "I'll be right back…" He whispered as he repositioned his son in his arms. "Can you watch my bags?" He asked as she gave him a confused look at first, and then nodded gently at him. "I'll be right back." He whispered as he gripped Adam tightly and took a step away. He glanced to her for a moment, and stepped forward. In one quick movement, he crouched down and grabbed her shoe from her foot. She squeaked as a chill ran up her body at the surprise of his movement, and she couldn't help but let a small smirk rise on her lips as she watched him give her a faux suspicious look. "Collateral." He said with a wink as she let her mouth drop slightly, watching as he turned sharply and made his way to the men's room while holding his son in his arms.

Meredith touched her daughter's head and ran her fingers through her hair. "Oh, baby…" She whispered as the little girl moved against her mother's hand. "I am so sorry…" She whispered. "I'm so sorry that you're sick, little one… I'm so sorry…" She swallowed hard as she felt the soreness of her own throat sting, her hand raising to touch her forehead, she could feel the sweat against her skin. "When we get to Boston baby… we'll take care of you… we'll get you all better…" She whispered as a shadow appeared at her side. She looked up and before she even saw his face, he was crouched down beside her, Adam's arms wrapped around his neck as the little boy slept soundly as his father cradled his tiny body carefully with one arm, leaving his other arm free to hand Meredith the cloth.

"One cool cloth… as ordered…" He said softly as Meredith gave him a grateful smile. "Okay… not ordered…" he whispered as he looked to Meredith before he touched the little girl's forehead. She glanced to him and he gave her a worried look as she handed him the cloth. "It doesn't feel too high…" He whispered. "But you're going to have to get her to a doctor soon… you're going to need one too…" He whispered as she nodded. He took the cool, wet paper towel and very gently placed it on the little girl's forehead, and watched as she shifted in her sleep slightly. "Poor little thing…" He whispered in a tender voice as Meredith touched her little fingers as she shifted in her sleep.

"She's all I have." Meredith whispered, mostly to herself as she ran her hand down the little girl's face gently, and leaned in to kiss her softly. "I love you, baby…" She whispered as she felt Derek stand up beside her, and move away as he walked to the seats beside their bags. She could see out of the corner of her eye how gently he placed his son in the chair, watching as the little boy curled into a ball on the seat.

"Look at that… you fit perfectly…" Derek said in a funny whispering voice as Meredith giggled a little and wiped a tear from her eye as she watched him glance to her with a humored smirk. She watched as he pulled a blanket from atop his bag and covered the little boy with it, leaning down to kiss his cheek, he stood up and raised his arms above his head in a big stretch, yawning as he rubbed his eyes. He noticed after a moment, that Meredith was watching him, and he turned on his heel. "I have an idea." He said as he reached his hand to her. "Hand me your other shoe…" He said as she furrowed her brow.

"You already have one…" She said as she shook her head.

"I know, I know… hand me the other one…" He said as she shook her head. "Oh, come on… trust me." He said as he bounced on his heels a little, reminding her of a little kid who was impatient for something, she giggled.

"Fine…" She said as she pulled her other shoe off, leaving her feet clad only in stockings as he put the shoes in his back pocket and walked away. "Hey… where are you going?" She asked as she realized that her other shoe was in his other back pocket.

"I didn't want you to throw the other one at me." He teased as he walked across the hallway. She laughed and shook her head as she turned and sat down. She looked up and watched as Derek lifted the Christmas tree from across the hallway off the ground.

"Derek?" She asked as he just smirked at her, looking up and down the hallway, he walked across toward her. "Derek, what are you doing?" She asked as she looked down at Emma and then back up at Derek.

"I told you… I have an idea…" He said as he winked at her.

"You're going to get in trouble…" She said as she watched him drag the Christmas tree past her, depositing it about ten feet away, by the wall. He grabbed the cord and pulled it to an available outlet. He grinned like a little boy as he put the plug in the outlet and the lights on the tree lit up his smile ten times more than it already was.

"I'm not going to get in trouble…" He said as he grinned as he turned and looked to Meredith. "Hey… hand me that bag over there…" He said as he pointed to the large duffel bag beside the carryon.

"This one?" She asked as she pointed to it. He nodded and she lifted it from the ground, carrying it to him, she stood beside him as he took it from her, thanking her. She glanced to the kids and to the hallway, and then glanced to Derek, who was unzipping the bag as he knelt beside the tree. "What are you doing?" She asked, a slight giggle in her voice as she watched him pull something from the bag.

"We're going to have Christmas, goddamn it." he whispered as she gave him an odd look. "Gifts… I'm going to get the gifts out…" he said as he looked up at her and pulled another gift from the bag.

She gave him a strange look at first and he was about to give up and put the tree back, when suddenly her face lit up. "Seriously?" She asked.

"Seriously…" He nodded. "Do you have anything for the princess?" He asked as Meredith nodded excitedly. "Well go get it… we don't want Adam to be the only lucky kid to have an airport Christmas." He said jokingly as Meredith laughed and ran toward her bags, the achiness and feverish feeling pushed away, as her Christmas spirit began to come alive.

Meredith rushed over with her bag and Derek helped her empty the presents beneath the tree, until the underside of it was filled with wrapped packages. "We're going to get into so much trouble…" Meredith shook her head as she glanced at the children one more time, before looking to Derek. She watched as the Christmas lights glittered in his crystal blue eyes, the way even his sadness was now overtaken by a strong gust of happiness for the season, for giving, for thankfulness.

The thought of the look on his son's face when he wakes up and sees those gifts beneath the tree made all the difference in the world. All of his sadness had been swept away, his sorrow gone. The woman beside him had awakened something deep within him that he probably never would have thought of otherwise, and the worst Christmas ever, was quickly transforming into something different, something better, something bigger. He glanced to the young woman beside him as her eyes sparkled in the lights, her smile was sad, but still triumphant as she shook her head in wonderment. He smirked as he turned his head. "One more thing." He said as she gave him a confused glance. "The finishing touch." He said as he gave her a devilish grin. He reached behind him and pulled out one of her shoes from his pocket, and before she could argue, he had lifted it high above her head and placed it firmly atop the tree.

"Derek!" She exclaimed with a giggle that warmed him from head to toe.

"What?" He asked as he shrugged and laughed with her for a moment as she shook her head in faux disapproval. "I think it's perfect." He said with a laugh as he looked at her shoe atop the tree, and glanced to the children who lay sleeping soundly.

Meredith's eyes traveled to the children as well as she then turned her head to Derek and smiled. "It is…" She whispered. "It is perfect." She said as she swallowed, turning swiftly, before she could stop herself, she wrapped her arms around the stranger, and he wrapped his around her, as she buried her head in his chest and began to cry.

-------------

Derek held the crying strangers in his arms for several moments, his hands gently running circles in her back as he moved his head down to let his nose rest gently among her golden locks as she trembled in his arms. He whispered that everything was alright, that she could cry if she needed to, when suddenly she pushed her hands into his chest and stomped off toward the chair where her daughter lay sleeping. She was still crying as she reached the chair, sitting down, she continued to cry.

"Meredith?" Derek whispered as he stood by the tree for a moment longer before reaching up to grab her shoe from the top, he pulled the other shoe from his back pocket and walked to her. She sat in her chair, her face in her hands as she continued to cry, refusing to look at him. As he approached her, he knelt down before her, his eyes lifting to her slumped and trembling form as he avoided touching her lightly as he wanted to, just to soothe her. "Meredith…?" He whispered as he watched her ignore him, his eyes moved to her socked feet as she pulled herself tightly into the chair, her eyes covered by her hands.

He reached out tenderly for her foot, feeling a bit of resistance, he thought she may have the energy to kick him in the face, but after a moment she released her strength and allowed him to pull her foot lightly to him as he slipped her shoe onto it. He listened carefully, her sobs were lightening a bit as he reached for her other foot. "Meredith?" He whispered, letting her know that he was still there, that he was trying to be supportive, even if he had no idea what her story was completely. He felt connected to her in some way, and he could tell that she was hurting, he knew her pain. "Meredith…" He whispered as he touched her other foot. His hand cupped her heel lightly as she continued to cry into her hands. "Meredith… look at me for a second…" He said softly as he held her foot cradled in his hand. He watched as her eyes peeked from between her fingers and he smirked at her as he held her shoe in his hand. Her sobs had turned to hiccups, and their eyes locked for a moment. "Cinderella…" He said with a tilt of his head as he smirked and slipped her shoe onto her foot. "I'm sorry that I stole your shoe." He whispered as her hands moved down her face, and she watched the hopeful look in his eyes. "Do you want to call it even?" He asked as she swallowed hard and closed her eyes tightly for a moment. "Meredith?" He whispered.

"I…" She stammered in a high, sad voice. "I'm sorry that I… I…"

"Hey…" he said as he tilted his head and smirked. "I am just teasing…" He shook his head, knowing that she was in a delicate place with her emotions. "I shouldn't tease… but I do it… it's in my nature…" he winked as she gave him a sad smile. "Are you alright?" He whispered as she glanced to her daughter and sighed slowly.

"We're fine." She whispered as Derek shook his head.

"I didn't ask if you were fine… I mean, I'm fine… and I'm alright… but there was a time when I was fine and I wasn't alright… talk to me." He said as he sat in the chair beside her.

"I don't know you." She whispered as she rubbed the soft fleece of her daughter's blanket between her fingertips. "I don't know you, Derek. It wouldn't be appropriate for me to talk to you about this." She whispered.

Derek remained silent at her words, unsure of how to reassure her that a conversation between them could be healthy and help them through their problems and worries. He continued to kneel before her as she turned her head and stared directly into his eyes. Their eyes locked in a thought filled cloud as he swallowed hard and dared her beautiful eyes to light up. His eyes were bright and full of hope, and she wished for a moment that she could have that hope within her soul. She wanted to talk to this man. For some reason, his eyes made her want to tell him everything she had ever thought or felt in her entire life. She tried to push that thought aside, blaming it on the fact that she hadn't had anyone to talk to that wasn't her daughter for a very long time. Derek took a slow, deep breath. "May I hold your hand, then?" he whispered.

"Derek…"

"Sometimes it makes us feel better… to hold someone's hand… anyone's hand…" He said with a swallow. "You see it in the hospital all the time… patient's holding a doctor's hand, a nurse's hand… they don't know them… but it makes them feel better." He shrugged.

"Are you saying that I need a doctor, Derek?" She asked, a hint of mischief in her eyes as she watched him shake his head.

"No…" he shrugged. "But I do think that you need a friend." He said softly.

"So you want to be my friend?" She asked.

"If you didn't mind having a shoe stealing neurosurgeon single father with a tendency to make really lame jokes that half the time don't make any sense." Derek shrugged. "As a friend."

"You mean as opposed to having a neurotic, crying, whiney single mother, shoe throwing medical student with no money, no direction, and no family… as a friend?" Meredith asked.

"I don't think I could do much better than that…" Derek replied with a smirk.

"Oh, I think you could do a lot better than that…" Meredith said with a slight giggle.

"I wouldn't want to try." Derek said as he held his hand to hers. "May I hold your hand?" He whispered. "As a friend."

"As a friend?" She whispered.

"Of course." Derek said, as he reached his hand a little farther, and she met him halfway, reaching her hand to his, they met and gripped tightly to one another, as their eyes locked in a sleepy, intense stare that both were too afraid would disappear if they looked away.

------------

Meredith and Derek sat together on the chairs in the terminal, silent and seemingly content as there was the start of some action around them. Airport staff and some other customers were now milling about, and Derek glanced to his companion as she sit with her head crooked on his shoulder, her eyes closed in a gentle slumber. He saw movement from the other side of her and tilted his head forward to see the little girl moving around.

She sat up in the chair, her blonde locks messy and matted as she lifted herself up slightly. "Mama?" She whispered, noticing that Meredith had fallen asleep, her eyes passed to the stranger beside her mother, and she hid her face when she realized he was watching her.

"Oh…" Derek said softly to the little girl. "Don't be frightened, Emma." Derek said, remembering the little girl's name from her mother's conversation. He watched as the little girl's eyes peeked out from around her mother, cautious as she watched him. "I'm Derek…" He whispered with a gentle smile as he tried to gauge her anxiety. He could see from her eyes that she was sick, and tired. He could see fear and uncertainty within her eyes as well. She sat back suddenly, and let out a loud bark of a cough, her hands moving to her mouth as the cough seemed to push her against the seat as the hollow sound filled the airport. "Are you alright, sweetheart?" Derek said softly as she looked up at him with a pained expression, her lips smacking slightly.

"My froat hurts…" She whimpered in a sad, soft voice that nearly broke Derek's heart.

"Your throat hurts?" Derek asked as the little girl shook her head. "Do you want something to drink, sweetheart?" He asked, watching her nod her head as she glanced to her mother and back to Derek. "Here…" He said softly. "You stay right there, and I'm going to run over to that machine over there and get you some water." He said softly as he nodded toward the vending machine. He very gently moved, tipping Meredith's head slightly so that she was still sitting upright as he carefully stood up. The little girl sat cross legged in her seat as he held his finger to his lips as to indicate not to wake up Meredith.

He tiptoed slightly, watching the little girl as she let out a giggle. He smiled as he stepped across the hallway to the vending machine and pulled out his wallet. He started to put money in the machine, not paying attention to across the hallway, when suddenly he heard a little girl's voice.

"OH MY GOSH! Mommy! You have to wake up!" Emma exclaimed. Derek turned his head to see the little girl shaking her mother.

"Oh… no…" Derek said with a slight laugh to himself, only because he knew what the commotion was about. He watched as Meredith sat up straight, grabbing her daughter's arm lightly as if to keep her from disappearing. She stared into her eyes as the little girl pointed toward the tree and bounced a little, her sickness was wearing her down, but the sight of the Christmas gifts under the tree lifted her spirits tremendously.

"Mommy! Santa came! Look!" The little girl exclaimed as she pointed and hopped. "Santa came!"

Meredith's eyes moved to the tree and she acted surprised as she looked to the tree, only making the little girl hop on her heels a little more. He watched as Meredith suddenly started to look around, her eyes darting this way and that as they moved in his direction as he stood at the vending machine holding the bottle of water that he had just purchased. He lifted his hand and waved a little, as she lifted hers and waved back, her fingertips waggling slightly as she looked away, back to her daughter.

"Can we go open presents? Can we go open presents?" She asked as she hopped about and smiled.

"It looks like someone has a little more energy…" Derek's voice interrupted them slightly as the little girl went quiet and looked up at him curiously again.

He crouched down to her level and smiled. "Emma…" Meredith whispered as the little girl's eyes went to Meredith. "This is…"

"That's Derek." Emma said as she smiled slightly at him.

Meredith looked over at him with a confused expression as he handed her the bottle of water from the vending machine. "We're old friends." Derek said with a nod as the little girl smiled slightly and handed the bottle back to Derek, who twisted the cap and handed it back to her. She held it with two hands as she sipped from it. He looked up when he saw movement in the other chair, and smiled slightly. "It looks like someone else is ready for Christmas." Derek said with a smirk as he watched his son's head pop up, his dark locks messy and sticking up, his bright blue eyes darting to his father as he looked at him sleepily.

"I didn't go anywhere, bud." Derek said as the little boy gave his father a sleepy smile. "Emma…" Derek said as the little girl looked up at him. "That's Adam."

The little girl turned her head toward the little boy as he waved with a little smile. "Hi Adam." The little girl whispered as she started to cough again, her hand gripping her mother's sleeve as she tried to catch her breath.

Derek watched for a moment, as his son's eyes finally made their way to the Christmas tree, and he nearly leaped from his chair. "Awesome!" he exclaimed as he jumped to the ground. "Daddy, look!" He exclaimed.

"What?" Derek asked, feigning confusion as the little boy ran toward the tree.

"Santa came! He came to the airport, Daddy! You said he'd wait to get to grandma's house, and he came here! You were wrong, daddy! You were so wrong!" The little boy exclaimed happily as Derek looked to Meredith as she giggled.

"What are you giggling at?" Derek teased as she giggled a little more. "Oh… you're just reveling in the 'daddy being wrong' thing, I know you are…" Derek teased as she laughed a little harder. Emma sipped the water and looked at her mother, her eyes were filled with happiness, that seemed to overshadow the sickness that they all knew she was feeling. "Shall we?" He asked, reaching his hand for Meredith, who glanced to the tree and back to Derek, reaching her hand up, she took his hand softly and allowed him to pull her up, as the three of them walked toward the Christmas tree and Adam. Derek turned and released her hand, walking to their chairs, he grabbed their bags and belongings, and brought them all toward the Christmas tree, as he rushed back over to stop Adam from opening all of the gifts as he walked around the tree, shaking gifts.

Meredith watched Derek put the bags beside a closer chair, and she watched the two children grinning excitedly. "I want to open one!" Emma said happily as she moved toward her mother, taking her hand, Meredith pulled her close as she sat down on the worn carpet beside the tree, reaching for one of the gifts that she knew was Emma's.

"Alright… here is your first gift…" She said as she felt her daughter's forehead as she sat down, feeling the heat in her skin, she was happy that her daughter was moving around a little.

"Adam?" Derek said as Adam ran to Derek and sat down beside him as Derek started to sit down. "Here you go…" he said with a smile as Adam reached for the gift and the two kids tore into their gifts happily.

The children exclaimed their happiness at their gifts, laughing and talking about Santa and Christmas. The sadness and sickness was all thrown to the side, as things seemed to be looking up. They opened each gift quickly, exclaiming their excitement as Derek and Meredith talked and laughed together as well, the two children giggled together and seemed to get along very well together as they compared toys and stories of Santa Claus.

------------

At one point during the gift opening, Derek moved closer to Meredith, sitting beside her on the floor beside the Christmas tree, he leaned into her slightly and handed her a gift. "Here…" he said with a smile. "This one is for you."

"For me? You don't even know me…" She giggled.

"So? I must have knew I was going to meet you today… because I bought this just for you." He teased.

"You're being ridiculous…" She said shyly as she shook her head.

"Oh, just open it… you'll love it."

She shook her head and laughed, kindly taking the package from Derek's hand. She gave him a humored, disapproving look as she began to tear the wrapping from the package. She pulled the gift out and gave Derek a humored expression

"What?" He asked with a slight smile on his lips as he shrugged. He glanced to the kids as they played with the toys they had already opened, talking to one another and playing as kids can, without worries of self consciousness or fear of rejection. They eased into play naturally as Derek glanced to Meredith and smiled.

"What is it?" She asked as she tilted her head at the box.

"It's… here… see… I saw it, and I thought that you'd like something a little slinky for Christmas." He shrugged, pulling the metal spring toy from it's box.

"Slinky?" She asked as she gave him an incredulous look and shook her head. "You thought I'd like something Slinky for Christmas?" She asked as she watched his cheeks turn a bit red in embarrassment for his joke, not thinking that it may be a tad inappropriate to tell a complete stranger that. He swallowed hard and opened his mouth to respond, but before he could, she had grabbed it from his hands.

"It's cold outside…" She said with a playful giggle. "I think a slinky is more of a 'spring' item than Christmas." She said as it took Derek only a split second, but he was then laughing along with her as her cheeks turned a light pink as she laughed harder, leaning her head on his shoulder as he put his arm around her slightly in a friendly gesture. "Thank you for the gift." She said with a smile as she watched him. "Um… here…" She said as she lifted a random gift from the two or three remaining wrapped gifts and handed it to him.

"You don't know what it is, do you?" He said as she shrugged.

"Luck of the draw." She shrugged back as he laughed. Emma looked up as he turned the gift in his hands, Adam stood up and walked around behind his father as they all watched Derek glance at Meredith before slipping his finger under the wrapping. He carefully tore the wrapping and tape away from the gift, and lifted the gift in the air as he and Meredith both let out a loud laugh.

"That's a doll!" Emma exclaimed. Partly in surprise, partly in dismay as she looked to her mother. "Mommy, you gave him a doll for Christmas?"

"Haha! Daddy has a doll!" Adam laughed as he pointed at the little pink dress clad doll in Derek's hands as Derek's ears turned a deep shade of red and he started to laugh. Meredith giggled along with him as he chuckled at the gift.

"I think this is for you, sweetheart." Derek said as he handed the gift to Emma, whose smile lit up her face and she laughed.

"Thank you, Derek!" She exclaimed as she snatched up the doll and cradled it in her arms as Derek smiled.

"I think this is for you, Adam…" Meredith said with a smile as she handed the slinky to Adam, who smiled and shook his head.

"No, no… Merry Christmas to you, Meredith." He said. "You can keep the slinky. It was a gift from Daddy and me." He said with a smile as he turned around. "Besides… I got my rocket toy!" He exclaimed as he held up a little plane that had a button to drop small missiles. He grinned as he pushed the button, sending a missile falling to the ground with a 'bomb' sound, the little boy exclaiming a big explosion as Meredith glanced to the slinky and smiled.

"Thank you, Adam." Meredith said with a smile as she glanced to Derek. "Thank you, Derek." She said politely as Derek shook his head and laughed.

"It's the least I could do." He said with a laugh as he smiled.

"Excuse me…" An airport employee said as she walked to the laughing group. "You're going to have to put that tree back across the hallway… I don't know why it's over here…" She said a little confused by the goings on.

"Oh… of course, I'll put it back in a minute…" Derek nodded as he winked to Meredith who giggled. "Also… I need to make sure that our tickets are ready for this morning, are the planes able to take off this morning."

"Everything should just be about on schedule sir." She said politely. "Just put the tree back, and we'll be sure to take care of you."

"Thank you." Derek said as the airport employee walked away. Derek looked to Meredith, who giggled. "What?" He asked as she continued to giggle.

"I told you that you were going to get in trouble…" She said as Derek shook his head and laughed.

"Yeah… well… I'm going to tell them it was your idea…" He said with a chuckle as he stood up and stepped back, missing Meredith's half hearted swipe to smack his leg, as he laughed and went to move the tree back.

-------------------

Derek moved the tree across the hallway as Meredith pulled Emma's gifts from the floor and carefully placed most of them in the bag that they had been in when they were wrapped. He went to the counter to double check his reservation on the first available flight, and then turned to watch Meredith for a moment. She was crouched down picking up toys as she watched her little girl sit on the chair nearby their bags, cradling her doll in her arms as she talked sweetly to it. She glanced up to see Derek walking toward her, a smile on his face as he approached Adam. He lifted his own bag from the floor and began to pack away his son's gifts.

"Daddy, I can't believe Santa came to the airport…" He said with a smile as he helped his father put the gifts in the bag, his eyes lifting to meet Meredith's as she gave him a knowing smile.

"He must have known you have been an extra good boy this year." Derek shrugged as he ruffled his son's hair as the little boy smiled. "Are you going to keep that toy with you?"

"Yes! It's my favorite." He said with a grin as he ran over toward their bags and climbed into the chair next to Emma. The airport was starting to fill with more people, bustling to find their gates for the first flights of the morning.

Derek was lifting up another toy, placing it in the bag as he noticed two familiar shoes stepping up to him. He looked up and smiled as he stood up and came face to face with her. He zipped up the bag and watched her glance to the two children as they talked and showed one another their gifts. "Thank you for the beautiful Christmas." She said politely as she watched his eyes look into hers, sparkling.

"Thank you for a beautiful Christmas." He said back to her as he watched her cheeks turn a slight shade of pink as she gave him a soft smile. He could see that her eyes were watering, but he was unsure if it was because she was being emotional, or if it was from her cold. He glanced to the little girl as she started to cough, leaning slightly as she tried to catch her breath, he turned quickly away from Meredith and crouched down to her, watching her take a deep breath and cough again, sending a wave of air across into his face as he touched her cheek. "Here…. Sit up… sit up a little more…" Derek said in a soothing voice as the little girl sat up. He reached up and touched her throat slightly, feeling the swollen lymph nodes, he tilted his head in concern as he watched the agony in the little girl's face.

"I wanna go home…" She whined as her coughing stopped, leaning her head on her doll as she stared into Derek's eyes.

"Don't worry, baby…" Meredith said softly as she lifted the bag to the seat beside her daughter as Derek looked up at her. "We'll be in Boston really soon… and then we'll go see the doctor." She said as Derek stood up, letting Meredith crouch before her daughter. "We'll be there very soon."

"Meredith, I don't think she should be flying like this…You should take her to see a doctor first." Derek said, blurting it out before he could catch himself, unsure of what her reaction would be, he watched as her head snapped up and she glared at him, before turning her attention back to the little girl.

"We'll be in Boston, and you'll get all better, baby… and mommy can get some medicine… and it'll be alright… it'll be alright, just a couple more hours." She said softly as she touched her daughter's cheek, feeling the heat in her skin radiating, she reached her hands out and felt the little girl's arms around her neck, she lifted her from the chair and turned, holding the little girl as she sat down in the chair, dipping her nose into the little one's soft curls. "We'll be there, and it'll all be better." She whispered as she noticed Derek still had not moved from his spot, she looked up at him and caught the concerned look in his eyes. "I can take care of it." She said coldly. "Thank you."

"Meredith… I don't think she should…"

"She'll be fine." Meredith said as she glared at Derek. "She will be fine, it's a couple of hours." Meredith said as she sat up with the little girl. She glanced to the counter and stood up, still holding Emma in her arms.

"Where are you going?" Derek asked as she snapped her head in his direction.

"I'm going to make sure I'm on that first flight." She said, shifting her daughter in her arms. She grabbed her bags carefully and glanced to Derek. "Derek, it was nice to meet you…" She said shortly, glancing to Adam. "Adam… It was very nice to meet you…"

"It was nice to meet you, Meredith." He said with a grin as he waved at her. "Bye…"

"Bye." Meredith said nicely to Adam, her eyes moving to Derek as she gave him a polite smile and walked past him toward the counter, her heavy bags dragging along with her, her daughter securely in her arms.

Derek watched Meredith as she walked away, Emma's body pressed against her mother's tightly, struggling to walk to the counter, though she walked with purpose and strength. He watched as she talked to the woman at the counter, nodding and giving her a polite smile as she typed into the computer, she watched the woman give her a set of tickets as she nodded. He glanced to the chair where his son was sitting, kicking his feet as they hung off the chair, his fingers fiddling with his new toy. Derek gave his son a half smile and sat down, moving his son's blanket slightly as he settled into his chair, his eyes going back to the counter. There was no sign of Meredith, she had slipped away in the moments of him finding a seat. He sighed softly as he shook his head, his eyes moving slightly around as he sighed.

"I liked her." Adam said as his eyes never left his toy.

"Who?" Derek asked, unsure if Adam was even talking to him.

"Meredith." He said as he looked up at Derek, his blue eyes sparkling. "She smelled pretty…like a mommy." He said happily, as he looked back down to his toy, his words seeping into Derek's mind as he sighed, settling in as they waited for their flight to be called.


	2. Home is Just A Word Without You

Meredith held Emma close to her as she stood in line to hand her ticket over. She took a casual look around her as she stood among the other passengers, some of them well rested, some of them frustrated, none of them smiling. She felt lonely among the group of strangers around her, the warm feeling that she had felt as her daughter opened her gifts beneath the small airport Christmas tree had dissipated into something colder, darker. Something impersonal and as far away from where she was at that moment. She took a step forward, pulling her bags along as she reached her hand out with her ticket for she and Emma as she carried the now sleeping child against her. The airline person handed her ticket back to her, scanned and approved and she glanced back one more time, perhaps to see if she could see that dark haired stranger one last time before she disappeared down the long hallway toward the plane. She didn't see him, or his pint sized angel anywhere in sight and sighed deeply as she turned her head and walked down the hallway toward the plane.

She reached the plane, finding the smell of the old airliner to be stale and old, the flight attendant that greeted her was also stale and old, and she ushered Meredith and her daughter along without even looking into her eyes. She swallowed hard thinking of the impersonal services she was receiving from this early morning flight, wondering for a moment if an evening flight would be any more enjoyable, knowing that it probably wasn't, especially not on Christmas Eve. No one wanted to work on Christmas eve, well, no one other than her mother would want to work on Christmas eve, and Meredith imagined that the 'friendly skies' was only a myth this time of year.

She walked far into the back of the plane, the 'cheap seats' as she had dubbed them, a small, cramped space with room for only one small bag beneath the seat in front of them. She slid the little girl's pink backpack beneath the seat, and lugged her heavy, sickly body over the two seats in front of her, to the window and it's mate. She glanced behind her, seeing an impatient man, standing staring at her bags on the two remaining seats in the row, as the line of passengers behind him grew. He stared at her bag, and instead of offering to move it, he waited impatiently while she placed her sleeping daughter in the window seat and moved to put the bags above the row of seats.

He huffed a frustrated sigh at the young woman, as she glanced to her daughter, who began to cough loudly and with an unhealthy bark that sent the man's eyes rolling as he waited for her to slide her bag into the overhead compartment. She attempted to give him a glare, only succeeding in giving the man a desperate glance as she turned sharply and flopped down in her assigned seat beside her daughter, reaching into her purse for the small bottle of water that Derek had purchased for her little girl. The little girl grabbed the bottle with both hands as her eyes went to her mother, tears brimmed at the base of her eyelids as Meredith whispered promises of feeling better. The man who had been waiting, slammed himself into the seat with a frustrated growl as he elbowed Meredith mistakenly, and without apology, pulled his arm back and adjusted the items in the seat pocket before him, searching his coat pocket for a cough drop or perhaps a gas mask, the way that he was trying to avoid the little girl's germs.

Meredith watched each of the people who entered the coach section of the plane, unable to see the first class passengers, she waited to see if she recognized anyone, only to see more and more grumpy, tired, frustrated faces walking onto the plane. She sighed and looked down at her hands as she reached across and buckled Emma into the plane seat. She leaned down and kissed the tiny four year old on the head as she ran her thumb over her forehead, feeling the fever. She lifted her purse into her lap and looked once more for any more medication for the little girl, sighing with a slight pout as she only found the empty container of children's Tylenol deep in the depths of her purse. "We'll be there really soon, baby…" She whispered, watching as an older woman sat beside the impatient man, his hand now covering his mouth and nose with a handkerchief. Meredith wondered for a moment if he would be keeping it there for the entire trip. She sighed to herself and shook her head, glancing to her little girl once more as her eyelids began to droop, when suddenly she heard a familiar voice ring out.

"Adam!" Derek shouted as Meredith looked up to see the row of people all dodging something below her line of vision as suddenly, a dark haired little boy skidded to a stop in the row of Meredith.

"Mommy!" He exclaimed as he waved.

"Adam?" Meredith said, a slight smirk on her face as she tried to figure out what the little boy was thinking. Why was he calling her Mommy.

"Mommy, I was looking all over for you! Daddy said he didn't think you were going to be here! We thought you missed us! Daddy was so wrong!" He turned his head and waved his hands as more impatient people were moving aside as Derek worked his way through the aisle of people toward his son. "Daddy! Here she is! Here is Mommy!" He exclaimed happily as he pushed his way past the old woman and the impatient man, depositing himself in Meredith's lap, she couldn't help but smile at the little boy's boldness as she took him into her arms and hugged him. "Oh, Mommy, I missed you so!" He said as Derek finally reached the row.

"There you are!" Derek said with an exasperated sigh, watching his son hug the young woman as she glanced at Derek.

"Derek… what is…?"

"I can't believe the airline did this again… separating our seats like this… Sweetheart…" Derek said as he shook his head. "We're up in first class… let me see your ticket…" He said as he turned to the flight attendant as she worked her way toward them as more impatient people watched on, the man in the seat beside Meredith was becoming more agitated by the second.

"Sir, you're going to have to go back to your seat." The flight attendant said with a sigh.

"Ma'am… my wife was placed in the wrong seats… my daughter and my wife were supposed to be in first class with me." Derek said as he watched the little girl as she looked up at Derek, her eyes filled with pain as she coughed. She looked to her mother and then back to Derek.

"Ma'am, let me see your tickets, please?" She said as she shook her head.

"I think I'm in the right seat…" Meredith said as she pulled her tickets out and held onto Adam as he continued to hug her, kissing her neck and cheek, mumbling 'mommy' the entire time. She handed them to the flight attendant and waited.

"No, sir… this is her seat…"

"Well, I'd like to pay for them to move up to first class with me… I don't want my family separated on our first trip home for Christmas… it'd be a shame…" He said, his voice was inflecting strangely and Meredith shook her head in disbelief of his antics.

The flight attendant opened the seating chart in her pocket and looked at Derek's ticket as she nodded. "Sir, the two seats beside you are free… Ma'am…. If you come with us, we'll move you to your new seat."

"Derek…" Meredith shook her head as he smiled a brilliant smile at her, making her heart melt as he held out his arms.

"Here… give me Adam…" He said as Adam held tightly for a moment, and let go after a second as Derek lifted him up, and to the floor. Derek held his shoulder as he held out his other arm. "Give me Emma's bag…" he said as he reached over the irritated man, nearly elbowing him in the face as he lifted the pink backpack over their heads, he shoved himself into the seat as he reached for the little girl. She held out her arms to him, and he was able to lift her, the doll, and her blanket all from the seat in one swoop, lifting her over the seat, the man, and the old woman on the end as she reached and gripped his shirt, her face moving to Meredith as Derek shook his head. "Let's go, dear… they're not going to wait all day!" He said as he held the sick child to him and watched Meredith as she stood up, shoving her way from the seat as she 'accidentally' stepped on the irritated man's foot, whispering a halfhearted apology as she went.

Derek held the little girl against him as Meredith reached up for her other bags. "No." Derek said softly. "I'll come back and get them in a couple minutes…" he said as he pushed himself back, letting her in front of him as he pointed. "Second row…" He said, pointing ahead of them as Adam grabbed Meredith's hand, grinned up at her, and led them proudly to their new seats in the front of the plane, as Derek held the sick little girl to his body, kissing her tiny cheek, as she cuddled into him for the long, crowded walk to their seats.

* * *

Meredith kept glancing back to Derek as they walked down the aisle, Adam pulled her along as they pushed past people in the aisle and made their way back to the front of the plane. Adam pointed to the second row, hopping slightly as he grinned. "There's our seats!" He said as he giggled, his eyes shining to his father's as Derek held up his finger to his lips. He watched Adam straighten up, and Meredith didn't miss it either, she turned her head to look at Derek, and noticed his hand moving down. She gave him a sideways glance, with a perplexed look and he shrugged as he nodded toward the seat.

"Your choice of seat." He said, nodding to the four seats in a row as Meredith glanced to him again.

"Meredith, you can sit here… and Daddy can put Emma there… and I can sit here!" Adam said excitedly as he showed her the third seat in the row, patting it with his little hand as he grinned at her. "That way you can sit next to me AND Emma!" He said excitedly as he lifted his toys from the second seat, moved toward the window and sat down, patting Meredith's seat again, a bright smile on his lips as he tilted his head.

Meredith looked to Derek, who shrugged, moving Emma slightly in his arms so that he was cradling her, her arms still securely on his neck as she pushed her body farther into him. She glanced around the seats as she sat down, noting that Derek and Adam's belongings were already stowed away, and it looked like they had been sitting for a while already. The extra leg room was enough for Derek to turn in the seat and pull Emma's blanket out, wrapping her securely with it, he crouched slightly as he extracted her arms from around his neck. "It's alright, sweetheart." Derek whispered as the little girl groaned, coughing slightly into his neck as she was pulled from his arms and carefully deposited in the seat beside her mother. Derek sat in his seat and reached for Emma's seatbelt at the same time that Meredith turned and reached for her seatbelt. They nearly smacked heads as Meredith's hands touched his. He paused for a moment, moving his hands slowly away as she tilted her head in thanks and buckled her daughter in.

"Are you buckled in, buddy?" Derek asked Adam as the little boy leaned forward around Meredith and nodded.

"Uh huh!" He nodded as he looked out the window. "I can see the ground, Daddy…" He said with a smile as he pointed out the window.

"We haven't gone anywhere yet…" Derek said with a humored expression as Adam giggled and looked back out the window.

"Derek…" Meredith said as she looked over at him, lifting her head from Emma's attention. "You really didn't have to do this."

"Give me a break…" Derek said as he shook his head. "There is no reason that my friend should have to sit way in the back of this airplane with that stuck up Scrooge that you were seated beside… really, what was his problem, anyway?"

"Derek…" She shook her head.

"What?" He said as he started to stand up.

"Did you two plan this whole thing?" She asked as Derek's eyes flashed to his son as a giggle was heard beside her, Meredith's eyes never leaving Derek's as his widened in a silly warning as the giggles increased.

"I'll be right back." Derek said, ignoring her question as he turned and started walking down the aisle. She turned her head and watched as he rushed down the aisle toward her old seat to get her bags.

Meredith sat back in her seat, staring for a moment at the seats in front of her, her eyes passing to the little boy sitting beside her. "Meredith?" He whispered as he looked up into her eyes.

"Yes, Adam?" She said as she watched the little boy's blue eyes sparkle. He turned in his seat a little and tugged on a small plush bear that had been tucked away beneath his arm, where Meredith didn't notice until just then.

"Can you hug my bear, please?" He said in a small voice, a deep thoughtful sigh coming from this little boy, was enough to send her heart beating faster, and a small lump forming in her throat.

"You want me to hug your bear?" She asked, watching him nod delicately as he insisted on her taking it from his hands.

"Please?" He asked again, waiting patiently for her to take it from him.

"Okay…" She said softly as she took the worn bear from the little boy's hands. He pushed a little forward in his seat as he watched her take it into her arms, hugging it close to her.

"Hug him a little tighter…" Adam said as he smiled, leaning in as he pressed his nose against Meredith's coat, she watched him smile and breathe in.

"What are you doing, you silly boy?" She asked as he pulled back and held his hands out to her, as she handed the bear back to the little boy.

"He's smelling you." Derek said, interrupting their conversation, a soft smile on his lips as he opened the overhead compartment and slid her bags inside. "Adam…" He said as Adam sat up and looked into his father's eyes. He shook his head and Adam brought the bear to his nose, breathing deeply.

"Mmm…" he said with a smile.

"Smelling me?" She asked as she glanced to Adam, and then back to Derek.

"He says you smell like a mommy." Derek said nonchalantly as he sat in his seat and buckled his seatbelt.

"A mommy?" Meredith said, glancing to the little boy, who still had his nose pressed against his bear as he stared out the window.

"I think he's wrong…" Derek said as he leaned forward to check on Emma as she cuddled her doll, he felt her forehead and leaned down for his bag. Meredith remained quiet for a moment as she watched him shift through his bag for a moment. He reached in and pulled out a bottle of children's Tylenol and handed it off to her with a smile.

"Wrong?" Meredith whispered as she accepted the bottle with no questions, she glanced to Emma as her eyes moved back to meet Derek's.

"Yep…" He nodded. "I think you smell more like… a flower… or a nice perfume…" Derek said with a half smile. "But he could be right." Derek shrugged. "I'm not going to argue with him."

"You two are way too much…" Meredith said as she shook her head and glanced to Adam, his head turning as his eyes sparkled when his lips curled into a smile.

"Daddy says that you and him are soulmates." He shrugged. "Whatever that is…" He giggled as he snuggled his bear and looked out the window again, not seeing Meredith's eyes snap to Derek's as he laughed nervously.

"Sole mates… SOLE… mates… like the bottom of your shoe… the sole of your shoe?" He said defensively as he pointed at her shoe, waiting for her reaction, her eyes still wide as suddenly a sparkle appeared in her eyes as she laughed, her giggle was uproarious and foreign, a sound so beautiful him, unlike anything he had heard before, sending shivers down his spine as she laughed, a smile brought to his face as he laughed as well, the only two people laughing in the entire plane, but it didn't matter, because to the two of them, they and their two little partners, were the only things that mattered.

* * *

Derek and Meredith settled into their seats, and Meredith was able to give Emma her medicine with minimal mess, kissing the little girl's nose as she mumbled and coughed. "Oh, don't you be a grumpy bump with mommy…" Meredith said as the little girl's lower lip stuck out in an angry pout, her blue-grey eyes glassy. "Please…?" She whispered as she held a tissue for the little girl's nose, who swatted at her mother's arm.

"No…" She muttered angrily as she slapped her mother's hand. "No… leave me alone…" She groaned as she shifted in her seat, leaning forward as she coughed. "Bad, Mommy…" She grunted as she snuggled with her doll.

"Emma bug…" Meredith said softly as she reached for her daughter's hand, her little hand slapping her mother away.

"Stop! Stop…" She growled as Meredith retreated to her seat as the little girl curled herself into the seat and closed her eyes against her blanket, leaving Meredith feeling embarrassed and alone, her only companion for the past several months and she didn't even want her help.

"She's just not feeling well…" A deep voice caught her attention as she tried not to look up at him. She was trying to distance herself from him, but was finding it very difficult to do it. He was way too sweet, way too attentive, and way too prepared with his children's Tylenol, his packets of tissues, his extra lap blanket that he held in his carryon bag, to cover the little boy that sat on her other side. He was well prepared for this trip, whereas all Meredith wanted, was to be there already. Derek watched as she stared blankly at the chair in front of her, seemingly lost in her thoughts as Adam continued to stare out the window.

The plane began to move, and Meredith's attention still remained on the seat in front of them and nothing else as Adam became excited. "See… see, Meredith." He said as he reached for her hand, pulling her attention to the window. "See, that? We're going down the runway." He said with a smile. "We're driving down the runway and then… then the plane goes… WHOOSH!" He said, demonstrating with his hands, the ascent that the plane would soon be taking. "You can hold my hand if you get scared." He said tipping forward to see if Emma was paying attention, finding the little girl had closed her eyes and drifted off again. "Emma might get scared… has she been on a plane…?" he asked as Meredith nodded.

"She has…" She said with a nice smile, watching the little boy become visibly relieved that his job of calming them could be reserved for Meredith, he squeezed her hand. "Watch…" he said, poking at the window. "Watch out the window." He pointed.

"What are we looking for?" Meredith asked as the plane started to go faster.

"Do you feel that?" The little boy asked excitedly, pointing out the window. "Look how fast we're going!"

"Wow…" Meredith said, smiling slightly at the little boy, grateful to have a little distraction for the moment.

"Here we go!" Adam exclaimed as the plane lifted from the ground, dipping slightly as Adam giggled excitedly. "You're not scared, are you?" He asked as Meredith turned her head from the window. "If you're scared, squeeze my hand… it'll be alright." He said as he glanced to Derek, who watched his son proudly as he held the woman's hand tightly.

"Thank you, Adam." Meredith said with a slight smile as she squeezed the little boy's hand in thanks.

"it's no problem… I've been on a plane like a million times… right, Daddy?" He asked, looking toward Derek. "Right, Daddy? I've been on a plane like a million times, right, daddy…"

"You've been on quite a few times, yes…" Derek chuckled as the little boy smiled proudly at Meredith. "He's very good at flying." Derek said slightly as Meredith smiled, her eyes passing to her daughter, who was sitting, sleeping soundly, her head resting against Derek's arm.

Meredith watched her daughter sleep, soundly and peacefully against the stranger's arm and she could feel the lump, growing in her throat. She could feel the frustration of it all, the sickness making her own body feel exhausted, her own fever was taking its toll on her strength. She paused for a moment as she yawned, watching for the little boy to look to her again, his eyes mesmerized by the land below them as he smiled happily at their adventure, his eyes staring out the window as he smiled at the woman in the seat next to him.

Meredith sighed as she looked to her daughter, seeing that her doll was falling from the seat, she reached down and touched it, tugging slightly to pick it up, when suddenly her daughter's eyes opened, and the sick little girl swung at her angrily. "Mommy, stop! Stop bothering me, stop bothering me… Bad… Bad, Mommy!" She exclaimed as she slapped her mother on the hand.

In a flurry of movement, and before Derek could stop her, Meredith was out of her seat and moving toward the bathroom. It was against the lights of the plane, the red seatbelt sign still brightly lit, as Meredith moved forward sharply, turned the corner, and slammed the door on the portable bathroom, before Derek had a chance to stop her.

"Mommy?" Emma whimpered, her lip sticking out as she realized her mother had disappeared without her. She suddenly felt lonely and sad, as the tears began flowing down her cheeks, Emma let out a loud, frustrated sob, that nearly broke Derek's heart, as he tried to calm both children and himself, as he tried to figure out a way to get to the bathroom, and to Meredith… without completely abandoning his tiny sidekicks.

* * *

Derek was stunned for a moment at Meredith's departure, and Emma had burst into a fit of tears that seemed never ending. Derek leaned forward and tried to get her to look at him, tears streaming down her face as she held her hands out toward the bathroom door where her mother had disappeared through. "Emma…" Derek said softly. "Emma, look at me, please?" Derek said desperately, unsure of exactly how to soothe her. The one thing she wanted was gone, and he was sure she felt as guilty as a four year old could feel about making her flee so quickly and without a word. "Emma…"

"Mommy! I want Mommy! Please don't leave, Mommy!" She exclaimed as she held out her hands, her tiny fingers flexing as she screamed, pushing Derek away from her as she sobbed.

"Emma…" Adam said from beside her. "Emma, your mommy is just going potty!" Adam said as he plugged his ears and looked to the little girl. "Emma!" He shouted as the little girl turned to the little boy as he shook his head, his nose scrunched, his eyes narrowed as he shook his head. "Stop screaming!" he said as the little girl's howling slowed.

"But my mommy… she left! She left and I want her… want my mommy… want… want…" She started to pant as she coughed, her lungs catching every breath as her coughing became more loud and forceful. Derek touched her shoulder as she turned her head toward him, her eyes wide with surprise as she coughed violently.

"Calm down, little girl… Calm down…"

"But… But… but…" She wheezed as she tried to catch her breath, only to have one cough after another take over her body. Derek could sense everyone in the first class section staring at him, he could feel his ears burning, but right now the only thing he needed was for the little girl to stop coughing before she made herself sick. "Ma… Ma… Mama…" She said as she continued to wheeze and cough.

"It's alright… it's okay…"

"Sir, is she alright?" The sound of the flight attendant behind him sent his eyes up to her.

"She's just trying to catch her breath." Derek said softly as the little girl continued to wheeze. "That's right… breathe deeply, baby…" He said softly, his voice gentle and soothing as the flight attendant stood above them as Derek watched her try to calm herself. "There you go… there you go… big deep breaths…good girl." Derek said as the little girl's eyes stared into Derek, and she copied his big, deep breaths, a smile coming to his lips as he watched the color return to her face, and her body calm at his soothing voice. "Now do you want me to get mommy?" He said tenderly as she nodded her head, her lip trembling. Derek then turned his head to the flight attendant. "Ma'am?" He said softly. "My… wife…" Derek swallowed as he glanced to the kids. "She is in the bathroom… and she's pregnant… I think she's sick… would it be too much trouble for you to keep an eye on these two while I check on her?" He asked as the flight attendant looked at the two children who looked up at her curiously.

"No problem." She said, smiling slightly as she glanced to the two wide eyed children as they watched the flight attendant for a moment as Derek unbuckled his seatbelt.

"Thank you." Derek said as he turned to the two children. "Kids… I will be right back… please… please, behave…" He shook his head as they both nodded. "I will be right back… thank you so much." He said softly as he glanced one more time at the children as they sat watching as Derek turned, and walked as quickly as he could to the plane lavatory, where Meredith was hiding.

* * *

Derek walked toward the bathroom door and leaned his ear against it gently. Over the sounds of the engine on the plane, he could hear the faint sound of sobbing on the other side of the door. His eyes passed to the front row passengers as they watched him address the woman behind the door that had stirred up such a ruckus when she left, and he took a slow deep breath. "Honey?" He said, his voice squeaking slightly as he tried to keep a straight face. "Sweetheart, are you alright in there?" He said, his voice rising slightly in volume as he addressed her. "Sweetheart?" he said again as he listened to her crying soften slightly. "Meredith, sweetheart…?" He said as he tried to play up his lie as best as he could. "Please open the door."

"No!" She exclaimed through the door, that sound coming through loud and clear as he sighed softly and looked to the floor.

"Please sweetheart?" He said, his voice slightly begging as he listened.

"No! Derek… Leave me alone! And stop calling me sweetheart!"

"Oh… you don't mean that, sweetie… please open the door, I want to check on you." He said, his eyes flashing to an older woman sitting in the front row, who was watching him with a concerned look, he gave her a flash of a smile as he leaned into the door slightly. "Sweetie… we're causing a scene… you're not supposed to be out of your seat… and I'm worried about you. Emma wants you to come out. She misses her mommy."

"Emma doesn't need me." She said from within the bathroom. "Emma doesn't need me." She repeated.

"Just open the door, Meredith… there's no use having this conversation through the bathroom door…"

"Go away, Derek!"

"Oh Meri… that's just your hormones talking… just let me in…"

There was a pause when suddenly, the door to the bathroom swung open. "What did you just say to me?" She growled angrily as Derek's jaw dropped.

"I… I…" before Derek could finish his sentence, she grabbed him by the sweater and pulled him into the bathroom with her, slamming the door and locking it as she pushed him to the other side of her. "I… I…"

"Shut up…" She said as she growled at him. "Just… shut up for a minute… " She shook her head as she grabbed her forehead with her hands and looked up at herself in the mirror. She could see the dark rings under her eyes, her hair, disheveled, her cheeks were stained with tears as she snapped her head in his direction.

"These things are a lot smaller than they appear." He said as he watched her angry glare.

"What did you want?" She asked as she wiped the tears from her face, trying to compose herself. "What did you want?" She asked again, sniffling as she watched his eyes soften at the sight of her.

"I needed to check on you."

"Where are the kids? You left them out there by themselves? Are you crazy?" She asked as she reached for the handle, he leaned forward and grabbed her hand.

"They're fine." He said, turning her around, he pressed her back against the door slightly as he kept his distance as best as he could, the tiny bathroom was hardly big enough for one person, let alone two grown adults. "Whisper." He said, watching her shake her head. "The entire plane doesn't need to know what is going on in here."

"That's because nothing is going on in here." She whispered angrily at him, trying to turn around, he grabbed her arms lightly.

"Meredith… please." He whispered.

"Please what? Please what, Derek? Please stop acting like a deranged fool? Please stop acting like a bad mother, a bad wife, a murderer? Please what, Derek?"

"Meredith… slow down." Derek whispered, shaking his head. "Slow down."

"Slow down? I don't want to slow down. I can't slow down, Derek… I've tried to slow down, and it isn't going to happen… I can't… I have to raise my baby… and I have to get her better… I have to get her to Boston so that I can make her better…" She said as she suddenly began to cough, her breath wheezing as she tried to catch her breath. "I can't…" She said between coughs. "Slow … down…" She coughed violently as she sucked in her breath time and again trying to catch her breath, she shook her head and tried to catch herself, as she tumbled forward into Derek.

"Woah…" He said as he grabbed her carefully, pulling her into him as she used his body to support herself for a moment, her coughing finally slowing as she continued to grip him. "It's alright…" He whispered. "It's okay…" He said as he felt her feverish body against him. He could feel her trembling, the heat of her fever and clammy sweaty skin of her hands. He felt her grip him hard with her fists, as she suddenly burst into a fit of tears against him, loud and forceful as he wrapped his arms around her and held her, unable to move an inch in the tiny bathroom, he was content to stay in there with her and hold her for as long as she needed. "I'm here…" He whispered.

* * *

Derek held the sobbing woman in his arms, feeling her weight against him as she gripped his sweater tightly in her grip. She buried her head in his chest and sobbed. She had been trying for months to remain strong, to remain whole and emotionally stable for herself, for her daughter and their situation. She had spent all of the time and effort that she had available in keeping her little girl safe and secure, that she had no idea how quickly and how far she had deteriorated herself.

"It's alright…" He whispered. "It'll be alright…" His voice was soft and soothing as he gently rubbed her back, holding her close to him. She sniffled and cried for several moments until she realized what she was doing, hugging a stranger in the bathroom of an airplane while her daughter sit alone and probably scared half to death in her seat.

"I have to get out of here…" She whispered as she released his sweater and began to turn in his arms. "I have to get out…" She said again.

"Meredith…" he said, touching her shoulder, she turned and looked him in the eyes.

"Thank you for… checking on me, but I have to get back out there to Emma." She whispered.

"Meredith, you can't do this alone." Derek blurted out before he could stop himself, her eyes narrowing in anger. "Stop looking at me like that." He said, trying to stop himself from digging the hole he was in any deeper, but finding himself unable to look at the anger in her eyes any longer. "I haven't done anything to you… I haven't done anything to you but wonder who you are and where you're coming from, because I have found you to be so goddamned intriguing that watching you look at me like that makes my goddamned teeth hurt." He said as the anger in her eyes drained slowly, her eyes widening to a nearly surprised expression as he shook his head. "So stop looking at me like I'm doing something wrong… and just talk to me." He said with a whisper as her mouth hang open just slightly.

"I don't know you." She said simply, the truth behind her pulling away was staring him in the face, and he knew that fact was a road block.

"And that should only help you." He replied.

"I don't know what you want from me." She said as she shook her head, feeling herself swallow hard as she looked into his eyes. "What do you want from me?"

"I don't want anything from you, Meredith. My intentions are clear… there are no intentions… you were a stranger to me… but the moment your shoe connected with the back of my head, you became something to me… what that is, I'm not certain… but I'm not a threat, I'm not a creep…and I've asked you to be my friend and you accepted… are you trying to tell me that you want to take that back?"

"No." She whispered.

"Then you can talk to me." He said. "What are the chances we'll see one another again after this plane lands? You don't have anything to lose." He replied.

"Self respect." She whispered. "You've bought my daughter water… you've gotten her Tylenol… you even moved us from the back of the plane to first class… I feel like I'm in the middle of a swindle. I feel like you want something from me, like… I don't know, it just makes me feel weird, and I don't want sympathy, and I don't want hand outs… I can take care of myself. I can take care of my daughter, and I can take care of myself!" She said as she turned, reaching for the handle, he placed his hand on hers as she paused.

"You can take care of your daughter, Meredith… but please don't do it at the expense of yourself. Because she can survive a cold, and she can survive you crying from time to time, showing her that it's alright to have weaknesses… but she can't handle you dying because you're too consumed with taking care of her to take care of yourself. That is something she shouldn't have to live with." Derek whispered. "That is something that you can control." He replied as she continued to pause, her eyes never leaving the door.

"Are you finished?" She whispered, waiting for him to remove his hand from her hand, he did so and she swung the door open, pushing her way into the aisle of the plane, she turned toward the seats.

Derek paused for a moment, his eyes watching the door close behind her as he took a slow deep breath. He then reached for the door handle and walked out into the plane following Meredith. When he reached the seat, Meredith hadn't sat down yet, but was instead looking back toward the bathroom for Derek. When he reached their seats, he smiled when he saw what had stopped Meredith in the aisle.

Adam looked up from his picture book, the arm rest beside him was raised, and Emma's head rested on his shoulder. Their blankets covered both of them as the little girl's eyes remained closed in a delicate slumber. He smiled at his father and Meredith, and lifted his finger to his lips to indicate that they should be quiet. Meredith turned to look at Derek, her eyes brimming with unshed tears, but the delicate smile on her face indicated that they were tears of gratitude.

"It looks like my looks aren't the only thing he got from me." Derek said with a wink as Meredith let out a nervous laugh, shaking her head at his brashness, she sat down in the third seat, buckling her seatbelt. She looked up at Derek as he turned to sit down, and as his butt hit the seat, he felt the armrest between them lifting. He didn't say a word as he buckled his seatbelt, and felt her exhausted, sweet smelling head tilt slightly and rest on his shoulder as he reached his arm around her and held his worn out friend, as silence filled the second row of the airplane.

* * *

Meredith's nose was buried into Derek's chest, her body was warm to the touch, and Derek knew she was in need of rest, so he held her securely to him as she cuddled into him. He held her for a long time, trying his very best to relax, finding his mind wandering in directions that he knew were not right. Derek's eyes glanced to the two seats beside Meredith, his son sitting up comfortably, the sick little girl cuddling against his arm, he smiled at the symmetry of the situation and raised his eyebrows at his son's inquisitive look when he noticed that his father was looking in his direction, and their eyes met.

"How are you doing there, buddy?" He asked, watching Adam nod, careful not to jostle his friend who had found him to be a worthy pillow.

"I'm okay." He shrugged, flipping the page on his book, he looked over the pictures and sighed softly.

"Just okay?" Derek asked as his son's blue eyes lifted to his father's.

"Yeah…" He shrugged.

"Do you care to share your troubles with an old guy looking for someone to talk to?" Derek asked as he watched the corners of his son's lips turn up.

"You're not an old guy, Daddy." He said with his lips curling a little more as his eyes moved to the woman resting on his father's chest. "I like Meredith." He said softly as he shrugged his shoulders, looking back to her book.

"You like her?" He asked softly, his eyes passing to the woman's closed eyes as she didn't move an inch, sleeping peacefully against his chest.

"She's really nice… even though she threw her shoe at you." Adam giggled.

"Yeah… little did she know it was going to get her stuck with us, huh?" He asked as Adam nodded his head, watching Derek smile at him.

"Do you think she'll want to be my friend too?" Adam asked.

"I think she might have that in her schedule…" Derek said as he watched the concerned look on Adam's face. "What's wrong?" Derek asked.

"Do you think she knows how to sing?" Adam asked, his eyes darting to his father's eyes.

"Sing?"

"Yeah… like a lullaby… Do you think she sings lullabies…?"

"Buddy… these are all questions that you're going to have to ask her…" Derek said as he watched Adam's eyes fall on the little girl who was leaning on him.

"Girls are heavy." Adam said as he shifted slightly, Emma's head lifted as her eyes fluttered open. "Sorry." He said as she looked around, her face turning to a pout as she turned her head to see Derek looking at her, a tender smile on his lips as she noticed her mother was sleeping against him.

"Mama…" She whispered.

"See… mama came back…" Derek said softly as the little girl smacked her lips, it was obvious that she wanted to reach out and touch her mother, to wake her, to hug her. "Are you thirsty, sweetheart?" Derek asked as Emma nodded her head, glancing to the bag below them under the seat, she saw the bottle of water poking out of it. "Adam…"

"I'll get it." He said as he unbuckled his seatbelt and slid from the seat, reaching for the bottle, there was a sudden slam of turbulence as Adam fell forward.

"Woah…" Derek said as he reached out to grab his son before he landed on the ground, sending Meredith jumping in fear as she had a sharp intake of breath, her eyes opening wide as she grabbed hold of Derek's other arm, she looked around rapidly as Adam stood up, glancing to his father with wide eyes. "Are you alright?" He asked as Adam nodded his head.

He grabbed the bottle of water and handed it off to Emma as he scooted to his seat and jumped into it, buckling his seatbelt as another bout of turbulence hit. "Oh gosh! That was a close one!" The little boy exclaimed wide eyed and surprised as Derek nearly laughed at his expression. He would have laughed if it weren't for the fingers of Meredith digging into his arm.

"It's alright… It's alright… just a little bit of turbulence…" he said softly as Meredith released her grip and sat up, sending her hands to her face as she rubbed the sleep from her face. The plane began to settle, and after a moment, they were flying smoothly again.

"I'm sorry…" She whispered. "I'm sorry… that was…"

"Mommy?" Emma said as she held the bottle of water in her hands. "Mommy, are you alright?"

"Mommy is okay, sweetie… she's okay…" Meredith said as she leaned to the side and felt her daughter wrap her arm around her mother. "You're looking like you feel a little better…" She said as she touched her daughter's cheek. "Look at you…" She smiled as Emma gave her mother a soft smile.

"I'm sorry I yelled at you, mommy…" She whispered as she hugged her again. "Don't leave me again…"

"I'm not going anywhere…" She whispered as she kissed her daughter's head. "I'm not going anywhere…" She said again as she held her little girl against her.

"Meredith?" Adam asked as he watched the woman's eyes lift to his inquiring blue eyes.

"Adam…" Derek said, shaking his head as the little boy sighed.

"No, you can ask your question, Adam." Meredith said as she gave Derek a sideways brush that she was fairly sure she could hear a chuckle from.

"Do you sing?" He asked as Meredith continued to hug Emma as she watched Adam as his eyes passed between her and his father, as if he was asking permission from him to continue his questions.

"Do I sing?" She asked, a tiny giggle escaping her lips as she tried to understand what he meant.

"Do you know any lullabyes? Daddy said that mommies know lullabies… and not daddys… that's why he doesn't sing."

"Daddy doesn't sing because daddy would keep you up all night with nightmares if you heard him sing." Derek said as he listened to the tender sound of Meredith's giggles beside him.

"I've been known to sing a lullaby or two." Meredith said as she unbuckled Emma's seatbelt and pulled her into her lap. She kissed her daughter's forehead as she cuddled the little girl. She leaned slightly and pulled up the last arm rest as she patted it gently. "Here… we have a couple more minutes before we have to get ready to land… scoot over here…" She said as Adam grinned, unbuckling his seatbelt, he crawled across and settled against Meredith, cuddling in her arm, and against Emma. "Are you ready?"

"Uh huh!" Adam nodded as he closed his eyes and rested.

"Okay…" Meredith whispered as she very gently began to sing. She tilted her head down, so that it was between her daughter's and the little boy's, her cheeks turning a soft rosy pink as she tried to not think about Derek listening to her. She sang a tender lullaby to the two children, feeling their bodies relax against her, her voice moving up and down tenderly with the sound of the plane lulling them to sleep.

Derek found himself closing his eyes, a last chance to rest before the plane landed in Boston, as the gentle song sent him into a deep, satisfying sleep to the melodic sound of her heavenly voice.

-------------

Derek was sure that he felt something wet touch the side of his face. His eyes were closed and he knew he had been sleeping, but there was something different now that he was mildly cognizant of what was around him. He felt it again, something wet touching the side of his face, and a tiny giggle.

There was something missing. The sound of the plane. He had been on a plane, and now it was almost silent, and that wetness again, a louder giggle. "Alright… alright…" Meredith's voice interrupted his train of thought as he heard Adam's giggle again. He opened his eyes just in time to see a wet finger reach out and touch his cheek again.

"Oh! Ew!" Derek exclaimed as he reached his hand up and wiped the slobbery wet mark from his face as he gave his son a warning glance.

"Time to wake up, Daddy…" Adam said with a laugh, as Emma giggled as well, leaning on the seat behind them as they sat in the taxied airplane while the last of the passengers exited the plane.

"We're here?" Derek said in a low gravely voice, his head tilting when he watched her glance to the two children as they stood waiting to leave the plane.

"We're here." Meredith confirmed.

"Someone looks like they're feeling a little better." Derek said as he nodded toward the little girl. Her blonde hair had been tied back as they waited, and her cheeks were still rosy with fever, but her blue-grey eyes were sparkling like he hadn't seen before.

"Thank you for the Tylenol." Meredith replied as she handed the bottle back to him. He shook his head and nodded toward her purse.

"No…that's yours…" He said as he looked around, noticing they were the only four on the plane, besides the flight attendants. "We should probably get off the plane before they take us someplace else." He said with a wide eyed expression that made Emma giggle.

"Don't want that!" Adam exclaimed as he grabbed his backpack and his teddy bear, along with his rocket toy. Emma grabbed her doll as Meredith lifted her backpack and took her hand.

"Let's walk to baggage… and then we can part ways…" Derek shrugged as he smiled politely at her. "Unless you'd like to go to Christmas eve with me… and Christmas day tomorrow at my mother's house… we can play house… you can be my expecting wife, and I can be the proud papa of a beautifully growing family." Derek teased as he stood up and pulled his bag from the overhead compartment.

"I think that one is enough for now." Meredith nodded as she gave him a shy smile.

"I get it…" Derek said with a sarcastic smile. "I'm not marriage material."

"Destined to be a bachelor." She teased as she glanced to Adam. "That one though… someone is going to snatch up that charming little thing really quick… you better watch yourself, Derek." She said as she reached her hand for Adam, watching Derek pull her bag from the overhead compartment, he hauled all of the bags onto his shoulder as Meredith took the two children's hands and led them from the seat, the four of them making their way happily down the concourse hallway toward baggage.

Derek jogged a bit to keep up with them, holding the bags was weighing him down, but he did it effortlessly. "So are we going to trade numbers or something?" he asked, shrugging as she stopped.

"Numbers?"

"Phone numbers… you have a cell phone, don't you?"

"No." She replied, staring at him blankly for a minute as she shook her head.

"Address?" He asked as he tilted his head.

"Why don't… you give me your phone number and address." She said with a shrug. "And… I'll call or whatever… we don't have to trade information, Derek."

"Sure we do. I want to make sure you and Emma are feeling better… besides… Adam is pretty attached to you. You don't want to disappoint him, do you?" He said, indicating his son who was bouncing around on the carpet with Emma, skipping from blue square to blue square.

"Oh… that's right… I don't want to disappoint Adam…" She said as she laughed to herself. "I'll take your information… and when I get a cell phone… I'll um… I'll call you, okay? Let you know how we are."

"That sounds good." He said with a nod as he glanced to the kids. "Adam… Emma… come over here…" Derek said as the two kids ran over to their parents, and they all walked toward baggage claim together.

They got to baggage claim and they stood at the carousel for several minutes, Adam jumping as he asked if he could go for a ride as Derek just shook his head. Meredith and Emma stood beside them as they waited for their bags. After several minutes, Meredith saw a bag come out of another carousel and smiled to Derek. "That's my stuff…" She said as Derek nodded, seeing his and Adam's things coming around.

"It was really… nice to meet you, Meredith." He said as he pulled a pen from his pocket, along with an old business card. He wrote his address and phone number and smiled as he handed it over to her.

"It was nice to meet you, Derek." She said as she accepted the paper and slipped it into her pocket. "Thanks… for… being…my friend." She said with a sweet smile as Derek smiled back.

"Thanks for being mine." He replied as he leaned forward, giving her a soft peck on her cheek as he smiled at her slight smile. She stared at him for several moments until she felt the tugging of a small hand beneath her, pulling on her coat.

"Meredith… thank you for being my friend too." Adam said with a smile as Meredith bent down for a big hug. "Thank you too, Emma." He said as he waved to the little girl as she gripped her mother's hand and waved.

"Bye, Derek…" Emma said softly as she felt her mother tugging her as they walked toward their bags.

"Bye, Meredith… Emma…" Derek said one more time as he gripped his son's hand, reached forward and grabbed his bags from the carousel. By the time he turned to the other carousel, Meredith and Emma had disappeared, and the bag that she had claimed had been hers, continued to move around the carousel, alone.

------------------

Derek grabbed his bags in his hands and looked around again, the throngs of people swallowed any chance of him seeing her again, his eyes flashed back to the bag on the other carousel. He could feel his throat getting dryer as he watched his son move quickly through the airport directly in front of him, glancing back excitedly as they walked through the crowds that were greeting and hugging their families and friends who had met them at the airport. He looked around quickly, hoping to catch a glimpse of her, or the little golden haired angel, only to find the people were pushing and shoving past him to get on the escalator.

"Daddy, let's go! Aunt Nancy isn't going to wait forever!" He said as he grabbed Derek's hand, not realizing the look of longing on his father's face as he tried to locate Meredith.

"I'm coming, I'm coming…" Derek said in a playful tone as he finally gave up, he lifted their bags and followed Adam to the escalator as it led them down to the front lobby of the airport. He immediately spotted his sister's face among the people greeting, and she waved her hands in a hurried motion as she indicated that she was parked right outside.

"Aunt Nancy!" Adam exclaimed from the escalator, pointing down to the waving woman. "Daddy, t here's Aunt Nancy!"

"I see her…" Derek said flatly, his normally playful tone had disappeared and Adam watched his father's face for a moment as he held a grumpy expression in his eyes. They got to the bottom of the escalator, and Adam leapt from the step, running at top speed into his waiting aunt.

"AUNT NANCY!" He exclaimed as she grabbed him into her arms and spun him around as he giggled.

"Oh, it's my favorite little traveling man! Merry Christmas!" She said as Adam hugged her tightly.

"Merry Christmas to you, Aunt Nancy!" He exclaimed happily as he looked up at Derek. "Santa came to the airport this morning! He brought me this awesome rocket missile!" He said as he held up his new toy and Nancy gave him a surprised look.

"Wow… Santa came early…" Nancy said as she raised her eyebrows at Derek as he grumpily walked toward her.

"Santa was stuck in an airport… Santa didn't care to wait any longer for Adam to smile…" Derek replied as he ushered his sister. "Let's go… you probably parked illegally or something…"

"How did you know?"

"There's no other way to park in this airport… let's go." He said grumpily.

"What's gotten into you?" Nancy asked as Derek lugged the bags alongside her as they walked out of the airport.

"Nothing." Derek said as he shook his head. "Let's just get out of here, I'm tired." He said, taking one more look around the airport before they walked outside.

"So how are you boys doing?" Nancy asked her nephew as she tickled his tummy a little, listening to his giggle. "I have missed you so much! So, so much!" She said as she kissed his cheek.

"We missed you, Aunt Nancy…" He said with a grin as he glanced to Derek, watching his father's grumpy expression as he stared at the ground as they walked.

Meredith walked down the long hallway toward the taxi stands and bus stops, lugging her carryon bags along as Emma held her hand tightly.

"When are we gonna be there, Mama?" Emma asked as she coughed a little, her tiny feet slapping the pavement as she rushed to keep up.

"We'll be there when we get there, buttercup." Meredith replied with her standard answer for her daughter, unsure of exactly how to explain to her that there really wasn't anywhere for them to 'be'. "You and Mama are on a little adventure… we're going to get you to the doctors… get you some medicine… and then we're going to try to find someplace to stay." She said as she ran her fingertips over her daughter's head, feeling her cling to her side as Meredith stopped at the bus stop. She stepped into the shelter and lifted Emma onto the bench, her eyes shifting to the man sitting on the corner of the bench, staring at her. She shifted her body in front of her daughter, blocking her from his view as she reached her hand into her pocket.

"Crap…" She whispered to herself. "Where is that… ten dollars…" She mumbled as she pulled out a tissue or two, shoved them back in her pocket and then reached in again, her hand grasping the money that she had in her pocket. Her finger grazed a piece of cardstock and she swallowed hard. She pulled the card with the phone number and address from her pocket and stared at it. His writing was eloquent and readable, unlike a doctors handwriting. She wondered if he had written it extra clear so that she would be sure to call it. She sighed as she shook her head, her eyes grazing back to the man who was staring at them again, sending a chill down her spine, she swallowed hard.

She then crumbled the card up and turned, flipping it off her thumb she watched it tumble into the garbage can beside her. "Wishful thinking, Meredith." She whispered as she closed her eyes tightly, sat down on the bench and pulled Emma onto her lap. She tried to ignore the man staring at them from beside her, and she closed her eyes as she pushed her nose into her daughter's hair. "Where the hell has that ever gotten you?" She whispered to herself as she sighed.

* * *

Meredith sat at the bus stop for a long time, staring ahead as not to get any more attention than she already had from the man who was sitting on the bench with them. The man's eyes remained on her and her little girl, and the longer they sat there, the more uncomfortable she became. She wanted to tell him to go away, to stop looking at her, to stop invading her personal space, but she knew if she brought any more attention to herself from the man, it could make things ever more uncomfortable.

"Mama?" Emma whispered as she looked up at her mother. "I'm cold…"

"I know, baby… the bus will be here soon…" Meredith said, feeling the frigid air whipping against them as the little girl trembled in her arms.

"I'm cold…"

"Shh…" Meredith said tenderly as she pulled her daughter into her a little farther, the wait for the bus becoming more and more frigid for both fever laden mother and daughter. She sighed as she stood up, glanced to the taxi down the way, sitting in the taxi stand. She pulled her daughter into her a little more, and with a quick movement grabbed her bag and made her way down the sidewalk toward the taxi stand.

The farther she got from the staring man in the bus stop, the better she felt. She held her daughter close to her as she reached the taxi and opened the door. The taxi driver opened his door and she shook her head. "No… no, it's alright…" She said as she shook her head and lifted her daughter into the car. "This is all I have." She said as the taxi driver climbed back inside. She closed the door and buckled her daughter in as the driver waited patiently.

"Where can I take you?" He asked softly, watching the mother and child as she shivered.

"I have ten dollars." Meredith said as she looked at the driver. "Take me as close to Massachusetts General as you can, please?"

"That's not going to get you far, lady…" The taxi driver said with a shake of his head.

"Then take me to the nearest hospital… or as close to the nearest hospital…" She said as she began to get anxious. "Please… ten dollars, it's all I have…" She said as the taxi driver nodded his head, and started on his way as Meredith wrapped her arm around her daughter and waited for them to arrive at their destination, wherever that was.

-------------

Derek opened the back seat of the car and let Adam climb in. Nancy got into the driver's seat and helped him buckle his seatbelt as Derek moved to the back and put his bags in the trunk of the car. Derek could hear Adam talking with an animated grin on his face, his voice squeaking out his happiness of being back in Boston as Derek walked around the car and climbed into the passenger seat.

"Everyone is waiting for you at home." Nancy said with a smile, watching the sullen look on her brother's face. "Derek… seriously, what is wrong?"

"Nothing is wrong." Derek said with a sigh as he glanced to his sister. "I should have been home yesterday, that's all… being stuck in the airport isn't exactly my idea of a good time." He said as he glanced back to Adam.

"Daddy got hit in the head with a shoe…" He giggled as Derek gave his son a half smile in return.

"You got hit in the head by a shoe?" Nancy asked, incredulous of her nephew's claim, but she noticed the way Derek's eyes shifted back to the little boy when he said it, and the small smile on his lips.

"Yeah… it was only Meredith though…" Adam said with a giggle. "She was telling daddy that I had to go potty."

"Meredith?"

"It's just someone at the airport… she was stuck there too… with her little girl." Derek shrugged. "Was trying to get my attention when I feel asleep and Adam had to go to the bathroom… So she tossed her shoe in my direction…"

"She hit him in the head!" Adam laughed uproariously from the backseat, not catching that his father was trying to end the conversation before it even began. "Then daddy stole her shoe and we went and sat with her when we gave it back… she was nice… she smells like a mommy…" Adam blabbered as Derek continued to stare out the window as his sister started to drive.

"Smells like a mommy?" Nancy asked, looking over to see her brother avoiding eye contact.

"Yes… she hugged my bear for me, and daddy gave her a slinky for Christmas… Emma was really sick, so when we went on the plane, daddy gave Meredith a lots of hugs to make her feel better, and Meredith sang me and Emma a lullaby… she has such a pretty voice, doesn't she daddy? Doesn't she? Doesn't Meredith have a nice voice?" Adam stated from the back seat, unsure of why Derek wasn't responding right away, he paused as he waited for the answer. "Daddy?"

"Yep." Derek said with a nod as he looked back at his son, seeing his hopeful face as he smiled back at Derek. "She had a very nice voice… very pretty…"

"Daddy said that he and Meredith are soulmates." Adam said with a definitive grin as Derek coughed from the front seat as Nancy's eyes shot to her brother. Derek coughed loudly as he tried to pretend. "Daddy, are you sick like Emma and Meredith? Do you need Tylenol?"

"I'm fine, buddy…" Derek recovered as he sighed, again ignoring his sister's stares. "Just drive, Nancy." Derek muttered as he looked out at the early afternoon gloomy weather, as they crossed over into Boston proper, and headed toward Nancy and her family's home.

"Good… I don't want you to get sick like them…" He said softly. "I hope they're doing okay…"

"I do too, Adam." Derek nodded as he gave his son a hopeful smile as the little boy cuddled his bear, and silence filled the car.

* * *

Meredith sat anxiously in the back of the cab, she tended to her daughter as she listened to the sound of the car moving down the street slowly. She glanced out the window as the car passed to the city proper, and he drove down a smaller road. "Hey… where are you going?" she asked as she tapped on the plexiglass divider. "I wanted you to take me to the hospital… the hospital is that way…" She said as she pointed in the opposite direction, having been in Boston several times, she knew at least where the hospital was, and the cab driver ignoring her was making her upset. "Sir… you're wasting my fare!" She exclaimed. "I have to get my daughter to the hospital!" She exclaimed as he turned his head.

"Don't worry, I'm taking you someplace safe for you and your daughter." He said. His voice was kindly and polite, but she didn't like the idea of being taken away from where she had wanted to go.

"I need to get to the hospital… Seriously, do you speak English?" She asked angrily as she banged her palm against the divider.

"Ma'am… please relax, I'm taking you to a safe place."

"Stop the goddamned car!" She exclaimed, feeling herself panic as she banged on the plastic. "Stop the fucking car!" She exclaimed, feeling the anger building up inside her as she watched him turn into a driveway. The sign was large and in block letters. "YOU BROUGHT ME TO A FUCKING BATTERED WOMAN'S SHELTER?" She exclaimed as she slammed her fist into the plastic.

"Ma'am…you look like you need help… you look like…"

"I don't need your help! I don't need their help! I need a fucking doctor!" She screamed as she looked to Emma, who was staring at her in complete and utter fear. She had never seen her mother scream like this. She had never heard her mother speak so angrily, and it was frightening for the little girl. Emma's lip trembled as she suddenly began to cry. "Oh crap…" Meredith said as she turned and put her hands on her daughter's cheeks, feeling that the fever had come back, she glanced to the driver. "Look what you did, you idiot… merry goddamned Christmas to you… taking me to a fucking battered woman's shelter… what the hell do you think you're doing… here is your goddamned ten bucks!"

"No…" The driver said defensively. "Keep the money… keep it…" he said as Meredith pulled her hand back.

"Damn straight I'm keeping it!" She exclaimed as she grabbed her daughter from the seat, pulling her bags awkwardly.

"Ma'am… I'll help you from the…"

"No! Don't bother! Don't even bother!" She exclaimed as she flew backwards out of the car, slipping on the ice, she fell on her back in the middle of a snowbank, her daughter slamming hard into her as she sobbed. She just wanted to cry. She was mortified and broken, and she could feel the cold snow seeping through her clothes as the cab driver stood helplessly beside the car.

"Ma'am… I'll take you to the hospital if that's where you want to go!" He called, feeling bad for his assumption, he watched as she tried to stand up. He started to walk around the car.

"Don't you touch me! Don't you touch me or my daughter… I can handle this myself!" She exclaimed as she started to stand up, the frigid wind whipping her hair, the afternoon sky was dark and gloomy giving the sky an almost early evening shadow on everything. It matched her mood perfectly. She stood up carefully, feeling the pain in her body, sharp aches shooting through her body as she felt hot tears rolling down her cheeks. "My husband doesn't beat me, you asshole! My husband is dead!" She screamed as she turned and pulled her daughter into her as she slammed her feet in the snowy sidewalk, as she made her way down the street.

"Stupid idiot… stupid, stupid idiot!" She exclaimed as she felt her daughter crying against her. "Oh baby… oh don't worry, baby…"

"I'm so cold, Mama! I'm so cold!" She exclaimed as she cried, tears rolling down her cheeks, the snow from her mother's fall had fallen against her face as she continued to cry.

"Mommy is such a bad mommy… she is such a bad mommy… you poor little baby… my poor little angel…" She said as she pulled Emma into her and continued down the street. She listened to her daughter crying as she trudged through the snow, the busy road beside them sending slush and wet snow onto the sidewalk as it soaked through her shoes and made her toes sting. "Mama is going to get you to the hospital, baby… we're going to get you there…" She whispered as she heard another car drive by, and another, and another, all fast and almost angry, as she sobbed against her daughter, as Emma cried as well.

"Mama will get you there…" She said, breathing heavily as she stared at the snowbanks, finding them increasingly tempting to sit in, to rest, or to lie down. She shook her head as she felt the Christmas eve snow falling against her face, the snowflakes hitting her skin as they stung her fever heated cheeks, mixing in her daughter's hair as she walked angrily down the street mumbling to herself as she cried.

She was oblivious to the sound of the feet behind her, and she was oblivious to the sound of a man's breathing behind her, running to catch up with her, but as soon as his hand touched her shoulder, she had whipped around angrily, swung her foot as hard and as quickly as she could, sending the man behind her, and her shoe, flailing across the ice with a loud, deep, shout and a resounding 'thwump' as his body hit the ground, leaving the shocked woman and child standing above his body, staring wide eyed and stunned, unable to move or even comprehend what had happened.

* * *

Meredith stood above the man she had just flattened, her jaw dropped, and she could do nothing but stare at him as he grasped the back of his head. His eyes were clenched closed as he tilted his head back on the icy sidewalk.

"What the hell did you think you were doing?" She exclaimed suddenly, the sound of her voice was high pitched and filled with anxiety as she watched him roll onto his side, grasping his head.

"You're not even going to ask if I'm alright?" He asked as he groaned, cringing as he held his head.

"Oh!" She exclaimed suddenly, as if she had only just realized that she had hurt him, she placed her daughter on the ground as she rushed to his side, leaning down to cradle his head. "Are you alright?" She asked as she held his head softly, watching his eyes open and his blue eyes to stare into hers for a second.

"I think I'm all right…" He groaned as he held the bump on his head.

"Good…" she exclaimed as she grabbed her shoe from where it had landed on his chest. She smacked him hard on the leg with it. "NOW TELL ME WHAT THE HELL YOU THINK YOU WERE DOING!" She exclaimed as he jumped.

"Ow! That hurts!"

"Damn straight it hurts! Who sneaks up on a woman on the sidewalk and grabs their shoulder? Seriously! Who does that?" She whapped him with her shoe again as he started to skitter away on the ice, backwards away from her reach.

"I was calling your name! You weren't listening!" he exclaimed as he sat up carefully, reaching up to touch his head. "Jesus Christ, Meredith… I have another bump on my freaking head now!"

"Good! You deserve it! Are you stalking me or something? Where the hell did you come from?" She exclaimed as she stood up carefully, trying not to let her foot hit the snow, she attempted to slip on her shoe as she stood one footed on the ground, watching him carefully start to stand up, his hand still on his head. She balanced as she lifted her cold foot and started to wobble. He leapt up and grabbed hold of her arm to steady her. She got her shoe on her foot, slammed it down on the ground and wrenched her arm out of his hold. "Thank you!" She exclaimed angrily. "Now if you'll leave me alone! I have to get my daughter to the hospital!" She exclaimed, leaning down to pick Emma up from where she stood staring at the two adults. She grabbed her bags and started walking away from Derek.

"Meredith… the hospital is like twenty blocks from here." Derek said as he followed her down the sidewalk.

"Wait." She said as she stopped in her tracks. She turned sharply, and would have laughed at the way he hopped out of her way if she had any humor left in her soul at all. "Where DID you come from?" She asked as she looked around, noticing an idling car in a driveway, nearly a block away, she glared at him.

"That's my sister. She picked me up at the airport." He said as he pointed to the car. "Adam saw you… while we were driving down the road… how did you get all the way out here?"

"I took a cab." She said indignantly, as she took a step backwards.

"You took a cab into the edge of the city?"

"No! I was trying to take the cab to the hospital, but the stupid moron brought me out here!"

"He dropped you off out here? Meredith… I don't understand…" Derek said as he watched her take another step back.

"There's nothing to understand! We said goodbye! SO GOODBYE!" She exclaimed as tears sprung to her eyes, and she turned around to stomp down the sidewalk. Her foot caught on a patch of ice, and she felt her feet lift out from beneath her. She gripped her daughter tightly, bracing for the impact, when suddenly, she felt two strong arms around her and Emma as he caught her mid-slip. She wanted so badly to struggle. She wanted so badly to fight against his arms, against his catch, against his will. She wanted so badly to struggle, but instead found herself giving in. She was a dead weight in his arms. Her daughter was wrapped securely around her, and he was wrapped securely around them both as he stood, holding her in his arms as she leaned back precariously against him.

"Meredith?" He whispered in her ear. His hot breath slipped across the skin of her outer ear, and cascaded down her wintery cold cheeks, red with fever and windburn. "Meredith?" He whispered, his arms continuing to support them.

"Mama?" Emma's voice squeaked through her mother's silence as she was suddenly jerked into reality.

"Do you want me to drop you?" He whispered, a soft cascade of breath lingered on her skin as she swallowed hard. "Do you want me to drop you… or pick you up, Meredith?" He whispered.

"Pick me up." She whimpered, her eyes closing tightly as she felt herself beginning to crack. She felt herself beginning to fall apart. She felt like a thinly iced lake on a warm winter day, feet slamming at her surface sending webs of cracks over her body, her heart, her soul as she felt her hot tears begin to flow. "Pick me up, please…" She whimpered, as she felt Derek's arms lift, placing her feet firmly on the ground, he continued holding her tightly around her waist for another moment. He held her firmly against him until he was sure that she had her footing, and then for another moment.

Suddenly, another voice broke through the quiet afternoon air, knocking the snowflakes in its path to dust as it traveled so sharply, that it jolted them all to attention.

"Meredith!" Adam's voice shouted, as the door to the car in the driveway swung open. "Meredith!" He screamed again, as Nancy's voice called for the little boy, he paid it no heed whatsoever, and instead took a fully fledged leap from the car, his feet slipping on the ice as he ran as quickly as he could at the three of them. "Meredith!" He exclaimed excitedly as Derek stepped behind her, bracing them all for the impact he knew was coming.

"Watch it, Adam!" Derek exclaimed as suddenly, the boy took a mighty leap, his feet leaving the ground for a moment, as he wrapped his arms around the woman who only moments before had been falling to pieces on the icy sidewalks of Boston. He gripped her tightly and buried himself in her cold embrace as he looked up at her and grinned the brightest grin she had ever seen.

"We found you!" He exclaimed as he looked into his father's eyes. "We found you again!" He said.

And all of the cold, and all of the fear, and all of the anger that had been soaking through her shoes, her skin, her soul, and her heart, melted away instantly, as she looked into the crystal blue eyes of the little boy below her, as he leaned his head down on her again, and squeezed her tightly, as if he were never going to let go.

* * *

Meredith stood in the snowy sidewalk with her arms wrapped around the little boy as he squeezed her tightly. "Meredith, you must come with us!" Adam exclaimed as he pulled himself from her and pointed toward the car. "Aunt Nancy is in the car… you need to meet her! We told her all about you, and she told daddy that she must meet you!" He said as he started to pull her toward the car.

"Adam…" Meredith shook her head. "Adam… I'm trying… sweetheart…" She said as she tried to explain to him that she couldn't go with them. She very carefully lifted Emma to the ground as she tried to get his attention. "Adam, sweetheart…"

"Let's go, Meredith…" he hopped, his happiness was completely shading the concern in her eyes as she glanced to Derek.

"Derek…"

"Would you like a ride?" Derek asked.

"Derek…" She said as she shook her head.

"Come on, Emma…" Adam said, reaching his hand for the little girl. "You can sit with me, and we'll take you to where you gotta go… the car is nice and toasty…" he said, glancing to Meredith, he realized he had the key. "Let's go, Emma… I'll race you…" She said as Emma's eyes lit up.

"Emma…" Meredith said as the little girl's eyes lifted to her mother as she waited for a cue.

"Come on, Emma… I'll race you!" Adam said again.

"Derek…" Meredith whispered as she glanced to Derek.

"Meredith?" Derek whispered.

"I…I…" She muttered.

"I won't drop you off in the middle of a snowbank." He said softly. "And I promise my sister isn't a serial killer… yeah, she's not the best cook in the world… but I don't think she's killed anyone… um… yet." Derek teased. "What do you say, Mer?" he asked softly.

"Derek…" She said as she glanced to her daughter, who was still watching her. "Emma…" Meredith sighed. "Don't slip on the ice when you beat Adam's butt!" She exclaimed as she pointed toward the car. "Run!" She said as the little girl grinned and took off down the sidewalk.

"Oh no!" Adam exclaimed. "Wait up, Emma!" he exclaimed. "Aunt Nancy doesn't even know who you are!" He shouted as Meredith laughed at the little boy's concern.

She turned her head and glanced at Derek as he gave her a tender smile. "Thank you." He whispered as he gave her a sad smile.

"No." She said as she took a deep breath, releasing it slowly. "Thank you." She swallowed as she glanced to the car to see both kids struggling to get into the car.

"Let's go…" he said as he swung her bags into his arms and reached his arm out. "Before they get stuck trying to beat one another into the car." He smiled, as she glanced at his arm for a moment and smiled up into his eyes, before she looped her arm in his, and let him lead her down the sidewalk to the car.

* * *

Derek and Meredith walked toward the car and as they reached the car, he watched as Adam chattered over the seat to his aunt as the door remained wide open. He slowed as they reached the car, and peeked in the door. "I see that you've met Emma." He said as Nancy nodded, watching as the little girl coughed into her hands and sniffled, her seatbelt was already buckled and Adam was sitting happily beside her as he grinned at his father. "Pop open the trunk… I'll put their bags in there…" He said as Nancy nodded. Derek closed the door to keep the cold and conversation out of his sister's hearing range as he led Meredith behind the car when he heard the sound of the trunk opening.

He turned his head toward Meredith as she fidgeted with her fingers, her fingertips were bright red as she twisted them awkwardly. "Are you sure you're okay with this?" he asked as she looked up into his eyes, her hands dropping to her side.

"I don't have much of a choice, do I?" She asked in an almost playful tone, though there was a hint of resentment hiding in her words.

"Not really…" He said as he shrugged, carefully lifting her bags into the trunk.

"So you guys… just saw us walking…"

"Actually… we nearly hit the crazy cab driver as he was pulling out of the driveway of the shelter." Derek admitted in a whisper. She took a step back and he reached forward to take her hand. "There's nothing to be embarrassed about." He said as she seemed to be withdrawing by the second. "Meredith." He said softly as she looked up at him, their eyes meeting as he paused. "It's alright." He said softly.

"It's not alright, Derek." She swallowed. "You shouldn't have to give me a ride… I should be able to handle this myself. I'm not helpless, you know… I'm not weak. I don't need charity, and I don't need someone telling me that I look like I've been beaten. Do I look abused, Derek? Do I really look that bad?" She asked as tears began to form in her eyes.

"You look beautiful." He said honestly, her cold hand was enveloped by his warm palm, the heat was becoming unbearable as she tugged her hand slightly. "I mean it, Meredith." He said as he shrugged and shook his head. "I wish that you believed me. You should really trust me."

"I don't trust anyone, Derek." She whispered as she tugged her hand completely out of his grip. "So are you going to give us a ride to the hospital, or are you going to stand here and make ridiculous remarks about your blindness?" She asked with a playful smile.

Derek smiled playfully and reached for her hand again as he lifted his other hand up and closed the trunk on the car. She stared at his hand for a moment, before he moved his fingers to beckon her hand to be placed in his. "Come on, Meredith." He said with a shrug. "Give a guy an inch?" He asked.

"There are so many ways to reply to that, Derek. None of which would be very flattering to you."

"You're feisty when you're fired up."

"That's right." She nodded. "That should teach you… good and early, Derek." She said as she took his hand as he smiled. "Don't make me angry…"

"You see…" Derek said playfully as he helped her around the car. "The way you say that… 'good and early' … it gives this allusion of the possibility of seeing you again, after we drop you off at the hospital." He said as she shook her head. "You' see… you're not angry now… when would I have the opportunity to make you angry, unless we see one another again?" He asked as she shook her head.

"Are you trying to make it right now?" She teased as Derek grabbed the handle to the back door and opened it for Meredith.

"Most certainly not." He said as he tilted his head.

"Thank you for offering the ride, Derek." Meredith said softly as she climbed into the seat and looked up at his smile. "I appreciate your kindness."

"Thank you for accepting it." He replied as he closed her door behind her, turned and opened the passenger side door, climbed in and buckled up, as he began his round of introductions.

* * *

Nancy was driving while Derek sat a bit sideways in his seat, his eyes on Emma as she leaned against the door and looked back at him. "How are you doing there, princess?"

"I'm okay." She whispered softly as she gave him a delicate smile, her eyes sparkling into his as she coughed a little, her eyes not leaving his.

"Emma is a princess, you know?" Derek said to Nancy, who nodded and gave him a glance. "She is… I asked… she said yes… and come on, how could you doubt that face?" He asked as the little girl giggled from the back seat.

"Nancy…" Meredith said softly as she saw Nancy's eyebrows rise in question from the driver's seat. "I just… thank you for doing this for us, we really appreciate it…"

"There is no problem at all." Nancy said with a smile. "A friend of Derek's is a friend of ours."

"They're my friends too…" Adam said from beside Meredith as he grinned at her.

"Same goes for Adam…" Nancy said with a playful roll of her eyes as they laughed softly. The silence that was filling the gaps of the conversation were awkward and deafening, and Meredith tried to busy herself with watching Emma, so that she wouldn't focus on Derek glancing at her. "Mass. General is fine, right?" Nancy asked as she watched Meredith nod.

"Yes… I mean… I just need to get to a clinic." She said as she nodded her head. "Again… thank you… I know I must be messing with your Christmas plans… Christmas eve is a special time, you shouldn't be dragging strangers around to the…"

"Meredith." Derek interrupted, his voice was soft and she felt the warmth in her cheeks as she lifted her eyes to his. He gave her a tender smile and she watched his head shake slightly. "You're not messing anything up… You're fine… just relax, warm up…" He said as he tilted his head slightly.

"I just…" She sighed softly as she watched him. "I just… you know…" She shrugged.

"I know." He said with a smile as he turned his head and looked out the window as Nancy pulled into the hospital parking lot. "Why don't you pull around there…" He pointed as Nancy nodded. "I'll bring her in… and…"

"Derek, you don't have to bring me in… I am perfectly…"

"So everything's about you?" He said with a playful chuckle. "I was talking about the princess…" He said with a laugh. "I'll grab your bags, and carry her in for you… and I'll show you where the clinic is…"

Meredith paused as she stared into his eyes. He was giving her a kind smile as Nancy pulled to the front of the hospital. She stopped the car and glanced to her brother. "What are you going to do about…"

"Adam?" Derek said as he turned his head and the little boy nodded. "Do you want to stay here with Aunt Nancy, or come with us?"

"I wanna come with you!" He exclaimed as his seatbelt flew off.

Nancy looked to her brother as if to ask him how long he would be, and he unbuckled his seatbelt and smiled. "You can come back and get us later if you want."

"I'll wait." She said as she shooed him along, he climbed from the car and smiled at his sister.

"Thank you, Nance." Derek said as he opened his door and swung around to the back door, opening it for Meredith, he watched her shake her head as he held his hand out to her. She tilted her head and sighed. "Come on…" He said, wiggling his fingers as she smiled. "I'm trying to be a gentleman here."

"You are quite a gentleman…" She said as she grasped his hand, feeling the strength of his grip on her hand as she allowed him to help her out of the car. She stood on the ground as she turned, watching Adam climb to the doorway, he scrambled out and grasped Meredith's hand as they both watched Emma slide to the other side and climb out, her arms lifting as Derek lifted her from the car. He planted a kiss on her fever reddened cheek and closed the door as he walked to the back of the car.

"Derek, you don't have to hold her… I can take her, or she can walk…" Meredith said as she and Adam walked toward the back of the car, following Derek as he opened the trunk and pulled their bags out.

"Nonsense… she's a princess." Derek said as he set their bags on the ground for a second and lifted his hand up, he closed the trunk and bounced a little, sending the little girl into a series of giggles as she gripped him tightly. "I can handle it…" He said as he grabbed their bags, winked at her and nudged her as they walked past them toward the hospital. "Adam… make sure Meredith comes with you…" He said as he grinned.

"Come on, Meredith… let's get going…" He said as he tugged her arm, leading her along as they followed Derek in through the front doors. Derek walked in and looked around, the nurses behind the main counter smiled as he approached them.

"Well look at what dragged its way out of Seattle!" One of the women exclaimed as Derek only smirked, walking close to the counter.

"Hey, girls…" Derek said as he felt Emma turn her head.

"Home for Christmas, I'm assuming?" The nurse asked as she looked to the little girl curiously, and noticed Adam with Meredith as they walked through the door. "Adam…"

"Nurse C, Nurse C!" Adam exclaimed as he pulled Meredith along. "Meredith, this is Nurse C!" He exclaimed as they approached the counter and Meredith smiled politely as they walked closer.

"Well, who is this?" The nurse smiled at Emma as she peeked out at the nurse and then turned and buried her head back in Derek's neck.

"This… is my friend Emma." He said with a nod. "And this is her mama, Meredith… We're looking for a doc to take a look… make sure she's alright, maybe get some antibiotics." He said. "They both have a pretty bad fever, and cough… I just want them to be really well taken care of." He smiled. He turned to Meredith who was watching curiously and he shrugged. "I used to work here." He said as she nodded in acknowledgement, her eyebrows raised for a moment as she smirked at him slightly. She then turned her head as she smiled slightly, shaking her head as she looked around as the elevator door down the hallway opened and several doctors walked out, all quiet and professional as they made their way down the hallway, when Derek noticed Meredith's eyes widen in surprise as she looked at him with a look of fear, mixed with something else. "Meredith?"

"I… I…" She whispered.

"Are you alright?" Derek whispered as her eyes shifted.

"I'm okay." She swallowed as she released Adam's hand. "Sweetie… stay with your daddy, I will be right back." She said as Adam nodded his head and glanced to Derek as Derek watched her kiss Emma quickly, turn sharply and walk in the opposite direction of the doctors as she slipped around the corner and down the hallway toward the bathrooms.

* * *

Derek stood for a moment, surprised by Meredith's quick departure, his mouth was left slightly agape as he glanced to the doctors that were walking toward him. He turned to the nurse and smiled. "Carrie…" He said as she tilted her head, looking up from her paper. "Can you get an exam room ready in the clinic… for Meredith and Emma… when she's done in the restroom, I'll bring them down there…"

"Sounds great, Doctor Shepherd." She said with a nod. "It's really nice to see you again."

"It's nice to see you again, Carrie."

"Yeah, Nurse C… nice to see you…" Adam waved as the nurse smiled and picked up a lollipop from the jar in her office, one for Adam and one for Emma. "Thank you, Nurse C!" He said excitedly as he grabbed the lollipop.

"Thank you." Emma whispered as Derek then turned, nearly running right into someone. She continued to walk and Derek stepped aside quickly before running into her.

"Chief Grey." Derek nodded. "It's nice to see you again."

"Doctor Shepherd?" She said as she turned around to face him as he grabbed his son's hand as Adam moved behind his father's leg. "I thought you left us for another hospital." She said, her voice was cold and angry, and Derek felt as if a breeze had run through the room. He felt Emma's head rest on his shoulder as her hand lifted to rub her sore, sniffly nose.

"I have." He nodded. "I'm here with a friend." He replied. "Her daughter is sick, and she needed to get her to a doctor. I recommended your clinic."

Ellis' eyes flashed to the little girl as she looked at her grey-green eyes, her soft tendrils of blonde hair, and for a moment she could see something familiar about her, some kind of connection to this child. She shook it off as she looked back at Derek. "Our clinic is the best in the city." Ellis said stiffly. "You picked a good place for her to go." Ellis said as she sighed. "Have a good day, Doctor Shepherd." She said coldly.

"Merry Christmas, Chief Grey." Derek said as Ellis made a huffing sound with her voice, turned and walked away without acknowledging Derek's words.

As Ellis disappeared from sight, Derek looked to the clock. He noticed that Meredith had been in the bathroom for quite a long time, and wondered for a moment if she had just abandoned them there. He took a slow deep breath and walked down the hallway toward the woman's room, he glanced around as he put his hand on the door. He pulled his hand back and turned around, looking down at Adam.

Adam stood in front of him, looking up at Derek with a curious expression. His eyes flashed to the bathroom and back to his father. "You want me to go in there?"

"How about if I chase you in there…?" Derek shrugged as he watched a wicked grin across his son's face.

"She's gonna yell at you…" Adam giggled.

"Oh, I'm used to being yelled at… ready?"

"Uh huh…" He nodded. He took a deep breath and gave his father a sideways grin. "YOU CAN'T CATCH ME, DADDY!" He exclaimed as he slammed his hands on the door, and flung it open, sending the little boy running inside.

"Adam! That's the ladies room!" Derek exclaimed, as he listened to Emma giggle. "You're going to give us away…" he whispered to the little girl, as he went running into the bathroom after Adam, with a half smirk on his face as he listened to the little boy squeal in laughter from within the rest room as he followed him inside after Meredith.

* * *

Derek held Emma tightly as they chased Adam into the woman's room, and Derek was very happy to find that no one else was inside. "Adam… You shouldn't be in here…" Derek said as he glanced down the line, noticing that there was only one stall closed and locked.

"Derek?" Meredith's voice echoed off the walls as Derek breathed a sigh of relief that she hadn't disappeared completely.

"Meredith?" Derek asked. "Are you alright?" he said as he turned and locked the latch on the ladies room door as he walked toward the stall she was in. "Adam, don't do that…" Derek said as Adam started to get down to crawl under the stall.

"He's fine… I'm not going to the bathroom." She said as she unlocked the stall and walked out.

"You were hiding." He said as he looked toward the door.

"I was…" She shrugged as she walked toward him. "Not… hiding, I wasn't hiding." She replied as she tried to walk past him, reaching her hands out for Emma. The little girl moved into her mother's arms and looked back at Derek as she cuddled into her mother. "I'm ready to go…" She said as she reached for the door handle.

"No." Derek said as he put his hand on hers delicately, watching her shoot him a glare. "Not until you tell me what's going on."

"Nothing is 'going on', Derek." Meredith said with an irritated tone. Her eyes narrowing as she tried to pull the handle, noting that he had locked the door. "You did your good deed, Derek. Thank you… I'm here, I'm safe… that's all I needed. Thank you." She said as she reached for the lock, only to have him put his hand over it. "Derek, please…" She said as she stared at his hand, feeling the heat rising up in her cheeks as she sighed.

"You were hiding from something." He said as she continued to stare at the lock, and Derek's hand.

"I wasn't hiding from anything." She said. "And if I was, it isn't any of your business." She said as she glared into his eyes. "Now thank you for helping us get to the hospital, but my baby is sick, and I have to get her to a doctor now." She said as she reached to pull his hand from the lock, digging her nails into his skin as she started to pull. "Don't make me yell for help, Derek. I will yell for help." She said as he shook his head.

"You won't yell for help, Meredith, because you don't want help." He said as he gave her a determined glare. "You are trying everything in your power to make sure that you don't get any help whatsoever… well I have news for you, Meredith… the world is a hell of a lot harder for people who don't ask for help… it's a hell of a lot harder for people who don't take what they can get, and it is a hell of a lot harder for people who are trying to do it all alone!" Derek exclaimed as Meredith started to pull on his hand harder, her fingernails were nearly drawing blood as she pulled.

"Let me out of here!" She growled.

"You owe me, Meredith!" Derek exclaimed as suddenly she stopped. He knew it was the wrong thing to say, but he knew it would be the only thing that would keep her from struggling, to keep her from ripping his hand to shreds.

"I don't owe you a damned thing!" She exclaimed as she pushed at his chest with her loose hand, gripping her daughter with her other arm.

"Mommy, don't hit!" Emma exclaimed as Meredith grabbed her bag that Derek had dragged in there with them. She swung it over her shoulder and reached for the lock again.

"I don't owe you a damned thing, let me out of here!" She exclaimed as hit him again, this time harder, he pushed back as he let her go. He watched her flip the lock, and disappear out the door with an angry huff, as she left him standing there.

Derek shoulders slumped as he stood for a moment, watching the door latch behind her as he suddenly realized that someone was tugging at his arm. "Daddy, why are you just standing there?" Adam exclaimed stamping his feet. "Go get her!" He said as Derek scooped his son up and ran out the door after the quickly retreating woman.

"Meredith…. Come here." Derek said as he approached her, trying not to make more of a scene than he already had. "Meredith, please." Derek called as she turned sharply and glared at him, stopping in the hallway, several steps ahead of him. "Please." He said as he tilted his head.

Meredith glared at him as she stood in the hall, glancing to the lobby that she could just as easily run to if she wanted to, and back to Derek again. "Thank you for your kindness, Derek." She said as she wiped a tear from her eye. "But I think we're done here." She swallowed.

"Meredith…" Derek said as he took a step forward, watching her retreat another step, he stopped. "Please?"

"What more do you want from me, Derek? I said thank you… I don't have any money to give you… I don't have anything to give you in return…" She sighed. "What more do you want from me?" She asked as she took a step forward.

"I just want the truth, Meredith." He whispered, taking a step toward her, he lowered his son to the ground, taking his hand.

"The truth? What truth? I told you the truth…" She said softly as she took another step forward. "I'm exhausted, Derek." She whispered. "I've been doing this for days… running… running from things that are there, running from things that aren't there. I'm tired… and I'm sick, and my baby is sick… and I'm tired of running. I'm here, I'm in Boston… and I'm in the hospital… I can take it from here." She said as she coughed slightly. "I can take it from…" She started to cough a little harder as she felt herself trembling slightly, her daughter's weight weighing on her suddenly as she started to feel dizzy. She coughed harder and felt herself starting to tremble harder as she gripped Emma tightly in her embrace as she felt herself starting to tumble forward. She began to lose her grip on Emma as she tumbled forward, her head filling with loud sounds and ringing as she grabbed her head as everything went black, the last thing she heard was the sound of Derek calling for the nurse's help, and his arms wrapping around her as he caught her and Emma before they hit the floor.

* * *

The room sounded hollow, almost empty. The cool air of the room washed over her skin as she felt someone tugging at her arm, her eyes remaining closed as the smells of the room filled her senses. She drifted away, and back again, hovering between awake and sleep. She could smell the sterile smell of the room. Hospitals always smelled this way, faux clean and like band aids. Hospital rooms. Hospital? She took a sharp deep breath, feeling the pressure on her chest, the stinging of her lungs as she tried to open her eyes, a dizziness instead keeping them closed as she listened to the sounds around her.

She heard a man's voice, a woman's voice. She heard a small child's voice, and she remained out of it, the room and it's sounds, smells, contents swirling around her as she lie alone in the bed, in the hospital, alone.

Emma.

Meredith's eyes opened wide as she automatically tried to sit up in her bed, her arm tugged back by something attached to it as she came face to face with a familiar set of eyes as his hands touched her shoulders and gently pushed her back on the bed. "Emma!" She exclaimed. "Where is… where is… Emma?" She breathed erratically as her eyes moved rapidly around the room as Derek talked in a soft, tender voice as he tried to calm her.

"She's right here… she's right here, Meredith… calm down… calm down and lay down…" Derek whispered. "Calm down…" Derek said as her breath wheezed from her lungs as she stared up at him as he touched her cheek, her head resting on her pillow as he gently turned her head. "Turn your head… she's right there…" Derek said as he nodded. Meredith turned her head slightly and saw her daughter sitting on the bed beside her, the little girl's hand was waving slightly as she popped the popsicle from her mouth out.

"Hi, Mama." She said, her voice instantly calming Meredith as she turned her head toward Derek again.

"What am I doing in this bed?" She asked as she tried to get up, only to be stopped by his hands again. "Stop holding me down, I need to get up!"

"No…" Derek shook his head. "You can't get up… you have an IV in… you need fluids… Stop struggling, and let the doctors help you…" He said as she shook her head and continued to try to sit up.

"No… no… I can't be in the hospital… I have to go… I have to take care of my baby, I have to go, I can't be in the hospital… I can't afford the hospital, I can't afford to do this, I… I can't… I have to go… I…" she said as tears began to fall down her cheeks as she tried to grab her IV.

"No." Derek said sternly as he put his hand on her arm, holding the IV in as she stopped. "You need fluids, Meredith." He said, shaking his head. "You have pneumonia… you need fluids."

"I don't have pneumonia… I have a little cold." She said as she wiped the tears from her eyes and looked into his as he watched her tenderly. "I don't have pneumonia… I am okay… I have to go… I can't afford this… I can't…afford this, Derek… stop making me do this…"

"You can't afford to die, either, Meredith." Derek whispered as he watched her lip tremble. "It's alright… you will be alright… we have antibiotics, and fluids… you need food… Emma said she can't remember the last time you ate." Derek shrugged.

"Emma is four years old, Derek… she can't remember the last time she went to the bathroom." She said sarcastically as she sniffled.

"Alright… that's enough sarcasm… just relax… just rest… rest and relax…"

"But Derek…" Meredith sniffled. "I…I…Emma… is she okay? Is my baby okay?" She asked as she looked over at the little girl, who waved and wiggled her fingers at her mother again, sliding the popsicle from her lips with a popping sound.

"Mmm… popsicle, Mama." Emma said as she tilted her head.

"She has a cold, Meredith. It was the starts of pneumonia, but she's on some antibiotics. She had a little Tylenol, and a popsicle, and she's feeling a lot better. We're more worried about you." Derek whispered.

"I have to get out of here, Derek." She whimpered. "If they find out I'm in the hospital, they'll take her from me. They'll say I can't take care of her, Derek and they'll take her from me." Meredith started to panic, she started to sit up and Derek put his hand on her shoulder very lightly.

"No one is going to take her, no one is going to find out you're here… Meredith… relax." Derek whispered. "You're safe… you're not running anymore, you're safe, you're with me… no one is going to take Emma."

"But if they find out I'm sick…Derek. If they find out…"

"Meredith, stop… please…" He whispered as he ran his fingers through her hair delicately. "Just stop… you're alright." He whispered. "If you don't rest, and you don't take the fluids and the antibiotics, you're going to be worse than sick, you're going to be dead… and that's not going to do anyone any good." Derek said softly as he reached for her hand. He grasped it in his tightly and squeezed it. "No one is going to take her… you need to rest…"

"What happened?" She whispered, her voice was raspy and her head was pounding. She felt dizzy and confused as she swallowed hard, feeling the soreness in her throat as she breathed in slowly.

"You passed out." Derek whispered. "Between exhaustion, and starvation, and dehydration… we're lucky you woke up." He whispered.

Meredith looked around the room and her eyes flashed upon the window, noticing that it was now dark outside. Her head snapped in Derek's direction. "It's dark outside…" She said, her voice mildly panicked as she swallowed. "How long was I out? What time is it? Why didn't you go? You're missing Christmas with your family… why are you still here?" She whispered as she watched Derek's head tilt slightly as he watched her.

"It is about eight o'clock." He said softly as he very carefully ran his thumb over her hand as he watched her eyes. "You passed out… and we took care of you…" He said softly. "It's as simple as that. We got a doctor in here, and we had Emma looked at… and she needed to be here with you." Derek whispered. "I sent Adam home with Nancy, Meredith… he's having his Christmas eve with his Aunt Nancy and Uncle Bill… and all of his cousins… but there was no way that I was going to let you wake up, and not have your little girl right next to you." He replied.

"You should be with Adam." She whispered.

"Oh, Adam will be here in the morning…He's a tough kid… he was more worried about you than he was Christmas." He said softly.

"Derek…" She shook her head as she coughed slightly, rolling her head on the pillow as a tear began to roll down her cheek. "Why are you doing this for me, Derek?

"Because… you… are doing everything you can to fight against me." He replied. "Because you're feisty, and beautiful, and strong. Because you're trying so very hard to prove to everyone that you can do everything for yourself, when you know deep down in your heart that you can't." He sighed. "But most of all… because you remind me of myself." He said softly. "When Anna first died… I was up every night with Adam… I was super dad… I worked and played with him… I slept maybe… two hours a night for months… I hardly ever ate, I hardly ever did anything other than be with Adam and work." Derek said softly. "Finally… I got sick… I wore myself into the ground, and I got sick… and I couldn't be with Adam… and I couldn't be at work… and I was stuck in a stupid bed for weeks… alone…" Derek said as he watched her swallow, her eyes were red and tired, her lips dry and cracked as her eyes moved to the little girl with the sticky fingers as she finished off her popsicle.

"Can I have my baby?" She whispered as she slipped her lower lip out as it trembled slightly.

"Of course." He said softly. "Emma?" Derek said as the little girl lifted her hand up with the popsicle stick.

"Mm… good, Mommy!" She said excitedly.

Derek smiled as he turned and stood up, taking the popsicle stick from the little girl, he tossed it in the trash as he lifted the little girl from the bed. He turned her around quickly as she giggled from his arms. "Derek, careful!" She giggled as Derek lifted her into his arms and walked toward Meredith's bed. He walked around the bed and gently lifted the little girl on the side without the IV. He watched the little girl crawl into the bed with her mother, wrapping her arm around her mother tightly as she kissed Meredith's cheek. "I love you, Mommy." She whispered softly as she snuggled into her mother.

"I love you, baby…" She whispered back as she let her tears fall slowly.

"I love Derek too." She whispered as she closed her eyes and cuddled against her mother, as Meredith kissed her head as she turned her head slightly and let her eyes meet Derek's as he watched Mother and daughter together.

"He's not so bad…" Meredith whispered with a soft smile to Derek, as he watched the two of them lie together on the bed. "Thank you." She whispered, as she kissed her daughter's head once again, though her eyes never left Derek's.

* * *

Sleep had soon enveloped Meredith in its warm, wooly cocoon. She found her mind in beautiful places; the warmth and tenderness of the man who was watching over her sent her mind into the safest, most comfortable place that she had been in, in a very long time. Her mind drifted to happier times, to laughter and warmth of her family. To a time when her little girl was giggling and happy, a time when her husband's soft, tender voice could fill her senses in a way that nothing else could.

She rested and dreamed, feeling the fever diminish slowly, eventually breaking during the night. She woke once or twice, no panic in sight, but with her daughter by her side, and the soft glow of the bedside lamp lighting the man on a sleepy watch in the chair beside the bed. He sat awkwardly crooked, his head resting on an extra pillow, his hand stretched out as it enveloped hers, keeping it warm, and ensuring that any movement would rouse him from his slumber so that he could dote on her wants and desires.

She carefully slid her hand from his, noting that despite his plan, he did not move or stir at all, but remained asleep, deeply asleep as his nose wiggled slightly in his sleep, bringing a slow smile to her face as she watched him sleep. She watched him for several moments and she openly wondered about him. She wondered how such a caring, handsome man could have remained available for so long after his wife had died, though she paused her thoughts knowing the extent of the pain that he had to be feeling, the thought that if he were happy, it may be seen as a betrayal of his love for his wife. He had a son, a wonderful little boy who seemed to live and breathe by his father's word, so charming and well behaved, their relationship was unmatched. She stared at his hand as it lay delicately and still on the bed, as she turned her head to look up, catching her breath slightly when she noticed he was watching her.

"You know." His voice was soft and tender, his words rolling from his tongue as a slight smirk played at his lips. "There's nothing in your IV… I just hooked it up to you so you couldn't escape." He whispered as she smiled and gave him an incredulous look.

"Really?" She said in a teasing tone, her eyes sparkling as she watched him lean forward slightly, stretching his back as he yawned.

"Yep…" he said softly.

"So holding my hand… while you sleep, that's how you make sure I don't disappear?" She asked as he nodded.

"So you don't disappear without me… I've invested in you… so you're a commodity of mine." He said as she laughed slightly, her eyes sparkling in the light of the lamp as she leaned her head on the pillow. "How are you feeling?"

"Hungry." She whispered as she sighed. "Too bad this place doesn't have room service." She said as she gave him a sideways glance as he leaned forward slightly.

"You want something to eat?" He asked, watching her nod her head delicately as he looked at his watch, he sat up straight and yawned again. "Let me see what I can do." He said as he stood up.

"Derek…" She said with a slight giggle as he turned around and looked back at her, he tilted his head. "You don't have to… I was just… thinking out loud… it's not a big deal." He said as he shook his head.

"Nonsense… you're hungry… hang on…" He said as he took a step out of the room for a moment, the door slowly closing and latching behind him.

She shook her head and smiled to herself as she listened to the sound of his voice outside of the room. He sounded sweet and sincere, and he then heard the nurse's voice, and then his voice again, as he thanked the nurse, turned and opened the door. He stepped in and smiled as he stretched. "She'll have something in for us in a minute…" He said with his eyebrows raised. "See that… I'm good." He said as he watched her roll her eyes.

"What did you have to promise her?" Meredith teased as Derek laughed.

"I told her that I'd give you a sponge bath so she wouldn't have to…" He said as he wiggled his eyebrows, making her laugh. "Oh, you think I'm joking!" he teased as she laughed a little harder as she started to cough slightly, her body shifting as she coughed, shifting Emma in her arms as the little girl looked up and yawned.

"Oh… poor thing, sorry, baby…." Meredith whispered as she kissed her daughter's head, the tired eyes of her little girl looking up at her for a moment.

"Here…" Derek said as he reached for the little girl. "Let me put her over there in her own bed…" He whispered. "That way you can both get some solid sleep, not worry about waking one another up." He bent over Meredith, leaned down and lifted the little girl from the bed, pulling her quickly into his body as she curled within it, her lips moving as she made tiny sleep sounds that melted his heart. He kissed her softly and turned toward the other bed, and Meredith watched as he held her to him with one arm and very delicately pulled the covers away with his other hand, settling her within the bed, he covered her with the light hospital blanket with a tender kiss to her forehead, and very quickly plucked her doll from Meredith's bed and tucked it beside her, where it was quickly swallowed by the little girl's arms, a soft, tender smile on her face as her thumb found its path to her lips and snuck between them, as her long eye lashes hid her beautiful grey-green eyes from view, as she fell back to sleep just as quickly as she had been roused. Derek turned toward his chair between the two beds, and immediately noticed that Meredith was watching him the entire time.

"You are good…" She whispered as she coughed slightly, her eyes closing tightly as she tried her best to stave off the sore throat. "You see what you did to me?" She whispered. "You made me weak…" She whispered.

"What are you talking about?" He asked with a humored expression, leaning closer to her so that his voice wouldn't interrupt the sleeping child across from them.

"Weak… you made me weak… I was doing fine on my own… running on empty, and you come along and you find me a comfortable bed and blankets and clean, dry clothes… and food… Derek, you found me food… and water…" She babbled as he watched her with a humored expression. "What are you smirking at?" She asked as he chuckled slightly.

"Nothing…" He shook his head. "Just… your amazement at someone being nice to you." He replied. "You're a beautiful young woman… you seem to have good sense… why on earth are you traveling across the country with ten dollars in your pocket and no food in your stomach?" He watched her swallow hard, her eyes shifting slightly as she sighed. "You don't have to lie to me, you know. I figured out pretty quickly that those bags at the airport weren't yours. You made me worry."

"Derek…" She swallowed. "I…"

"What else did you lie to me about?" He asked as he tilted his head. His voice wasn't accusing, it was knowing, and she knew that he wasn't being rude or intrusive. He was asking for an explanation, and the more she stared into his eyes, the more she wanted to tell him, but she didn't know him, she didn't really know him, so there was no reason for her to burden him with her issues and worries, there is no point in him knowing why she was… "You don't have to think of excuses, Meredith." He shrugged. "You could tell me the truth."

"I don't know what truth you want." She whispered. "What truth do you think you are owed?"

"What are you running from, Meredith?" He asked.

He watched the pain in her face at his question, the way that she seemed to retreat from him, at his question and he remained strong and stoic, and persistent in the way that he watched her. "Derek…"

"I mean… if it's personal, and you don't want to share, that's fine." He said softly. "But if… you're in some kind of trouble… or if you're worried about losing Emma… I can try to help. You love her very much, and you take very good care of her, Meredith… I don't want you to…"

"I'm not… really in danger of losing her." Meredith whispered. "I don't…think." She whispered. "When Rick and I were married… I was still in school." She whispered. "I was in college, finishing my senior year… here, in Boston. I fell in love, and became pregnant… and we married against my mother's wishes." Meredith whispered. "Rick was in a similar situation, but… with the tension between him and his family, and me and my mother… we left before the baby was born… and married somewhere else. I was an adult, I could make adult decisions… and now I was a mother and an adult…" Meredith said as she cleared her throat. "I started medical school… about a year after Emma was born… and it was tough, but I was getting through it…and um… then when Rick died… I needed to become a full time mother…not to mention that I couldn't support myself and Emma, and go to school, and work at the same time… and as I said before… Rick was in a coma for almost a month." She swallowed as she talked, her eyes were filling with tears, and Derek's hand had never left hers as he listened to her story. "I'm sorry." She whimpered as she wiped her tear.

"No… no, it's alright…" He whispered with a tender smile as he turned and grabbed a box of tissues from the table behind him. "I'm sorry they're scratchy…" He said with a slight chuckle as she smiled a little through the tissue, her eyes continuing to water as she dabbed her eyes, and lean her head back on the pillow as she watched his eyes. It wasn't necessarily the fact that she was talking to someone about all of this, or that she was admitting her fears and sadness that was making her cry, it was the fact that his eyes too were filling with tears at her story, his smile was just as sad as hers, his body language was speaking volumes at the way her story was affecting him, and he was trying so hard to hide it from her. He was trying so hard to remain strong for her as she continued her story. "Go on…" He whispered, nodding toward her as she wiped her eye again and sniffled. She stared at the tissue for a moment as she continued her story.

"Rick's family… didn't really like me that much… obviously… because you know… I stole their son away from them and forced him into marriage…" She said slightly sarcastically as Derek nodded, understanding that she was only being flippant and not truthful, she was upset, and he was invested in the story. "And … my mother had long since disowned me… from the moment I told her I was pregnant… She kicked me out of the house, and told me I was worthless, and that she never wanted to see me again." Meredith whimpered. "That hasn't changed, by the way." Meredith sniffled. She watched as Derek nodded. "When Rick died… when he… was… gone, completely gone… his mother was there too." Meredith whispered. "And she looked me in the eyes… and she said… 'Meredith'…" She whispered as she stared across the room at nothing as she remembered the woman's words. "She said… 'Meredith… you will never be half the mother to your child as I was to my son. As God is my witness… I will make it so that you don't even get the chance to try.' She said that… and she walked out of the room." Meredith whimpered. She refused to look at Derek as she continued, knowing if she did, the kindness in his eyes would break her, and she needed to finish. "I spent… a couple of weeks after Rick's death… making plans and making arrangements. I took leave from school, I was fired from my job… and all of our savings went into the funeral." She sighed. "He had a small insurance policy… but… it wasn't enough to cover much more than food and utilities." She whispered. "Then the phone calls came…" She whispered as she did finally lift her head to Derek. "His mother, his father… his sister… calling me on the phone… demanding to see Emma. They called me a murderer." She whimpered. "They called me a hateful, soul sucking, murderer…" She said as her lip protruded and she closed her eyes tightly. She could feel Derek's hand in hers, firm and strong as he squeezed her hand tightly, his other hand moving to her arm as he very delicately ran his hand across her arm and whispered soothingly. "I didn't kill him, Derek." She whimpered as she looked him in the eyes. "I am not a murderer, am I?"

"You know that you're not." He whispered. "You know deep down inside your heart, you did what you needed to do." Derek replied. "You were brave… and you were… tender… and you were thoughtful in your decision." He whispered.

"I didn't want him to suffer, Derek." She whispered. "They said he'd never wake up… there was no brain activity… nothing… there was nothing they could do."

"Can I tell you a secret?" He whispered as she nodded her head tenderly. He closed his eyes for a moment as he took a very slow, very deliberate deep breath as he opened them again, his eyes on hers as he looked into her eyes. "The day… that Anna died." He said softly. "I mean… it was… she was… she had been sick for a very long time." Derek said as he tried to speak without too much emotion, this story having been something that he hadn't even told his therapist, he was finding it hard to find the exact words to convey it. "In the days… up to her death…" He said as he looked her straight in the eyes. "She had been getting worse and worse…and… she had been finding it more and more difficult to speak… she was on respirators and all kinds of machines that were… keeping her alive… you know?" He said as he avoided her eyes for a moment, finding them again after a second, his mind obviously focused on communicating his story as he tapped his fingers slightly in her hand.

"She…was becoming weaker… and they said… that there was going to be this point… they, being her doctors… of course… They said that there was going to be this point… where… she was going to fall asleep… you know, she was just going to fall asleep, and she wasn't going to come back." He said as he choked slightly at the memory, he felt her hand grip his tightly as he spoke, his eyes lifting immediately to hers. "So when… they told me this… I was just absolutely devastated, you know? I was just… how will I know that the last time she goes to sleep is going to be the last time that I see her… you know?" He whispered. He watched Meredith nod tenderly as he watched her. "So… as she became weaker, and sicker… she was sleeping a lot more, you know? And… I had Adam with me… I always had Adam with me… he was always, always there… I didn't care what the doctors had told me… he needed to be with his mother. I needed to be with her… and I held him to her… and put him in her arms on that morning… I… just knew it was going to be the last morning that her eyes were going to be open. I knew… somehow deep in my heart, that this was the last time." He said as he let the tears roll down his cheeks, as he told her the story, Meredith's thumb was rolling across his skin as he spoke, her touch seemingly calming for him as he spoke. "And… I felt her pull him into her slightly, her nose brushing against his soft, delicate black hair, her eyes closed as she relaxed, her whole body relaxed, and in that split second, Meredith…"

"She was gone…" Meredith whispered, her voice was broken and she watched as his eyes met her with a surprisingly hopeful glance.

"She was gone…" He repeated as he took a slow, deep breath. "But she was still with me." Derek whispered as he squeezed her hand. "She is in Adam… in my heart… my memory… and I didn't want her to suffer… I didn't want her to die… and you know… if you wanted to take your mother in law's perspective… I could be perceived as being a murderer… you know? Allowing her to carry my child for months. That could be perceived as torture… only to have her die in the end? Only to lose the one person that made my heart soar above the clouds…" Derek said as he leaned closely, taking her hand firmly in his palm as he leaned in to look her in the eyes. "You're not a murderer, Meredith… I'm not a murderer… and if getting your child as far away from the people that claim that you are… is how you protect her from the evils of this world, then you Meredith, are one of the best mothers that ever lived. You are her protector… her livelihood… her guide."

"Then why am I here?" She whispered. "Why did I travel halfway across the country to a place where I am not wanted, and I have no life, Derek?" She whispered.

"That is one question that I can't answer, Meredith." Derek said as he looked up as the door opened and the nurse walked inside. "You have to be the person in charge of your own destiny… and you have to make decisions that are good for you, and good for Emma…" He said as he took the trays from the nurse at the door and smiled at her, nodding his thanks, he walked over to her bed and pulled one of the rolling trays over to the bed and placed it in front of Meredith as she set her bed up a little more. He pulled the second tray over and reached, lifting the covers from both.

"I'm going to start by giving you the mashed potatoes." She said as she looked up into his eyes. "Ick." She said with a hopeful smile.

"Good start…" Derek said with a tender smile, as they pushed their deeper conversation aside for a moment, as they dug into their midnight snack.

* * *

Meredith and Derek were both fairly quiet while they ate their meals, she giggled when he reached across and scooped the mashed potatoes from her tray and plopped them down on his, and he gave her a slight smirk as he took a spoonful of them and shoved them into his mouth, making a face as if he was eating something horribly disgusting.

"They're not that bad once you get used to them…" he said, sticking his tongue out in a disgusted way, as she giggled.

"I'm so hungry, I might have eaten them…" She said as she put another forkful of food in her mouth and shook her head vehemently when he offered a spoonful of the mashed potatoes to her. "I said 'might'…" She said, pointing the fork at him as he laughed. "I'm not drugged up enough…" She said with a laugh. She ate the rest of her meal, swallowing every bit on her plate as watched him finish his meal, a smirk here and there as he covered their trays again and rolled the tables to the side. "You look tired." She whispered as he smiled and nodded.

"I am… I am quite tired." He said as he watched her lay her head on the pillow, and pull her blanket up slightly.

"I…don't like the thought of you having to sit on that chair all night." She said as she watched him smile at her as he shook his head. "You don't have to…"

"I'm staying." He said with a nod of his head as his eyebrows raised.

"I wasn't asking you to leave." She said as she shrugged, and watched a slightly confused look slide over his features. "I was going to say… that you don't have to sleep on the chair… if you don't want to…" She shrugged, her eyes drooping sleepily as she smirked at him.

"Then where would I sleep?" he asked as he tilted his head and watched her close her eyes as she moved the blanket to block her face and blushing cheeks.

"You can sleep next to me…" She whispered as he chuckled.

"What was that?" he asked, his voice obviously humored by her invitation as she kept the blanket covering her face. "Meredith? I don't think I heard you quite right… what was it you said?" He asked as she peeked out from under the blanket.

"Shut up and take your shoes off… slide into the bed next to me… because if you're not careful, I may sneak out of this room if you don't hold me." She said. "I could disappear…" She said as she watched him stand up quickly and kick his shoes off.

"I wouldn't want that to happen." He said as he moved around the other side of her bed as she turned and watched him glance at the small bit of room she had for him. "I should go get a…"

"You can borrow my pillow…" She said as she watched him shake his head. "I am very good at sharing." She nodded as he smirked and shook his head.

"I'm only doing this so you don't disappear." He said, as she nodded and giggled slightly.

"Right…" She said as she felt him sit on the bed, his legs lifting as he lay his head on the pillow. She noticed that his nose had dipped into her hair as she reached her hand around to grab for his arm. He very gently gave her his arm, and she pulled it around her snuggly as she sighed at the sound of his slight groan. "Now you have me…" She whispered. "That means I can't disappear." She said softly as she felt him nod his head. She felt him cuddle into her as she melted into his arms and closed her eyes for a moment, she thought of something she wanted to tell Derek and she whispered his name. "Derek?" She whispered delicately, her voice floating in the air for a moment as she realized that he was already asleep, his arm around her securely, his nose buried in her hair, and he had fallen asleep as soon as his head hit the pillow. "Sweet Dreams, Derek." She whispered, as she closed her eyes, and reached her hand down to hold his, as she too drifted off into a restful slumber.

* * *

The first thing that Meredith noticed when she woke up, was that the strong arms that had been around her through the night were missing. She felt strangely cold, alone and slightly anxious as she lie in the bed with her eyes closed, the blanket pulled up over her shoulder, the itchy pillow beneath her cheek, when she suddenly heard his voice as delicate as a soft wind float into her ears.

"He sprang to his sleigh, to his team gave a whistle… And away they all flew like the down of a thistle." He said softly, the inflection of his voice was playful and sweet as he paused.

"What's that?" Emma's voice twittered through the room, tickling Meredith's eardrum as she felt herself smile slightly, her eyes still closed as she listened to her curious daughter's question, so happy and relieved that she was awake, talking, her tiny giggle resonated through Meredith's soul as she listened carefully.

"What is what?" Derek asked, his voice humored by the little girl's question.

"Thithle… thith… That thing you said…" She said as she pointed at Derek, her light eyes meeting his as she tried to say the word, smiling at the happiness in his eyes.

"Thistle?" He asked. "Thistle is a type of flower… and…"

"What color is the flower, Derek?" She asked as she tilted her head. "Is it pretty…?"

"It's kind of um… prickly… but the soft part at the top… is called down… so it's really soft… like… your doll's hair, or your teddy bear's fur." He explained as she nodded her head. "More story…" She said as she giggled.

Meredith's eyes opened, her head turning as she watched Derek sitting in the chair beside her bed. He was positively engrossed in the book in front of him, as her daughter sat nestled in his lap, her blonde hair messy and matted slightly as she scratched her head with her tiny hand, her eyes lifting to meet Derek's as she watched him lift the book slightly to continue the story.

"But I heard him exclaim… as he drove out of sight…" Derek said softly, as he began to turn the page.

"HAPPY CHRISTMAS TO ALL! AND TO ALL A GOODNIGHT!" Emma exclaimed excitedly as Derek laughed, putting his finger to his lips as he shushed her gently, listening to her giggle as he gently closed the book.

"I thought you said you never heard that story before…" Derek teased as the little girl giggled in his arms, her head leaning back as he tickled her and her mouth opened wide as she laughed a loud laugh.

"I didn't want to hurt your feelings, Derek." She giggled as Derek laughed and tickled her, listening to the infectious laugh as it filled his heart and mind, both of their eyes falling upon Meredith as she lie watching the two of them laughing together, a small smile on her face as Emma raised her hand and waved. "Hi, Mama." She said as she giggled. "Sorry we waked you up." She said as Meredith smiled.

"It's okay." She whispered as she watched her little girl slide from Derek's lap.

"Sorry we waked you." Derek said as he tilted his head and watched the little girl scramble onto the bed, he leaned forward and helped her up, as he set the book in his hands on the table beside him. "Merry Christmas." He said softly as he watched Meredith wrap her arm around her little girl as she shimmied herself up her mother, kissing her mother's cheek.

"Merry Christmas to both of you…" She said softly as she kissed her little girl softly and turned her head back toward Derek.

"Derek was reading me a story… when we waited for you to wake up, Mommy. It was about Santa… he rose such a clatter and they didn't know what was the going on!" She exclaimed with a silly giggle as Derek laughed.

"She changes the words to stories…" Derek teased as Meredith laughed.

"It's a habit she can't break, I'm afraid…" Meredith teased. "She's been doing it for years…" She said softly as Emma settled in her mother's arms and they all became quiet with their own thoughts, the awkwardness level rising slowly as Derek pulled a clipboard from the table beside him. "What is that, my will?" She asked slightly as Derek chuckled.

"Discharge papers." He said softly as he shrugged slightly, watching her smile disappear slightly. "You need to fill out the medical history part… the contact information and stuff…" he said as he watched her push the button for the bed to help her sit up, she repositioned herself on the bed and glanced to Derek. "Really, it's just my sneaky way of getting your phone number and knowing what diseases you might have." He said with a playful smirk as she smiled back at him.

"I see how it is…" She nodded. "You drug me up, force me into bed… and now you're throwing me out on the street?" She said as she took the clipboard from him and began to fill out her name and information.

"That's right." Derek said as he smiled, watching her face turn serious as she wrote her information down, he noticed that she had become very quiet as she wrote. "Meredith." Derek said softly as he watched her eyes lift to his as she looked at him for a moment. "My offer still stands." He said, shrugging. "I mean… for Christmas. I was only kind of joking when I invited you and Emma along… I'd really like it if you would join us."

"I really can't Derek." She said softly as she watched his eyes ask her again. "I do appreciate the offer though." She said softly. She looked up as Derek tilted his head and watched her. "Derek… thank you… really… for everything." She smiled. "But it's not up to you to rescue me. I got myself into this situation… I should be able to get myself out." She whispered. "You got me through this far…some sleep, some food… I appreciate it, but you have your son and your family that you have to worry about. I'm at a hospital… I'm safe… thank you." She whispered as he watched her eyes.

"Where are you going to go?" He asked as he watched her sign her name at the bottom of her paperwork.

"I'm not sure…" She said softly. "But… have a couple of people here in Boston that I can call." She said with a shrug. "I haven't talked to them in a few years, but they don't hate me… and I can always try my mother… But it doesn't matter, it's not your concern… go on…" She said softly. "I have to deal with this hospital bill, and…"

"Your bill has been taken care of." Derek replied as he watched her eyes widen. "Don't look at me like that, you owe me." He said as he pointed at her and watched her shake her head. "You threw a shoe… at my head! I could have been severely injured… and then the slinky thing… I got you a slinky for Christmas… and I haven't even seen you play with it yet…" He argued before she could say anything else. "And then… then, you kicked me! You kicked me and I fell on the ice… you owe me, Meredith…" He said with a smirk and a wink as he watched her mouth open and close several times as she tried to retort. "You look like a fish when you do that."

"You look like a… like a…"

"See, if the insult doesn't come naturally, it wasn't meant to be." Derek teased as he smiled as Meredith tried to look shocked, though her smirk was quickly deceiving you. "I am going to… take your paperwork to the desk…" He said as he leaned forward and grabbed the clipboard. "The nurse is going to come in here to take out your IV… your bag is over there, and you can get dressed." Derek shrugged. "I will beg you more to come to Christmas with me when you come out of the room." Derek said as he nodded and stood up.

"Derek, I can't come to Christmas with you." Meredith said as Derek ignored her as he walked toward the door.

"Bye Emma bear…" Derek said as he waved. The little girl waved back at him and giggled. "Think about it." He said as he opened the door.

"I already thought about it!" She exclaimed as he walked out of the door mid sentence. "I said no…" She mumbled as she sighed, looking down at her little girl as she smirked back at her mother. "He's a stubborn, stubborn man." She whispered as Emma nodded. "You don't even know what I'm talking about, do you?" She said as her daughter shook her head. "You'll learn…" Meredith nodded with a slight smile as the door opened and the nurse entered the room, ready to help discharge Meredith.

* * *

Derek waited patiently outside the room, when his thoughts were interrupted by the sound of two small pounding feet as the screeched across the floor. He turned his head to see Adam coming right for him, and Nancy quick on his heels as she watched the smile appear on Derek's face, his eyes lighting up at the sight of his little boy. "Daddy, daddy, daddy!" Adam exclaimed as Derek stood up and caught his son in mid air as he leapt into his arms. "Merry Christmas!" He exclaimed as he kissed Derek on the cheek, his grin was bright and happy as he kissed Derek on the cheek again, leaning back , he looked into his eyes. "Where's Meredith?" He asked as he tilted his head and watched Derek nod toward the room.

"She's in that room… she'll be out in a minute…" He said as Nancy caught up with her nephew and breathed a sigh as Derek looked to her and sighed. "Hey… Thank you for watching him last night…"

"You know it's not a problem…" She said as she gave him a friendly smile and watched as Adam watched the door carefully. "Nick and the kids are in the car… we're just waiting for you." She said as he nodded and smiled. "Did you ask Meredith if she and Emma would like to join us?"

"I did." Derek nodded as he watched the door with his son. "She said she'd think about it." Derek replied as he shrugged.

"Awesome!" Adam exclaimed as he slipped from his father's grip, to the floor as Derek glanced to the nurse.

"Doctor Shepherd?" She said softly as she tilted her head. "Meredith McKennon already has a file here." She said as she watched Derek tilt his head.

"You're sure it's her?" He asked as he walked to the counter and looked at the screen.

"Yes, sir." She said as she glanced up at him. "Same social security number." Her… emergency contact is… Ellis Grey."

"Ellis Grey?" Derek said as he straightened his stance and gave her a strange look.

"Yes… relationship… mother." She said, looking up at Derek.

"What?" Derek asked as he leaned in and turned the screen. Sure enough, he read what the nurse had told him. He turned his head toward Nancy, and then to Adam as the door to the room opened.

Meredith walked out clothed with her bag over her shoulder. Emma was dressed and bundled up as she waved to Derek.

"Meredith!" Adam exclaimed as he ran toward her and wrapped his arms around her, hugging her tightly as he grinned up at her. "I am so glad you're okay! Daddy fixed you up, didn't he? He fixed you up and you feel all better now…"

Meredith smiled at the little boy, touching his forehead softly with her fingertips as she as she smiled at him. "Adam, Adam, Adam…" She smiled as he hopped a little. "Merry Christmas." She said softly.

"Merry Christmas to you! Merry Christmas to you, Meredith…" He said excitedly as Emma reached forward and pulled on his arm slightly.

"Will you get off my mommy, please?" She said as Adam scowled at her.

"Didn't your daddy ever teach you how to share?" Adam asked with a frustrated pout as he watched Emma react to his words. He had no idea how deeply he had hurt her feelings, until tears started to roll down her cheeks and her lip trembled.

"Adam, that's not nice!" Derek said as he saw the little girl starting to cry, having heard what Adam had said. He knew that Adam didn't understand his actions, or the trigger of the little girl's tears, so he reached over and grabbed his hand, tugging him from Meredith as Emma pushed her face into Meredith's leg as Meredith glanced to Adam and back to Emma as she tried to figure out what to do.

"Derek… I mean… Adam, It's alright… it's okay…" Meredith said as she reached down and lifted the little girl into her arms, letting her push her head into her shoulder as she cried.

"I'm sorry." Derek said sincerely. "I'm really sorry." He said as he reached his hand for Emma's hand. "I'm sorry, sweetheart…"

"It's alright, Derek…" Meredith said softly. "She's okay…" She said as she turned and watched the concern on his face as he watched the little girl whimper into her mother's shoulder.

"How are you feeling?" Derek asked as she looked down at Adam and held her hand to him to let him know that it was alright, that she wasn't upset with him. The little boy latched onto her hand and squeezed it, smiling up at her as he brought it to his lips and kissed it.

"I'm feeling… sick…" She shrugged, her voice sounding slightly congested as she released the little boy's hand as he hugged her, pulling a tissue from her pocket, she rubbed her reddened nose as she watched him carefully. "Good morning, Nancy." Meredith said softly as she smiled.

"It's good to see you up and about…" Nancy said softly. "You look like you're feeling much better."

"I am…" She nodded as she turned her head toward Derek. "But not well enough to go to Christmas with your family, I'm afraid." She said with a slight shake of her head. Derek suddenly took her arm and started to pull her down the hallway a little as she walked with Adam holding her tightly, and Emma securely in her arms as Nancy leaned against the wall and sighed as she watched her brother nearly beg this stranger to go to Christmas with them.

"But Meredith… I…"

"I know." Meredith said softly as she stopped him from pulling her, she turned to face him, her hand moving down to touch the little boy's head. "I know you have your speech all ready, and you have this plan that you're going to rescue me from whatever evils that sneak up on me, Derek… but I have this under control now." She said softly. "I think I can handle this…" She nodded.

"Meredith… I just…" Derek said as she shook her head. He paused as she continued.

"I am sorry that I've kept you from your plans… and I think that Emma and I have caused enough trouble for you and your family…" She said, holding her hand up to stop him from interrupting her again. "I know… I know you're going to say that it wasn't any trouble, and that you didn't mind… and that you were just helping me… and I appreciate your help." She said as she nodded. "I do appreciate it very much." She said as she wiped her nose again. "But I really need to do this." She whispered. "I need to do this on my own. I need to do this on my own, because if I don't… then I will have to admit to myself that I couldn't do it."

"Where are you going to go?" Derek whispered as he watched her eyes carefully, trying to see if they would give away any clue as to her thoughts. "Where are you going to go?"

"Well… for one thing… I can start with going to my mother." She said as she shrugged.

"And if that doesn't work?" Derek asked, knowing Ellis Grey's stubbornness, he couldn't even begin to know what kind of life she had to endure under her care.

"If that doesn't work, then I have other friends here in Boston that I can call on… people that I haven't seen in years, but at least I'm on the right side of the country to call them for help, right?" She asked as she took his hand. "Derek… I do need to do this…" She whispered. "I need to do this for myself… for Emma… I need to do this, Derek."

"I don't like not knowing if you're safe." He whispered. "You are still sick… Emma is sick… it's cold outside, Meredith."

"But it's warm here…I am alright, Derek, I promise you…" She said softly as Derek sighed.

"Meredith, I just…"

"Doctor Shepherd?" The voice that interrupted him was enough to send a shiver down his spine. He knew that voice, and he knew better than you make a smart ass comment to that voice. He turned sharply and came face to face with Ellis Grey.

"Doctor Grey?" He said, his voice was irritated and almost harsh as he spat her name from his lips. When he had worked for her, he had never really liked her, and she was one of the main reasons that he had left Massachusetts General for another hospital. However, learning just the brief history of what she put her own daughter through in her pursuit of happiness, and he was genuinely unhappy with her presence.

"If Mrs. McKennon has declined your offer, it is only polite to respect her wishes." She said as she pushed her nose into the air and glared into Derek's eyes, her steely glare made his jaw clench as he swallowed hard.

"I don't believe you were a part of this conversation, Doctor Grey." Derek said with a great deal of contempt, his anger was beginning to boil over, and he clenched his jaw.

"She is coming with me, Doctor Shepherd. She is my daughter… I can take things from here." Ellis said angrily.

"Derek." Meredith whispered as she carefully touched Adam's head. The little boy looked up at her as he squeezed her tightly.

"Please come with us, Meredith… please? Please?" Adam begged as he whimpered.

"Derek… I…" Meredith whispered as she watched his eyes meet hers. His crystal blue eyes held a delicate sadness, that she wanted so badly to quell. She held her daughter tightly as she looked down at Adam. "Baby…" She whispered as she crouched down to Adam's level with Emma in her arms. "Adam…" She said as she ran her fingers through his dark hair as he whimpered, his lip trembling as tears came to his eyes. "Adam… I am so sorry…" She whispered as she watched his lip tremble.

"No…" He whimpered. "No, Meredith…" He whimpered. "You and Emma are supposed to spend Christmas with us. You're supposed to be my mommy for Christmas! I told Santa that I wanted a mommy for Christmas!" He exclaimed as he cried, tears rolling down his cheeks as his crystal blue eyes sparkled with sadness. "You were supposed to be my mommy for Christmas!" He exclaimed as he turned and slammed himself into Derek's leg as he began to sob. Derek's hand went to his son's head and he looked up at Meredith to see the tears in her eyes. Ellis watched the two of them closely as she watched the unspoken conversation between the two adults.

"Derek." Meredith croaked as her heart broke for the sobbing boy as he gripped his father's leg.

Derek was obviously spooked by his son's words, and his obvious attachment to Meredith. Though he'd be lying to himself if he said he wasn't attached to her as well. He took a slow deep breath and his eyes flashed to Ellis as she stood sternly beside them and then back to Meredith's. "I should… probably…"

"Go." Meredith whimpered as she also took a slow, deep breath. "Thank you, Derek." She whispered, as she watched him lift his sobbing son from the floor, his head burying in his father's neck as his tears wet Derek's skin, his hot breath and deep, guttural cry was breaking his heart.

"I'm sorry, Meredith." He whispered, as he glanced to Ellis and then back to Meredith. "Emma…" Derek whispered. "It was very nice to meet you… to meet you both." He whispered, as his eyes passed to Ellis. "You had better take very good care of them." He said as he watched her sneer at him as he took a step backwards, trying desperately not to be affected by Meredith's tears. "You have my number, Meredith." Derek said as he took another step backwards. "Make sure you call me if you need anything." He said, nodding his head. "I'm serious… anything." He said, as he took another step backwards.

"I'm sorry." She whispered as she watched him turn. "I'm sorry, Derek." She said, as he turned around and walked down the hallway toward his sisters, only to watch as Adam lifted his head, and wiggled his fingers in a sad and desperate goodbye. "I'm sorry, Adam." She whispered, as they disappeared around the corner, leaving Meredith and Emma, and perhaps, a tiny piece of his heart behind.


	3. Needing Someone isn't Easy

Two years later-

August 3rd-

"What kind of man agrees to meet at a park?" Meredith said as she paced back and forth, her head shaking as she looked to her friend sitting at the counter, watching her walk back and forth. "Seriously, Cristina… seriously…"

"Seriously, Mer?" Cristina asked.

"Seriously." Meredith said as she stopped, stared at her friend as she watched her sit at the counter, her head leaning in her hands as she shook her head.

"You are so neurotic." Cristina sighed.

"Yeah, well… you're not helpful." She said as she started to pace again.

"Meredith…" Cristina sighed as she shook her head. "How long has it been since Rick died?" She asked as Meredith turned her head and looked at her friend as she tilted her head.

"Two and a half years…" She said as she waited for Cristina to continue.

"And how many dates have you been on, since then?" She asked as she sighed.

"Um… two and a half…" Meredith cringed as she shrugged.

"Two and a half! See that! What are you doing to yourself, Meredith? You need to get laid…"

"Cristina! Emma is in the next room!" Meredith exclaimed as she glanced to the door.

"So what… she's six… she's going to have to learn about it eventually." Cristina shrugged as she stared her friend in the eyes. "My point is… you need some lovin… and if Mister... pedophile park goer guy is the one for you, then you won't know if until you meet him." She shrugged as she slid from the chair. "Besides… where did you even find this guy?"

"He's the son of one of the doctors my mother works with. He's bringing along a friend's kid who is about Emma's age... He figured it would be less awkward, I guess." Meredith replied as she followed her friend toward the front hallway of the apartment. She passed Emma, and waved to the little girl as she sat on the floor playing with her dolls.

"There is your problem." Cristina sighed as she shook her head and opened the front door. "You're letting your mother set you up on a date. Meredith, this is New York… there are thousands of men out there… you should quit swimming in the medical gene pool and go out to a bar or something." She said as she shrugged. "Maybe you can find yourself a quick lay… get yourself back on the horse…ride that sucker into the sunset... or at least until you forget your name." Cristina shrugged.

"Thank you for the colorful metaphor, Cristina…" Meredith said as she shook her head at her friend. "I have to get ready for my date…" She said with a sigh as she glanced back at Emma.

"Well… have fun… bring mace… give Emma a cell phone just in case the guy kidnaps you and you need her to call for help." Cristina said in a bored voice, her eyes rolling as she backed out of the room.

"Goodbye, Cristina…" Meredith rolled her eyes as she closed the door on her friend. She turned her back on the door, leaning against it for a moment as she rubbed the bridge of her nose.

"Are you alright, Mommy?" Emma asked as she looked up at her mother's frustrated appearance.

Meredith looked up and gave her daughter a gentle smile. "Mommy's alright… Just a little tired… why don't we pick up your toys… and we'll go to the park."

"Okay." She said with a smile as she stood up, watching as Meredith sighed and made her way toward her bedroom with a yawn. "Mama?" She asked as she watched Meredith turn around and raise her eyebrows in question. "Can we see the horses in park?"

"Huh?" Meredith said, caught offguard by Emma's question as she watched her daughter's eyes sparkle. "Oh! Oh, in Central Park... the horses... yeah... yeah... we'll do that..." Meredith said with a nod and a smile as she turned toward her room. She shook her head and laughed to herself as she walked into the bedroom to get ready.

* * *

"Let me put this as nicely as possible, Mark. If you were the last adult on the face of the planet… and my son needed a babysitter… I would come back from beyond the grave and watch him myself before I let you take him on a date with you." Derek said as he shook his head.

"That doesn't even make sense." Mark huffed as he crossed his arms over his chest. "You said I was the last adult on earth. How would I have a date?"

"I rest my case." Derek said as he raised his eyebrows and turned around and put a chart on the desk as he flipped open the top and began to write notes.

"Hey! Is that a crack at my choice of women? Because I'll have you know, Cindy… she was at least ten years older than I was."

"Which one was Cindy?" Derek said as he continued to write.

"The blonde."

"The one with the three grandchildren?" Derek asked as he looked up at his friend and tilted his head and turned to walk down the hallway.

"Hey! They were triplets!" Mark said as he followed Derek down the hallway. He jogged up beside his friend and looked over at him. "And she had her daughter when she was really young…"

"Why don't you ask her to borrow one of her grandkids?" Derek said as he stopped in front of the surgery board for a moment and glanced to his friend.

"Derek! Come on! Adam is a good kid… he's well behaved… not easily manipulated."

"That's right, Mark… that's how you should label children… whether or not they can beat you in a game of keep away…" Derek rolled his eyes. "I'm busy here… stop trying to purchase my child, and be a big boy… and go on the date alone. What are you afraid of, anyway?"

"I wanted to show her that I'm good with kids." Mark shrugged as he watched Derek give him a humored glare.

"You wanted to show that you're good with kids, by bringing someone else's child on a date with you? Where are you meeting, anyway?"

"At the park." Mark shrugged. "Playground."

"You do know that 'playground' means 'playground' and not 'strip club', right?" Derek laughed as Mark reached out and punched his friend's arm playfully.

"You are such an ass!" Mark said as Derek laughed and shook his head. "So can I take Adam or not? Her kid is going to be there…" He shrugged.

"No Mark. I will not allow you to take my son on a date with a single mother who has nothing better to do with her time and effort than date someone that his mother set her up with. I mean, seriously… can't she find her own date? Whose idea was it to bring her kid along, anyway?" Derek scoffed "She's better off getting a sitter and going to a bar… frankly, it's irresponsible." He shrugged.

"Well… I'll be sure to tell her that when I meet her." Mark said as he sighed. "Well, whatever…" He shook his head as he sighed. "I'm off now… I need to get showered and changed… Meet up with my MI…"

Derek turned sharply and punched Mark in the arm, giving him a glare. "And yet another reason that you're not allowed to take my son out in public." Derek said sharply as Mark laughed.

"What? I was going to say 'Middle aged mommy'…" He shrugged as he laughed. Derek rolled his eyes and walked down the hall, leaving him standing for a moment as he turned sharply and made his way to the locker room.

* * *

Derek walked into a patient's room and began to talk to them about the procedure that he would be performing later in the afternoon. The patient seemed nervous, but Derek remained calm and polite, and by the time Derek was done explaining the procedure, the patient seemed very much at ease. Derek paused as he asked him if he had any more questions, when he felt his phone vibrating in his pocket. He turned it to see the number on the phone and sighed when he looked up at the patient. "Can you excuse me for just a minute? It's my son…" He said as the patient nodded and watched Derek turn and walk out of the room, he lifted the phone to his ear and leaned against the wall.

"Adam?" He said as he heard his son's voice huff over the line. "Daddy is at work, buddy…"

"I know." Adam said as he huffed again.

"What's going on?" Derek asked.

"Daddy… I want to go to the park with M-dawg." He said with a sigh as he listened to Derek's low growl under his breath as he paused. "Please, Daddy?"

"First of all…" Derek said as he sighed. "How did you know that Mark was going to the park today? And secondly, I have told you a million times… his name is Mark… not 'M-dawg', not 'Big-M' not 'M-daddy'… it's Mark… will you call him by his real name, please?"

"If I call him by his real name, can I go to the park with him?" Adam asked as he grinned over the phone, giggling a little as he listened to the frustration in his father's voice.

"Adam… no…"

"Please, daddy, please? Please?" Adam asked as Derek rolled his eyes and leaned against the wall, staring at the ceiling as he listened to his son's hopeful voice on the other side of the line.

"Where is your Aunt Beth?" Derek asked as he sighed.

"She's in her office." He said quickly. "We were playing outside, and Mark came over and…" Suddenly, Adam was cut off for a moment and the phone was being fumbled around as Derek clenched his jaw. "We were playing outside… and um…" Adam said as Derek listened, hearing a voice whispering behind his son, he shook his head disapprovingly. "Daddy, can I please go with Mark? I'm his wing man! He calls me his wing man, I gotta go! I gotta go! Please? Please, Daddy?"

"Let me talk with Mark, please…" Derek said as he listened to his son pause and whisper something to Mark. He then heard the phone exchange hands.

"Oh… Hey, Derek…" Mark said as he pretended that he was surprised to hear his friend's voice.

"Kidnapping is a crime, Mark." Derek said with an irritated sigh.

"I'm not kidnapping… I was in the neighborhood… so I decided to stop in and visit your sister…" He said as he shrugged.

"And have my son call me and guilt me into letting him to the park with you so that you can use him to distract her kid so that you and she can do the nasty nasty on the park bench?" Derek whispered, looking around to make sure that no one was listening.

"They don't let you do the nasty nasty on park benches, Derek… that's where the bums sleep." He joked as Derek sighed. "Come on, Derek… let the kid get out for a bit… he's been stuck at your sister's house every day this summer… school is going to start soon, let him have a little fun."

"He has plenty of fun at Beth's house…" Derek said with a sigh.

"Not park fun… come on… he can make a new friend…"

"Have you even talked to this woman on the phone, Mark?" Derek asked as he sighed at the silence on the line. "Mark…? Do you even know her name?"

"Mary… or something, her name is Mary…"

"Or something." Derek sighed.

"My mom says she's cute… and she's really nice…" Mark sighed.

"She's probably fat with bad teeth and a bald spot." Derek sighed. He listened on the line for Mark as he swallowed hard. He looked to the clock and then looked at the floor. "Listen." Derek said. "You can take him with you… but on the condition that you keep a very, very close eye on him, Mark…"

"I won't take my eyes off him." Mark replied.

"You will have him at my house by five o'clock… No excuses, no snacks, bathroom breaks or coffee stops…"

"Yeah, you know how Adam needs his caffeine fix." Mark mumbled.

"Do you want me to change my mind?" Derek asked.

"I'll keep him safe, don't worry. He's my wingman… It's not like this is the first time he's been on a date with me, anyway." Mark shrugged.

"What?" Derek asked as his face began to turn red.

"See you at five!" Mark said as he put the phone back on the hook and looked to Adam, who was grinning brightly at Mark.

"Are we going, M-dawg?" He asked as he held his hand up for a high five.

"Hell yeah we are, Wing man!" Mark exclaimed as he gave the little boy a high five.

"Hell YEAH!" Adam exclaimed.

"Yeah… we probably shouldn't say that…" Mark mumbled as he lifted the little boy from the floor.

"Yeah, probably not…" Adam giggled as Mark brought him into the house in search of his Aunt to tell her where they were going.

* * *

Meredith walked down the path with Emma's hand planted firmly within her own. She watched as her daughter skipped slightly as they neared the playground, her smile was bright and happy as she chattered on about this and that. She looked around the playground and there were several children playing on the swings, the slides, the various play equipment, as Emma looked up into her mother's eyes and smiled.

"Can I go play now, Mama?" She asked as Meredith shrugged slightly.

"Go ahead…" She said as she nodded toward the playground, her daughter's hand slipping from her grasp eagerly as she ran as quickly as she could toward the large playground. Meredith sighed as she looked around, seeing several parents sitting on benches, talking to children, reading, some were sharing a sandwich with their child. Her eyes scanned the different benches as they settled on a man sitting by himself, his eyes scanning the playground as he watched the children play happily. She allowed herself a moment to scrutinize his appearance, wondering if perhaps this was the man she was meeting with, Mark Sloan.

He was about her age, perhaps a bit older, handsome and professional looking, without being an all out metro sexual. He seemed a bit anxious, wringing his hands in an anxiety ridden way, she felt like a voyeur, watching his nervous ticks from afar. She thought for a moment that perhaps this was a bad idea, meeting a man at the park. She didn't know if he was watching the playground because he knew someone there, or maybe Cristina was right, maybe he's just a pervert. She pushed her fears aside, deciding that if she didn't take a chance, she would never be able to move on.

She took a slow deep breath and walked toward him, hoping upon hope that someone didn't sit beside him first, or that it was this man she was meeting, not the strange old man sitting down several benches who was staring at the tree in front of him while he licked his lips. "I need to get out of the city…" Meredith mumbled as she neared the man, his attention was on the playground, until she came into his line of sight, and suddenly his eyes were on her. He had a hopeful glint in his eyes, and she took it as a compliment, only expecting that he was probably relieved that she wasn't some old hag that his mother had set him up with… or perhaps he likes old hags… Meredith nearly kicked herself as she smiled shyly and approached him.

"Mark?" She said, her voice was soft and timid, her hands were trembling slightly. Mark looked up into her eyes, and smiled a soft, tender smile as he held his hand out, grasping her hand in his, she smiled when she felt his warm hand against hers. His face was friendlier closer up than it was from afar, and he seemed genuinely happy to meet her. "I'm Meredith." She said as he nodded.

"It's very nice to meet you…" He said with a smile as he shook her hand. "Sit down… sit down…" He said as he moved slightly on the bench, making more room for her as she turned and sat down beside him, watching as his eyes never left her. It wasn't a leering stare, but more of a respected admiration as her eyes met his once again.

"I'm sorry I was running behind a little… " She said as she sighed. "I don't live far from here… so we decided to walk."

"It's no problem… we haven't been waiting long." Mark replied as he nodded his head. He seemed genuinely nervous as he glanced to the playground, and back to Meredith. "How did you… um know… that it was me?" He asked curiously, trying to make conversation as he watched her smile slightly as her eyes passed to the playground and back to him.

"Well… honestly… when parents bring their kids to the playground, they don't usually watch them too closely. I noticed that your eyes were on the playground very intently… so I figured that um… since you were bringing your friend's child, you were making sure to keep an eye on him." She said as she nodded. "Either that, or you were a sexual predator…" She said as she covered her mouth in surprise of her slip of the tongue, her eyes widening as Mark laughed. "Oh my god, I can't believe I said that… I am sorry…" She said as her cheeks turned bright red as Mark continued to laugh. "I am really not good with first impressions… I am sorry…" She said as she shook her head. "I tend to be sarcastic when I'm nervous…"

"No…" Mark chuckled as he shook his head. "That's okay…" He laughed.

"Seriously, that was really not very nice…" Meredith said as she shook her head. "I'm sorry…" She said as she took a slow, deep breath.

"Hey… who am I to judge… you're a risk taker." He shrugged. "You were going to either end up talking with a guy who takes joy in being creepy, and making people feel good… or you were going to end up with a sexual predator…" Mark laughed. "Either way, you were on the right track." He said as he watched her laugh at his joke, her cheeks returning to a light pink color as she giggled beside him.

"You have a sense of humor…" She said with a slight giggle. "I should get my list of pros and cons out…" She replied as she watched him chuckle as his eyes went to the playground again.

"You do that too, huh?" He asked as she laughed.

"Well… I have to cross bald and toothless off the list…" Meredith nodded with a hint of a smirk.

"Me too." He said as he listened to her melodic giggle as he shook his head and laughed. "Seriously though… You're honestly not as bad as you think with first impressions." Mark said as he watched her eyes smile at him as they sparkled slightly.

"Yeah? Well… I met my husband at a car wash." She said with a giggle. "The window was open a crack when I drove through the automatic washer, and I got soap in my eye." She said as she giggled. "He was working there to make some money while he was in school, and he was one of the attendants there… and when I walked into the office, I was soaking wet, my eye was red and bloodshot, and I was crying like a baby…" She laughed.

"Well, he must have liked that, if you ended up getting married…" Mark shrugged with a laugh as he nodded. "Um… my mother told me what happened…" He said as he watched her become quiet, her eyes moving toward the playground as she swallowed hard. He could tell that she was beginning to feel self conscious, her foot began to tap slightly. "I um… I'm sorry for your loss…" He said softly as she suddenly looked up at him and gave him a slight smile.

"I'm moving past that now." She said quickly as she fidgeted with her fingers. "I'm um… moving past that now… but thank you." She said as she looked at her watch, not thinking, she closed her eyes as she shook her head, knowing that it didn't look good for her to do that. She looked up at Mark and saw a sympathetic look in his eyes as he gave her a hopeful smile.

"So… what do you do… I mean… my mother mentioned that you just graduated medical school, and you're…"

"I'm starting my internship… two days, and then I start my internship." She nodded. "University hospital." She said as she moved her thumb to indicate down the road. "Surgical intern…" She said as she watched a smirk begin to appear on his face. "What?"

"It sounds like we're going to be seeing a lot more of one another…" He said as she gave him a curious smile, tilting her head as he laughed. "I'm an attending there… plastics…"

"Seriously?" She asked as she laughed out loud, her eyes brightening back up as she smiled.

"Yep… so you're in the new class, huh?"

"Yes… yes I am…" She said with a smile. "Em is having her first day of daycare, and I'm having my first day of work… a day of firsts." She said as she glanced to the playground again, and saw Emma on the slide, laughing as she slid down happily.

"Sounds like you're doing quite well for yourselves." Mark said as he nodded his head and smiled. He was about to turn and ask her a question, when suddenly, his pager went off. He looked at the number on the pager and sighed. "Oh crap… I have to take this…" He said as he looked to Meredith. "I am really, really, really sorry…" He said apologetically as he shook his head. "Seriously… I was having a really good time." He said as he stood up and glanced to the playground.

"I'll give you a call… maybe we can go out for a drink or something… how does that sound?" He asked as he watched her start to say something and stop herself as she watched his panicked eyes as he clipped his pager back on his belt. "I'll call you later…" He said as he turned sharply and walked over to the playground.

"Wing man!" He called as he entered the small fence that surrounded the playground, he called again, and Meredith watched from afar as a dark haired little boy hopped from one of the swings and ran toward Mark. He crouched down and Meredith watched the little boy stomp his feet a little as Mark nodded toward the road. He grabbed the little boy's hand, and the two of them rushed off together.

Meredith sat on the bench, staring at Mark, and the little boy as they disappeared down the street. She sighed as she felt a lump in her throat, and a sudden wave of loneliness wash over her. "Yeah…" She sighed as she felt a tear roll down her cheek. "You don't even have my phone number, you dolt… I called you." She mumbled as she sighed. She lifted her cell phone and dialed Cristina's number, waiting patiently for someone to answer. "Hey."

"Do you need someone to pick Emma up… you gonna go get some?"

"The only 'some' that I'm going to be having tonight, will be 'some' tequila." She whispered into the line. "Please come down to the park and pick us up." She whispered. "I really don't feel like walking…" She whispered.

"Mer, are you alright?"

"I don't feel like walking." She mumbled as she closed her phone and sighed, staring off at the playground, as she swallowed her sadness.

* * *

Derek walked out of a patient's room just as Mark passed by. Mark didn't notice him as he sped down the hallway and Derek reached his hand out to grab hold of his jacket.

"Hey, watch…it." Mark mumbled as he noticed that Derek had been the one pulling on him.

"Where are you going?"

"I was paged 911 to Mr. Thompson's room… I need to…" Mark said as he watched Derek shake his head.

"Mr. Thompson has been taken care of, Mark. I told them not to page you. Where is my son?"

"I dropped him off at the daycare downstairs." Mark said as he lifted his hand to his forehead. "You're serious… they don't freaking need me?" He asked as he huffed a sigh.

"That's what the telephone is for, Mark." Derek shrugged as he looked up at his friend to see that he was genuinely upset. "You had to leave your date?"

"Yes." He said as he turned and leaned his back against the wall. "I was having a good time too… she was really hot." Mark said as he turned his head. "And funny…cute…"

"You were there ten minutes, how did you know she was funny?" Derek asked as he watched Mark shake his head. "She probably thinks you bailed on her." He shrugged as he watched Mark scroll through his phone.

"Crap!" Mark exclaimed as he swung his arm down and looked to the ceiling. "I don't have her phone number… it's not in here anymore." He said as he sighed.

"I guess it wasn't meant to be." Derek shrugged as he turned and started to walk down the hallway.

"Like hell it wasn't…" he said as he stood up straight. "I'm running over there to see if she's still there… Adam is in daycare… I'll stop over later." Mark said as he sighed.

"Good luck…" Derek said as he turned his head, only to find that Mark was already jogging down the hallway in the other direction. He smirked slightly as he shook his head, making his way toward the OR.

* * *

Meredith held Emma's hand tightly as they walked toward Cristina's car as it waited on the road. "Mama, I wasn't done playing…" Emma mumbled softly as Meredith tugged her arm slightly, and turned and tilted her head. Emma saw the look on her mother's face and she recognized the sadness within her eyes. "It's okay…" She mumbled as Meredith reached the car, opening the door for her daughter, she watched as she climbed into the back seat and buckled up. Meredith climbed into the passenger seat and pulled her seatbelt around her.

She glanced to Cristina and gave her a look that was filled with warning. "Don't say a word." She mumbled as Cristina nodded and started to drive.

"Do you want to…"

"I said not to say a word." Meredith replied. She glanced back at Emma, who was watching her mother carefully, keeping her thoughts to herself as she noticed Cristina glance to Meredith again as she continue to drive. There was a soft, calm silence that filled the car, it was friendly but awkward. Emma watched her mother's head turn to her friend, and back toward the windshield again, then back to her friend. "You have three questions you can ask me." She said softly.

"Three?" Cristina asked.

"Three." Meredith nodded.

"Did he show up?" Cristina asked as she turned her eyes to her friend for a moment as she drove.

"Yes." Meredith replied, nodding softly.

"Was he hot?" She asked as she nudged her friend, getting a slight glare in her direction, she sighed.

"Yes." Meredith mumbled. "Yes, he was hot." She sighed. "Last question."

"What the hell happened?" Cristina asked as she nudged Meredith again, receiving a pitiful look from her friend, as she sighed, and turned her head.

-------------

Derek walked downstairs to the daycare, he walked around the corner and opened the door, and before he could even talk to the nurse behind the counter, Adam was by his side. "Daddy!" He exclaimed as he latched onto his father's leg.

"Hey… what's with the tackle?" Derek asked with a half laugh as he lifted his little boy into his arms and listened to him giggle.

"M-dawg brought me to the park, and then he just brought me here after! We were there for like two seconds!" Adam exclaimed.

"You were?" Derek asked with a sigh as he kissed his son's cheek.

"Yeah… It was fun though…"

"Good, I'm glad you guys had some fun…" Derek said as he signed his son out of the daycare and put him onto the floor, feeling him latch onto his hand as he smiled at his little boy. "Let's get you home… we'll have some dinner, and maybe we'll play a little catch or something… ride that new bike of yours."

"Hell Yeah!" Adam exclaimed as he grinned, pulling his father's arm as Derek's eyes widened in surprise and Adam's hand slapped over his mouth as Derek stopped.

"I think I am going to have a long talk with 'M-dawg'." Derek said in a stern voice, as he watched his son giggle behind his hand. "Oh, you think that's funny?" Derek asked with a smirk. "You think that's funny?" He asked again as Adam laughed and nodded, so with a laugh, he lifted his son over his shoulder, gave him a light pat on his bottom and laughed as he carted him off to the elevator.

* * *

Meredith set the bowl of spaghetti on the table, the glass bowl hitting the wooden table with a dull clunk as she glanced to Cristina. Her friend's eyebrows were raised slightly as Meredith shook her head. "Don't look at me like that." She said as she grabbed the spoon and scooped a spoonful of spaghetti and put it on a plate and placed it in front of Emma.

"Don't look at you like what?" Cristina asked.

"Like I'm going to break apart at any minute." She said as she sighed. "I'm not fragile, Cristina… I can do this. It's a simple rejection." She shrugged as she scooped spaghetti on a second plate and handed it to Cristina, who took it gratefully as she scooped herself a plate.

"It's a simple rejection for me… for any normal person."

"You're not normal." Meredith pointed out as she spun her fork in her hand and sat down.

"Right… I would have grabbed him by the…" She glanced to Emma and back to Meredith. "Tie… right then and there and pulled on it until he screamed for mercy."

"And you are lecturing me on how I don't take rejection well." Meredith said as she smiled a little. "But really… I am fine… it was stupid to do at this time anyway. I will be starting my internship… I'm not going to have enough time for a relationship, a job, and Emma, so it's better that I just don't do the relationship thing." She said as she sighed, giving Emma a soft smile as the little girl smiled back at her mother, listening to the conversation carefully. "Besides… he was a surgeon… why bother even trying to have a relationship with a surgeon who is so involved in his job, that he just runs off whenever his pager goes off."

"Maybe someone was dying…"

"He's a plastics surgeon, Cris."

"People get burned, Meredith, skin grafts, crap like that… Don't be so short sighted. Do you think he ran off to perform an emergency boob job or something?" Cristina laughed as she watched Meredith glare at her.

"No… I don't think he ran off to perform an emergency boob job." She grumbled at her friend. "I think there wasn't a page… I think he just thought I was bad news… so he had a friend to page him so that he could have an out… and he said he'd decide whether or not to answer the page based on whether he wanted to continue the date."

"You're way too cynical." Cristina said as she continued to eat, watching Meredith eat and glare at her occasionally as she glanced to Emma.

Emma sat in her chair staring at her spaghetti, she hadn't eaten much, and her fork was in her hand as she watched the two adults. "Mommy, I'm not hungry, can I go now?"

"Sweetheart… why don't you try to eat just a little more…"

"I'm not hungry." She shrugged as she swung her legs to the side. "Thank you for dinner." She said as she hopped from the chair and leaned over to kiss her mother's cheek.

Meredith reached out and grabbed for her daughter's hand, tugging it lightly as she felt her daughter spring back and look into her eyes. "Are you sure you're okay?" She asked, giving her daughter a half smirk as the little girl smiled back gently and nodded her head.

"I promise." She said with a nod as she smirked at her mother. "Nighty, mama…"

"Nighty, baby…" Meredith said as she watched her daughter turn and walk out of the dining room, a slight skip in her step as she disappeared out of the room.

Meredith pushed her dinner away from in front of her, her stomach gone sour for some reason, her heart aching for her little girl. "I'm not hungry anymore…" She sighed as she stared at her plate full of spaghetti and rested her head in her hands as she stared at the table.

"Good…" Cristina said as she shoved a mouthful of spaghetti into her mouth. "Empty stomach will be much better for the tequila… you'll get drunker quicker, and you'll puke less." She said as she smirked, as Meredith looked up and gave her a shake of the head.

-----------

Derek set the plate with the cheeseburger and French fries on the table in front of his son, watching as Adam lifted it to his mouth and smiled up at him with bright blue eyes, a smile in his eyes as he munched happily on his cheeseburger. Derek put his own cheeseburger on his plate and sat across from him, smiling at his son as he began to eat.

"Can't we watch tv and eat at the same time?" Adam asked with a full mouth, a bit of the hamburger bun falling from his mouth as he looked up at Derek.

"First of all… please don't talk with your mouth full…" Derek said when he finished his bite. "And second of all… we cannot watch tv and eat… this is dinner time, family time… you have to sit in here with me."

"But I want to watch television…" Adam whined as he looked toward the television in the living room and gave his father a tilt of his head. "Pleaaase?" He asked as he batted his eyelashes and stuck his lower lip out at his father.

"See… that doesn't work on me…" Derek replied as he shook his head. "Eat your cheeseburger and then I'll think about letting you watch television." He said with his eyebrows raised. Adam pouted a little and sighed. "Oh, don't give me that pitiful look… you know the rules…" Derek said. "Did you have fun at the playground?"

Adam nodded his head as he took a bite from his cheeseburger, he chewed it up and his face became serious as he sighed. "I saw Emma there…" He said as he munched on a French fry from his plate.

"Yeah? Is that one of the little girls from your daycare at the hospital?" Derek asked, his mind a little scattered as he looked tilted his head and watched Adam shake his head.

"No…" He shook his head. "No, Daddy… Emma… I saw Emma… you know Emma…" He said as he let his palm hit the table, his head shaking as he stared his father in the eyes.

"Emma?" Derek asked as he recognized the name, but couldn't quite fit the face, until he spoke the next three words.

"Emma and Meredith?" Adam said, as Derek's eyes locked with his son's, jarred suddenly by the door of the house slamming shut, and Mark walking through the house.

"Honey, I'm home!" Mark said as he stepped into the dining room, seeing Derek turn his head and raise his eyebrows.

"M-Dawg!" Adam said with a excited smile, his grin was bright and happy.

"Cut that out… you don't live here… why do you come into the house like you live here?" Derek said, his voice was irritated, he wanted to get back to the conversation with Adam when Mark leaned against the doorframe.

"I'm sorry?" Mark said as he smiled. "Whatcha eating?" He asked as he walked over to the stove, grabbing a hamburger bun, he put Derek's second cheeseburger on it and took a big bite before Derek could say anything.

"M-dawg! Can we eat and watch tv at the same time?" Adam asked excitedly as he avoided eye contact with Derek.

"Sure!" Mark exclaimed.

"YEAH!" Adam exclaimed as he grabbed his plate and took off running for the living room.

"Adam!" Derek exclaimed as the little boy ran past him.

"Mark said I could!" He exclaimed as he disappeared out the door.

Mark walked over to the table and took another big bite from his hamburger as Derek just glared at him across the table. "What?" Mark asked with a full mouth, a bit of hamburger roll falling from his lips as he gave Derek a smarmy smirk around his full mouth.

* * *

I don't think this is freaking fair, you know… I'm a nice girl… right? I'm a nice woman… I'm a hot woman! A hot, hot… woman… feel my hand!" Meredith exclaimed as she lay sprawled on the couch, her hand swinging out to smack her friend in the face as she turned sharply toward Meredith.

"You're hot!" Cristina exclaimed, giggling as her speech slurred, her voice giggling slightly as Meredith sighed. "We should call his ass up and tell him what a fareaking douchebag he is!"

"Yeah... we should... no...no, we shouldn't call him up... that... that's not nice..." Meredith mumbled as she whimpered softly, feeling tears welling up in her eyes.

"Stop crying! For crap's sake, stop crying... stop feeling sorry for yourself! Stick up for yourself! Stick up for yourself! You're a hot freaking woman! You don't deserved to be treated like dirt!" Cristina exclaimed. "You're hot..." She mumbled as she took the shot glass in front of her and swallowed the tequila in it, tasting the tickling liquid on her tongue.

"I thinks so… I thinks I am…" She nodded as she grabbed the bottle of tequila from the table and put it to her lips. "Mark don't think so… and you know… I'm gonna have to see that asshole at work! He works at the hospital!" She exclaimed as she took a swig of tequila and swallowed it, squinting as the hot liquid passed her lips and moved down into her stomach, the warmth not stopping there as she felt it permeating her blood vessels, numbing the pain in her mind.

"You said that… you said he works in plastics… stupid plastics guy… I bet he only works there so he can touch boobs!"

"Stupid BOOB TOUCHER!" Meredith exclaimed as Cristina's hand clamped over her friend's mouth and they both started giggling.

"You're going to wake up Emma… then you're going to be in biiiiig torb… torub…Touruble…" Cristina was finally able to get out as she started to laugh hysterically, her stomach twisting as she sighed. "Gimme more…" Cristina mumbled as she sighed, taking the bottle from Meredith as she watched her lip stick out. "Don't pout… you look like a fish when you do that." She said as Meredith sighed, and tipped forward, smacking her head lightly on the table top as she kept her forehead resting upon it. "Mer?"

"I'm fine." She mumbled against the wood with a sigh.

--------------------  
Derek and Mark sat on opposite ends of the couch. The television was on, and Mark was watching it, but Derek was watching the coffee table. His thoughts were lost somewhere between work and his son's words, and he sat there wondering if he was truthful. Adam and Mark had horsed around a bit after dinner, both wearing one another out as Mark chased his son around the house, wrestling and being loud, though Derek had hardly noticed, his mind and heart on other things as he sighed and continued staring.

"So don't you want to know what happened?" Mark asked as he watched Derek pause for a moment before his staring contest with the wooden table ceased.

"Huh?" Derek said as he looked up at his friend.

"With the girl at the park… You're out of it today, Derek… what's going on with you?"

"Nothing." Derek shook his head. "I'm just tired… long day." He sighed.

Mark nodded at his friend's reply. He understood a long day, he knew that it was tough on Derek from day to day to both work and care for his son. He just couldn't understand why Derek was so distracted. "So did you want to know?" Mark asked.

"About the girl?" Derek said, his eyes moving to his friend's as he felt his throat close up a bit.

"Yeah… She wasn't there when I got there." Mark replied with a sigh. "She probably thinks I'm the biggest jerk on the face of the earth…" Mark said as he tipped his head back.

"Why should that bother you now, Mark? It never bothered you before…" Derek said as he tried to remain calm and distant from the conversation, his eyes not meeting his friend's as he took a slow, deep breath, and continued to only think of what Adam had said.

"Well… she was nice." He shrugged. "She was really nice… I think I'd like to see her again… I didn't even catch her last name." He said as he sighed. "I guess I'll talk to her at work."

"At work?" Derek asked as he looked to Mark, his eyes clashing as he gave him a confused glance.

"Yeah… She's an intern… part of the new class coming in on Monday… Derek, are you sure you're alright?" Mark asked as he watched his friend's face. It was pale and emotionless, he looked downright sick.

"I'm… just really tired." He said softly as he swallowed hard, averting his eyes again as he paused.

"Well…" Mark said as he stretched a little, standing slowly as he watched Derek stare off at the coffee table. "If you're alright… I'm going to take off… You could use some sleep…" Mark said as Derek looked up at him.

"Yeah…" Derek nodded as he stood up.

Mark walked toward the door, opening it slowly, he watched as Derek bit his lip slightly, standing awkwardly as he waited for his friend to leave. He stood staring at the door, his mind reeling as he suddenly did what he knew that he had to do, or else he would never get to sleep that night. "Hey Mark…?" Derek asked as he stepped forward, grabbing the door as Mark released the doorknob and glanced back at his friend. "What was the girl's name?" Derek asked. "The girl at the park… what was her name?" He asked.

"Um… Meredith." Mark nodded, watching his friend's eyes. "Why?"

"No reason." Derek said softly. "Goodnight." He said, as he closed the door and locked it, turning around, he put his back to the door and released the breath that he had been holding. It was only then that he realized that his eyes were tearing up.

* * *

Meredith sipped a little more from the bottle, her mind was in several different places and her heart was feeling lower than ever. She wanted to cry, but couldn't find the tears. She wanted to move, but Cristina was passed out on her legs. She sipped the tequila again, glancing to her friend, she ran her fingers through her hair for a moment and leaned her head to the side, feeling the alcohol rushing through her body, as she leaned on her hand on the edge of the couch.

"I need a life…" She grunted as she climbed from her spot, pulling her foot from beneath Cristina, planting it firmly on the floor as she tried to keep her balance, and not knock her friend completely off the couch. She turned and leaned on the arm of the couch, finding herself teetering slightly as she rested her head on it, closing her eyes tightly as she tried to catch her bearings. She could feel the hard pit of nausea in the bottom of her stomach, like a bowling ball rolling around in her gut, the tequila sloshing in her stomach as it waited its turn to enter her bloodstream. She stood up straight, looking down at her feet as she found her legs twisted, a product of drunkenness, sleepiness and laziness as she steadied herself on the couch and moved her legs appropriately as she grabbed the blanket from the back of the couch.

She haphazardly tossed it on top of her friend, using one hand to keep herself from falling over as she leaned over her friend for a moment, tucking the blanket around her. Strangely, she found herself checking to make sure her friend was still breathing, a habit that she had always had when she was drinking, for the fear of aspiration was on her mind when she drank, and the last thing she needed was someone to die because of her own depression. She listened to Cristina's snorting breathing as she slept peacefully against the comfortable couch cushion, and she stood up and shuffled toward her bedroom.

She stepped into her bedroom, her feet never leaving the floor as she shuffled along, mostly so that she wouldn't trip over anything. She fell forward onto her bed, feeling her body bounce against the mattress, the warm down comforter taking her body in willfully as her face pushed against the material. She breathed in deeply, smelling the soft sweet scent of fabric softener and soap, a welcomed change from the smell of tequila that was now permeating her skin. She lifted her head and looked up at the bedside table, the light was on and it was hurting her eyes. She reached forward to grab the lamp in order to switch it off, her hand knocking over one or two things as she rested it on the table, finding that she was farther from the lamp than she had figured in her drunken state. She slid her hand back, feeling it hit the bed with a flop. She sighed as she reached up again, her hand reaching out, it rested on her cell phone, and as she pulled her hand back, she found herself staring at the time on her phone.

"You're such a loser, Meredith…" She whispered to herself as she reached to put the phone back on the table, feeling it slide into her palm instead. She rolled onto her back and lifted the phone above her as she flipped it open and squinted to see the time. "One thirty?" She grunted as she rolled her eyes back and coughed, sending the phone slipping from her fingers, she was unable to catch it before it slammed into her face. "Stupid… stupid idiot…" She mumbled in a slurred, irritated voice as she grabbed her face with her hand and rubbed her nose. "Ow… motherfudge…" She whined as she held her face and gripped the phone in her hand as she rolled on the bed, dropping it beside her.

* * *

Derek sat on the couch, book in hand. It was nearly one thirty in the morning and he couldn't sleep. He couldn't read either, but he held the book up, and stared at the words for a very long time. He tipped his head back and stared at the ceiling. "Damn it, Derek…" He muttered to himself. "You knew her for forty eight hours… she didn't call you… she obviously doesn't give a crap… stop letting this eat you up inside…" He grumbled as he sighed, moving his head back down to look at the page, he sighed.

He couldn't stop thinking of her, their conversation, the way they had left things. He thought about her fears, her sadness, and her pain. He thought of the way he held her in the plane, the way he held her in the hospital bed, the way he let her head rest on his shoulder, and how she smiled when he had dragged that Christmas tree across the terminal and put her shoe on top of it. He could hear her laugh in his head, smell the soft, delicate flowery smell of her hair, he could feel her soft hand in his. He had known her for forty eight hours, yet he couldn't get her out of his mind.

He closed the book and stared at the ceiling, and suddenly his thoughts were interrupted by the obnoxious sound of a phone ringing. "What the…?" He mumbled as he looked around. He saw his phone sitting across the room on a table, and listened carefully to the ring tone. It was a familiar tone, obnoxious to the extreme, and definitely Mark's. "Jesus, Mark…" He mumbled as he rolled his eyes and stood up. He looked around and realized that it was coming from the couch cushions. He leaned down and pushed his hand between the cushions, lifting the phone from the fluffy confines of the couch. "Who the hell calls someone at one thirty in the morning?" He mumbled as he lifted the phone to his ear. "Mark's phone…" He mumbled into the line. "Hello?" He said into the line, listening to the fumbling sound of someone on the other side of the line. "Hello? Who is there? Are you alright? Hello?" Derek said again as he listened to the inaudible ranting of the person on the other line.

-------------

"Stupid… moronic… dumbstupid…" Meredith mumbled as she held her face with her hand and lay on her side, her attention suddenly brought to the phone, as she heard someone talking on the line. She gasped slightly as she grabbed the phone, slamming it against her ear, she mumbled inaudibly.

"Hello?" The person on the other side of the line said softly. "Are you alright?"

"Um…" Meredith muttered drunkenly as she took a deep breath, not recognizing the voice on the other end of the line. "Whoziz?" She mumbled as she listened to the person on the other line. "Hello?"

"Who do you think you're calling?" Derek asked, unsure if it was a wrong number, or truly someone looking for Mark. One could never tell.

Meredith pulled the phone from her ear and stared at the phone number. She recognized it, and she could feel the heat rising up in her face as she swallowed hard. "Crap…" She muttered as she stared at the phone.

"Are you still there?" Derek said as he waited for her to say something more.

"Mark?" She said into the phone, her voice was soft and full of worry. "I'm sorry… I'm… I'm…" She felt her stomach clenching at that moment, and paused for a moment.

"Meredith?" Derek whispered, his stomach knotted tightly as he listened to her voice. She was obviously drunk, from the slur in her voice to the way she seemed to be fumbling with the phone. There was a tender pause, and then something unexpected happened.

"Yes! Yes it's Meredith!" She exclaimed into the phone. She rolled onto her back and sat up slowly. "Damn straight it's Meredith, you goddamned pig! You stupid, stupid… stupid pig… How dare you… leave me stranded at the park like that? Huh? Who do you think you are? I am a beautiful woman… I am… I am… I am just a… I took a risk! A risk… meeting someone new! You just left me sitting there on that bench like a goddamned chump! Oh…. Oh, you had a page… a page… for what, huh? Did you have to go reconstruct someone's nose? Did you have to go fondle someone's boobs or something? You could have…um fondled my boobs! Do you have any idea how long it has been since someone has touched my boobs? I mean… for God's sake! I just want to be treated like I deserve to be treated! You are a poor, pathetic piece of crap with bad excuses and a stupid, stupid looking face… and I bet your… um… hair is not…" Meredith stopped screaming, expecting that the person on the other side of the line had hung up on her. She listened carefully and after a moment, she realized they were still on the line.

"Are you done?" Derek asked, his voice was sprinkled with humor as he listened to her try to catch her breath.

"Um… usually… guys hang up after um… the part where I call them a pig." She mumbled, a deep sigh coming from her side of the line as she felt her cheeks burning with embarrassment.

"So this isn't the first time you've drunk dialed someone?" He asked, a bit of a chuckle in his voice.

"Um… no." She mumbled. "I'm sorry…" She whispered. "I'm sorry…" She said as she felt a sudden wave of sadness wash over her, the lump in her throat was lodged deeply in her soul, and she found herself sobbing. "I'm sorry! I'm so sorry!" She exclaimed as she rolled onto her side with the phone to her ear, tears rolling down her face as they hit the mattress. "I'm so sorry… I probably woke you up… and I didn't mean to call you… my phone fell on my face, and I didn't know I pressed the button… and…"

"Wait…" Derek chuckled. "You dialed me with your face?" He asked as he listened to her whimper on the other line. "That's pretty talented." He said as he heard her sniffle.

"Thank you." She whimpered, her crying slowed as she listened to his voice. "I'm sorry…"

"It's okay…" He said softly. "You didn't wake me up. Are you alright?" He whispered tenderly.

"Yes." She whimpered. "No." She replied.

"Which is it?" He asked, feeling himself relax a little, he leaned back on the couch. "Are you alright?"

"I…may have had something to drink tonight?" She mumbled as she closed her eyes, her ears and cheeks still burning as she felt her stomach starting to relax.

"Well… at least you're not crazy, right?" He said softly. "You're just drunk…" he shrugged.

"And mortified." She whispered.

"Aww… don't worry about it…" He said tenderly as he listened to the tiny whimper that she emitted.

"I don't usually drink." She said, her words jumbling together as she sighed. "It's just that… when you left me at the park… I felt so… rejected and alone… and I don't know… I was convinced that you left because you didn't like me and I don't…I'm rambling again." She mumbled.

"It's okay." He replied softly. "You have a beautiful voice."

"You sound different." She mumbled, her eyes starting to close as she sniffled.

"Different?" Derek asked, listening to her breathing for a moment.

"Yeah…your voice is different… softer…I woke you up, didn't I?" She asked, her voice sounding smaller and smaller.

"No… no, you didn't wake me up… You just must be sleepy…" He said softly.

"Yeah…" She mumbled. "I am sleepy…"

"I'm sorry that I left you at the park, Meredith." Derek said as he played along. "I would have called you if I had your phone number…" He said, knowing that Mark probably would have called her back, if he had her number, he listened to her breathing slow. "Are you alright, Meredith?" He whispered as he listened for a moment.

"Mmmhmm…" She mumbled to herself as she listened to his voice, feeling herself starting to drift off.

"I'm going to hang up now, okay? Let you get some sleep?" He whispered.

"No…" She mumbled. "Stay with me until I fall asleep." She whispered into the phone. She lay relaxed, ever so gently falling to sleep with the phone to her ear, as she swore as her eyelids closed for good, that on the other side of the line, she heard him humming a gentle lullaby into her ear.

When he was sure that she had drifted off, Derek swallowed hard as he listened, not wanting to hang up. He paused for just a moment as he sighed. "Sweet Dreams, Meredith." He whispered as he took a slow, deep breath and closed the cell phone, he tipped his head back and stared at the ceiling as he prepared himself for a sleepless night on the couch.

* * *

The morning sun was shining through the window, blindingly bright as it entered unannounced and unwanted. Meredith could feel the beads of perspiration on her skin, the sun's light was too much to bear as she lay wrapped in her down comforter, the sickeningly bitter taste of tequila on her tongue as she stuck it out of her mouth and tried to wish the pain in her head, and crick in her neck away.

"Oh… Crap…" She muttered as she lolled her head and rolled into a section of the bed that had less sunlight shining on it. She rolled over onto something hard, her backbone digging into it as she groaned in pain. "Oh crap…" She whispered as she rolled again, pulling the cell phone from beneath her, she lifted the phone out of her bed and tried to figure out how it had gotten into her bed. She reached to deposit it on the table next to the bed, when the conversation that she had participated in the night before, her face was sore from the phone landing on it, her tirade about breasts, and an eventual crying jag that ended with him humming her gently to sleep. "OH CRAP!" Meredith screamed as she leapt from her bed and ran as quickly as she could out of her room.

Derek lay on the couch, his book on his chest, his head tipped back against the arm of the couch as he snored violently into the air. He was suddenly startled by someone tickling him in his side, his head snapped up and he let out a loud snort as he came face to face with a pair of eyes matching his own. He heard the tender giggle from the little boy and reached his arm out to grab him into his arms. Adam let out an uproarious laugh as he half struggled against Derek and giggled.

"Daddy! Stop tickling! Daddy!" Adam exclaimed as he squealed and laughed in his father's arms. "Daddy!" He said as Derek stopped tickling him and let him lay in his arms. Adam looked up at Derek and smiled, seeing a lonely look in his eyes, he cuddled with his father, burying his head in his chest as he hugged him closely. "I love you, daddy." He said softly as he listened to his father's heartbeat.

"I love you, buddy…" He said as he rubbed his son's back a little, leaning down to kiss his head. "Guess who has the day off today?" He said with a smile as Adam looked up into his eyes.

"Me?" He asked with a giggle and a grin.

"Yes… yes, you do too…" Derek rolled his eyes as Adam laughed. "But so do I." He said with a smile as Adam giggled. "Let's do something fun?" He asked , watching Adam nod happily. "Yeah!" Adam exclaimed as he wiggled from his father's lap and hopped onto the floor. "But first, it's breakfast time!" He said as he took off running into the kitchen, as Derek stood up to follow. He was about to enter the kitchen, when the phone in his hand began to ring. He didn't give himself time to be anxious as he quickly said hello into the line.

"Derek?" Mark said as he listened to his friend's voice in the line.

"Yeah… you left your phone here again." Derek sighed as he rolled his eyes, his hand on the door.

"Sorry… I'll pick it up in a few… I was just wondering where it was."

"Yeah, in the couch…" Derek sighed.

"Thanks, Man… I'll be there in a few."

"Yeah… oh… Mark?"

"Hm…?"

"Meredith called last night." He said, swallowing hard as he bit his lower lip.

"She did? Was she pissed that I didn't call her back?"

"She was upset… don't worry… it's smoothed over." He said softly as he smiled sadly into the line.

"Great." Mark said with a laugh. "I'll give her a call later today." He said. "I'll see you later, buddy."

"Yeah…" Derek said hearing the phone click. "Later, buddy." He sighed as he flipped the phone closed, took a deep breath and walked into the kitchen to get breakfast ready.

* * *

Meredith ran into the living room, her hand gripping her phone tightly as she looked around frantically. She heard the clanging of dishes in the kitchen and ran toward it, looking for something, she wasn't exactly sure what. She entered the kitchen to find Emma standing on the counter, her hands buried deep in the cupboard, her bare feet against the counter as she gripped with her toes, standing precariously.

Meredith ran behind her, and without warning, grabbed her around the waist. With a screech, she kicked suddenly, and realized that it was just her mother as she felt herself slide out of her mother's grip to the floor. She turned around and hopped backwards as her cheeks turned bright red.

"What on earth were you doing on that counter?" Meredith asked, forgetting for a moment the reason she was so worked up, she watched Emma look up at her mother and shake her head.

"I was looking for my favorite bowl…" She said stubbornly as she huffed.

"Your favorite bowl? I was unaware that you had a favorite bowl…"

"Well, I do." She said as she pointed in the cupboard. "It's up there…" She exclaimed.

"Next time, ask please." Meredith said as she reached up into the cupboard and pulled out a blue bowl with pink hearts on it. "Is this the one?"

"Yes." Emma nodded as she held her hands out. "What was I supposed to do? You were sleeping, and I was hungry." She said as she took the bowl from her mother and walked toward the counter. "Sleeping is the most important time of the day…" She said as she set the bowl on the counter and looked toward her mother.

"Who told you that?" Meredith asked with a laugh as she turned toward another cupboard and pulled out a bowl of cereal, and pulled the drawer with the spoons.

"Cristina." Emma shrugged.

"Well, if we all listened to Cristina, then we'd be overworked, unders…leepy… and drunk all the time." She said with a nod as Emma giggled.

Meredith poured cereal into her daughter's bowl and flipped the spoon in her hand, handing it off to her daughter who waited patiently for Meredith to pour the milk in her bowl. "Mommy, why do you do that with the spoon?" Emma asked as Meredith turned from the refrigerator and carried the milk over to her.

"The little flip?" Meredith asked as Emma nodded. "That's a little trick your daddy taught me." She said as she winked and poured the milk into the little girl's bowl.

"You look tired." Emma said, watching her mother cringe a bit as she closed the milk container and walked toward the refrigerator.

"You look tired." Meredith replied as she stuck her tongue out at her daughter as the little girl smiled.

"Were you crying, mommy?" Emma asked as she took a big bite out of her cereal. "Don't fib." She said as a bit of cereal popped out of her mouth and landed on her shirt. She picked it up and put it back in her bowl, looking back at her mother as she munched away.

"First of all… don't talk with your mouth full." Meredith said as she put her own bowl on the counter and gave her daughter a scrutinizing look. "And second of all… no… I wasn't crying, I will have you know." She said with a nod.

"Yes you were, fibber." Emma said as she took another mouthful of cereal into her mouth.

"I am not a fibber!" Meredith said as she poured her cereal into her bowl, she realized that she had put the milk away.

"Uh huh… I heard you crying." Emma nodded. "I looked at the time, and it was three in the morning. Why were you awake at three in the morning?" She asked.

"I wasn't…" Meredith pointed her spoon at her daughter. "I was sleeping… and remind me to take the clock out of your room." She said as she popped cereal into her mouth and ate it dry, watching Emma as she shook her head and ate her cereal. "It must have been a bad dream."

"Musta been." Emma shrugged.

"Where were you? You used to come into my room and give me a hug when I would have a bad dream… you just listened to me crying?" Meredith asked.

"I dunno." She shrugged. "You were crying a lot." Emma sighed. "I… didn't know what to do." She said as she stuck her lip out at her mother and sighed. "Mommy…?" She said as she swallowed hard.

"Hmm…?" Meredith asked as she watched Emma closely as the little girl moved her spoon around in her cereal bowl, capturing the rogue cereal pieces that floated in the milk.

"Do you remember Adam?" Emma asked as Meredith's eyebrows raised at her daughter's question.

"Adam?" Meredith asked as she swallowed hard. "Derek, Adam?"

"Uh huh…" Emma nodded.

"I remember them…him… I remember Adam… He was a very sweet little boy. Why, sweetheart?" Meredith asked as she tilted her head.

"I was just wondering." Emma shrugged as she started to stand up. She grabbed her bowl in her hands and glanced to Meredith. "Did you like Derek?" She asked as she turned her head, watching her mother stare off in front of her for a second as Meredith turned her eyes to face her daughter.

"He was a very thoughtful man." Meredith replied. "He was a very good friend."

"But you're not friends no more…" Emma stated as she put her bowl in the sink and turned toward her mother.

"Honey, I haven't talked to Derek in a long time." She said softly. "Why are you asking me all of these questions?" She asked as Meredith tilted her head.

"Cuz Adam says he doesn't like you." Emma said with a sigh as she looked her mother in the eyes. "I was just wondering if you still liked him." She shrugged as she turned and walked out of the room, leaving her mother in a state of confusion, as she walked off into the living room to watch television.

* * *

Derek walked into the kitchen to find Adam on the floor, half of his body buried in a cupboard as he moved several things aside, making quite the ruckus. "What are you doing?" Derek asked as Adam jumped at the sound of his father's voice.

"Daddy, don't sneak up on me like that…" Adam said as he looked up, his father watching him for a second as he crawled back into the cupboard. "I'm looking for my bowl."

"Your bowl?" Derek asked as he leaned against the cupboard across from his son as he watched the little boy continue to dig through the dishes. "You're making a mess."

"I know." Adam said as he crawled a little farther into the cupboard.

"Do you remember when you used to hide in the cupboards when you were playing hide and seek?" Derek asked as Adam looked up and raised his eyebrow at his father. "You know, when you were a kid…" Derek rolled his eyes.

"I don't fit in there." Adam said as he laughed and rolled his eyes, exactly like his father.

"You used to… you don't remember?"

"Nope." Adam said as he tossed a bowl out of the cupboard. "Oops…"

"Watch it…" Derek said as he walked over and picked up the bowl. "Adam, what bowl are you looking for?"

"The spaceship one, Daddy…" Adam sighed, looking up at Derek with a sad expression.

"You mean this one?" Derek asked as he reached up to a cupboard and pulled a bowl shaped like a spaceship from within it, the little boy's eyes lighting up as he grinned.

"Yes! You were hiding it from me!" Adam exclaimed with a laugh as he jumped up and grabbed the bowl from his father, running toward the counter, he climbed onto the barstool and slammed his bowl down. "Cereal, please!" He exclaimed as Derek smiled at his son's enthusiasm. He walked to the cupboard and pulled the little boy's favorite cereal out, and proceeded to pour it into his bowl. He walked over with the milk, poured it over the cereal, and flipped the spoon in the air, landing it in his hand as Adam smiled. He handed Adam the spoon and sat across from him as the little boy ate.

------------

Meredith followed her daughter out of the room and through the living room. She glanced to the couch where Cristina was still passed out, her head smushed into a pillow, her arm hanging off the edge of the couch as she snored.

"Emma?" Meredith said as the little girl continued to walk away. "Emma?"

"I'm going to miss my cartoons." She said as she started to climb the stairs.

"Emma… please come here?" Meredith asked as she followed the little girl up the steps and down the hallway toward her bedroom. She watched her walk into her bedroom, and climb into her bed as she looked to the bedside table.

"Mommy, where's the controller?" Emma asked as she looked up at Meredith as she stood in the doorway.

"No… no, television, you're ignoring me." Meredith said as she shook her head and stood in front of the television.

"I'm not ignoring you… I said I couldn't come there because my cartoons are on… I want to watch my cartoons…" She said as she moved to the edge of the bed and noticed that the controller was on the floor. "There it is…"

"No, no, no…" Meredith said as she moved around the bed quickly and reached for the controller at the same time as Emma, grabbing it from her reach before she could get it.

"Mommy!" Emma screeched. "No!" She screamed as Meredith turned and put the controller on top of the television out of Emma's reach. "Cartoons!" She screamed as she crawled off the bed and started to jump, trying to reach the controller. Meredith lifted her up and put her on the bed, watching as he rolled around and shouted, throwing a fit for several minutes as Meredith stood above her and crossed her arms. When Emma's screaming fit had finally stopped, and the little girl lay breathless and red faced on the bed, Meredith looked down at her and sighed.

"Are you done with your little fit?" Meredith asked as he little girl pouted.

"No." Emma said as she grumpily glared at her mother. "What do you want?" She asked with a huff as Meredith watched the anger in her eyes. She wanted to ask her about Adam, she wanted to ask her about whether she had seen Derek, she wanted to know what her daughter was talking about, but with the way she was acting, and the pounding in her own head, she didn't have the patience to deal with it. She didn't have the patience, or the heart to deal with the screaming and the yelling, and she had bigger things to deal with, embarrassing herself with Mark. It was bad enough she had to work at the same hospital, but to make a colossal ass out of herself was not typical, and she hadn't even begun to freak out about that yet. With a slow intake of breath she watched her daughter's scowl as she pulled the covers up onto herself, Meredith turned and reached for the controller. She tossed it onto the blankets and turned, walking out of the room to the sound of the television turning on, and just before that, nothing but silence.

---------

Derek sat at the counter with Adam as the little boy ate, his spoon moving quickly to his mouth as he munched on the cereal. "Hey, can we talk?" Derek asked as Adam's eyes met his and the little boy nodded. "You said you saw Emma yesterday?"

"Uh huh." Adam shrugged.

"At the playground?"

"Uh huh…" Adam nodded as he ate.

"Did you talk to her?" Derek asked as he watched Adam's eyes move to the bowl and not meet up with his.

"Yes." Adam replied.

"Was Meredith there?" Derek whispered. "Was she at the park with her mommy?" Derek asked.

"I don't care." Adam said with a shrug. He looked up at Derek and watched his father's eyes. He had remembered that Christmas. He had remembered the disappointment that he had felt when Derek walked away with him. He knew that Meredith didn't come after them, and he figured that she wanted nothing to do with him. He was a very conscientious boy, and he understood that Meredith just didn't want to be his mommy. She didn't love him, and as Derek told him afterwards, she hardly even knew him. He was hurt, and he knew that Derek was hurt that she never called him, so for that, he resented her. "I told Emma that I didn't care, that I didn't like her mommy, and she pushed me." Adam said as he swallowed his last bite of his cereal. "I fell on the ground, and I told her I hated her and I didn't ever want to see her again." He replied. "Then Mark said it was time to go." He said as he held his eyes steady with Derek's.

"You know that wasn't a very nice thing to say… don't you?" Derek whispered.

"I know." Adam said as he put his head down, staring into his bowl of milk. "If I had more time, I would have pushed her down, and told Emma that I never wanted to see her again either." He said with a sigh, as he slid from his barstool, grabbed his rocket ship bowl and walked toward the sink. He tossed it into the sink, turned sharply and left the kitchen, leaving Derek alone and silent.

* * *

Meredith walked down the stairs quickly, preparing to find herself a glass of water and some Tylenol for her splitting headache. She reached the bottom of the stairs and walked across the living room quickly. She glanced to the couch and Cristina was looking at her from her spot on the couch. "Could you two be louder?" Cristina mumbled at her friend as she smacked her lips and looked at Meredith sleepily.

"We were having a discussion." Meredith sighed.

"It sounded like you were trying to murder her." Cristina yawned as she moved her hand to her head, groaning. "You weren't trying to murder her, were you?" She muttered.

"No…" Meredith sighed as she sat on the end of the couch, resting her head in her hands.

"You do realize I wasn't serious, don't you?" Cristina nudged her friend with her foot as she noted Meredith wasn't moving. "Hey…" Cristina said as she sighed. "Hey… what's wrong? I thought the tequila was supposed to make you forget…" she said to her friend as Meredith turned her head and sighed. "What was the screaming fit about?"

"I wanted to talk to her." Meredith sighed. "She didn't want to talk to me… and she wouldn't listen to me."

"What did she want to do?" Cristina asked.

"Watch cartoons." Meredith said, letting her head rest in her hands again, staring at the floor.

"And what is she doing now?" Cristina asked.

"She's watching cartoons." Meredith said as she shook her head.

"So you just let her do what she wanted?" Cristina asked.

"Cristina… would you have rather had her screaming on top of her lungs all day?" Meredith asked as she shook her head. "I think letting her get away with this one thing is a miniscule thing that will have no bearing on her threshold of being spoiled."

"I think that she's passed that threshold." Cristina replied.

"Exactly…" Meredith replied. "My bigger issue would be my little… um… accident last night." Meredith whispered.

"Accident? Did you wet the bed?"

"Worse." She whispered.

"Worse than wetting the bed?"

"Worse than that… yes." Meredith whispered. "I called Mark." She swallowed.

"You called him!?" Cristina asked with an emphatic laugh. "I was kidding!"

"And I did it on accident!" Meredith replied. "I didn't mean to… I was looking at the time… and I dropped the phone… his number must have been the last one I dialed." She whispered.

"So you just called him and apologized and hung up, right?"

"Um…" She swallowed. "I… um… I kind of told him off." Meredith whispered.

"You told him off?" Cristina exclaimed with a laugh. "Meredith! No more tequila for you! I am so proud of you!" She exclaimed with a laugh.

"Except that I accused him of touching boobies… and he had a real page, Cristina. He didn't stand me up… he was being truthful." Meredith said with a sigh as she leaned back on the couch, tipping her head back, she brought her hand to her face as she shook her head.

"Come on… he wasn't mad, was he?" Cris asked as she patted her friend's arm.

"I am such a loser." Meredith whispered as suddenly a very loud crashing sound came from upstairs. It was a gruesome sound that shook the house, crashing loudly into the floor in the room directly above them.

"What the hell was…"

"Emma!" Meredith exclaimed as she leapt from the couch and ran up the stairs, stumbling on the steps, she slammed her knee into one of the steps, yelping in pain as she turned the corner to her bedroom.

Cristina leapt from the couch and ran to the bottom of the stairs, as she suddenly heard the blood curdling scream of her best friend screaming for her to call for an ambulance.

Derek sat on the couch waiting for Adam to get dressed so they could go to the park. He heard the front door open and turned his head to see Mark walking in. "Hey." Mark said as he passed though the threshold of the doorway.

"Phone." Derek said as he tossed the phone over his shoulder.

"Derek!" Mark exclaimed as the phone went flying through the air. Mark missed it, and it fell to the hardwood floor, smashing into several pieces. "Shit! Derek, you broke it!"

"Oh crap, man…" Derek said as he turned his head and looked at the pieces on the floor. "I'll clean that up…"

"Clean it up? I was a little more concerned at the fact that you smashed my cell phone!" Mark said as he picked up the back of the phone and battery from the floor.

"I'll get you a new one… I'm really sorry about that, man…" Derek said as he shook his head and stood up, walking around the couch, he picked up the phone chip and pocketed it while he picked up another piece of the phone. "Here…" Derek said as he handed him the pieces.

"Yeah…" Mark sighed as he shook his head.

Their attention was suddenly pulled to the stairs as Adam bounded down. "M-dawg! Hey! Do you want to go to the park with us?" He asked as he smiled, watching Mark glance to Derek, who shrugged.

"I don't know, man… maybe not today." Mark said as he shrugged.

"It's okay." Adam shrugged. "Daddy and I are going to…" His explanation was interrupted by the shrill sound of Derek's pager. "Uh oh…" He said with a smile.

"Yeah, uh oh…" Derek said as he glanced to the pager and sighed. He made a slight grunting noise as he grabbed the phone and called the hospital.

Mark and Adam watched Derek as he called the hospital, listening carefully as Derek's face went pale as he listened. He asked a couple of questions and hung up the phone. He looked to Mark and Adam and swallowed. "I have to go in." he said as he shook his head, Mark could see he was affected by the phone call. "I…"

"I'll watch Adam." Mark said quickly. "I don't have anything today, I'll watch him… what is it?"

"Six year old girl… broken ribs, collapsed lung… head trauma…" Derek swallowed. "Apparently a television stand fell on her… She was… I… I have to go." Derek said with a trembling voice.

"Go, go…" Mark said.

"Bye, Daddy…" Adam said as he grabbed Derek's hand.

"Bye, buddy…" Derek said as he ran his hand over his son's head. "I owe you a trip to the park…" he said as Adam nodded. "See you later… be good…"

"I will." Adam said as he waved to Derek, as Derek grabbed his keys and his ID from the table next to the door, and ran as quickly as he could toward his car.

* * *

Derek's car swung into the hospital parking lot swiftly, slamming it into park in the trauma parking section, he leapt from his seat and ran in through the back door. As per usual, the trauma portion of the hospital was chaotic, and Derek ran toward the counter quickly, a nurse grabbed a lab coat for him and handed it over to him. "Stacy…" He said quickly as he headed around the counter for the sink, washing his hands quickly as the trauma nurse began to brief him.

"She was brought in three minutes ago… she's been intubated and is still not responding…" The nurse said as Derek grabbed the chart. "She's in room…she's over there…" She said as she pointed down the hallway as Derek rushed down toward the room, the chart beneath his arm as he tossed it to the nurse, entering the room. The feeling in the room was tense, the sounds and scents familiar and comforting to Derek as he walked quickly to the bed to help the other doctors that were trying to get her respond in any way. The little girl looked like a doll lying on the large gurney, her tiny hand hanging off the bed slightly, Derek stepped forward and touched her hand, lifting it onto the bed, he could feel his blood run cold as soon as he saw the face of the little girl on the gurney. "Jesus…" He whispered as a wave of panic rushed from the tips of his toes, shoving its way into his stomach as he felt it twist grotesquely within him.

"Where is her mother?" Derek said as he started to work on her, looking at the extent of her injuries as they removed her neck brace. "Where is her mother!?" Derek screamed as he started barking orders to everyone else, checking her over as he looked at the injuries on her head. "She has a skull fracture, we need to take her in for a CT immediately. I need an MRI and I need it done now! Where is her mother!?" Derek exclaimed as he turned around, his eyes intense and frustrated as the nurse shook her head.

"Her mother was escorted out… she was hysterical… she was hurt and…"

"She was hurt? Get me her status now! NOW!" Derek screamed as the nurse turned and ran from the room as he turned and helped them lift Emma to the transport gurney to take her to the MRI. "I want her monitored extremely closely. "Doctor Sampson, I need Doctor Grey from Mass Gen. on the phone!"

"Doctor Grey?"

"Yes, Doctor Grey! Mass General! What are you looking at me like that for?" He asked as he took off out the door and followed the gurney down the hallway. Derek rushed along the side of the gurney, and looked down at the little girl. Her eyes were closed, and she wasn't moving at all. He called her name as they rushed, his voice was wavering as he touched her hair. "It's going to be okay… it's going to be okay, baby… Emma bear… don't worry… we're going to take good care of you…" As they were approaching the elevator, Derek suddenly heard a loud, horrifying scream from one of the exam rooms. "You will call me if there are any changes." He said to the doctor that was with them, he turned quickly and ran toward the exam room. He could hear a woman screaming loudly, breathless and frustrated.

"I NEED TO BE WITH MY BABY! I NEED MY BABY! LET ME UP! LET ME UP!" The screaming was loud and desperate, it broke him. "Oh God! Oh God, Please! Please let me go to my baby!" She sobbed angrily.

Derek turned the corner. He knew it was Meredith, he could tell, even with the raw desperation in her voice, he knew it was her. He took a deep breath and pulled the curtain aside as he stepped into the room, having no idea what to expect.

Meredith was lying on a gurney trying to sit up, her pant leg had been cut away, her knee was swollen and purple as her head snapped in his direction. "Meredith." He whispered, watching her jaw drop at the sight of him, her screaming stopping as she opened her mouth to shout again, her breath catching in her throat.

"Emma." She squeaked, out of breath and out of struggle, it was all she could say, all she could utter, all that her body would allow. Her arms gave out on her and she flopped back on the bed, it was if the sight of him had kicked any and all resolve from her body.

"I'll be with her." Derek said swiftly, watching as Meredith's screaming fit turned to sobbing. "I'll be with her, and I will send someone for you as soon as I can." Derek said as Meredith sobbed and nodded her head. "Take goddamned good care of her, or you'll be the next one in trauma." Derek growled to the doctor who was trying to examine her as he turned toward the door.

"Derek!" Meredith shouted as he stopped himself from pulling the curtain, he watched her eyes as she shook her head from the gurney. "Tell her that I love her! Tell Emma mommy loves her!" Meredith said as Derek nodded.

"I'll tell her." Derek said as he turned and ran out the door and rushed to Emma's side.

* * *

Derek rushed up the stairs swiftly, taking two steps at a time. He slammed open the door to the floor he wanted to be on and ran as quickly as he could down the hallway. He grabbed hold of the door jamb of the examination room and swung inside. "Is she in there yet?" he asked as the technician looked up.

"They're putting her in right now." The technician said as Derek tried to catch his breath. "She still hasn't woken up."

"She had a pretty bad fall." Derek whispered.

"Pretty bad fall? A television stand fell on the kid." The technician said with a shake of his head. "Stupid incompetent parents…"

"Hey!" Derek exclaimed as he slammed his hand down on the table. "That's enough… that kid is dying in there, don't you dare blame this on her mother." He said angrily as the technician jumped back.

"Um… um, I'm sorry, Doctor Shepherd, I just…"

"Just be quiet and run the scan… What is taking them so long?" He asked as the doctor inside the MRI room looked up at the window, Derek hit the communication button.

"Sir, she's waking up…"

"Shit…" Derek said as he turned and ran from the room, slamming into the room, he watched as Emma's eyes opened wide. "Take the tube out! Take the tube out!" Derek exclaimed as he indicated the tube in her throat. The doctor carefully removed the tube from the little girl's throat, as Derek stood above her. She started to cough. "Whoa there…" Derek said as he put his hand on her head delicately, pushing the hair from her forehead as she looked around with here eyes, Derek stood looking into her eyes as she coughed. He looked up at the other doctor. "She has broken ribs… we need to keep her calm." Just as he said that, she began to cry.

"Mama…" She sobbed. "Mama! Mama!" She gasped, her voice dry and full of terror.

"Hey… hey, princess…" Derek said in a tender voice. "Hey… hey, no crying… no crying, baby…. It's okay… it's okay, baby… shh… shhh… oh… please don't cry…" He whispered.

"Where's my mama? Mama!" She wheezed as she looked back and forth at the doctors with her eyes, in her surprise and shock from waking up in this strange room with these strange doctors, she had panicked a bit, and hadn't even recognized Derek in her panic. "Mama! Mama…" She sobbed.

"Emma bear…" Derek said, watching her eyes focus on him for a moment, her sobbing slowed as she recognized his crystal blue eyes. "That's right… look at me… you see me, baby? He whispered. "Can you see me?"

"Uh huh…" She sniffled.

"You got yourself some pretty bad booboos… don't you, baby?"

"Where's mama?" She whimpered.

"Mama is coming…She'll be here soon…She told me that she loves you very much. She loves you very, very much." Derek said softly. "Do you remember me, Emma bear?" He whispered.

"Derek." She whispered.

"That's right…Derek…you remember me… right?" He whispered.

"Uh huh…" She swallowed. "I want mama, Derek." She said, her voice trembling.

"I know… and we're going to get her for you, okay? But you have to help us first… okay?"

"It hurts…" She mumbled as she tried to move.

"No… no, baby… stay still…" Derek whispered. "You have to stay still…" he said softly. "You were in a pretty big accident… and you have some pretty big boo boos… and um… this here… this machine is a magic machine…" he said softly as he watched her eyes, filled with tears as she tried to remain calm. "And it's going to take your picture, okay? It's going to take your picture so that we can see if you have any booboos that we can't see."

"I'm scared…" She whimpered.

Derek looked to the nurse and doctor that were standing beside him and he reached into his pocket. He pulled his cell phone out and Mark's SIM card from within it. "I need you to do something for me." He said as he turned toward the nurse. "I need you to run… don't walk, don't jog, don't stop for a cup of coffee or a scone… I want you to run… without stopping to this little girl's mother. She's in trauma with Doctor Rabin." He said as he gave the nurse a very serious look. "Tell her to turn on her cell phone, and tell her to answer it. Do you hear me? If she argues… tell her that Derek needs her." He said as the nurse nodded. "Go!" He exclaimed as the nurse started to run down the hallway. "You." He said quickly to the doctor, he handed him the cell phone and the chip from Mark's phone. "Put this in my phone… please." He said, his voice calming as the doctor took the phone from him and Derek looked down at the little girl. "Hey… no crying, sweetheart… no crying for you… you're a tough cookie…" Derek said with a smile as the little girl sniffled and looked up at him with a frightened look.

"Mama…" She whimpered.

Derek looked to his side and the doctor handed back his phone. "Thank you." He said as he turned it on, watched it for a second for a signal. After a moment, it booted up the history of Mark's phone, Meredith's phone number being the first one on the list, he pushed the button. He listened to it ring for a second. "Come on, Meredith…" He mumbled as he heard the click of the phone. "Meredith." Derek said quickly.

"Oh My God… Derek… Derek…" She said with a panicked tone. Derek pushed the speaker phone button and put the phone on the bed beside Emma. "Where is she?" She said, her voice evident that she was in intense pain.

"Mommy!" Emma squeaked.

"Oh my god! Derek! Is that her!"

"That's her…" Derek said softly.

"Mommy!" She exclaimed again.

"She's awake!" Meredith said as she began to cry. "Oh! Baby! Baby, I love you so much! I love you so much!" She sobbed into the phone.

"Mommy, I'm scared!" She exclaimed.

"I know! I know you're scared, baby… Derek is there… Derek will take care of you, princess… he will take care of you until mommy gets there!"

"We're at the MRI." Derek said softly. "We're going to the MRI … CT…"

"How does she look? Is she okay? Oh, God, Derek…" She said, her voice was so full of tension and fear. "I need to call my mother… I need… I need to know what's going on." Meredith said, swallowing hard, she continued to cry.

"I put a call in to your mother." Derek said, as he continued to prepare the machine, looking to the phone as he paused. "I am going to send her the scans… Meredith…" He whispered. "I think… there's a skull fracture… her ribs…at least three of them are broken… We're going to check for internal bleeding and anything else… What happened to you?"

"I fell on the stairs…they think I broke my kneecap…" Meredith sobbed. "Please take care of her… please, Derek… she's all I have!" Meredith exclaimed.

"We're going to do all that we can to have her as good as new." Derek said as he tried to remain calm. Derek watched as Emma's eyes began to droop, her response was lessening. "Meredith, we have to go… I have to get this scan done…"

"Derek… take care of her…" Meredith sobbed. "Please… I love you, Emma… I love you, baby…"

"Love… love you, mama…" Emma mumbled as she began to breathe a little heavier.

"Thank you, Derek… thank you for letting me talk to her…" She said as she continued to cry.

"I'll give you updates…" Derek said as he lifted the phone. He turned it off of speaker and put it to his ear. "Meredith…" He said softly.

"Derek." She mumbled his name as his eyes dropped to the little girl as she began to fade.

"Keep your phone on." He said quickly. "Tell Doctor Rabin to hurry up… I need you." He said as he swallowed hard, slamming the phone closed, he sprang into action in the race to save the precious little girl.

* * *

Meredith was in a state of complete and utter panic. Her daughter was hurt, broken, and there was nothing she could do about it. She had been lying on a gurney sobbing her heart out, wrestling with the doctor to let her go, screaming so that she could see her daughter, hear her voice just one more time, touch her, hold her, kiss her, say she was sorry. From the moment the ambulance arrived at the house, she was no longer in control. The EMTs took the tiny girl from her mother's arms and secured her to a gurney, whisking her away to the ambulance.

Meredith had tried to follow after them, her knee obviously broken, her heart following closely behind as she tried desperately to crawl from the room. She remembered Cristina shouting out instructions, she was a doctor, she would be able to help, because Meredith knew that she, herself was useless, tasting sounds and blood on her lips as the white hot pain shot up her body from her leg, exhausting her as she screamed her daughter's name. Before she could say another word, she was lifted to a gurney, grasping, screaming, trying in vain to kick herself free to find her little girl.

Cristina again, standing over her, trying desperately to get her to stop moving, to stop struggling, to stop screaming for Emma. She said there was head trauma, that her lung had collapsed, and over and over again Meredith saw that stand lying on top of her daughter, the television burst in a million pieces, her tiny lifeless body had been slammed angrily against the floor, the object of her climb clung tightly in her fist.

It was that moment that Meredith looked down at her hand, the object her daughter had sought was now clasped in her own hand, stained with blood, stained with her daughter's innocence, and stained with the knowledge that she knew nothing. She held the object tightly in her hand, squeezing it as she screamed at the doctor to let her go to her daughter, let her go to her baby, when the curtain was pushed to the side frantically, and she had come face to face with a set of eyes that haunted her dreams for as long as she had known those eyes.

He spoke her name and it was if time had stopped and at that moment, his presence sucked every morsel of human strength that she could conjure. She fell backwards on the bed, her screaming ceased, and as if that screaming were the only thing keeping her from breaking completely, she broke.

She clutched the metal spring toy in her hands so tightly, that she could feel it cutting her skin as she was able to utter only one more thing as his crystal blue eyes tore into her soul. "Emma." She had said her name, and his eyes spoke to her that he already knew. They had called him, the hospital had called him. They called him to save her, to protect her, to be with her, and he spoke, not just her name, but the words that she longed to hear. He had made the statement that he would be there for her baby. He spoke those words and she knew deeper than her heart could understand that he wasn't just talking about Emma when he said that he would be there for. He was talking about her. He would be there, and though there was no contact for nearly two years, as soon as their eyes met, she knew that her daughter was in good hands.

He had disappeared out of the room nearly as quickly has he had appeared, the deep blue color of his eyes was gone from her sight, but the image of his panic stricken face was forever etched in her mind as he rushed from that room. She looked down at the object in her hands, the metal toy of which her daughter had been reaching, and looked to the door once again as she realized the connections being made, and the price that she would be paying to have seen them.

The doctor had given her an injection to numb the pain, her leg moving as she threw her head back in agony, clenching her teeth as she tried to tell the difference between the real pain, and the pain in her heart. She quickly realized that there was no difference as the doctor prepared her to be brought for an MRI.

The doctor had called down to radiology, learning that the MRI was being used by a trauma case, Emma. Her little girl. Her poor sweet, innocent little girl was clinging to her life by a thread, and all Meredith could do was lie in the bed, her face wet from the tears and sweat of her breakdown, longing to hear the sweet voice of her baby in her ears, the door opening swiftly, she looked up hoping to see him again, with news that her baby was alright, finding that the nurse walking through was frantic and breathless.

"Phone… phone, Ms. Grey… where is your cell phone?"

"My cell phone?" Meredith panted. "My cell…"

"Doctor Shepherd… he…"

"My pocket… my pocket… here!" She exclaimed as she fumbled with her jeans, pulling the phone from her pocket, she watched the nurse flip it open and push the on button. She waited only a second before the phone began to ring. She grabbed the phone from the nurse and slammed it to her face.

"Meredith." Derek said quickly, his voice was filled with concern, but welcomed in her ear.

"Oh My God… Derek… Derek…" She said with a panicked tone. She listened to the sound of him moving the phone, a clicking sound echoed through the line, and she suddenly began to panic, the pain of her leg was so intense, but the pain in her heart was so much worse.

Then she heard it… the soft, scratchy squeaking voice, it leapt through the phone at an alarming pace, tickling Meredith's eardrum as the weight of everything came crashing down. She wasn't there. She wasn't with her little girl, and Derek's voice sounded so concerned, so scared for her, so scared for both of them, all of them, and there was nothing she could do. She was lying on the gurney of the hospital room talking to her baby, listening to Derek's voice as she clenched her fist tighter around the metal toy in her hand. She told him to take care of her, trusting him with her most valuable possession, the sweet cherubic child that meant the world, and so much more to her, in pain, scared, though certainly not alone.

Her exclamation of love to her echoed in Meredith's ears, her voice was scratchy and so tiny, so lonely, so sad, so frightened, and as Derek had hung up the phone, as he prepared to do his best to keep his promise to her, he whispered three simple words that touched her heart, her soul, and from deep inside of her, she could feel a warmth consuming her body. She lay her head back, closing her eyes as she tried to fend off the pain, she tried to shake the image of her daughter's pain and suffering from her mind, she tried to think of something else, something hopeful, something right, and all that kept presenting itself were his three simple words.

'I need you.'

She had heard it in her mind, again and again as suddenly, she realized it wasn't just her mind anymore. She turned her head, and there he stood, his eyes were filled with tears, his lower lip trembled as he lifted his hand to his head. He scratched just above his ear with his fingertips, watching her turn her head to look at him.

"Meredith." He whimpered.

"Derek." She whispered back, her head shaking slightly as she watched the sorrow in his eyes. "Emma."

"She needs you."

* * *

**_In Naucratis lived a wealthy Greek merchant called Charaxos. He came from a far off land, but had spent most of his life trading with Egypt and in his old age had settled at Naucratis._**

**_One day when he was walking in the marketplace he saw a large and boisterous crowd gathered round the place where the slaves were sold. Out of curiosity he pushed his way to the front and found that everyone was looking at a beautiful girl for sale. Charaxos was bowled over by the sight of this girl. He had never seen anyone so lovely. When the bidding began, Charaxos, being one of the wealthiest merchants in Naucratis, bought the girl without much difficulty._**

Derek watched Meredith as she stared into his eyes. He could feel her heart breaking as he stood there, and wanted to say more, he needed to say more. But the longer that he looked at her, the more words fell from his mind.

He stepped forward toward the bed, glancing to the doctor who was sitting beside her, he shook his head. "Doctor Rabin, I need to take her with me." Derek said. The strength in his voice was faltering with each word, though he remained stoic in his stance. He stood beside the bed, and reached across to Meredith, looking for her hand, he found that one was free, the other was grasping hold of something tightly. "I need her to come with me… to her daughter." He said as he stared at her hand for a moment, contemplating taking it into his own.

He turned as the door opened, and one of the nurses stepped in with a wheelchair. Derek turned around, he walked toward the nurse and took the wheelchair, thanking her for bringing it to him, he wheeled it toward the bed.

"Derek…" Meredith whispered.

"We'll talk about it on our way there… she's sleeping." He whispered as she looked up at him. He and the doctor were able to lift her to the wheelchair, her leg was propped up, the nurse handed him an ice pack as he placed it delicately on her knee, speaking no words, only providing her with silent comfort. She tried to look into his eyes, finding that he was hiding them from hers, moving constantly as he tried to make her comfortable in the chair. He walked behind the wheelchair, making his avoidance of her eyes easier as he began to push the wheelchair toward the door.

The nurse opened the door, ushering them into the hallway, as Derek nodded. Derek wheeled her down toward the elevator, his tender steps were like a march to the electric chair, the lonely sadness hanging in the air like a cobweb, distressed and stretched out of shape, out of place, forgotten and sorrowful. He took a slow deep breath. "We did an MRI… CT." He said as he stopped in front of the elevator. He stepped forward and pushed the button. "No organ injury… no internal bleeding… her lungs look alright, though she does have three broken ribs." Derek said softly as he turned slowly. His eyes met hers as he swallowed. "She has a depressed skull fracture in the back of her head." He whispered.

"Oh…God…" Meredith whimpered.

"It's not horribly deep, but it's going to require surgery." He said as the elevator door opened.

"Derek…" She whimpered.

"We need to remove the fragments and repair the skull…"

"What about…?"

"Brain damage? There's no saying at this point if there has been any damage… she was communicating with us before the MRI… and she has since fallen asleep, her vitals are normal under the circumstances, but we know she's in incredible pain." Derek said as he tried to remain strong in his explanation. He walked around to the back of the wheelchair and took hold of the handles. He pulled the wheelchair into the elevator.

"Derek…" She whispered.

"Our primary goal is to remove the skull fragments, replace the damaged portion. We want to ensure there is no bleeding in her brain… monitor the extent of the injury, make sure that there hasn't been any soft tissue damage." He said softly. "She's going to be alright." He said softly. "We're taking very good care of her." He said softly as they rode the elevator, Derek's eyes staring at the numbers on the side of the elevator as they rode it quietly. He wanted to tell her more, but he stopped himself. He wasn't even positive that he hadn't said too much already, so he remained quiet.

She watched him closely, the way that he stood to the side of her, his eyes plastered to the tiny box above the doors to the elevator, the way he clenched his fist at his side, the way he chewed his lower lip just slightly, pushing it out again with his tongue as if he were reminding himself time and time again that he had to remain strong. She moved her head slightly, her eyes moving to the object in her hand, she felt her hand clench it tightly.

The door to the elevator opened, and Derek moved to push the wheelchair out. He was silent as he pulled her down the hallway, Meredith could feel the tension following them as it clenched her stomach angrily. "Wait." Meredith said as they arrived at the room, Derek was prepared to bring her through the door, when she reached back and grabbed his hand on the handle. "Wait a second… just… just… hang on…" She said as she paused.

"Meredith…" Derek said softly, almost impatiently as he paused, his back against the door as he peered in through the window of the ICU room.

"You're not going to perform the surgery." She shook her head.

"Meredith, I'm the top neurosurgeon here… of course I'm going to be the one to…"

"No…" Meredith shook her head. "No, you… you can't do it, Derek… you're too attached to it." She said as she shook her head. "You can't do this… Derek."

"I'm fine, Meredith. I'm a professional." Derek said as he took a slow, deep breath. "I'm a professional, and I can take care of this. I'm going to save your daughter… and then you can get on with your life." He said as he pushed backwards on the door, pulling Meredith in with him as he turned her around to face the bed.

The moment her eyes grazed the bed, Meredith felt as if all of the air had been sucked out of the room. Her tiny daughter lie motionless, covered with a white, sterile hospital blanket, her head was bandaged, her lips dry and chapped, her eyes closed tightly as she lie peacefully. She could feel herself taking short intakes of breath, very quickly, and her eyes never left the tiny form on the bed. She stared, the color draining from her face, her hands trembling as she sensed someone was touching her hand. She turned her head and found Derek crouched beside her, talking to her, but she couldn't hear him, all she could feel was the breaths coming from her chest, the sound of the blood rushing in her ears. "No." She gasped.

"Meredith… you have to breathe."

"No… no…. No, you are… you can't… no." She said as she breathed. "Oh God… Oh God… Oh, God…"

"Meredith, you have to slow down… stop breathing like that, you're going to hyperventilate… Meredith…" Derek said as he lifted his hand, and very tenderly touched her cheek. "Meredith." He whispered. "Meredith." He said softly.

"Is she stable?" Meredith whispered.

"Yes."

"Can I have a moment alone with her?" She swallowed.

"You…"

"I need to be alone with her, Derek." She whispered. "Thank… you… for helping her." She said, watching his eyes as they moved toward the little girl. "I just… need to be alone with her right now."

"We should get her to surgery as soon as we can, Meredith." He whispered.

"I know." She whispered.

Derek watched her eyes for a moment, the cold steely stare that she was giving him was reminiscent of another Grey woman that he knew, and frankly despised. He wanted to say something to her, ask her if she ever thought of him during those months, but he could see by the look her eyes that she had not. He could feel in her icy stare that she hadn't needed him then, and she didn't need him now. He nodded, turned sharply and walked out of the room without another word.

**_Her name was Rodophis. She'd been kidnapped by pirates as a child from her home in northern Greece. She'd been sold to a rich man who employed many slaves on the island of Samos and had spent most of her childhood there. But when she grew up her master wished to make some money out of so beautiful a girl and sent her to Naucratis to be sold._**

**_Charaxos was so moved by her story he gave her a house of her own to live in with a garden and slave girls to attend on her. Indeed he became quite besotted with her. He gave her presents of jewels and beautiful clothes and spoiled her as if she had been his own daughter.  
_**

Derek stepped out into the hallway and walked quickly toward the elevator. He slammed his hand into the button several times as he tried to hold his composure for just another moment. As the elevator doors opened slowly, he reached his hand in and pushed the doors open forcefully as he walked in and slammed his hand down on the 'door close' button. He pressed it again and again as he took slow, deep breaths trying desperately not to break down. He sucked in another sharp breath and after just another moment, the doors closed fully. He then slammed his fist down on the emergency stop button, hearing the bell of the elevator ringing relentlessly. He released the breath he had been holding as the elevator doors opened, and he sucked in another breath as he clenched his fists, closed his eyes tightly and fell to his knees. He found that he had completely lost control of his emotions, his body shaking and trembling violently as he began to sob in heartbreaking waves as the shrill note of the elevator alarm screeched uncaringly into his ears.

**_One day, in her secret garden, a strange thing happened; Rodophis was bathing in the pool and the slave-girls were holding her clothes, her jeweled girdle and her rose-red slippers of which she was particularly fond. Suddenly an eagle came swooping down out of the clear blue sky as if to attack the little group. The slave-girls dropped everything and fled shrieking to hide among the trees and flowers of the garden. Rodophis stood startled, unable to move._**

**_But the eagle paid no attention to any of them. Instead, it picked up one of her rose-red slippers in its talons and soared high into the air carrying the slipper.  
_**

Derek stepped from the elevator on the floor he had boarded it, several doctors and nurses that passed noticed the tremble in the doctor's stance, the slightly out of the normal glint in his eye as he stepped into the hallway and stood for a moment staring down toward the room where Meredith and Emma were. He had screamed his heart out in that elevator and cried every tear that he could conjure. He was emotionally drained and he had tried to convince himself that he was going to be just fine.

He thought of Meredith sitting in that room, telling him that he was too connected to the case, too close to Emma, too attached. How could he be attached? He hardly knew the child, he hardly knew her mother. All he knew was her name, her favorite color was pink, and that she knew the story 'A visit from Saint Nicholas.' No, he didn't know her. There was no attachment. She was a tiny, innocent girl that had gotten in over her head. She got into an accident, and there was absolutely no connection between him and her mother, there was no connection between he and that little girl.

Except that there was.

He had felt his heart drop like a boulder when he had seen that little girl's face. He had panicked like a parent, not like a doctor. He had defended her, her mother. He had shouted at the doctors and nurses like he had never done before. He was being vigilant in saving her, and he was blind to anything other than that. He stood in the hallway, staring at the room, feeling his body trembling as he tried desperately to control the fear in his body, the anxiety, the pain. He couldn't walk into that room a simpering mess. He had to walk into that room strong and confident. He had to walk into that room with a purpose, with a reason, with… love?

His eyes dropped to the floor.

He turned his head toward the nurse's desk and he took a slow deep breath. He took a step, and before he could think twice, his feet were moving quickly toward the counter. "I need consent forms for Emma McKennon's mother to sign." Derek said as he watched the nurse nod. "Insurance forms, admission forms… and consent to surgery, and anesthesia. I need a full surgical work up on her, please don't miss anything…" He said politely, trying very hard to remain calm. "I um… her grandmother will be here soon… Ellis Grey. When she gets here, please direct her to Emma's room." He said as the nurse nodded. She took a step toward the hallway with the papers and Derek held his hand out. "I'll… give her the forms... I'll do that for you." Derek said with a slight nod as the nurse tilted her head. "It's fine." He said. "I'll just give them to her… and she'll bring them back out when she's through filling them out." He said as the nurse handed him the clipboard. He thanked her and turned for the room.

Just before he entered the room, he peered into the window, watching as Meredith tenderly touched her daughter's hand, her lips were pursed, her eyes were filled with an intense worry that only a mother could express and feel, and when he walked through the room, that look of worry was on him.

"Meredith, these are the consent forms… insurance forms, and some brochures on the procedure. You're going to want to fill out the…"

"Derek." Meredith said, her voice was slightly stronger as she watched his eyes widen slightly as he listened. "I don't want you to perform the surgery." She said as she shook her head. She watched him pause. "I want another surgeon."

"Meredith, stop being stubborn about this." He said as she tilted her head.

"Is that how you talk to patient's, Doctor Shepherd?" Meredith asked as Derek's mouth opened slightly. "Is that how you talk to a grieving mother? You tell them not to be stubborn about this? You're too close to this case, Derek. You're too close… she's a little girl… I know you have a little boy at home. How do I know that you're not reacting as if this were Adam? You know Emma, Derek… you know her, and you're too emotionally attached to her to deal with this properly! I don't want you in there! I don't even want you touching her! I want you to leave, and I don't want you to come back into this room!"

"Mrs. McKennon!" Derek exclaimed as he got her attention. She stopped as she stared at him, her mouth opened and closed as he stared at her. "I've tried to be polite to you about this, and I've tried to be professional… and if anyone is letting their personal attachment cause any road blocks in the treatment of your daughter, it's you!" He exclaimed. "You are denying your child the care that she needs to get better because of some personal emotional issues that you have with me! I get that you hate me, Meredith… I get it, okay? But I think it's time that you stop acting like a selfish fool and let me do my goddamned job!"

"I'm selfish? I'm selfish? You're the selfish one! You're the one trying to get your way in this situation! I thought you were different! I thought you'd understand! You're just a typical surgeon with a God complex! I wish I had never met you, Derek Shepherd! I wish that I had never seen your stupid face! If I hadn't met you, then we wouldn't be in this situation! We wouldn't be having this argument! You… you… This is your fault!" She screeched, her voice was loud and shrill and tears were rolling down her face as she watched him stare at her in astonishment.

"My fault? This is my fault?" He asked as she nodded her head. She held her hand up, the silver slinky toy was gripped tightly in her fingers as Derek's eyes widened at the sight of it.

"Do you see this, Derek? Do you see this? This was something that YOU gave me! This was something that YOU had touched with YOUR hands and you gave ME! IT was in MY house! It was on top of the television stand, Derek! Do you understand what I'm saying?" She huffed angrily "IT WAS IN MY DAUGHTER'S HAND WHEN SHE FELL, DEREK!" Meredith screamed. "It's covered with HER blood! YOU did this to her! She was reaching for this, and she fell and cracked her head open, Derek! You are the reason my daughter is in this room, and YOU'RE the reason she needs this surgery! SO DON'T YOU DARE TELL ME THAT THIS IS NOT YOUR FAULT! DON'T YOU DARE TELL ME THAT YOU'RE NOT CONNECTED TO THIS CASE! I WANT ANOTHER SURGEON!" She screamed as her face turned bright red, her eyes filled with tears as Derek stood and stared at the anger and hatred in her eyes. He held the clipboard in his hands tightly, his knuckles were turning white as he gripped the clipboard in his fingers. He really wanted to yell back, he really needed to fight back, but he had nothing.

Nothing.

He turned the clipboard in his hands and looked Meredith directly in the eyes as he refused to react. "Sign the forms." He said in a monotone voice. "Sign the forms and give them to the nurse. Emma's surgery is in three hours… whether I'm there or not." He whispered as he dropped the clipboard into her lap. He pulled a pen from his pocket and dropped it on top of it as he turned and walked out of the room.

Meredith watched as he left the room silently, the stone look on his face gave her chills. She was now alone in the large hospital room, her daughter's hand still in hers as she slowly picked up the pen when she felt her daughter's hand move in hers. She turned her head to see those two beautiful gray-green eyes staring up at her. "Mama." She whispered.

"Baby…" Meredith whispered as she felt the tears in her eyes start to fall down her cheeks.

"I want my candy necklace…" She mumbled sleepily, her eyes fluttering closed as she smacked her lips slightly.

"Your candy necklace?" She whispered as she gripped Emma's hand tightly and moved herself as close as she could, cringing at the pain in her leg as the medication seemed to be wearing thin. "What candy necklace, baby?"

"I want my candy necklace… mama…" She whispered. "On the tv… can you get it for me?" She whispered as she turned her head slightly, drifting back to sleep. Meredith sat for a moment as she tried to figure out what she was talking about. She chewed her lower lip for a moment as she suddenly remembered. Three days earlier, Emma had a candy necklace. She had gotten it from a friend, at a party. It was close to dinner, and Meredith didn't want her to be eating candy, so she had taken it from Emma's neck and promised to give it back later. She had placed it in the packaging, and put it on the television stand.

The television stand.

Candy necklace.

Meredith could picture it in her mind, her little girl climbing from the bed, remembering her candy prize that she had placed on top of the wooden stand. Mostly the top of the television stand had been for objects to keep from Emma's reach. A statuette from her grandmother, a baby shoe, a small snow globe that she had gotten while visiting the zoo, a picture of Emma… the gift from Derek.

Derek.

She had placed that candy necklace right next to the slinky… she could see in her mind's eye, the teetering television stand, the little girl gripping it for all she could, her scream as it fell, her hand grasping for something, anything, landing on that metal toy, she held onto it with all of her strength as the stand and television came crashing down on her.

As the world came crashing down on her mother.

**_Rodophis wept at the loss of her rose-red slipper, feeling sure that she would never see it again. She regretted losing anything the kindly Charaxos had given her._**

**_However, the eagle had been sent by the god Horus, the son of Isis and Osiris, whose sacred bird it was. The bird flew straight up the Nile to Memphis to the palace of Pharaoh Amasis while he sat in the great courtyard giving justice to his people and hearing any complaints they wished to bring._**

**_The Eagle flew into the great courtyard and dropped the rose-red slipper of Rodophis right into Pharaoh's lap.  
_**

Derek walked down the hallway toward an on call room. He turned the corner and opened the door, stepping inside, he slammed the door and released the breath he had been holding. Meredith's words slammed into his soul sharply, stinging him everywhere as he gritted his teeth and grunted. He would have cried if he had any tears left. Instead, she had left him angry and frustrated, hurt and nearly broken as he vowed to himself that there was no way that she would get away with hurting him this way.

He needed to be in that room with Emma. He had promised her. He had promised her mother.

Derek pulled his phone from his pocket and dialed his home phone number. He waited for a moment as he listened it to it ring. He heard someone pick up and, after a second, his son's happy voice squeaked over the phone.

"Hello?"

"Hey Adam." Derek said softly, his voice was nearly trembling as he spoke. "Can you please give the phone to Mark?"

"Did you save the little girl?" Adam asked.

"Adam… not now, buddy… I'm still working on it." He said as he tried to keep his breathing normal, his mind on task. "Can I talk to Mark please?"

"Sure." Adam said as he smiled into the line. "I love you, Daddy."

"I love you, Adam." Derek replied softly as he waited for Mark to come to the phone. After a moment, he heard Mark's greeting over the line, and he sighed.

"Hey."

"Mark… It's going to be a long day… and it's probably going to be a long night." Derek sighed. "Can you please take Adam to Beth's house? I'll call her and let her know he's coming… but this case is a lot more complicated that I thought it would be." He said softly, his voice turning into a whisper.

"Hey, Man… are you alright?" Mark asked.

"I'm fine." Derek replied.

"It's a kid… you're probably just freaking out about that."

"I'm not freaking out, Mark. I'm fine… She has a skull fracture. I'm going to have to perform the surgery in a couple of hours… She's going to be fine." He whispered.

"She is going to be fine." Mark said softly. "You're the best there is." He said with a supportive smile.

"Thanks, Mark…"

"Hey, everyone needs a cheerleader… If you want, I'll…"

"Mark." Derek said bluntly as Mark stopped his joke. "Not now."

"Are you sure you're alright?"

"I'm fine." Derek said softly. "I'll call Beth. Thanks for keeping an eye on Adam."

"It's no problem." Mark said softly. "I'll … see you around."

"See you around." Derek said with a nod as he flipped the phone closed. He took a slow, painful deep breath as he shoved the phone in his pocket and stood in the room for several minutes. He tried to regulate his breathing, tried to calm down, tried to get her voice out of his head. He could just picture the little girl climbing onto the television stand, trying to get to that toy. He could picture the teetering stand as she realized that it wouldn't hold her weight, the crash that ensued. He could hear her scream. He could hear Meredith's scream.

Meredith's voice.

Derek paused as he swallowed, he checked his watch and noted that it had been plenty of time for her to complete the paperwork. He wasn't about to go into that room again. He wasn't ready to be screamed at again, blamed. He took a slow, deep breath and walked out into the hallway. He walked down toward the nurse's desk and stopped as he reached it. The nurse looked up at Derek and reached out her hand for him to sign a paper.

"Doctor Shepherd… Emma McKennon's paperwork is being put through… she should be ready to be prepped for surgery shortly."

"Her mother got you the papers?" Derek asked.

"Doctor Grey faxed Emma's records from Boston… and Mrs. McKennon filled out the consent form and admission paperwork."

"She didn't say anything about a choice of surgeon?"

"Yes sir, she did." The nurse said as she looked up into his eyes. "You, of course." She said with a smile, giving him a look that made him feel almost silly for asking, as he took a slow, deep breath.

"Um… I'm going to be looking over her scans again… in about twenty minutes, I need Doctor Redson here to prep her for surgery, I need her put on the board."

"Yes, sir." The nurse nodded as Derek turned to walk down the hallway. He paused for only a split second outside Emma's door, as he looked in to see Meredith sitting beside her daughter's bed with their hands clasped together, before he turned and made his way back down the hallway toward the elevators.

**_The people cried out in surprise when they saw this, and Amasis, startled by this unusual incident, picked up the little rose-red slipper and admired the delicate workmanship and the tiny size of it. After examining the slipper he thought the girl for whose foot it was made must certainly be one of the loveliest in the world._**

**_Indeed Amasis believed this to be an omen and a message from the gods so he issued a decree 'Let my messengers go forth through all the cities of Egypt and to the very borders of my kingdom. Let them take with them this rose-red slipper which the divine bird of Horus has brought to me, and let them declare that the girl from whose foot this slipper came, shall be the bride of Pharaoh!'_**

**_So they set forth from Memphis and went by way of Heliopolis and Tanis and Canopus until eventually they came to Naucratis. Here they heard of the rich merchant Charaxos and of how he had bought the beautiful Greek girl in the slave market, and how he was lavishing all his wealth upon her as if she had been a princess put in his care by the gods.  
_**

It was nearly three hours later and Derek found himself standing in the scrub room for the operating room. He hadn't see or talked to anyone since he had stepped away from the counter with Emma's chart. He was trying his hardest to become focused on the task at hand, on saving the life of the tiny girl who was in that operating room.

He scrubbed his hands thoroughly, his thoughts and eyes shifting to the movement in the operating room. The bed was huge compared to the occupant who lay within it. Her beautiful hair had been clipped away, her eyes were closed. She was sleeping so quietly, so peacefully against the itchy hospital bed, her tiny gown covering her little shoulders, covered in pink and yellow rabbits. He watched her lie there as they prepared, the procedure moving through his mind as if it were a routine procedure that he performed nearly every day. And though it was a procedure that he did perform nearly every day, it was still completely different.

This was someone he loved.

When he was in the lab earlier, he did some thinking about what Meredith was trying to say to him, and he did admit to her that she was right on one thing. He was incredibly close to the case. This little girl that was now before him, lying sleeping on that gurney was one that he had held, one that he had laughed with, talked with. This was someone that he did care about very deeply, someone that he had cried for and prayed for, someone that he loved.

Loves.

Derek looked down at his hands as he continued to wash them, scrubbing them thoroughly as he noticed there was another person in the room. He felt the person's presence, and when the person stepped up to the scrub sink, he still hadn't looked over, just continued to stare out at the tiny little girl.

"I think you've scrubbed away a good portion of your skin there, Doctor Shepherd." The person beside him spoke, and he immediately recognized it. He turned his head to the side and lifted his foot from the sink's pedal, holding his hands up.

"Doctor Grey." Derek said as he nodded toward her, walking toward the towels as he nodded at his scrub nurse to enter the room.

Ellis held her hand up for a moment, the scrub nurse pausing as Derek nodded to let her know that it would be another minute. "Thank you for calling me." She said softly.

"I thought that you would want to be informed." Derek nodded.

"I appreciate it." She said softly. "My relationship with my daughter has not always been ideal, though I feel as if I had connected with her over the past year and a half. It does feel good to have a family." She said softly. Derek remained quiet as he looked at her, and glanced back into the operating room.

"I need to get in there."

"Wait." Ellis said as she sighed. "Dr. Shepherd… Meredith has missed you."

"Doctor Grey. Meredith isn't on my table… this isn't about Meredith, this is about Emma." He said as he tried to pass her. She stood in his way and shook her head.

"Doctor Shepherd, please listen to me." Ellis said as he paused for a moment.

"I don't have time for this, Doctor Grey. I have to save Emma… Meredith doesn't need me. She has never needed me. I met her that day on accident… and our friendship is an accident… it's not even a friendship, she's an acquaintance. Emma… Emma is my friend… because friends don't judge… Friends don't say awful things… and friends don't break your heart." He said angrily. "Friends trust you." He said as he looked into Ellis' eyes. "Emma trusts me… and I am not about to let her down." He said as he pushed backwards on the door with his back.

"Doctor Shepherd… if she didn't trust you, she would be in here right now telling you not to do this!" Ellis said as Derek listened to her through the door as the scrub nurse put on his gloves. "If she didn't trust you, she wouldn't be sitting in her daughter's room waiting for you to bring her to her! If she didn't trust you, you wouldn't be in that room, Doctor Shepherd! Don't let her push you away again, Derek!" Ellis exclaimed as Derek seemingly ignored the older woman as she watched him step up to Emma and talk to the nurses.

What Ellis didn't know, was that all of her words had seeped into his mind, all of her words were echoing in his head, all of her words touched him, and as he started this surgery, with a call for luck and a soft, silent prayer, the surgery began.

**_So they went to the great house beside the Nile and found Rodophis in the secret garden beside the pool._**

**_When they showed her the rose-red slipper she cried out in surprise that it was hers. She held out her foot so that they could see how well it fitted her; and she bade one of the slave girls fetch the other slipper._**

**_Then the messengers knew this was the girl whom Pharaoh had sent them to find, and they knelt before her and said, "Pharaoh Amasis - life, health, strength be to him - bids you come with all speed to his palace at Memphis. There you shall be treated with all honors and given a high place in his Royal House of Women."_**

**_Such a command could not be disobeyed so Rodophis bade farewell to Charaxos, who was torn between joy at her good fortune and sorrow at his loss, and set out for Memphis.  
_**

As the first cut was made, and all thoughts were on the little girl before him, Derek began to speak softly, tenderly as he began to recite a story. It was a story that his wife had once told their unborn child, a story of love and loss, and finding love again. It was an Egyptian tale that was rooted in the traditional style of any fairy tale, and it rolled from his lips as his wife spoke the words in his mind. The surgery moved along nicely, the little girl's injuries were repaired as quickly and as perfectly as they could be done as Derek made each movement with such care and such circumstance, that there was no doubt that she would be alright.

His voice was soft and gentle beneath his mask as he told each section of the story, a smile on his lips as he spoke, a warmth in his heart as he thought of the little girl's smile. He completed the fix to her skull, closing up and beginning to bandage her head, he paused.

"And when Amasis saw her beauty… he was sure that the gods had sent her to him." Derek paused. "And, instead of merely taking her to his Royal House of Women; he made her his queen, and the Royal Lady of Egypt." He said tenderly as he completed the bandage wrapping, looking down on the sleeping child's face.

"They lived happily ever after, Emma…" He whispered. "For the rest of their lives." He said as he paused, looking up at the nurses and doctors that surrounded him. "I think we're finished here…" He said softly as he looked down at the sleeping little girl. "We did well, Emma bear…" Derek said softly. "Let's get you back to mommy…" He said, as he took a step backwards, put his head down, and headed quietly toward the scrub room.

* * *

Derek stood in an empty exam room, his eyes were grazing over the chart as he tried desperately to concentrate. It was nearly seven o'clock in the evening, the surgery had been completed nearly two hours earlier, and he still hadn't worked up the nerve to walk into that room. He had advised the nurses to tell Meredith and Doctor Grey that he would be in to explain how the procedure went, and promptly made his way to a quiet room where he could sit and pore over his notes, ensuring that every 'I' was dotted, and every 't' was crossed. He glanced up as the door opened, and a nurse popped her head into the room.

"Doctor Shepherd, Mrs. McKennon is asking for the status report." She said softly as Derek nodded.

"I'll be right in, Stacy… thank you." Derek nodded as he flipped the chart closed and sighed deeply as he slid himself from the exam table where he had been lying. He walked across to the door and opened it slowly, glancing down the hall to make sure it was clear. He began to walk toward the room. He stepped closer to the room and as he approached it, he could feel his heart beating faster, he could feel his throat closing up, his pulse racing. He started to turn back around, when the door opened and he heard someone calling to him. The sound of the blood in his ears was deafening as he turned around and saw Ellis standing just outside the door. She allowed it to close behind her as she took a step toward him.

"Doctor Shepherd?" She inquired as she watched him stand on his heels as if he were trying to find a good moment to turn and run screaming down the hallway.

"Doctor Grey…" Derek said softly as he flipped the chart in his hands closed.

"Were you on your way in?" She asked, glancing back to the room. "She's still sleeping… and her vitals appear normal. Meredith was hoping that you'd be in to explain how the surgery went." She said softly.

"I was just on my way in." Derek nodded.

"It looked to me like you were about to walk away." She said as she watched Derek's eyes drop. "Doctor Shepherd… I understand that this was hard on you as well, Meredith will listen. She trusts you." Ellis said as she reached for the door handle.

"Appearances can be deceiving, Doctor Grey." Derek whispered. "I never walk away." he said as he nodded, watching Ellis nod her head and turn, walking back into the room. Derek stood as he stared at the room, his pulse slowly beginning to regulate as he looked back down at the chart, staring at Emma's name. "Stop being such a baby, Shepherd." He whispered to himself as he very quickly walked toward the room. He lifted his head and stepped inside.

As soon as he walked into the room, he visually interpreted the number of people in the room without actually looking at anyone's face. Meredith was still sitting in a wheelchair, it appeared in the same one that he had tenderly placed her in, hours before. There was a new person in the room, Derek supposed it was a friend, she was quiet, though her stare was attempting to be intimidating, and there was Doctor Ellis Grey, whose stare was intimidating, and who never remained quiet.

"First, I'd like to apologize for taking so long for getting in here…" Derek said as he shrugged a little. "I had another page after Emma's surgery, that I had to take care of." He lied, but he didn't think that it would hurt the situation. He figured that it was better than telling them that he had been wallowing in self pity on an exam room table for the past two hours while they sat and waited for a status report. "I'd like to start the report by saying…" He said as he lifted his eyes slowly from the chart as he suddenly realized that everyone in the room was silent. He began to feel nervous, knowing that he was the only one on the 'stage' in front of these people, this one person, he didn't want to disappoint.

His eyes passed from Ellis, who stared expectantly, to the guest, who stared angrily, and he nearly avoided Meredith's, as his crystal blue eyes swept over her broken, sad appearance. Her eyes were filled with tears, and her lip was trembling in sadness as their eyes locked. He had known that she meant no malice with her words, though he knew they had broken him inside. She needed him to see, she needed him to know his connection with her, because she really thought that he truly didn't understand.

He watched as she slowly lifted her hand to him, beckoning him to come closer, because she obviously couldn't move from the wheelchair. "Derek…" She whimpered as she watched him playing it in his mind, the hateful things that she said to him, the blame and guilt that she had put on his shoulders. He made the decision to reach for her hand, to support her, and as he reached his hand to touch hers, the door burst open.

"Daddy!" Adam exclaimed in happiness as Derek turned sharply to come face to face with his son. "I saw you come into this room, and…" He stopped.

Derek's eyes were wide, and he couldn't say a word.

"Oh my God." Adam whispered as his eyes scanned the room. The familiar, broken face of Meredith sitting in a wheelchair, a tiny girl sleeping on the bed, bandaged and sleeping, could only be Emma, and his father holding a clipboard.

Mark caught up to Adam and swung into the room quickly. "Derek, man… I'm sorry… he saw you when you went into the…" Mark's eyes passed to Meredith, the bed, the situation. "Meredith?"

Suddenly, without a moment's passing, Derek scooped his son under his arm and handed the chart to Ellis. "Doctor Grey…" He said as Ellis nodded. "Excuse me." He said as he turned toward Meredith. Adam was shouting question after question, but Derek couldn't understand a word he was saying. His eyes were caught by Meredith's as the sight of Adam sent a barrage of tears down her cheeks, and she began to cry. So quickly, without thinking of company or consequences, Derek leaned down tenderly, his son struggling in his arms and he placed his other hand on Meredith's cheek. He leaned in as her eyes continued to lock with his, until he watched them close just as his lips touched hers. It was a tender kiss, a soft kiss, an apologizing kiss, a kiss that told her that he wasn't going to walk away, he just needed to take care of something, and that he'd be back to finish what he started when he returned. "Meredith…" he whispered as he pulled from her lips, he watched her nod slightly as her eyes locked with his again, and he turned with his writhing, upset son in his arms as he walked out of the room, pulling a shocked and confused Mark along with him.

-----------------

As the door closed behind him, Meredith watched as the two men and the little boy disappeared from sight. A slight smile rose on her lips as she reached her fingertips to touch them.

"What the hell was that?" Cristina asked as she glanced from the door to her friend, and back to the door.

"That…" Meredith said with a slight shake of her head. "That was Derek Shepherd." She whispered as she continued to touch her lips with the tips of her fingertips.

Derek walked swiftly down the hallway, his son tucked neatly under his arm as the little boy struggled and continued to ask questions as Mark followed them down the hallway and around the corner into the same quiet, dark exam room that Derek had been resting in just minutes earlier. Derek switched on the light and carefully set his son to the floor, Adam turned swiftly and reached for the handle as Derek shoved his foot into the bottom of it to keep it from opening as Adam pulled on the door, gritting his teeth.

"Daddy, I have to go! I have to go! I have to go!" He exclaimed as he pulled on the door handle.

"You don't have to go anywhere." Derek said as he watched Mark start to pace back and forth.

"What the hell was that?" Mark asked as Derek looked up at his friend and tilted his head.

"Mark." Derek said, nodding toward Adam as the little boy continued to pull on the door handle.

"He's not even listening…" Mark mumbled. "But seriously, Derek… what the hell is going on here?"

"What do you mean what is going on here? I was trying to give a status report to a family, and you and Adam came running in there like a couple of gang busters… what is going on with you? I thought you were bringing him to Beth's…" Derek said as he swung his son up into his arms and felt the little boy tapping him repetitively in the shoulder as he continued to mutter 'daddy' at Derek. "Hang on a second."

"I was going to bring him to Beth's." Mark said. "And I did… but someone forgot to call her and tell her that I was doing that, otherwise, I would have gotten a head's up that Beth and everyone were going out tonight to celebrate your nephew's birthday, and they didn't have room for one more… so I have had Adam all day long."

"You've had him all day? Why didn't you call me, or page me, or anything?"

"You seemed upset about the case you were paged in for, so I just figured I'd keep him with me…and I tried to call your cell phone… it didn't work…"

"Oh, crap, yeah…" Derek said as he pulled the cell phone out of his pocket and tossed it to Mark. "Your SIM card is in my phone… you can have it back now."

"You stole my SIM card?" He asked as he grabbed the phone and started to pull out the battery to access it. "Why would you…?" He said as he looked up at Derek and gave him a confused glance. "Meredith?"

"I had my reasons, Mark." He said as he lifted Adam to the floor again as the little boy seemed to have calmed down.

"You know her?"

"I knew her… I… yes." Derek nodded.

"Daddy!" Adam exclaimed suddenly as both men's attention moved to the little boy. "Why is Emma hurt!?" He exclaimed as he stomped his feet and shook his head.

"Adam…" Derek said as he tried to ignore the glare from Mark as he crouched down to his son's level, he looked him in the eyes. "Remember when daddy got that call this morning… from the hospital?"

"On your whistle?"

"Yep…" Derek nodded. "That was about Emma… she fell and got hurt, and Daddy had to be her doctor."

"You had to cut open her brains?" Adam asked.

"Not her brains…" Derek said trying to remain serious, but explain as well as he could without just confusing him further. "But she had a bump on her head… and she had to go to surgery to have it taken care of so her brains wouldn't get hurt…"

"I…" Adam said as he swallowed hard. "I… is… is she going to be okay?"

"We're all hoping she will be…" Derek nodded.

"I don't want her to be hurt, Daddy… I don't want her to be hurt… I want to go see Meredith, Daddy… I said mean things about her and I want to say I'm sorry…"

"Wait… he knows Meredith too?" Mark asked as he crossed his arms over his chest.

Adam continued to stare into Derek's eyes for several seconds as Derek looked up at Mark. Adam's eyes lifted to Mark's as well as he gave him a sad little smile. "Meredith is Daddy's soulmate…" He said as his eyes fell back to his father's, finding that Derek's eyes began to tear up. "Daddy…" he whispered.

"It's alright…" Derek said as he held his arms out for the little boy and let him wrap his arms around Derek's neck, as Derek stood up and looked Mark in the eyes, Adam rested his head onto his shoulders. "Meredith and I are old friends." He said softly.

"So you stole the chip out of my phone because you didn't want me to call her back?" He asked as he continued to glare angrily at Derek.

"Do you want the long answer or the short answer?"

"And then… then you kiss her in front of me… I mean… she's your goddamned patient's mother… that's totally unethical. If you have feelings for her, you shouldn't have operated on her kid, Derek."

"Well, I wasn't about to let anyone else operate on her." Derek argued. "Don't act like you had staked a claim, Mark. You had a half of a date with her, and you left her high and dry…"

"And when she called last night, I'm sure you set her straight, right? You probably just made her think I was a major asshole, and you were…"

"Don't swear!" Adam exclaimed as he turned his head and Derek touched his head to lay him back down on his shoulder.

"I didn't tell her who she was talking to last night, Mark. She thought she was talking to you… and she's probably embarrassed out of her mind. If you want to pursue a relationship with her…" Derek said as he shook his head. "By all means, do… I mean, she can make choices for herself…"

"That doesn't particularly work when her kid's neurosurgeon has his tongue down her throat." Mark growled.

"Mark, stop acting like I just stole your bicycle, and relax." Derek said with a frustrated sigh. "She's a grown woman, and she can make her own decisions… but I'm not backing down… because I am taking the same advice I'm giving you. I'm going for it… because I… I really care about her. I care about her, and I love her little girl…so stop acting like a spoiled baby, and be my friend… be her friend… her daughter was in an accident, we shouldn't even be having this conversation."

"I have to go." Mark said as he stomped around Derek toward the door. "And I'm not your goddamned babysitter!" He exclaimed as he walked out of the exam room and slammed the door behind him.

Adam lifted his head from Derek's shoulder and looked into Derek's eyes for a moment. He could see the hurt that Mark had caused, it was small and an almost insignificant change, but Adam could see it. "Daddy?" He whispered as he watched Derek tilt his head slightly.

"Hmm?" Derek asked as he watched Adam smile slightly.

"You kissed Meredith…" he said, as suddenly his smile brightened, and he let out the tiniest of giggles.

He watched as Derek's face turned quite serious, and his eyebrows raised as his bottom lip slipped into his mouth. "I did, didn't I…?" he said as he Derek made a slightly embarrassed face, though his eyes sparkled with humor.

"On the lips!" Adam exclaimed as Derek's cheeks officially began to turn red.

"Hush…" Derek said as he shook his head and shifted Adam, a smirk moving to his lips as he sighed. "You're going to have to be my assistant for the rest of the night… are you up for it?"

"Yes, Sir… Doctor Shepherd…" Adam said as he saluted his father.

"That's enough formalities… at ease…" he said as he tickled his son, and listened to his wild giggle as he turned and walked out of the exam room with him, as his head rested against his shoulders, adding to the weight that was already there.

* * *

Derek carried Adam down the hallway quickly toward Meredith's room. He made no time for anxiety, no time for second thoughts, and he swung his son to the floor as he crouched down beside him. "Listen…" He said as he tilted his head, his eyes meeting his son's as the slight smirk rose on the little boy's face. "You're going to have to be pretty quiet in there, okay?"

"Assistants aren't supposed to be quiet, they're helpers… they're supposed to help…" Adam replied as he sighed.

"Can you just do this one thing for me? No arguing? This is daddy's job… and you're not even supposed to be here, short stuff…" Derek said as he tilted his head and watched Adam sigh with a slight pout.

"Can I tell Meredith that I'm sorry?"

"You can talk to Meredith after I'm done with the doctor stuff, okay? What I need you to do is go into the room with me and sit quietly on the chair near the wall, alright? I'll let you know when it's okay to talk… but you have to remember… this is a quiet place… no shouting… no yelling. Inside voices…"

"Because Emma is sleeping…"

"Because Emma is sleeping…"

"Because you put stuff in her brain." Adam nodded.

"I didn't put stuff in her… cut that out." Derek said as Adam giggled.

"Are you going to kiss Meredith again?" Adam asked with a whisper.

"I think maybe we should take this one step at a time…" Derek said as he stood up and watched Adam look up at him.

"Sure… first step, you pucker your lips…" Adam said as he made a fish face as he sucked in his cheeks and moved his lips.

"Second step is you send your son to daycare for the rest of the day." Derek said as Adam stopped his puckering face and grinned at Derek.

"Inside voice." Adam said as he nodded toward the room as Derek shook his head and reached for the handle.

"You and your segues…" Derek said as he pushed the door open and walked inside, his Adam's hand in his as he became the center of attention once again. Meredith's eyes met his with a bit of a sparkle as Adam glanced to Derek first and ran toward her. "Adam." Derek said as he watched Adam stop in front of Meredith.

"Hi." He said as he lifted his hand and waved.

"Hi." Meredith said, her eyebrow raised as she glanced to Derek.

"I have to sit down now." He said as he waved toward Ellis. "Hi." And he turned to wave to Cristina. "Hi." He said again.

"Adam…" Derek said as he rolled his eyes and closed the door behind him.

"Bye." Adam said as he moved behind everyone and climbed into the chair that was empty as he swung his feet and waited for Derek's cue.

"Thank you." Derek said as he shook his head. He glanced to Ellis and watched as she smirked slightly as she glanced to Adam and back to Derek as she reached her hand out with the clipboard. "I'm sorry about that…" He said as he took a slow, deep breath and took the clipboard from Ellis' hand. "Just a little bit of a babysitting issue to…"

"I'm not a…" Adam started to interrupt as he closed his mouth and sat back in the chair, pouting as he stopped moving his legs.

"Alright…" Derek said as he stepped close to the bed and looked down at Emma. He watched her sleeping so peacefully, his eyes beginning to mist up just at the sight of her. "Alright…" Derek said again, clearing his throat. "Emma… Her surgery went very well…" Derek nodded. "There were no bleeds, and we were able to remove the fragments with no obvious damage… of course, as you know we won't know anything fully until she wakes up… and she's been given sedatives to help her sleep, so it may not be this evening…" He said as he realized that her tiny hand was in his. Somewhere along his explanation, he had grasped it, and with that tender gesture, he found that everyone was watching even more closely than before. He gently ran his warm hand over her skin as he smiled at the sleeping little girl. "So… right now is kind of a waiting game…" He said softly, his voice was so tender that it was almost a whisper. "But I think she'll be alright…" He whispered.

"Um…" Meredith whispered, clearing her throat slightly as his eyes lifted to meet hers. "There… were no complications?" She asked as Derek shook his head, his eyes directly on hers as he smiled slightly.

"No complications." Derek replied. Derek's eyes moved to Meredith's knee, having been covered with a blanket, he could see that she hadn't had an x-ray yet. "Have you had your knee looked at yet?" He asked as she shook her head and didn't reply, her eyes trained on his as Cristina finally spoke up.

"She hasn't... because she's an idiot." Cristina replied.

"Shut up, Cris… I was worried…Dr. Shepherd, this is my friend Cristina." Meredith replied as she glared at Cristina.

"Worried is an understatement. You didn't want pain killers, you wouldn't get an x-ray done… I think she needs a psych evaluation." Cristina said with a straight face as she looked at Derek. Derek chuckled slightly, his eyes passing to Meredith as she watched the humored expression on his face.

"What do you think about that, Doctor Shepherd?" Meredith asked Derek as he shook his head and smirked.

"I think you need your knee looked at." Derek nodded. "Doctor Grey, are you going to be here for a little while?"

"I can stay here with Emma…" Ellis nodded.

"Good." Derek said as he stood up straight and glanced to Adam. "We're going to take you down to x-ray, Mrs. McKennon, and…"

"Grey." Meredith interrupted as Derek gave her a curious glance. "Miss… Grey, Dr. Shepherd. I'm no longer married." She whispered.

"Miss Grey…" Derek nodded.

"You can call me Meredith…" She said with a slight giggle to her voice.

"And you…" Derek said as he crossed his arms over his chest. "Can keep calling me Doctor Shepherd…" he said as he tried to remain serious. "I like the power…" He said with a laugh as Meredith let out a laugh that sent a smile to his face. "Let's get you downstairs…" He said as he watched Adam tilt his head to gauge what his father was going to do. "I will have my assistant here help me… Adam… come here…" Derek said as he ushered the little boy over.

He hopped from his chair and ran toward Derek, where he stopped on the side of Meredith's chair as he looked up at Derek. "Take the handles behind the wheelchair, and kick the brakes up." He said as he nodded toward the back of the chair as Adam ran around and kicked at both of the brakes that had been placed on the wheels. "Alright…" Derek said as he walked around the back of the wheelchair. "We'll be back in a few minutes…" Derek nodded as he let Adam hold the handles as he began to push the chair.

Adam ran around and opened the door for them, as Derek pushed the chair from the room. Meredith took a glance back at Emma as they exited the room, and Derek leaned down and kissed the top of her head lightly. "She'll be alright…" He whispered, as she reached her hand back and grasped his, as Adam ran around in front of Derek, and helped him push the wheelchair toward the elevator.

------------------

Derek and Adam pushed Meredith's wheelchair down the hallway in virtual silence, the evening was finally settling in, and the hospital was appearing less busy. Derek wanted to speak, but he wasn't sure exactly where to begin, and he knew Meredith's thoughts were most likely everywhere else but focused on him. Adam kept looking up at Derek as they walked and he shook his head as the little boy opened his mouth to say something.

"Not yet." Derek whispered to the little boy as he sighed.

"Why not yet? Why not yet?" he asked as Derek shook his head.

"Shh… not yet…"

"Daddy… then when?"

"Later…" Derek replied in a whisper.

"What are you two boys whispering about back there?" Meredith asked as she tried to turn her head. "You know it's not polite to whisper."

"I was just saying that…"

"Adam." Derek said as Adam looked up at him and sighed.

"Ughhh…" He said, letting out an agitated sigh. "Dad-dee!" Adam exclaimed.

"Add-Dummm" Derek said as he gave his son a smirk as Adam glared at him as they stopped for the elevator. Derek released the handles and Adam took a step back.

"Alright…" Meredith said as she reached her hand around and grabbed the wheel, she turned herself around in the wheelchair, watching the boys as their jaws dropped slightly. "I'm not an invalid…" She said as Adam chewed on his lower lip, and Derek stood right beside him, with the exact same look on his face. His lower lip in his mouth, his right hand was rubbing the back of his neck. "What's the big secret?" She asked.

"Secret?" Adam asked as he looked up at Derek with a confused expression.

"Secret?" Derek mumbled. "I have no idea what you're talking about." He said as he started to walk around the chair. Meredith pulled the wheel and turned herself around, nearly hitting him with her leg. "Hey… be careful there, you're going to get hurt…" he said with a smirk on his face.

"Tell me what you two are whispering about…" Meredith said as she refused to put her back to them, rolling the chair in circles.

"Meredith, you're going to get dizzy…" Derek said as he laughed, continuing to walk around her as she continued to pull the wheel.

"Watch out, Meredith, you're going to puke!" Adam exclaimed as he giggled and stood in one spot as Derek continued to try to get behind her.

"Tell me what you're whispering about…" Meredith said with a laugh. "Or I'll puke all over your shoes…" She said as Derek stopped, laughing as she continued around in a full circle, he was able to grab the handle as the elevator door opened.

"Nope." Derek laughed as he nodded toward the elevator and chuckled as Adam ran into the elevator first, waiting for the two of them to follow.

* * *

They arrived at the radiology area and Derek looked to see if anyone was using the machines. He glanced to Meredith and gave her a soft smile as Adam peeked out from behind the wheelchair. "It looks like we're good to go…" Derek said as he gave her a smile. "Looks like you're getting the full tour a day before your internship starts, huh?" Derek said as he walked around behind the wheelchair.

"Wait…" Meredith said as she turned her head. Derek stopped the wheelchair and listened. "How did you know that I…"

"Mark." Derek replied as he began to push the wheelchair.

"Right…" Meredith said softly. "Mark… He talked about me?" Meredith asked, her thoughts were running through her head at top speed, her exhaustion was starting to get to her, and she was still very embarrassed about the phone call the previous night.

"He did…" Derek nodded as he nodded toward Adam, who ran over to the chair on the side of the room and sat down, giving a yawn as he smiled sleepily.

"What did he say?" Meredith asked as Derek started to look around in one of the shelves in the room.

"Oh… this and that…" Derek shrugged as he glanced to Meredith to see the exhausted look on her face. "He said he felt bad for leaving you at the park." Derek nodded. "He went back, you know…"

"He went back?" Meredith asked, her eyebrows raised as she smiled slightly.

"He was pretty disappointed that you weren't there." Derek said as he pulled a hospital gown from the shelf, he turned around and smiled.

"What is that?"

"Hospital gown." Derek said as he held it in his hand.

"I am not changing into a hospital gown." Meredith shook her head.

"You have to… hospital policy…" Derek shrugged.

"Derek…" Meredith muttered as she huffed.

"Daddy?" Adam said from his spot in the chair. Derek turned his head, raising his eyebrows. "Maybe she doesn't want to wear it because it's blue… do you have a pink one?"

"I think we might have a pink one…" Derek said as he turned around and started to shuffle through the shelf.

"Derek, I won't wear a pink one either…" Meredith mumbled as she shook her head.

Derek turned around and tossed a pink hospital gown on her lap. "The restroom is over there…" He said as he started to walk around the wheel chair, she glared at him and sighed.

"I've got it." She said as she pulled the wheelchair out of his grip and rolled toward the bathroom. Derek stood in the same spot as he watched her struggle with the wheelchair. She pulled it and tried to push it through the door, unlatching it and hitting it with her arms as she tried to pull herself inside. She glanced at Derek. "Thank you." She mumbled as she rolled backwards into the bathroom, as the door closed behind her.

Derek glanced to Adam as the little boy yawned again. "You're sleepy…" Derek said as the little boy nodded. Derek walked over to him and sat down beside him, letting the little boy rest his head on his arm as Derek put his arm around his son and kissed his head. "I'm pretty tired myself…" Derek said softly as he kissed his head again.

"Daddy?" Adam whispered as he looked up at his father's watchful gaze, his eyes meeting his with a sad, sorrowful glance.

"Hmm…?" Derek said as he watched Adam sigh.

"Is Emma really going to be okay, or are you just giving me a load?" He asked as Derek's eyes widened as he sat up.

"Giving you a load?" Derek asked with a smirk. "A load of what?"

"Dirty laundry…" Adam shrugged.

"Am I giving you a load of dirty laundry?" Derek asked as he shook his head and tried not to laugh at his son's sincere question. He tried to hide his smirk. "Am I giving you a load of dirty laundry…?" Derek asked as he moved his eyes to meet up with his son's sincere, curious gaze.

"Yeah… like… are you lying?"

"I'm not lying." Derek replied. "As far as we all know… she's going to be just fine." Derek said as he watched Adam sigh. "Are you worried?"

"Yeah…" He shrugged. "She's a pretty nice girl…"

"She's not high on the cootie chart?"

"No… she's on the chart…" Adam nodded with a giggle. "But I don't want her to be hurt." He shrugged as he yawned a big yawn and leaned his head on Derek's arm again. "Daddy?" He asked as he sighed again.

"Hmm?" He asked softly.

"Where's Meredith?" Adam asked as Derek looked down at his son's confused expression.

"She has been a while, hasn't she?" Derek asked as he watched Adam nod his head. "Stay here, okay?"

"Okay." Adam nodded as he watched Derek walk over to the bathroom.

Derek leaned his ear against the door for a moment, and hearing no movement, he knocked lightly. "Meredith?" He called softly as his eyes met with Adam's. He gave him a confused look and Adam shrugged. "Meredith, are you alright in there?" He asked again, knocking on the door lightly, he still heard nothing. He waited a few more seconds before he tried the handle, his hand pushing it down slightly as he opened the door a little farther. "Meredith?" He said as he waited to hear an answer. It wasn't a large bathroom, a handicapped access room that was used for changing and for the quick bathroom break, and when he saw the empty wheelchair, he became slightly more nervous, with his anxiety hitting the roof when he noticed her legs on the ground, her pants were around her ankles and she was lying on the floor in her panties, the hospital gown in her hands. "Oh no…" He muttered as he glanced out at Adam. "Stay there." He said sternly as Adam nodded his head as his brow furrowed. Derek stepped back into the bathroom quickly and knelt at Meredith's side. "Meredith… Meredith!" Derek said as he touched her shoulder gently. "Meredith, answer me." He said sternly as he suddenly realized.

Meredith hadn't fallen onto the floor. She had eased herself onto the floor… and she wasn't unconscious.

She was sleeping.

When Derek realized what he was only looking at an exhausted, broken, half naked woman sprawled across the floor, he almost laughed. He would have laughed if he didn't know that her daughter wasn't lying unconscious in a hospital room in the floor above them. He would have laughed if he hadn't lost her for the past year and a half to her own journey. He would have laughed if he knew that the moment she woke up she would be mortified and probably never speak to him again. He would have laughed, but he didn't. He knelt beside her and watched her sleep for a moment, her closed eyes so peaceful, her breathing so regular, her body so relaxed. "I've spent almost 78 hours with you, Meredith Grey…" He whispered. "Do you realize that you've spent the majority of that time sleeping?" He said with a light chuckle as he let his eyes roam over her body. Her body was leaning on her good knee, her other knee was swollen and purple in color. It looked so painful, it looked so angry, and yet she lay on that cold tile floor as peacefully as if she were cuddled in a warm blanket.

Derek contemplated what to do, knowing that if he moved her too much, she'd wake, but at the same time, he knew that he had to wake her. He dreaded doing it, for he knew her reaction, but he smirked at the thought that at least she couldn't run away from him. He stretched his legs and lay himself down against her, and smiled as she pushed her body back against his. She mumbled in her sleep and pushed her head back, tendrils of hair falling onto his face as he shook his head lightly and touched her cheek. "Meredith." He whispered as he tried to lift her quietly from her slumber. "Meredith?" He whispered.

Meredith mumbled softly and moved her face, breathing a tender sigh as she whimpered. "Meredith…?" He said softly.

"Ricky…" Meredith mumbled, and as soon as the words slipped from her lips, Derek began to sit up in alarm. He didn't want her to wake up with him beside her like that, not when she was whispering the name of her husband. He moved her slightly as he sat up, his voice slightly jarring her eyes open.

"Meredith." He said, his voice was nearly stern, but held so much love and tenderness. She stared at the wall in front of her, and Derek watched the color move up her cheeks as she realized where she was. "It's okay…" he whispered. "You just fell asleep in the bathroom." Derek said as she refused to look at him. "Are you alright?" He whispered. He watched her nod her head as she mumbled 'uh huh'. "Do you need help?" He whispered as she shook her head and swallowed hard. "I'll be right outside, okay? Call me if you need me…" He whispered.

"Okay." She said softly as she felt him move his warm body away from hers, standing up slowly. She could feel his eyes burning into her face as her cheeks continued to burn with embarrassment. She waited until she heard his feet on the floor, and the door opening slowly. She listened to the clack of the latch on the door, as she finally allowed the tears of embarrassment flow down her cheeks.

* * *

When Meredith was through in the bathroom, she was able to pull herself into the wheelchair, and she opened the door to the bathroom, pushing it behind her as she pulled the wheel on the wheelchair. Her clothes were in her lap, and she kept her eyes looking down at them as she pulled herself from the room. She could see Derek stand up out of the corner of her eye, and her face was pouty and sad as she stopped the wheelchair. He approached her and she lifted her eyes to his. He could tell she had been crying, and he wanted to comfort her, but as soon as her eyes hit his, they were deflected away from him, the embarrassment too much for her to deal with at the moment.

"Meredith?" Derek said as he started to walk toward her, he watched as she held her hand out to him.

"No." She said as she looked up into his eyes. "Just… just, no… Derek, No."

"No what?" He asked as he ignored her hand and knelt before her. "What are you saying 'no' to now?"

"No to… this." She said as she waved her hand between the two of them. "No… just…"

"This?" He said as he tilted his head. "What is 'this'?" He asked as he watched her eyes continue to be trained on his as he waved his hand between the two of them.

"Communication… and… comfortableness… and… You're my daughter's doctor." She said as she tilted her head.

"So? I'm many children's doctor." Derek shrugged.

"But not… there can't be any of… of this…" She said as she continued to wave her hand between them. "You're my daughter's doctor… and when I work here, you'll be my… my boss… oh God… I'm hurt… how am I going to be able to start my internship… oh God…" She groaned as she rested her forehead in her hand and began to cry a little.

"Meredith, you really need to get some sleep." Derek whispered as he reached for her hand, watching her slap his hand as he moved it out of the way swiftly.

"Hey… what was that for?"

"You're trying to do that thing… that thing where you're sweet and kind and wonderful… and I can't do that, Derek… because I'm not that way. I'm not sweet, I'm not kind… I'm selfish, and I'm exhausted… and I'm embarrassed… and… and… and Mark… he came back… and I didn't even get a chance to thank him yet, and I needed to apologize to him… for something. Where did he go? Did he leave because… because you…"

"Kissed you?" Derek whispered.

"Yes." She said as she gave him a confused look. "Because you did that… you… did that… why?"

"Because I like you." He said softly. "I like you, and I wanted you to know that. Do you like me?" He asked as he tilted his head.

"Derek, stop acting like we're six years old!" She squeaked as he reached for her hand again, only to be slapped harder. "Derek, stop it!" She shouted.

"Daddy!" Adam exclaimed as both of their attention went to the little boy as he stood on the floor by the chair. "She said no." He said as he stomped his foot. Derek stood up and glanced to his son.

"You're right…" He said as he sighed. "She did say no…" He said as he turned toward Meredith and took a slow, deep breath. "Meredith." He said as he released the breath slowly. "I'm sorry." He said as he turned and started to walk away. She watched as he walked past Adam and out into the hallway.

"Uh oh…" Adam mumbled as he glanced to Meredith.

"What? What, uh oh?"

"He's taking a time out, breather…" Adam said as he watched Derek standing just outside the door.

"A time out, breather?" Meredith asked.

"Uh huh…" Adam nodded. "When daddy gets mad and doesn't want to yell… he takes a time out, breather… He must be mad cuz I shouted at him."

Meredith watched the little boy's thumb lift to his mouth, his tiny fingernail finding its way between his teeth as he nibbled at it. Derek then turned around and walked back into the room. Without a word he walked across toward Meredith, he pointed at the chair next to Adam, and Adam silently jumped into it as Derek began to silently prepare the x-ray machine for Meredith without a second glance.

* * *

The exam was quiet and clinical, and from the look on Derek's face, Meredith could see that it was how he'd prefer that it go. He was tender and kind to her, but his features were now determined and less friendly, more doctor like than she had ever seen before. He instructed her for the x-ray and when it was time for the MRI, he escorted her to the machine, with Adam by his side, quiet and polite as he continually watched his father's eyes, even when he sat in a nearby chair and watched everything quietly.

When the tests were completed, and they waited for the results, Derek watched Adam yawn once again. He glanced to his watch and could see that it was well past 9 o'clock, Adam's bed time, and the little boy was slowing down considerably. Derek walked to the chair where Adam had been drifting off, and he crouched beside it as Meredith sat across the room watching them.

"Hey…" Derek said softly as he gently placed his hand on his son's cheek.

"Are you still mad with me and Meredith?" Adam whimpered as he rubbed his eye with the palm of his hand.

"I was never mad at you, or Meredith." He whispered as he ran his fingers through his son's hair.

"But you… you went out for a time out." Adam mumbled as Derek nodded.

"I know…" He replied. "I just have a lot on my mind." Derek whispered.

"You're worried about Emma too…?" He whispered as he raised his eyebrows at Derek.

"Emma is on my mind… yes…" Derek shook his head. "You're a nosy kid… do you know that?"

"I have to look out for you, Daddy. It's just you and me…" He said as he gave Derek a playful punch in the arm. "We're in it together…"

"We are…" Derek said as he gave his son a nudge on the shoulder as Adam began to yawn again. "We're going to bring Meredith down to Emma's room now." Derek said softly as he watched Adam nod slowly. "Do you need a lift?" he asked as Adam smiled as Derek held his arms out for him. He put his hands up and wrapped them around Derek's neck, as Derek positioned him where he was most comfortable. "That's right…" Derek said as the little boy rested his head on his father's shoulder, pushing his face into his neck softly as Derek groaned slightly as he lifted the little boy up. He turned around just in time to see Meredith avert her eyes and he shifted Adam slightly in his arms, as he walked over toward her and stood behind her. He took a slow, deep breath and sighed. "We're going to take you down to Emma's room… and someone from ortho will bring your knee brace and your test results." He said quietly as he watched Meredith nod, and without another word, he began to push her wheelchair to bring her down toward the elevators. "I'll have a nurse bring you a pair of scrubs to change into, and we'll have an extra bed in the room for you, so that you can stay with Emma." He whispered.

Derek watched her nod, and he pushed the wheelchair to the elevators. She remained silent the entire trip, her head bowed slightly as she continued to think, each and every second that he was behind her. She wanted to speak up, but she had absolutely no idea what to say, or how to continue from where they had left their conversation off. She wanted him to speak, but she knew that he wouldn't. He was respecting her wishes and he was keeping his distance, and the longer he did that, the more alone she felt.

Derek watched her very closely the entire trip, he could nearly feel her emotions snaking away from him, her willpower shrinking, her happiness was gone, her daughter in pain and broken. She was broken too. Not only that, but the job that she had worked so hard to obtain. The schooling that she had fought every step of the way to catch up with was yet again postponed. Her knee may not be broken, it may just be sprained, but it was going to be impossible for her to begin her internship in this condition. They stepped off the elevator, and Derek continued down the hallway toward Emma's room silently.

He wanted to touch her shoulder, he wanted to comfort her. He wanted to hold her, to talk to her, to find out what kept her away from him, and it all boiled down to one thing.

She wasn't his to begin with.

But why did he care? Why did she consume his thoughts? Why did the fact that she never called him, never asked him for help, never looked for him, why did it shake him to the core? She was, after all just one woman, and then it hit him. It hit him harder than that first meeting when her shoe slammed into the back of his skull on that miserable Christmas eve.

He stopped.

"Derek?" Meredith asked as she turned her head to look up at him. He was standing behind her, his eyes staring straight ahead. He had his other arm securely around Adam as he rested, perhaps even sleeping against his father's shoulder. "Derek, are you alright?"

"Why did you keep it, Meredith?" He asked as he looked down, his eyes catching with hers.

"What?" She whispered.

"The slinky… the gift… why did you keep it?" He asked as she bit her lower lip.

"Derek?"

"Meredith…it has been on my mind…. Since you showed it to me… it's been sitting in the back of my mind. I left the hospital with the thought that I may see you again… if you called me, if you needed me… and you never did… but you kept that gift, Meredith… and She…Emma… Emma grabbed it… she wanted it… and…"

"Derek." Meredith said as she shook her head.

"What?" He whispered.

"She wasn't grabbing the slinky." She whispered.

"What?" Derek whispered.

"She was trying to get a candy necklace that I had put on the television stand… that's why she was climbing on it." Meredith said. Her voice wasn't cold or hurtful, only knowing, as she watched the hope drain from Derek's eyes. "I'm sorry that I blamed you." She whispered. "I shouldn't have done that… and I'm sorry." She whispered.

"Oh." He said as he nodded his head, trying to hide the disappointment in his eyes, he gave her a sad smile. "Well… um… well, we're here." He said as he nodded toward the room as they stepped up to it.

"Yeah…" She said as she gave him a hopeful smile as she watched him reach for the door handle as he pushed his back against it. She turned her head back and stared out into the hallway as he backed her into the room again. He turned her around slowly, as if he were trying to ease her back into the reality of the situation, and found her mother sitting quietly at her daughter's bedside, her eyes still closed peacefully, Ellis' hand in hers as she whispered that her mommy had returned, and announcing to Meredith that Cristina had said she'd return in the morning.

Derek took a step back as he let Meredith take control of the wheelchair, moving it close to the bed as he shifted Adam in his arms and took another step back. "I… should get him to bed." He nodded, as Meredith glanced to him as she reached the bed. "I'll be in to check on Emma when I get in, in the morning." He said as he gave her a sad smile as she watched him turn toward the door.

"Derek." Meredith said as he turned his head to face her as she gave him a sad smile. "Thank you." She whispered. "For everything."

"Yeah…" he said as he nodded his head. "She'll be alright…" he whispered.

"Are you?" She asked as Derek's eyebrows raised and he gave her a fake smile and a nod.

"Yeah…" he said as he nodded and gritted his teeth in his smile. "Yeah, I'll be just fine…" He said as he pretended to brush the awkwardness off. "I um… I just got to get home… get him to bed… and maybe deal with a load of dirty laundry…" He said as he swallowed hard and took another step backwards. "Goodnight, Dr. Grey." Derek nodded toward Ellis. "Goodnight, Meredith… sweet dreams, Emma bear." He said as he slowly turned, and walked out of the room.

* * *

Ellis sat with her daughter as she sat at Emma's side, her eyes never left the tiny girl as she lie peacefully on the bed. They sat for nearly an hour as they waited for the doctor from Orthopedics to show up. Meredith let her finger roll over her daughter's skin time and again, as her thumb brushed against something that was pressed against her daughter's skin. Meredith turned Emma's hand over, and found attached to the center of her palm, a tiny sticker shaped like a heart. She glanced to Ellis and tilted her head as she swallowed hard.

"I watched him put that there." Ellis whispered.

"What?" Meredith asked as she looked up at her mother's eyes as she shifted in her chair slightly.

"Derek." Ellis whispered. "I watched him put that sticker on her hand." She whispered. "After the surgery. He pulled the sticker from her chart and put it on her hand."

"I don't…"

"It's just in case she wakes up." Ellis whispered as she glanced to her granddaughter. "If she wakes up and no one is around… or you're sleeping when she wakes up… She'll see it when her eyes open… and she'll smile." Ellis whispered. "I used to do that with my young patients… it distracts them from the scariness of the situation." Ellis said as Meredith turned her head and stared at the sticker in her daughter's palm. She ran her finger over it softly as she took a slow, whispering breath.

"I'm tired." She whispered as she glanced to Ellis.

"I know." Ellis replied. "Once you have the brace on… you can get some sleep." She whispered as Meredith nodded.

Meredith continued to stare at the sticker, her finger circling it as her mind raced in so many different places. She sighed and swallowed hard, trying so hard not to look at her mother as she watched Emma sleep. "How am I supposed to sleep when she's lying here… so helpless… so alone?"

"She's not alone." Ellis replied. "And she's certainly not helpless, Meredith. She's a strong little girl… she's so strong."

"I wish I were strong." Meredith whispered.

"Meri…" Ellis whispered as she shook her head. "Stop being so hard on yourself. You can't be there every second of her life…" She said as her head snapped in her mother's direction. "You know what I mean by that." She said as she shook her head. "I made some mistakes, Meredith… and we've talked about it… and I'm sorry. It's the truth though, Meri… you can feed them and give them nourishment… and you can chase them everywhere to make sure they don't touch something too hot, or walk too close to the road… but you have to let them learn and grow for themselves. She made a mistake, and she had an accident… and it's no one's fault."

"I could have lost her today." Meredith whispered. "I could have lost her, Mom… and then where would I be? I would be nothing… I would have nothing… and I would have died on the inside… and…"

"Meredith." Ellis said as she shook her head. "Don't take this the wrong way… please… but stop making yourself miserable. Yes… I wasn't a fantastic mother… we didn't have holidays and birthdays and happy beach moments… but no one says it has to be that way for you. Stop being so close minded… you let people in just so far, and then you hold your hands out with all of your strength to stop them. There is no malice intent, Meredith… there is no…"

"Mom… stop talking about Derek." She said as she put her hand to her head and rubbed her forehead. "Just… stop talking about him…"

"Why do you push him away, Meredith? He's just trying to be your friend."

"Because… Just… because, alright? I don't want to talk about him, I don't want to deal with him! I just want to sleep! I want to go to sleep! He's Emma's doctor… that's all he is…"

"Meredith." Ellis whispered.

"Mom." Meredith said as she glared at her mother as there was a light knock on the door as the ortho doctor stepped in.

"Ms. Grey?" She said with a smile as Meredith nodded as she held out her hand for Meredith. "I'm Dr. Storey." She said politely as she shook Meredith's hand.

Meredith's eyes moved to her mother and Ellis stood up slowly. "I'm going to go secure that bed for you, Meri… and ask about an on call room or something to rest in. Let you have some privacy for your exam…"

"Okay…" Meredith whispered as she watched Ellis walk toward the door. "Mom…" She said as she watched Ellis turn and raise her eyebrows in Meredith's direction. "If he didn't want to leave… he wouldn't have." Meredith whispered.

"I already said what I thought, Meri… if it is you that is having second thoughts about having him leave, it's up to you to deal with it. Stop making your life and your situations harder than they already are… give yourself some happiness, you've earned it." She said softly as she turned and walked from the room.

Ellis walked down the hallway and lifted the phone to her ear. She glanced into a darkened waiting room as she sighed, stepping into the room, she closed the door behind her. The room was dark except for the ambient light of the hallway, and she peeked out into the hallway as she waited for someone to answer. "Yes…" She said into the phone. "Chief Grey…" She said as she listened to the person on the other line. "I need my appointments held… I'm going to be in New York for a few more days… Yes…" She nodded as she sighed. "She's doing alright… holding herself together as best as she can… The surgery went very well… very well… we had the fortunate find of Doctor Shepherd here in New York. He is absolutely amazing… I feel like an idiot for letting him go…" Ellis said with a sigh as she heard a noise in the room. "Hold on a second." She said as she listened closely. She could hear the soft snoring of someone in the room. She put the phone back to her ear and whispered. "I'll call back in a little while." She said softly as she flipped her phone closed and listened to the snoring for a moment as she moved toward the door to find another room.

"I don't feel like an idiot for leaving." Derek's voice made her jump, her hand trembled on the handle as she turned.

"Doctor Shepherd?" She said as she pushed the button for the light, sending the room into a fluorescent glow as she backed up against the door.

"Yep…" Derek said as he squinted in the light, his eyes watching her for a moment as she tried to get used to the light.

"What are you doing sitting in here in the dark?"

"What kind of room is this, Doctor Grey?" Derek asked.

"Waiting room…" She mumbled as she looked back and forth at the empty chairs, her eyes finally resting on the man sitting on the small couch in the room, his son curled up beside him sleeping soundly with his father's jacket resting over him.

"And that is what I'm doing." He whispered.

"What are you waiting for?" Ellis asked as she continued to stand against the door, her head tilting.

"I'm waiting… for… Christmas… I'm waiting for it to rain. I'm waiting for it to snow, waiting… for morning, waiting for sleep to beckon, I'm waiting for my heart to stop breaking, and I'm waiting for Emma to wake up… whichever comes first… I want to make sure I don't miss it." He shrugged.

"I thought you left." Ellis replied.

"I told you… I'm not walking away." He replied. "I can't walk away. I can't walk out of this hospital without telling her how I feel. I can't let her walk out of here without her listening… so I'm sitting here… waiting… waiting for my turn, waiting for her to talk to me… waiting for her to see me… I'm just waiting." He whispered.

"What about Adam… do you think it's fair to him to have to sleep here while you wait?"

"He told me to wait." Derek replied. "Doctor Grey… Have you ever had something that you loved so absolutely dearly… something that just… made your heart flutter when it was near, and made your nightmares seem even more real when it was taken away? Have you ever felt that pain?"

"What do I look like to you, a psychiatrist?" Ellis asked as she stepped into the room and walked toward Derek.

"Unless you sit down next to me and listen to me wallow in self pity… I'm going to tell everyone that you miss me." Derek said as Ellis rolled her eyes, turned and sat down beside him.

"Go on." She said as she gave him a playful smirk. Derek shook his head and tipped it back, resting it against the wall. He sat for a long time saying nothing, as if he were trying very hard to find the exact words. Ellis was never one for patience, so she reached to him and placed her hand on top of his. "Derek." She said as he lifted his head. He looked directly into her eyes, and she could literally feel the pain that he was feeling. "Don't let her do this to you." Ellis whispered.

"Doctor Grey…"

"No." Ellis said as she leaned back and watched his eyes. "You missed your opportunity to wallow in self pity… you paused… no pausing… I'm going to tell you what I want to tell you." She said as she pointed at him and turned her head. "My daughter ran away with that man, Doctor Shepherd. Rick… or whatever his name was… she was head over heels in love with that man, and I couldn't figure out for the life of me why she wanted to waste her life with him. He had no drive, no ambition… but he made her happy…" She said as she turned her head to look into Derek's eyes. "His family was nothing but a walking, talking unemployment check, and my daughter was going to do great things with her life… so I thought…" Ellis said softly as she cleared her throat. "I wasn't the horrible ogre that she makes me sound like I was… I didn't force her out of my home… I didn't disown her…" She said softly. "What I did do… was tell her… that if she didn't get her act together… and finish school… and make something of her life, anything… if she turned into one of those people… that I didn't want to see her… because my daughter is not a pan handler… and my daughter is not a begger. My daughter is a strong, capable young woman with a mind of her own, and she didn't need another person telling her what to do with her life." Ellis said with a sigh.

"I told her that it was her life… and she needed to take it where she wanted it to go." She whispered. "What I didn't see… was that… Rick was not like his parents… he did care for my daughter… he loved her with all of his heart and he worked himself sick trying to provide for them. He had her going to school… he made her get a job… he was helping her, supporting her, loving her… and I didn't get to see that." Ellis said softly. "He took her from me, Derek. That's what I wanted to believe, but when it came down to it… I forced her away… and now… now my daughter is sitting in that room holding her baby's hand… the only link she has with the man that she had professed her soul to… holding her hand and praying… just… so hard that those eyes will open, and she'll look at her… and say 'mommy.'" Ellis whispered. "But do you know what is more painful for her right now, Derek? Do you know the real reason that her heart is broken?"

"Hmm…?" Derek mumbled as he listened intently.

"She is feeling so much guilt… and pain, deep in her heart… because despite the fact that Emma is her link to Rick… and she almost lost her today… she still can't stop thinking about you, that day that you met... and that kiss." She whispered with a smirk. "You really sealed her heart with that kiss, Derek... it was a good move..."

"Doctor Grey…" Derek rolled his eyes and sighed as Ellis grabbed his chin with her hand and turned his head to face him.

"Don't you dare, Doctor Grey me when I'm talking to you…" She said sternly. "If you think that I'm going to let you brush this aside because she thinks she knows what's best for her? If she knew what was best for her, Derek… she wouldn't have thrown your phone number in the trash that day. She needs you, Derek… now more than ever."

"And I'm waiting." Derek whispered.

"No." Ellis replied. "There's been enough waiting… no more waiting… you need to be pro-active… You're on deck, Derek… it's the bottom of the ninth and the bases are loaded with two outs, and the other team is up by two runs… you need to step up to the plate… you need to knock it out of the park, Derek... You need to knock the cover off the ball and you need to slide in head first." She said as she shook her head. "Stop stalling!"

"Did you just use a baseball metaphor on me?" Derek asked as she moved her hand from his chin.

"I did." She nodded. "I thought… you're a guy… that's the way guys think…"

"You don't hang out with many guys, do you?" Derek asked as she shook her head in disbelief. He chuckled a little as he sighed. Derek sat in silence as he let the older doctor's words seep into his mind. He sighed as he glanced to Ellis. "Can I ask you a question?"

"Go ahead." She shrugged.

"If you like me so much… or whatever… why would you and Mark's mother set Meredith up with Mark?" He asked as he watched her stare off straight ahead with a slight smirk on her face. He watched as her cheeks turned slightly red, and she didn't say a word, only smirked. "Oh my God!" Derek said with a laugh as he sat up. "Oh my God, you were trying to get Meredith laid!" Derek laughed. "Ha!" Derek exclaimed loudly as Ellis leaned forward and let her head rest in her hands for a moment.

She looked up at him and pointed her finger at him as he laughed. "Don't you dare tell her that!" She exclaimed as Derek continued to laugh. His face was red from laughter as he tried to catch his breath.

"Oh man… oh… haha…" Derek said as he tried to catch his breath, he looked down at Adam as he lay cuddled beside him.

"How did the date go, anyway?" Ellis asked as she watched Derek tilt his head and wipe a tear of laughter from his cheek.

"He was there for ten minutes, and was paged…" Derek shrugged. "You could have set her up with me…" He said with a smirk. "Don't tell me you didn't know I was in the city… I know you keep tabs on how things are going… you knew that she was going to be working at my hospital…" Derek shook his head.

"I figured it'd take a natural progression." Ellis nodded. "I didn't think that it would happen under these circumstances." She sighed.

"Who would have thought…" Derek said as he shook his head. "Ellis Grey… world famous surgeon… match maker… and pimp." He laughed as Ellis' face turned bright red as she shook her head and tried not to let him see her laugh, as he continued to laugh with her, as they leaned on one another in comfort.

Meredith sat in the room in her wheelchair, the orthopedic doctor had fitted her with a knee brace, finding that her kneecap wasn't broken, she was just suffering from a torn tendon and a bruised bone. He advised her to ice it properly, and be sure to wear the brace, and recommended that she stay off of it as best as she could for several weeks.

She huffed angrily as she waited for her mother, hoping that she would bring her a change of clothes. The hospital gown was drafty, and all she wanted to do was get a bed into the room so that she could sleep. She could feel her eyes drooping as she yawned and held Emma's hand in hers, leaning down to kiss her tiny fingertips as she whispered to the little girl.

Meredith's attention was then brought to the sound of the door opening. The doctor had pulled the curtain to block the door, so Meredith couldn't see the person entering the room, and she assumed it was her mother. "Mom?" Meredith said as she listened to the person behind the curtain as they stood beside the door, closing it carefully. "Mom, did you get the bed? I just… I just want to go to sleep… no more talking about Emma or Derek… I just want to get some sleep." She said softly as she yawned. She furrowed her brow at the fact that the person behind the curtain had not come out yet and she turned the wheelchair in that direction. "Mom? Are you alright?" She asked as she rolled the wheelchair closer to the curtain. "Mom?" She said as she was only two feet from the curtain, and reached for it, when she watched something slide out from beneath it, sending a slight puff in the curtain as she followed the object with her eyes. It slid to her wheelchair, stopping right beside her, she looked down at it in confusion and then back up at the door.

It was a shoe. A man's shoe.

She knew who it was, it could only be one person, and she hid her smirk as she glanced at the shoe and back up at the curtain.

"Look in the shoe…" She heard a soft whisper from behind the curtain, she couldn't help but let out a giggle. She furrowed her brow and looked down, bending at the waist, she lifted the shoe into her hand. Inside, there was a tiny piece of paper. Very slowly, she opened the paper, her eyes on the curtain as she let her eyes drop to the note.

**_M,_**

**_Please let me in._**

**_D._**

**_P.S. I have another shoe, and I know how to use it._**


	4. Ups And Downs Of Decisions

Meredith continued to stare at the note for several seconds, she could feel the tears welling in her eyes. "I thought you left." She said, her voice was dripping with exhaustion, her last strand of sanity was wearing thin, and he had just grasped hold of it.

"No." Derek replied. His own voice was becoming hoarse. The little sleep he had gotten the night before, added to the stress and frustration of the entire day was pushing him closer to the edge.

"Why didn't you leave?" She whispered, feeling the tears drip down her cheek.

"I am waiting." He whispered.

"Waiting?"

"Yes." He said as he continued to talk through the curtain.

"Waiting for what?"

"For you to return my shoe… my foot is getting cold." He said as he heard her laugh through her tears.

"It's my shoe now." She replied as she grabbed the wheel on the wheel chair and turned it around, rolling the chair toward the bed, she heard the curtain be pulled aside. "Finder's keepers." She said as she rolled up to the bed.

"Where would you learn something like that?" Derek asked as he took a step into the room, watching her grasp her daughter's hand.

"A little monkey named Joe said it to me once." She replied, shrugging her shoulder. "He was a cute little monkey…" She sighed.

"You talk to monkeys too?" Derek said as he took another step into the room.

"I only talk to monkeys." She said, tossing him a glance as she watched him stand a safe distance away from her.

"Well you're in luck." Derek said as he crossed his arms over his chest as he smirked.

"You're a monkey?" Meredith asked, raising her eyebrows at him, she watched as he took another step forward. "I think that would be quite the coincidence if that were true." She said as she as she turned her head. "Prove to me that you're a monkey…" She said as she felt him kneel beside the wheelchair.

"You want me to prove it?" He asked.

"That's what I said… are you a deaf monkey?" She asked as she giggled a little, running her fingers over her daughter's hand.

"I am not a deaf monkey…" he nodded definitively. "But you're going to have to trust me on the monkey thing…" He shrugged. "It's true…" He said as he tilted his head to see if she would look at him. He watched her face, watched the slight smirk on her face disappear as she sat sleepily staring at her baby girl. He watched the fear return to her face as her free hand gripped the arm rest on the wheelchair.

He was about to take her hand, when there was a knock at the door. "Excuse me…" He said as he began to stand up, watching her eyes as they clashed with his for just a moment. She could see a sparkle in his eyes as he gave her a tender smile. She followed him with her eyes, as he stood up and walked toward the door, her eyes widening when she saw that the person at the door was holding a pizza, two containers of bottled water, and a small paper bag. He paid the person at the door, and turned around with the pizza and the bag in his hand. "If there's anything that I do know about you…" He said as he approached her. "Is that when you're stressed out… you don't eat, and you don't sleep…"

He watched as her jaw sit slacked open slightly as she watched him approach, and he nearly made a joke about her being on the verge of drooling. "I'd sleep if I had a bed…" Meredith mumbled as he grabbed the tray on wheels from a few feet away from her. He hit the on the tray with his hand and lowered it to her level as he placed the box on top of it and opened it, sending the scent of pizza through the room.

"And if I know anything else about you…" He said as he tossed her a paper plate. "I know that you hate hospital food." He said as he watched her tilt her head. "And this is not hospital food, by any stretch of the imagination." Derek replied. He looked down at his feet. "Any chance of getting that shoe back?" He asked. He watched her shove the shoe between her hip and the chair as she shook her head and reached for the pizza.

"No way, Monkey Man." She said as she grabbed greedily at the pizza and pulled a slice onto the plate, watching him laugh slightly. She shoved the pizza slice into her mouth and munched on it hungrily. "Hey…" She said as she watched him pull a chair closer to her. "Where is Adam?" She asked as a bit of cheese fell on her chin as she spoke with her mouth full.

"First of all… don't talk with your mouth full… You're making a mess…" He said with a laugh as he reached across and pulled the cheese from her chin as she giggled and reached her hand up with a napkin as she licked at her chin. He laughed and shook his head as he pulled his hand back slowly. "He is… currently being watched by a very kind soul down in one of the waiting rooms…" He said as he nodded his head. "And before you ask, yes… he has eaten…" He nodded his head. "I'm a very good Daddy." He said with a nod.

"I'd never question it." She said with a smirk as she watched him pull a container from the paper bag. "What is that?" She asked as she watched him pull the plastic wrap from the container.

"Salad." He said as he opened it and pulled a fork from the bag. He flipped the fork in the air and shoved it into the salad, looking up to find Meredith staring at him with a bit of pizza hanging from her mouth. "Are you alright?" He asked as he gave her a humored look as she stared at his hand. "Do you want some salad?" He asked as he watched her start to chew again slowly.

"Um…" She mumbled as she took another bite. "No… no… it's okay…" She said as she averted her eyes and continued to eat. "Pizza is good..." She said with a full mouth as she continued to eat, reaching for the bottled water at the same time as Derek, she nearly grabbed his hand, pulling it back as if she had touched something hot, her eyes met his as her cheeks blushed slightly.

He pulled one of the bottles off the tray and opened it, handing it to her as she gave him a shy smile. He smiled back at her tenderly as she continued to eat. He watched her eyes as she ate, and thus began a great staring contest that neither one was willing to lose, as they both ate in silence. After several moments, another knock came to the door and Derek smiled softly as he stood up. "Excuse me..." He said as he stood up, turning his head to catch her eyes again as he walked toward the door. He smiled at her as she blushed again and he chuckled slightly, reaching for the door handle.

He opened the door and stepped out of the room for a moment, and Meredith continued to eat hungrily as she waited. The door opened again, and Derek stepped back in, pulling with him a hospital bed. "Your chariot awaits..." He said as he entered the room, watching as Meredith smiled shyly as he pulled the bed across the room and carefully placed it beside Emma's. She watched him lock the wheels and pull down the rails on the bed as he prepared it. He walked to the small closet in the room and opened it, pulling clean linens from the closet, he walked to the bed as he started to make the bed. He glanced over to Meredith finding her watching him, her piece of pizza in her mouth mid-bite as she watched him.

"You know..." He said as he watched her pull the slice from her mouth and set it on the plate. "I've noticed that you're drooling more over this bed than you were over that dinner..." He said as she blushed yet again, and averted her gaze. "Oh... don't give me that bashful routine..." He said with a laugh as he continued to make the bed. He watched her take another bite and walked over to the closet, pulling a pillow from within it. "You must be exhausted... between the hangover you have got to have from last night... and the accident... and..."

"Wait..." She said with her mouth full of pizza. "Wait, wait... how do you know that I should... that... that I have a hangover? That I could have a hangover?" She asked as she watched him suspiciously.

"I...um... Mark told me... that you called last night..." Derek nodded his head as he smiled softly at her. "He said that you were angry at him... and that you called him." Derek shrugged.

"Oh." She said as she continued to eat in silence.

Derek finished making the bed and walked back over to his chair, he sat down and started to eat his salad as he watched Meredith drift off mid-slice. "Hey... you don't have to eat it all..."

"I know..." She mumbled. "Just... hungry..."

"Yeah... and exhausted..." He said as he reached over and grabbed to top of the box, closing the pizza, she raised her eyebrows.

"Derek..." She whimpered as he set the rest of his salad on top of the box and rolled the tray away.

"You're not even eating that anymore..." Derek said as he tilted his head. "You've been chewing on the same bite for five minutes."

She swallowed and gave him a pathetic sigh. "Don't wanna choke..." She mumbled as she dropped the slice onto the plate and looked up at him. "Thank you for dinner." She said as he gave her a smile and took her a plate.

"You're very welcome..." He said as he reached over and placed the plate on the box, walking around the wheelchair, she looked up and giggled. She had a silly smile on her face as she looked at him. "What are you doing?" He asked as she giggled again.

"Doctor gave me some pain pills…" She giggled.

"Oh, she did, did she?" Derek asked as she continued to grin.

"Uh huh…" She said as her head lolled back down.

"Are you sure she didn't just give you silly pills?" Derek asked as she laughed out loud and tipped her head back again as she looked at him.

"Maybe… she didn't let me see the bottle…" Meredith giggled as Derek pushed the brakes on the chair and walked around the front. "Alright, Doctor hot… how are we going to do this?" She asked as she raised her eyebrows and slapped her hand over her mouth as she started to laugh.

"Doctor hot?" Derek asked with a laugh as she shook her head, then nodded, shaking her head again.

"Yep… those were definitely silly pills…" Derek said as he leaned down to pick her up, she grabbed hold of his scrub shirt. "What are you doing?" He whispered as she let out a tiny giggle.

"I wanted to kiss you again." She whispered.

"I don't think that's a good idea…not just yet…" He whispered, his voice was low and humored and her eyes sparkled with sleepiness.

"Why not? Are you a bad kisser?"

"No…" He said with a chuckle. "But you're under the influence of drugs…" He said as he lifted her from the chair with a soft grunt. "And I… am under the influence of… something else…"

"Alcohol?" Meredith asked as his shoe fell from beneath her onto the floor. "Don't touch that shoe… it's mine…" She exclaimed as she giggled.

"No…" He chuckled. "Not alcohol…" he whispered as he very gently placed her in the bed.

"Hmm…" She mumbled as she glanced over to Emma's bed. "Check her for me before you go…" She whispered as Derek nodded his head and very gently covered her with the blanket.

He walked over to Emma and checked her vitals, checking her bandage, he glanced to Meredith and he lifted her tiny hand to his lips as he gave her a gentle kiss.

"I love you, Emma…" Meredith mumbled as her lip trembled.

"She loves you too, Meri." Derek whispered, her nickname tumbling from his lips as she raised her eyebrow and giggled a little.

"Derek?" Meredith said as she struggled to keep her eyes open.

"Hmm?" Derek whispered as he raised his eyebrows.

"Please hold me." She whispered.

"Meredith…" He said softly as he started to walk toward her, she grabbed his hand, pulling on it.

"Derek… please? If you don't hold me, I'll run away…"

"I've heard this ploy before…" Derek replied.

"And you held me." Meredith mumbled.

"But you still ran away." Derek whispered.

"I'm not runnin' anywheres for a while." Meredith mumbled as she tugged his arm.

"Do you promise?" Derek whispered.

"Trust me." She said softly as Derek squeezed her hand. He walked around the bed, and slipped his other shoe off his foot, and very tenderly slipped into the bed, tucking the blanket under her as he let his arm rest beneath her head, and his other arm held her hand as she lay on her back. "Derek…" She mumbled as she rested. "Sing me a lullaby…" She whispered.

"Oh… I don't sing…" He whispered.

"Hum…" She whispered.

"Okay…" He whispered as he began to hum a soft tune as he held Meredith closely to him, dipping his nose into her hair, breathing her scent, he was transported to another time, another place, and a warm feeling began to fill his belly. He hummed it so tenderly, he could feel her body relaxing into his, melting into his grasp, just when he thought she was asleep, she turned her head and looked into his eyes groggily.

"That song sounds familiar…" She mumbled as she watched his eyes sparkle with a slow smile.

"That's because I hummed it last night over the phone…" He whispered. "To get you to sleep…" He said as he watched her lean her head forward, where his lips gently touched her forehead, her eyes fluttering closed.

"It's nice…" She whispered, her mind and body finally slipping into a tender relaxation as Derek continued to kiss her head gently, closing his eyes as they both drifted off.

* * *

The morning sounds of nurses bustling was enough to lift Derek at least consciously from his exhausted slumber. He had to think for a moment about where he was, but he didn't have to think twice about whose hand was grasping his, and whose nose was pressed delicately into the crook of his neck, or whose hair was making his nose tickle. She didn't move or stir in his arms, and his attention moved across the room to the other bed, where the tiny girl slept peacefully as the nurses checked her vitals and wrote in the chart, smiling over at him as he smiled back, holding Meredith securely in his arms as he felt the gentle tingle in his fingertips as his arm remained asleep beneath her.

He knew that it was still fairly early, nearly five in the morning, for the sun had not risen just yet, and the nurses were always there very early for their rounds, he watched as they quietly left the room, leaving them with the silence that they had been reveling in throughout the night, even if the room still had the delicate hum of the heart monitor, the soft buzz of the fluorescent lights, and the ticking of the clock in the room, sending echoes against the sterile walls. He felt Meredith move against him slightly, taking a slow deep breath against his skin, and he felt his body reacting to her closeness. She was still sleeping, but he could tell that she was reveling in his closeness, clinging to him tightly as he began to run his thumb across her hand.

His eyes traveled across the room to the little girl as she lay peacefully. His eyes remained focused across the room on the bed of the little girl for a very long time, watching her chest rise and fall, listening to the sound of the heart monitor, thinking only tender thought for the little girl, when his eyes moved to her mother, finding a pair of gray-green eyes staring back at him.

He watched for a moment as a series of emotions flashed across her soft stare, starting with a look of surprise, her brow furrowing, showing the concern that something may have happened between the two of them in her vulnerable state, furrowing a bit more in confusion as she tried to actually remember her vulnerable state. Her eyes then clouded over with worry as she thought of Emma, tempted to turn her head from him to check on her, she knew that she was fine, because Derek had been watching her, and his eyes were filled with nothing but hope. He watched her eyes then flash clear again, as the corners of them wrinkled just slightly as her bottom lip slipped into her mouth.

"I was bad last night, wasn't I?" She whispered, her voice was low and tender as she gave him a concerned look.

"You were exhausted." He replied, his voice just as tender as hers as he gave her a soft smile. "No judgement."

"I said stupid things, didn't I?" She whispered.

"You stole my shoe." He replied.

"That wasn't the drugs." She said as she gave him a bashful smile and giggled just a little, as she watched his eyes flash over her to Emma's bed, and his eyebrows raised. "What?" She whispered as Derek's eyes moved to her. He gave her a nod, and his eyes moved to Emma again. Meredith turned her head, feeling Derek's hand squeeze hers tenderly, she squeezed it back as she watched the little girl's bed.

The movement from the bed was what caught Derek's eyes, her eyelids were fluttering slightly. The two of them nearly held their breaths, Meredith's hand grasping Derek's so tightly that he could feel that the circulation was nearly being cut off, as the little girl's eye lids flickered and finally fluttered open. Derek could feel Meredith gasp slightly, as if she wanted, needed to say something, but they found themselves speechless as the little girl stared straight ahead. Meredith's head turned to look into Derek's eyes, finding that they had never left her daughter, his attention was on Emma, and only Emma.

Emma lay with her eyes opened and her hands at her side, staring straight at the ceiling. Meredith watched her daughter blinking, and her chest was rising and falling a little quicker as it became apparent that she was becoming nervous with her situation. Derek held Meredith's hand tightly, moving his lips to her ear. "Just watch." He whispered as the little girl's lips moved a little, and her tongue darted out, wetting her lips. The little girl moved her hands a little as they watched her cringe just a little. They watched as the little girl lifted her hand to rub her nose, letting her hand touch her nose as she scratched it a little, her hand raising to her eyes as she spotted the tiny sticker against her skin. Meredith squeezed his hand suddenly as they both watched the little girl stare at her hand for a moment.

When suddenly, a smile erupted over the girl's face, her eyes lighting up as she attempted to turn her head. "Mama…?" Her voice whispered through the room, sending every inch of Meredith's skin into a goosebump.

"Baby…" Meredith whispered as she rolled to her side, her eyes catching with her daughter's, as a smile appeared on her face.

"Mama!" Emma exclaimed.

"Derek…" Meredith whispered as she realized that he was already on his way to her, his hand reaching out for the little girl's hand.

"Hey there sweet thing…" Derek said as he watched the little girl begin to panic. "Don't worry… mama is right there…"

"Mama…" She said as she held her hand out to Meredith, who held her hand out for Emma as Derek began to check her over.

"Baby!" Meredith said as she started to cry. "Mama loves you so much… Mama loves you so much…" Meredith exclaimed.

"Derek…" Emma said as she gave Derek a look of fear. "I need mama…"

"Alright…" Derek said as he walked around the bed toward Meredith. He kicked the brakes on the wheels.

"What are you doing?" Meredith asked as she was suddenly pushed closer to Emma, their hands meeting as the beds were pushed together, as mother and daughter clasped hands at last. Meredith's eyes moved to Derek as he gave her a smarmy grin. "Derek… you…"

Derek smiled as suddenly his pager sounded. He glanced at the message on it and his eyes widened. "Oh, crap… crap…" he shook his head.

"What? What is it? Is it Adam?" Meredith asked, fearing the worst.

"No." He said as he swallowed. "I forgot… today is the first day with the new interns… orientation… crap." Derek said as he looked at Emma and then to Meredith.

"Well go, then…" Meredith said as she moved her arm.

"I can't leave you guys… she woke up, and she needs an exam… and…"

"Stop poking at her… go to the orientation… where is Adam?"

"He's… with your mother…" Derek said as he put his hand on his forehead.

"You left your son with my mother?"

"He was sleeping… she… was convincing that she was a good babysitter… I mean… like I said, he was sleeping, she couldn't have corrupted him much… I'll… I'll put him in daycare… I'll be back in a half hour!" Derek said as he took a step backwards, kicking his shoes he slipped them on one at a time. "I'm doing the exam… I will be back in a half hour…"

"Derek…" Meredith said as she shook her head. "I'm not going anywhere."

"Good." He said as he leaned over Emma and kissed her forehead tenderly. "Welcome back, sweet pea." He said softly as he glanced at Meredith. "There is so much I need to know, Meredith… I don't feel like there's enough time…"

"There won't be, if you don't get going… I'll be here when you get back… I promise." She said as she watched him swallow hard.

"I'm so afraid that if I walk out of this door, you won't be here when I get back."

"Do you want my wallet?" She asked as she gave him a smirk, watching him slide his lab coat over his shoulders.

"No." He said as he chuckled. "Your shoe." He said as he turned and reached to the ground. He grabbed her tennis shoe from the ground and slipped it into his lab coat pocket. "For luck." He said with a laugh, as he listened to her laugh as he ran from the room to answer his page.

* * *

Ellis sit quietly in the waiting room, yawning slightly as the buzz of the hospital began to pull her out of the nap that she had fallen into, her eyes moving to the little boy who was still sleeping beside her. He hadn't moved an inch beneath his father's jacket, and Ellis was both surprised and happy that he had remained sleeping. Derek had said that he'd be fine if he woke up, but Ellis never knew exactly what to do with children, especially a person's child of which she knew very little about. She yawned a little as she looked up, seeing the shadow of someone walking by the window quickly, she watched the door swing open quickly.

"For the love of God, Derek… he's sleeping…" Ellis said as Derek stand there panting slightly as he gave her a confused look.

"I am so sorry…" He said as Ellis shook her head.

"I told you to go."

"I know… but I was only going to go for a little while… I didn't mean to…"

"I told you to stay there." Ellis replied.

"You shouldn't have had to watch him… I'm sorry." Derek said as he caught his breath.

"Doctor Shepherd… he hasn't moved… I was comfortable, he was sleeping… and you look like you stuck your finger in an electrical outlet." She said, referring to his hair. He put his hand on his head and felt the strands of hair standing on end, quickly he smoothed them back as he leaned down to Adam. "Wait…" Ellis said as she grabbed his arm before he roused the little boy. "What are you doing?"

"I'm bringing him downstairs… to the daycare in the…"

"You will do no such thing." Ellis shook her head. "Daycare is for babies… he isn't a baby… or so I've heard."

"I have to work… I have to go to work… and I need to…"

"I can take care of him perfectly fine, Derek…"

"Doctor Grey, I'm not going to make you take care of my son… Emma is awake, and I know you want to…"

Ellis' eyes lit up. "She's awake?" She asked as a small smile appeared on her lips as Derek nodded.

"You don't have to watch Adam." Derek said softly as he watched Ellis shake her head.

"That's nonsense." Ellis replied. "There's no reason that the poor boy needs to be dragged down to the daycare when I'm perfectly capable of watching over him and making sure he's well taken care of." She said as she watched Derek stare down at his sleeping son, and glance back to Ellis. "You trusted me to watch him while he was asleep… you can trust me when he's awake." She said softly as Derek sighed. Ellis was not backing down, and Derek glanced to his pager as it sounded again. "They sound persistent, Doctor Shepherd."

"It's fine." Derek replied as he crouched down to Adam. "Hey…" Derek whispered as he touched his son's nose softly with his fingertip. "Hey… buddy?" He said softly as the little boy's eyes flickered open slightly as he caught his father's concerned look.

"Daddy…" He mumbled as he turned his head, lifting it from the chair, he realized that there was someone else sitting next to him, though Derek was right in front of him.

"Hey, sleepy head… it's still pretty early…"

"I'm tired…" He grumbled as he lay his head back down.

"I know… I know… Can I ask you a favor?"

"Hmm?" Adam mumbled.

"Can you sit up for me for a minute?" Derek asked as he started to pull his jacket from Adam, as the little boy grasped at it.

"Daddy…" He grumbled.

"I know, I know… it's not nice… sit up, please?" He said as the little boy sighed and sat up slowly, letting out a big yawn, his eyes glanced to Ellis as he stared into his father's eyes.

"This here…" He said, nodding to Ellis. "This is Emma's grandma…" Derek said as he nodded toward Ellis.

"Uh huh…" Adam mumbled.

"She wanted to know if you'd rather hang out with her… or go to daycare…"

"Where's Meredith?" Adam asked softly as he glanced to Ellis.

"She's in Emma's room…"

"Is…?"

"Emma is awake… but pretty sleepy…" Derek replied before Adam could even ask. He smiled at his father, and Derek watched as his eyes sparkled. "So what's the verdict, shmerdict?"

Adam glanced to Ellis and tilted his head. "You're Emma's Gramma?" Adam asked.

"That I am…" She nodded as she smiled at Adam. "I'm also Meredith's Mommy…" She said, watching Adam's jaw drop and his eyes widen.

"I'm Adam Shepherd." He said, holding his hand out to Ellis as he glanced to Derek.

"You can call me… Ellis…" She said as Adam nodded, and glanced to Derek as Ellis shook his hand.

"You can call her Doctor Grey…" Derek replied.

"I'm going to call you grandma." Adam said definitively as he started to slide from the chair.

"Where are you going?" Derek asked as Adam shoved Derek's coat at him and reached for Ellis' hand.

"I'm going to go see Emma." Adam replied. "I need to talk to Meredith." He said as he tugged on Ellis' hand and touched Derek's shoulder. "We'll be alright, Daddy… go on… it's a beautiful day to save lives…go have some fun." Adam said as he tugged Ellis until she stood up, looking down at Derek.

Derek stood crouched with a confused look on his face as he looked up at Ellis. "What is that look for? He's your son." She said as she watched Derek slowly stand up.

"So I take it you're going with Doctor Grey, huh?" Derek asked as Adam nodded his head.

"Grandma…" Adam insisted as he tugged her arm again, leading her out of the room before Derek could say another word.

* * *

Meredith lie on her back her hand extended into her daughter's as she sat up carefully, slowly letting her hand slip from Emma's. The nurse came in and checked on Emma briefly, and helped Meredith into a pair of scrub bottoms and a scrub top that she had borrowed from one of the doctors. Meredith watched Emma from her bed for a moment, and she could hear the little girl whimpering slightly in fear.

"Mama…?" Emma said as she tried to turn her head slowly so that she could see her mother, her voice was becoming slightly panicky.

"Mama isn't going anywhere…" She said softly as she swung her leg off the bed, her braced leg was tender and harder to move, but she was able to push the beds apart enough to slide them down and use the bed for support as she stood up. "Mama is right here…"

"Mama…? What happened?" She asked groggily as she looked up at Meredith.

"You fell down, sweetheart… can you see me okay?"

"What happened?" Emma asked again.

"Sweetheart… you fell down… do you remember climbing on the television stand, baby? Do you remember looking for your candy necklace?" She asked in a soft voice, watching Emma's face scrunch up in confusion as her eyes seemed to cloud up with more confusion.

"Mama?" Emma whimpered as she stared at Meredith. "What happened?" Emma said as a tear began to fall down her cheek.

Meredith could feel her heart pounding in her chest as the little girl began to sniffle. "Don't worry, baby… don't cry…"

"Mama?" Emma whimpered.

"Shhh…" Meredith whispered as she propped herself up against the bed as she began to look over the little girl carefully, looking into her eyes, asking her to move her fingers and toes, when after a moment the door opened, and Meredith's attention darted to the person walking in.

Ellis stepped into the room, her hand in Adam's as they walked in. "Meredith?" Ellis asked, seeing the look of complete panic on her daughter's face as the little girl in the bed sobbed. "Oh… oh, Emma…" Ellis said as she rushed to the bed, releasing Adam's hand as she stepped to the bed quickly, opposite of Meredith. "Oh… you're awake… you're awake.

"G-ma…" Emma whimpered. "G-ma… what happened?" She whimpered as she sniffled.

"Mom, she keeps asking me what happened… she hasn't said anything else… she just keeps asking what happened… what happened? Did something go wrong with the surgery? Was there more damage, is she bleeding?" Meredith panicked as Ellis kissed the little girl's forehead.

"Meri…" Ellis said as she looked up at Meredith. "You have to calm down…" She said, shaking her head.

"But she's…"

"She's fine…" Ellis said as she reached across and grabbed her daughter's hand. "Look at me, Meredith…" Ellis said as the young woman continued to stare at the little girl. "Meredith Grey, look at me now!" Ellis said as Meredith started, her eyes darting to her mother's. "She is fine…"

"What happened, G-ma?" Emma whimpered.

"You were in a little accident, princess…" Ellis whispered. "G-ma has missed you…"

"What happened?" Emma whimpered.

"You don't worry… don't you worry one bit about what happened…" Ellis said softly as the little girl looked so worried, and her mother's fear only petrified her more. "You just close those pretty little eyes and rest for your G-ma… you rest for G-ma and you'll be as good as new…" She whispered as Meredith watched the little girl close her eyes slowly.

"I love you, Mama…" She whimpered as she drifted to sleep, a tender smile replacing the fearful frown that had been there previously.

"What… is… what is she...feeling…and…?"

"She's disoriented, Meredith…" Ellis replied. "It was a very big accident… and she got a bump on her head… it's going to take some time… she may need speech therapy… we don't know how severe it is… but you cannot panic… you can't." Ellis whispered. "You have to be strong for her… and you have to show her that there's nothing to be afraid of."

"But there is plenty to be afraid of…" Meredith replied as she shook her head at her mother.

"Don't be afraid, Meredith!" Adam's voice interrupted the conversation as Meredith's head turned in Adam's direction, having not even noticed that he had come in with Ellis.

"Adam?" Meredith whispered, glancing to Ellis.

"Did I forget to mention that we have a visitor?" Ellis asked with a slight tilt to her head as Meredith gave her mother a confused look. "I told Derek that I could keep an eye on Adam… it's no problem for me, I insisted."

"Meredith?" Adam mumbled from across the room as he glanced to the chair in the corner. "I'm sorry." He said as he folded his arms behind his back and tilted his head, his messy hair stuck in all directions as his crystal blue eyes blinked a sincere glance to Meredith. "I'm sorry I said mean things…"

"Mean things?" Meredith whispered as she shifted slightly between the beds, pushing her bed backwards as she faced Adam after a moment, using her bed for support with her braced leg. "What mean things, baby?" Meredith whispered as she held her hand out.

Adam paused for a moment as he pulled his right arm from behind his back and rubbed the back of his neck. "Um… the other day… at the park, I said mean things to Emma… because I was mad at you… I'm not mad at you anymore… and I'm sorry Emma got hurt." He said as he swallowed hard.

"Oh… you don't have to apologize for a silly accident…" Meredith said as she watched him take a step forward slightly, shifting from one leg to the other. "Is that what you and your daddy were talking about yesterday?" Meredith said softly.

"Yes." Adam nodded. "I told him that I wanted to say sorry… he said I should wait… but I couldn't hold it in my brains anymore… my tummy hurted when I didn't tell you I was sorry. I'm sorry, Meredith. Will you be my friend again?"

"Again?" Meredith said as she beckoned him slightly with her hand. "We were always friends… I'm sorry if I made you mad at me, Adam." Meredith said as she shook her head. "I like you very much… and it made my tummy hurt to know that I hurt you."

"Oh…!" Adam exclaimed as he ran toward Meredith, moving past her hand, he wrapped his arms around her on the side of her good leg, being careful not to hit her knee brace as Meredith rubbed his back tenderly as he looked up at her. She ran her fingers through his hair and watched as he looked up at her eyes with a big smile. "You still smell like a mommy…" He said with a giggle as he stood up straight and took a step back. "But I told daddy… I told daddy that you were just my friend… and we agreed that you're our friend… and he said you have enough to worry about without worrying about me too."

"Adam…" Meredith said in a soft tone as Adam watched her shake her head. "I'll always think about you… worry about you… we're friends." Meredith said softly. "That's what friends do…"

"Do you think when Emma feels better, she'll want to be my friend?" Adam asked. "Because… because I'm worried about her…" He shrugged.

"I'm sure that Emma would be more than delighted to have a friend as thoughtful as you, Adam…" Meredith said softly as the little boy smiled. He glanced to Ellis and back to Meredith again.

"That's not what she said when she pushed me down the other day." Adam said as he took a step back.

"What?" Meredith asked as the little boy held his hand up in protest.

"No, no… It's okay… she's been forgiven…." He shook his head as Meredith giggled at his reaction, glancing to Ellis. "Just as long as she gets better, that's all that matters." He said in a sincere tone. "If you don't mind, I'm going to go sit quietly over in that chair and wait." He said as he just turned around and walked away, as Meredith and Ellis stood speechless as the little boy slid into a chair and folded his hands in his lap, as he watched the bed, though Meredith couldn't help but let out a little giggle, as she glanced to her sleeping daughter, letting the smile slip from her face once more as she returned to worrying.

* * *

Meredith sat beside Emma's bed in the wheelchair, letting the little girl rest from her traumatic experience. Her hand was covering her daughter's as the little girl's questions echoed in her mind. She tried to forget the questions, she tried to wash the vision of the look on her daughter's face from her mind. She tried to pretend that everything was going to be just fine.

"Meredith?" Ellis said softly as she sat beside Adam, who was still sitting in the chair, his hands folded neatly in his lap as he stared at Emma and Meredith. Meredith did not look in their direction at first. "Meredith?" Ellis said with slightly more insistence as her daughter looked up at her. "Are you okay?"

"I'm… just scared." She admitted as she chewed her lower lip, her eyes flashed to Adam for a quick second as they focused back on Ellis. "Just…just scared." She said as she tried to give her mother a brave smile, failing miserably as her eyes told the truth.

"Would it make you feel better if I took Adam for a walk?" Ellis asked, tilting her head as she nodded toward Adam. "We can give you a little quiet time with Emma if you like." She shrugged, watching Meredith nod her head slowly, her eyes moving to the little boy. He gave her a small smile and tilted his head.

"Adam?" Meredith said as she turned the wheelchair around slightly, Adam smiled as he was addressed. "I bet you're hungry." She said, watching while Adam nodded his head in agreement.

"My tummy is growling…" He said as he rubbed his belly.

"Mine is too…" Meredith said softly. "Can you do me a big favor?" She asked as Adam nodded and slid from his chair. "Can you… go to the cafeteria with…" Meredith paused for a second, her eyes flashing to Ellis as she tried to think of how to address Ellis to Adam.

"Grandma?" Adam asked as he pointed toward Ellis, who smirked at her daughter as a curious glance flashed over her face.

"Um…" Meredith said with a slight giggle. "Yes… grandma… can you go to the cafeteria with her… and pick up um… a bagel and a fruit cup… for me… so my tummy won't growl anymore?"

"Sure thing!" Adam exclaimed as he turned excitedly. "Come on, Grandma… we have work to do!" He said as he ran toward the door. He reached up and grabbed the handle on the door as Meredith smirked at her mother.

Ellis shook her head and smirked back. "Hey… I had absolutely nothing to do with that…it was his idea."

"What about last night?" She asked as she raised her eyebrows, watching Ellis shrug.

"I may have had something to do with that… yes…" Ellis said with a laugh.

"Grandma, hurry… if we don't hurry, Meredith's going to be so hungry!" Adam said as he tugged on the doorknob. "Her tummy is going to eat her insides up… grrr… grrr… grrrrrr"

"We'll be right back." Ellis said as she tried not to laugh. "I think you have had enough drama for a while… your tummy eating your insides might be too much for you."

"Yeah… I think it might be…" Meredith giggled as she tipped her head and watched as Adam rushed Ellis out of the door as quickly as he could. Meredith's smile, however quickly disappeared as she turned her head back toward her sleeping daughter. She leaned forward and held Emma's hand, watching as her eyes fluttered open again. "Oh… there you are, baby…" She whispered as she smiled a sympathetic smile to the little girl, who watched her mother in confusion.

"Mama?" She said as she whimpered.

"My little girl…" She whispered as she swallowed, feeling her stomach twisting slightly.

"What happened?" She mumbled.

"Sweetie…" Meredith whispered, hoping to avoid the discussion, hoping to avoid the fear and anxiety, hoping that Emma was doing just a little better. "You just need to rest, baby…"

"Mama, but what happened?" She mumbled.

"Emma bear…" Meredith whispered. "Close your eyes baby… just close your eyes and relax… please, baby…"

"Mama… what happened? G-ma… Daddy…" She mumbled, her faint words were breaking Meredith's heart.

"How is she doing?" A soft voice came from behind her, her head turned as she recognized Mark standing in the doorway. He was holding a little pink bear in his hand. He stepped into the room and placed it on the table beside Emma's bed.

"She's confused." Meredith said as she held her daughter's hand. "She's… she's disoriented."

"It could just be the anesthesia…" Mark said as he walked into the room. "How are you doing?" Mark asked.

"I'm okay." She said softly as Mark walked toward the bed.

"Has she had another MRI done yet?" Mark asked as he pulled a pen light from his pocket, standing across from Meredith as he watched Emma turn her head slightly and look up at him, her eyes squinting.

"No…" Emma said as she closed her eyes.

"Emma, sweetheart… open your eyes…" Mark said as he touched her chin lightly. "I'm Doctor Sloan…"

"Stop!" Emma squeaked as she reached her hand up to slap Mark's.

"Emma…" Meredith said softly. "Emma, baby… Doctor Sloan wants to check you over… make sure you're…

"No! No!" She squeaked. "Mommy…" She squealed.

"Emma, stay still…" Meredith said as Mark took a step back.

"Well, she certainly has strength." Mark said as he gave Meredith a supportive smile. "What happened?"

"She was climbing." Meredith said softly as Emma glared up at him, turning her head toward Meredith.

"Were you climbing too?" He asked, nodding toward Meredith's knee with a smirk.

"I… was running up the stairs to check on her… when I heard the television fall… I fell on the stairs."

"Mama…?" Emma's voice interrupted her for a second, the anger was no longer in her eyes, replaced with a strange look of confusion. "What happened…?" She whispered as Mark looked into her eyes. There was a look of concern in his eyes as he tilted his head.

"What?" Meredith asked as he looked into the little girl's eyes. "Doctor Sloan… what is it? Do you… is there something? She has been doing that…. asking… resetting her thoughts to ask what's wrong… is that normal?" Meredith asked. "You said it could be the anesthesia… it's the surgery, isn't it? It's not anything more severe…right?" Meredith interrogated as Mark continued to look at the little girl from afar, Mark started to take the pen light from his pocket.

He put his hand near her face so he could look into her eyes and she screamed again at him to keep it away. "No! NO!" She screeched as she closed her eyes.

"Does she normally act this upset about things?" Mark asked.

"She's usually pretty laid back…" Meredith whispered. "But this is a strange place… the accident was traumatic… please tell me she's going to be…"

"Mama?" Emma muttered in a soft voice. "What happened?" She said again as Mark took a slow deep breath.

"She could have amnesia… it seems that… her short term memory is lapsing…" Mark mulled as he looked to Meredith.

"Amnesia? What do you mean? How long will that last? Is she going to be alright?" Meredith exclaimed as she tried to stand up.

"No… no… sit down, sit down…it's okay…" Mark said as he tried to help her back down into the wheelchair, and Meredith wasn't going to have any of that. She pushed herself forward into Emma's bed and kicked the chair backwards, sending it flying into the wall as she pulled herself away from Mark.

"Stop! Let go and just… just go!"

"I'm trying to help." Mark said softly as Meredith pushed at him.

"I don't want your help! I don't need your help! Just stop…" She said, breathlessly, pushing herself against the bed and away from Mark.

"Hey… hey, hey…" Derek said as he came into the room quickly after hearing the commotion from outside. He watched Mark back off and saw the fear in Meredith's eyes. He had no idea what had just happened, but Mark looked guilty, and Meredith looked angry. "What's going on in here?" Derek asked as the two of them stared at him blankly for a moment.

But it was Emma that broke the silence, her view was blocked from Derek, but she heard his voice, and her voice carried through the room and lifted his heart. "Derek!" Emma's voice squeaked as Derek watched the two speechless adults as he walked toward the bed.

"Are you alright?" He asked Meredith as he walked around them and the bed, to the other side. He leaned over Emma and pulled his pen light out.

"I'm… fine…" She said as she glanced to Mark and turned around.

"You?" Derek asked Mark as he pulled another light from his pocket and handed it to Emma… "Emma bear… I'm going to shine this light in your eyes okay? You have your light, so when I'm done, you can look in mine, okay?"

"Uh huh…" She muttered as she clicked the penlight on and off and looked at it.

"Look up…" He said as the little girl looked up and Derek flashed the light quickly in each of her eyes. "Beautiful…" He said with a smile as she lifted her light up at Derek and shined it in his eyes.

"Beautiful." She said, giggling a little as he reached his hand out and she set the light in it. "How are you feeling?" He asked the little girl, his eyes moving up quickly to Meredith, seeing intense panic in her eyes.

"Hurty…" She mumbled.

"Hurty? That's no good… We're going to have to up your IV of chocolate milk…" He said as he winked at her.

"Derek?" She whispered as she swallowed.

"What is it, baby?" Derek said as he touched her bandage tenderly, checking the machines as he noted out of the corner of his eye that both Meredith and Mark were staring at him.

"What happened…?" She asked softly.

"Well… you see…" Derek said as he leaned over the bed slightly and watched the little girl's eyes. "You were pretending that you were a monkey… and you did a double somersault flip in the middle of the air and landed on your pretty little head."

"Monkey?" She asked, her voice giggled a little, and Derek's eyes lifted to see Meredith staring at him.

"Yes… monkey… silly girl…" Derek said as he tilted his head. "Are you okay?" He asked as she shook her head. "Hey...do you mind if I go talk to Mommy for a minute? I'll be right back, okay?" He said as Emma smiled slightly.

Derek walked around the bed and glanced to Mark, who was watching the little girl in the bed, his eyes downcast as he passed him. He reached out for Meredith's hand, looking around for the wheelchair, he noticed that it was across the room against the wall. He glanced to her as she took his hand, and she shook her head. He then looked up at Mark, who turned his head to Emma. "Um… so I hope you feel better soon…Emma…" He said as he gave her a supportive smile, her head tilting curiously. "Meredith… I'm sorry…" Mark said softly as Meredith nodded, unsure of what to say, as Mark turned and walked from the room without another word.

As soon as the door closed, Derek looked at the wheelchair again. "Are you sure you're alright?" He asked.

"I'm fine…" Meredith nodded. "He was just… he was making sure I didn't fall, and I got frustrated and kicked the wheelchair… but Derek… Emma… she… I think she has amnesia…"

"Amnesia?" Derek said as he turned and glanced at the little girl as she tried to turn her head to look at them. "What would make you think she has anything other than after effects of the anesthesia?" Derek said as he glanced to Emma and gave her a tender smile. "What happened?"

"She keeps asking what happened…" Meredith replied. "She just keeps asking and keeps asking…"

"She's confused." Derek replied. "She has a fine memory… do you want me to run more scans? She still needs her post op work up… but she's fine, Meredith… I guarantee that she's fine… Who said that she had no short term memory?"

"Mark…" Meredith swallowed.

"He said she has amnesia?"

"He said she could… that her short term memory is lacking… that she can't remember…"

"And how often is she asking…?" Derek asked.

"About every minute…" Meredith whispered.

"Emma…" Derek said as he turned his head to the little girl. Her eyes met with his. "What did I say when I flashed the little light in your eyes?" He asked, knowing that she would remember, that Meredith was overreacting, but he wasn't about to tell her that.

"Beautiful…" the little girl said with a smile as Derek turned his head back to Meredith.

"Beautiful…" Derek whispered. "See that…" He said with a tilt of his head. "She's beautiful…"

"Derek… she…"

"I'm sure Mark had the best of intentions, Meredith… he wasn't trying to freak you out, scare you… But she is fine… she's waking up from the anesthesia… and she's scared, and she's going to ask a lot of questions. But her brain… is healing, her body is healing… Do you want me to do another CT?" He asked as he watched her glance to Emma and back to Derek.

"Do you think she needs one?" She whispered.

"No." He replied. "I think that it would be an unneeded test… and it'd just be more trauma on both of you, but if you want to…"

"Then no." Meredith said as she shook her head. "If you don't think she needs it, then… then no… she um… I…"

"You trust me?" Derek asked as he gave her a friendly smile as she swallowed and felt her cheeks burning slightly as she averted her gaze.

"Yes." She whispered. "I do trust you…" She said softly, her eyes turning to meet hers as he smiled. "How was… how is the intern thing going?"

"I went down there… met them quickly… and came right back up to you." He said with a smile. "I talked with the chief… She said she'll be up here to talk about your options for the program… see what you want to do as far as taking time off for it… and me…" He shrugged. "I took next week off." He said as he watched her eyebrows rise.

"Derek…?"

"I… figure… Emma will need to be here for at least a week… and your mother has to go home. You're going to need help, Meredith."

"Derek, I don't need…"

"You are going to need help." Derek said. "I'm not… walking away, Meredith. I'm not letting you walk away."

"So…" Meredith said as she watched him curiously, his hand was on her back, gently rubbing up and down soothingly as his eyes watched hers lovingly. "What you're trying to say… is that… you do house calls?" She asked as she listened to his chuckle deep in his throat, his smile lighting up his face.

"Only for my favorite patients…" He replied.

"So there have been others?" She asked with a laugh as Derek shook his head.

"No!" He laughed. "No others… my favorite one…patient…" He said with a laugh. "Will you let me help you?" He asked as he helped her lean against Emma's bed carefully as she supported herself and stood.

"Derek… I…" Meredith started to protest as he stood at the bedside, suddenly feeling a tiny hand slipping into his.

"Derek?" Emma mumbled sleepily as she tugged at it, Derek's face turning to look at her as she smiled softly. "Will you tell me another… story?" She asked as she gave him a sweet, sleepy smile.

"You want another story?" He asked as she smiled.

"Please…?" She mumbled.

"Well of course…" Derek said as he glanced to Meredith, whose eyes were on her daughter, a loving smile on her lips as her eyes lifted to Derek's. "If you'll excuse me?" He asked as Meredith giggled. He turned to Emma and winked. "Let's get mommy all comfortable first… then we'll tell that story." He said softly, as he walked over toward the wheelchair.

"Oh… Derek…?" Meredith said as she watched him turn his head as he was getting the wheelchair. "My mother will be back shortly… with Adam…" She said as she tilted her head and watched for his reaction.

"That kid? Eh…" He shrugged as Meredith smiled and shook her head.

"He apologized to me." Meredith said softly as she glanced to Emma.

"Of course he did…" Derek rolled his eyes. "He can't keep his birthday cake hole closed for two seconds…" He laughed.

"No." Meredith said with a smile, watching his face become serious as he watched her response. "He's right… I mean… that someone should be apologizing, he's right… but it shouldn't be him." She said as Derek helped her into the wheelchair, she reached back and grabbed his hand. "I'm sorry, Derek." She said softly as she watched a shred of confusion cloud his eyes as he tilted his head.

"There is no need to apologize." He said with a smile.

"No." Meredith replied. "There is…" She said as she watched Derek. "I shouldn't have treated you that way… I should have trusted you. I just… I didn't want… something that you couldn't fix... to happen… and… I didn't want you to see her that way, Derek… it was painful enough to not be able to do something for her… but to be in your situation… where you could help her… I didn't… I couldn't have done it, Derek… she was in so much pain… so hurt… and she's so small, so tiny… and… and…" Meredith said as tears began to fall onto her cheeks, Derek crouched down to her level.

"Meredith." He whispered as he watched her sniffle as she continued to allow the tears to fall. "It's all in the past." He whispered tenderly. "It's all in the past…" He said as he leaned forward slowly. He watched her sniffle slightly. "Are you okay?" He whispered as he moved even closer.

"I think… so…" She whimpered.

"I forgive you… I mean… if that's what you needed." He whispered, his soft breath brushing against her skin as she tipped her head forward, resting her forehead against his. "Do you forgive me?" He asked, watching the confusion in her eyes. "I didn't react the way I should have." He replied. "I should have listened to you… talked to you about Emma… and you were right… I was way too close to this case." He said. "But there isn't anyone in the world that I was going to let touch that beautiful little girl." He said as he felt her head tilt slightly, their lips only inches apart as he moved forward slightly, their lips barely brushing together, when Meredith pushed herself forward suddenly, pushing her lips against his hard, feeling the hair on the back of her neck stand on end as he kissed her back, his hand lifting to her cheek as she continued to nibble at his lip as he pulled away slightly, their eyes catching as he pulled away farther, his lips curling as he glanced to the bed, and back to Meredith. "Emma?" Derek said as he held Meredith's hand.

"Derek?" She said sleepily. "Where did you guys go?" She mumbled, noticing that they were no longer in her sights from the bed.

"We're right here…" Derek said softly. "Emma…?" He said softly as he turned his head and stared directly into Meredith's eyes. "What did I say about your eyes, when I shined that light into them?" He whispered.

"You said… beautiful…" She said, her voice was a soft, sweet tender whisper as she waited for his reply.

He paused for a moment as he continued to stare into Meredith's eyes, watching as they brimmed with more tears, only these were happier tears. "Beautiful." Derek said in a barely audible whisper, his eyes reflecting his gentle sentiment, as he squeezed her hand slightly in his hand, leaned forward delicately and left a chaste kiss on her lips, as he carefully stood up and stepped to Emma's bed. "Are you ready for your story?" He whispered, as he glanced to Meredith, smiling at her slightly flushed cheeks.

"Yes…" Emma said with a sleepy smile.

"Are you?" He asked Meredith, who was wiping the tears from her eyes.

"Yes." Meredith replied tenderly. "I'm ready…" She whispered. "I am… very ready." She said, as she pulled the wheelchair to the bed and grasped her daughter's hand, as Derek found a comfortable spot to sit on the end of her bed, and began the story.

* * *

Derek watched the little girl in the bed, her droopy gray-green eyes were watching him very carefully as he smiled at her. "Where do we start the story?" He asked as he watched Emma give him a sleepy smile.

"Beginning…" She said with a sleepy smile, watching Derek carefully as his eyes moved to her mother and back to her.

"How about… the middle?" Derek asked as he gave her a smile, watching as she nodded, her eyes drooping just a little more as she tilted her head. Derek looked over at Meredith, watching carefully as her eyes sparkled at him, he smiled into her eyes and then looked down at his hands. "Once…upon a time… there lived a prince…"

"A princess?" Emma asked.

"Nope, a prince… we'll get to the princess part…" He chuckled as she giggled. "Alright…" He said with a smile. "This prince lived in a very modest castle… with his little monkey friend… we'll call him… Aaron… Aaron the monkey." Derek said definitively as he smiled. "He was a fairly happy prince… he and Aaron did lots of things together… but he was kind of lonely too, though he never told Aaron that. He wasn't lonely because of his monkey friend, certainly not." Derek said as he shook his head. Emma listened intently as he continued the story, using voices and silly faces to represent different people. The longer both girls listened, the more familiar the story became to Meredith, as she found Derek projecting the story of himself into this prince.

"You know…" Meredith said at one point during Derek's story. "This prince is starting to sound awfully familiar." She said with a giggle.

"All characters that may resemble people real or fictional is purely a coincidence." Derek replied as Meredith giggled at the response, watching him smirk as he glanced toward the door. "I thought you said the kid was coming back?"

"They must have taken a detour." Meredith shrugged.

"By the way…" Derek said as he glanced to see that Emma had fallen asleep. "Your mom… she's good…" Derek chuckled. "She's really good…" He laughed.

"What does that mean?" She asked with a humored smirk.

"Oh, nothing…" Derek laughed as he glanced to the sleeping girl. "She looks so peaceful when she sleeps." Derek whispered.

"Hey…" Meredith said as she watched him carefully, tilting her head. "Aren't you going to finish the story?" She asked as Derek raised his eyebrows and laughed.

"You want me to finish the story?" He asked.

"I am intrigued." She said as she tilted her head. "What happened when the princess got home from the magic garden?"

"Well…" Derek said with a shy laugh. "She was sad… depressed… lonely… and she took a magic potion that made her all dizzy and disoriented… and when she was ready for bed… she stepped into her bedroom and landed funny on her bed." Derek replied. "And when she landed, she found a talking box lying on her bed." He watched as Meredith began to blush slightly. He knew that she was onto his story telling plan, and he liked right where he had her.

"What happened with the talking box?" She asked inquisitively.

"Well… the prince… was at his castle… sitting on his couch… and the jester had gone home… and he was reading quietly as he tried to find a way to sleep… it wasn't easy for him to sleep after hearing the jester's story of the princess he had met earlier that day. He had felt so connected to her… so warm when she had been around… so happy… that when he heard someone talking in the middle of the night, he jumped…"

"He jumped?"

"He jumped." Derek replied. "He followed the sound that he had heard, to a talking box that had been nestled into his couch…"

"He… found a talking box?"

"It wasn't his." Derek replied. "It was the jester's…"

"Derek?"

"That's right… the jester had left his talking box at the prince's castle… so what does the prince do?"

"What does he… do?" Meredith whispered.

"He answers it." Derek said with smirk.

"He…"

"He answered the talking box… and when he spoke into it, he heard the echo of someone else inside… the voice made his ears tingle… his body warm, his palms sweaty…. It was a beautiful voice."

"Derek…"

"A beautiful voice… of a princess… who had had a little too much magic potion… and she began to shout… and the more she shouted, the more the prince knew that she thought she was talking to the jester."

"The…"

"The prince let her shout, let her be angry… and when she was through, he asked her if she was done… and do you know what the princess said?"

Meredith's cheeks were bright red by now, and she couldn't answer the question, she was far too embarrassed. She watched Derek's smiling face as he continued. "No." She whispered.

"She said… that she expected the jester to hang up… and the jester might have… but the prince was far too captivated by the princess' voice." Derek replied. "So he calmed her down as best as he could… and he let the magic potion do it's magic… lulling her to a sleepy place."

"Derek…" She whispered.

"And before he closed the magic box… she asked him to stay with her… and the prince thought that maybe… in the depths of her heart…" Derek paused. "Maybe she knew she wasn't talking to the jester at all…" Derek smiled. "And so the prince stayed beside the talking box… humming the softest lullaby… until all he could hear was the tender sound of the princess' sleeping breath." He said as Meredith opened her mouth to say something to him, when suddenly the door opened.

"Derek…" Meredith said, her cheeks were bright red as Derek winked and stood up as Adam walked into the room.

"Look who brought breakfast!" Derek said with a smile as Adam grinned.

"We brought Meredith breakfast!" Adam said as he held the tray in his hands, a cup of orange juice balancing as the bagel in the plate slid around slightly. "Meredith, I'm sorry it took so long… there was a line…" He said as he looked to Ellis, who was watching Meredith's flushed cheeks as her daughter continued to watch Derek. Her daughter's eyes suddenly on the little boy.

"Why thank you so much, Adam…" Meredith said with a smile as she took the tray from the little boy and glanced to Derek. "Did you have your breakfast already?"

"Yes…. Grandma fed me…no growly tummies for me!" He said as he glanced to Ellis as she nodded. "Is Emma okay? How's her bandage? Does she need more of anything…?" He asked, his voice concerned.

"I think she's doing just fine." Derek replied with a tender smile, he glanced to Meredith as she gave him an inquisitive look. "So… I should get back to work…" He said as he nodded toward the door.

"Derek…" Meredith replied as she shook her head. "Derek, we need to…"

"We'll talk." He said with a smirk. "We'll talk, don't you worry." He said with a smirk as he walked around to her wheelchair and bent over slightly as he put his lips to her ear for a second. "Only one question though…"

"Hmm?" She mumbled.

"How long exactly has it been since someone has …" He whispered so that no one other than Meredith could hear.

"Derek!" Meredith exclaimed as her cheeks turned bright red and she leaned forward and put her head in her hands.

"Told you a story…" Derek said as he watched her laugh embarrassedly into her hands. Derek looked up and smirked at Ellis. Ellis smirked back at Derek and they both turned to look at Meredith. "She interrupts stories a lot…" Derek said with a chuckle as Ellis laughed.

"She's always been like that… trying to end the story the way she wants it to end." Ellis replied.

"Well…" Derek said as he shrugged a little, leaning down to kiss his son's head. "The story isn't over yet." He said with a laugh. "Think about how you'd like it to end, Meredith… and get back to me." He said as she looked up at him and smiled.

"I'll… let you know." She said as she shook her head. "Because I don't think I see it ending any time soon."

"Neither do I." Derek replied, as he stepped toward the door. "I'll be in a little later to check on you." He said softly as he grabbed the handle, and left the room, leaving Meredith flustered and happy, as she tried to control her reaction, as the door closed behind him.

* * *

Derek walked out of the room and turned the corner, as soon as he started to walk down the hallway, he noticed someone had stepped into his stride beside him. A glance to his right, and he raised his head, the smile falling from his lips. "Mark." Derek replied as he raised his eyebrows and slowed his steps, coming to a stop at the nurse's station, he grabbed Emma's chart from the rack atop the counter and flipped it open, turning around, he leaned against the counter.

"What were you doing back there?" Mark asked as he watched Derek pull a pen from his pocket and begin to write notes in the chart.

"What do you mean?" He asked as he looked up at Mark and back to the chart.

"Swooping in like that… what was that all about? You embarrassed me, man…" Mark said as he watched Derek continue to write notes. "Will you look at me?" He asked as Derek looked up at him for a second. He had a slight smirk on his face, not to be smarmy, but just feeling the warmth from his conversation with Meredith. He felt comfortable, free of worries, free of concern. He had told her the truth, and he felt that there had been a great weight lifted off his shoulders.

"I'm sorry that I embarrassed you." Derek said sincerely, looking at the frustration in his friend's eyes. "Listen." He said as he shrugged. "Meredith and I have sort of a history… albeit very short… but I have a special place in my heart for her… I always have." He said as he shrugged. "Well, I have since the day I met her…"

"You just walked into that room and took control… I didn't do anything to her, Derek."

"She didn't say that you did, and I am not going to judge." Derek said as he shrugged. "Just know, Mark…" He said sincerely and seriously. "If she says back off… she means back off… and if you don't back off… she'll kick your ass before I even have a chance to react."

"What the hell is that supposed to mean?" Mark asked.

"It means… she doesn't need help… if she needed help, she'd ask. Her kid is in the hospital… and it was a really scary thing… she doesn't need your speculations… or anyone else's speculations… Let me stick with the neuro patients, you can stick with your patients, and then we won't have a problem." Derek shrugged. "Why are you so interested in her anyway?"

"Because she's beautiful… and she's funny…" Mark shrugged.

"You got that from your ten minute conversation with her?" Derek chuckled.

"Are you going to pursue her, Derek?" Mark asked as he watched Derek look up at Mark. "I want to know if you're going to pursue her."

"I honestly think that you should just back off." Derek replied. "But that's only me… if you would like to ask her out… I recommend that you wait until her daughter is in the clear… and if she declines… I recommend that you accept that." Derek said as he continued to write in the chart, flipping it closed. "And I'd also appreciate it if you'd keep my son out of our discussions. If you don't want to watch him, that's fine… if I make a mistake, by all means yell at me… but don't throw it in my face in front of him. Don't show him disrespect by disrespecting me, because when you toss him off back to me because you're no longer interested in watching him… you're telling him he's worthless to you, and I know that he's not. I think you owe him an apology." Derek said as he looked Mark in the eyes as he tossed Emma's chart down on the rack on the counter.

"Derek…"

"He's in Emma's room with Meredith and her mother." Derek said softly as he glanced at his watch. "I have to go… I'll see you around." He said as he turned and started walking down the hallway as Mark stared after him, relatively confused.

* * *

Mark found himself staring back down the hallway as Derek disappeared around the corner. He glanced back to the room down the hallway, and again to the corner where Derek had disappeared. He was fairly confused by Derek's answer, almost expecting him to tell him to stay away from Meredith, maybe yell at him for sending her into an anxious tizzy that had put them at odds. He felt guilty for making her panic, and gave himself a mental smack for saying things without thinking. He thought of Adam, and how he had shouted at Derek in his frustration, handing over the poor kid like he was throwing him out, and he felt his stomach twist a little. He looked to the ceiling and cursed Derek in his head for making him feel this way, picturing the little boy's crystal blue eyes and his round little face, the way he called him 'M-dawg', even when Derek told him not to. He knew that kid loved him, and now he felt bad for making him hurt. He grunted, clearing his throat and walked toward the room.

Mark stepped up to the door and placed his hand on the door handle, taking a deep breath, he walked into the room. At first, his presence went unnoticed, he watched as Adam leaned over the wheelchair with Meredith as she sat beside her daughter's bed. Adam was entranced by the woman sitting in the wheelchair, his smile was bright as he chattered as she ate, his voice giggling as he caught the movement out of the corner of his eyes and pulled back off the wheelchair. His eyes now on Mark, as Meredith turned slightly and saw him standing by the door.

"It appears we have a guest." Ellis said softly as Adam leaned back on his heels, his eyes were unsure at first as he glanced to Meredith.

"Meredith…" Adam said as he glanced to Ellis. "That's Mark." He said as he pointed at Mark as he stood in the doorway.

"I know who he is…" Meredith said with a soft voice as Adam grabbed Meredith's hand. "Hello again, Doctor Sloan." She said with a soft smile, that made Mark feel a little less intrusive.

"I'm sorry… to um… to bug you guys, I just needed to apologize." He said as he watched Meredith tilt her head.

"Mark yelled at Daddy." Adam said with a huff. "He's not my friend anymore." Adam said as he turned his back on Mark and pushed himself into Meredith as he crossed his arms over his chest.

"Hey…" Mark said as he took a step into the room. "Don't you think that's just a little harsh?" Mark said, the guilt in his belly dropping like a rock.

"No." Adam replied. "You called me a baby too…" Adam mumbled. "Meredith, he called me a baby…"

"I did not call you a baby." Mark said, shaking his head. "I thought you were my wingman…?"

"Nope." Adam replied. "Did you say sorry to daddy?" He asked, giving Mark a glare as Meredith watched the exchange closely, exchanging glances with her mother.

"I didn't… no."

"Then I don't want to hear sorry from you." Adam said with his back to Mark.

"Meredith." He said at first, and his eyes moved to Ellis. "Doctor Grey…" he said as he realized that he actually hadn't introduced himself to Ellis. "I'm Doctor Sloan… Mark… Helen's son?" He said as he held out his hand. "We hadn't been formally introduced."

"It's a pleasure to meet you, Mark…" Ellis said as she shook his hand.

"Hey… don't you be sucking up to grandma… she's mad at you too!" Adam exclaimed as Mark's eyes widened.

"Grandma?" Mark asked.

"His insistence…" Ellis replied as Mark chuckled nervously.

"Adam…" Mark said as he crouched beside the wheelchair beside Meredith and faced the little boy's back as he looked away. "Please?" He said softly. "Please don't be mad at me… I'm sorry I yelled at your daddy… I'm sorry I made you upset with me…" He turned his head to Meredith, who was watching with an amused expression. "I'm sorry I freaked you out a little." Mark said with an apologetic grimace.

"I know." Meredith nodded. "Adam." Meredith said softly as the little boy turned his head to look at her. "Mark did apologize to you… don't you think it would be polite of you… to forgive him?"

"But he…"

"And he said he's sorry… he's your friend… friends make mistakes… he loves you very much…" Meredith said, seeing the look of sorrow on Mark's face.

Adam paused and watched Meredith's eyes, glancing back to Mark. "Are you sure?"

"Am I sure of what?" Mark asked.

"That you're sorry…" Adam replied. "You are sorry for hurting daddy's feelings? For hurting my feelings?"

"I'm very sorry." Mark said. "See…" He pointed to the bear on the table that he had set down earlier. "I even brought that teddy bear over there for Emma."

"You brought that for Emma?" Adam asked as he walked around Mark and reached up onto the counter Mark walked toward the counter as well and watched Adam. He pulled the bear down and looked at it carefully. "Are you just sucking up to Emma too?" He asked as he scrutinized Mark carefully.

"I'm not sucking up to anyone…" Mark said seriously, hearing Ellis' and Meredith's soft giggle.

"Are you sure?"

"I'm sure… I just came in here to tell you I was sorry." Mark said softly.

"So you don't want to kiss Meredith too?"

"What?" Mark asked, swallowing hard as he caught the little boy's words.

"Like Daddy… daddy likes Meredith, and likes to kiss her… and you like Meredith too, don't you? She's Daddy's friend… so you have to back off."

"Adam…" Mark cleared his throat.

"I'll be your wingman… but you and Daddy can't share Meredith. She is a mommy… and you don't need one of those." Adam said seriously. "I do." He shrugged. "She's my friend, and daddy's friend."

"Can she just be my friend?" Mark asked, giving Adam a sideways glance as Adam turned to look at Meredith.

"Meredith… do you want to be Mark's friend?" He asked as he sighed.

"I think Mark would be a very good friend, Adam." Meredith said as she watched Mark roll his eyes behind Adam's back, before the little boy turned to face Mark.

"Fine." Adam said as he sighed. "You can be my friend… and you can be Meredith's friend… but you need to tell Daddy you're sorry."

"I'll talk with your daddy." Mark replied.

"Do you promise?" Adam asked.

"Would I lie to you?" Mark asked.

"I sure hope not." Adam sighed as he held his hand out. "Low five?" he asked.

"Low five…" Mark said as he slapped the little boy's hand and ruffled his hair. "You drive a hard bargain."

"Yep." Adam said as he turned around and walked toward the bed with the bear, leaning up, he placed it beside Emma.

Mark stood up and walked to Meredith. He crouched beside her wheelchair and looked up into her eyes. "Even Derek didn't tell me to stay away." He said softly.

"I don't know if Derek explained our history together, Mark… but he knows that I'm going to do whatever I want. He knows that I'm a free spirit... he understands that." She explained. "I appreciate your apology… and I know that you meant well… I hope that we can be friends though."

"Well… since I'm going to be one of your bosses… I think we can arrange a friendship." He said with a smile as he glanced to Adam as he walked back toward them. "I should probably get back to work… but I wanted to stop in and apologize before I got too busy."

"I appreciate it." She said softly.

"I'll talk to you later." He said softly as she nodded. He stood up and ruffled Adam's hair again as he waved toward Ellis. "Doctor Grey, it was a pleasure to meet you."

"Likewise, Mark." Ellis said softly as Mark nodded politely, and quietly excused himself from the room.

* * *

Derek stepped out of the scrub room and sighed, he couldn't help but have a slight smile on his lips as he glanced at his watch. It was officially the end of his work day, and he was now on his way down the hallway toward ICU. He had checked in on Emma's status several times during the day, sending a nurse or two that he could trust to check on her and Meredith, always getting the same answer, that they were fine, and for him to stop worrying. He had become so busy between surgeries and intern questions, that he hadn't even found time to sit down and take a break. He walked quickly toward the rooms and just as he reached the room, the door opened, and Ellis backed slowly out, closing the door behind her. She turned around, just in time to see Derek slowing as he reached the room.

"They're sleeping." Ellis remarked softly.

"All three of them?" Derek asked, a tender smile on his lips as Ellis nodded.

"Adam was able to convince Meredith that she looked tired… and told her that she might need a nap. She's snuggled with him right now on the spare bed, I thought I'd step out to make some phone calls." She said as she held up her cell phone. "Never a dull moment as Chief…" She nodded.

"Did Chief Jones come down here to talk to Meredith?" Derek asked.

"She did… We all discussed the options… between Emma's condition and Meredith's knee, she decided two weeks off, and when she came in she'd be on scut and clinic duty for the most part until she's up for standing for long periods of time. The intern program here is really remarkable… I'm so glad she decided not to stay in Boston."

"Oh come on…" Derek said with a chuckle. "You just don't want her honing in on your territory." He laughed as Ellis shook her head. "And Adam?"

"That is one little spitfire of a little boy you have there, Doctor Shepherd… You had better watch him… he's too smart for his own good… and I think he's trying to outdo you in the charming department."

"Outdo me? No way… I taught him everything he knows." Derek smirked as his eyes followed Ellis as she walked around him.

"I don't know about that, Derek…" Ellis said as she nodded towards the room. "I think he's figured out a few things for himself…" She said as she giggled. "I'll be back in a little while… keep them safe." She said as she watched him smile.

"Always." He said, turning and walking through the doorway.

He paused for a moment as he stepped into the room, noting the local lighting. A small light beside Emma's bed was on, and the dim light beside the window was still lit, but for the most part, the room was darkened of the harsh fluorescent lighting. He looked first to the bed where the small child lay, her eyes closed peacefully as the machines that were monitoring her continued to beep softly, muted slightly as not to annoy, only to inform. He listened to the sounds at first, wishing that all he could hear would be the tender sound of her breathing, a soft yawning sigh from her lips as she slept.

He lifted the chart from beside her bed, scanning through the tests and results. He smiled to himself as he noted that everything appeared normal in her tests, though she had spent most of the afternoon sleeping, and he knew that it was good, it was all good for healing. As he thought of healing, his eyes caught sight of the other bed. Meredith lying on her back, a blanket pulled up to her chest, and atop her shoulder, wrapped in her arm lay his son. His nose was buried in her shoulder, his eyes closed tightly as he slept, a small tender smile on his lips as he snore lightly against Meredith's skin. He felt his heart begin to feel heavy, knowing that Adam's heart was becoming set on Meredith again. He remembered those days following that Christmas, and the pain and sadness that Adam felt in his heart.

He thought for only a second back then, that he should be angry at Meredith for the way she made his son feel, but it didn't take long for his senses to realign with the knowledge that Adam was just a little boy. Little boys have an amazing ability to use their imagination for some of the wildest ideas, and while convincing Meredith that Christmas with him would be the better choice, he knew in the long run that she needed to straighten things out on her own. He was, after all, a stranger. It wasn't his job to pick her up and pull her through this horrible rough patch, it wasn't his responsibility as a stranger to follow her, to find her, to carry her through her sorrow. He could tell that she was a strong, capable woman. If she wasn't, she wouldn't have gotten that far. He knew back then… that even though he wanted to lift her into his arms and never let her go… that she would resent him. She needed to continue her journey… and if it led her back to him, then… he could take that chance.

Yet… here she was… lying before him… his own best friend battling for her attention… and he couldn't even then say that he wished to pursue her. Maybe it was fear… Maybe he was thinking of the past…maybe it was knowing that it wasn't his decision… Maybe it was knowing that she had walked away before, and it could just as easily happen a second time…. Whatever it was… he knew he needed to step it up. He knew that he was falling for her, and he wasn't going to lose her again. He just wished he knew how to secure his chances, how to make her fall for him without her knowing it, without him knowing it, because he was better left in the dark on things like this. He always found that things like this were better left to fate. He watched Meredith's lips move in the dim light, and found that his own lips were moving slightly, perhaps longing to touch her lips, perhaps tasting the tender, sweetness that had covered his mouth earlier, perhaps even longing to hear the sound of her voice passing between them as she said his name.

He continued to stand beside Emma's bed, staring across the room at the beautiful angel that lie in that bed, resting peacefully as she fought nightmares and sadness in her heart. Watching as she breathed easier while she kindly wrapped her arm around her tiny bed companion, who Derek was very sure had probably convinced she'd sleep better that way, probably using some sort of tactic like that devilish grin, or his patented 'I can keep you warm' excuse that he had always fallen for.

"Derek?" Emma's voice whistled into his ears, startling him slightly as his trance that was focused on Meredith was broken, and he turned immediately to face the little girl, the smile on his face was genuine and happy, and she smiled a sleepy smile back at him.

"Hmm…?" He whispered.

"Did the princess and the prince… live happily ever after?" She whispered, swallowing hard as she watched Derek's eyes carefully.

"The princess and the prince?" He whispered.

"From the story… that you were telling me and Mommy…"

"Oh…" He whispered with a nod as he pulled leaned carefully over her bed and looked her directly in the eyes. "I almost forgot…" he said with a sideways grin that made the little girl giggle.

"So?" She whispered as she watched Derek's eyes move across the room to the little boy lying in Meredith's arms. "Did they?" She whispered, as his focus came back to her.

"What do you think?" He whispered, watching as the little girl smiled a sleepy smile.

"I think… that the princess… and the prince… I think that they lived happily ever after…" She said with a sigh.

"You do?" He asked as she nodded slightly.

"Yes…" She replied.

"And how do you think that the prince was able to do that?" Derek asked. "How did the prince capture the princess's heart?" He whispered.

"He brought her the magical shoes, silly…" Emma whispered.

"The magical shoes?" Derek whispered.

"Yes… the red slippers." She said as she looked at Derek for a moment and a slight confused look came over her features. "Um…"

"The red slippers…" Derek smiled, watching as the little girl saw the recognition in Derek's eyes, and the fear in her eyes quickly disappeared. "Of course…" He whispered.

"Derek?" Emma whispered as she swallowed again.

"Hmm, baby?" Derek asked.

"Will you be my boyfriend?" She said, watching Derek's eyebrows go up in surprise as he smiled and tilted her head at the little girl.

"Your boyfriend?" He asked as Derek laughed.

"Yeah…" She said with a slight shy giggle, avoiding eye contact. "You can be my prince and marry me… and I'll be the princess… and you… you can get me the pretty red slippers… and… I dunno…" She said as her voice became softer, and her eyes looked away from Derek farther.

"Hey…" Derek said softly as he tilted his head. "Hey, little one… look… look at me…" He said as he touched her nose lightly, watching her eyes look up at him as she gave him a hopeful smile. "I'm a boy… right?" He asked as he watched her nod her head. "And I'm your friend…"

"Uh huh…" She said as she nodded slightly.

"Then it's settled… I'm your boyfriend…" He winked as she giggled. "But only because you asked first." He winked as he leaned forward and kissed her forehead. "You must be pretty hungry…"

"Oh yes!" She exclaimed, her voice loud as she lifted her hand to cover it quickly.

Derek laughed. "It's alright… those two are lazy bones…" He said as he shrugged. "Let me get you something special for your dinner… I haven't eaten yet either… we can have our first date… what do you think?" He said as he watched the little girl smile at him. "That's what I thought…" He winked at her, as he reached for the phone, listening to her happy giggle as it made his heart flutter.

* * *

Derek sat quietly at Emma's bedside while she rested, her eyes were on him the entire time as he talked softly and made her giggle. "I am having the nurse bring them food too… is that alright with you?" He asked as he nodded toward the other bed, watching Emma nod politely. Derek glanced over at the bed and watched as Adam sleepily lifted his head. "Well, speak of the devil…" Derek said as Adam gave him a humored smirk.

"What devil? I am no devil… I'm a sweet boy…" Adam replied as he looked down at Meredith and looked up at Derek. He watched Adam's smirk widen. "What?" The little boy asked as he watched Derek's head turn to see Emma trying to look around him.

"Who is that over there?" Emma whispered.

"Hey…" Adam said as he tipped forward, seeing Emma looking over at him. "She's awake!" He said excitedly as he rolled sideways slightly.

"Adam… be…" As Derek said the words, the little boy rolled clear off the bed, landing on the hard linoleum floor with a winded thump. "Careful…" It took only a second, but the little boy jumped from his spot and looked over the bed at Derek. "Are you alright?"

"Yes…" he said with a laugh. "Emma's awake!" He said with an excited whisper as he moved around the bed toward Derek.

"Adam?" Emma asked as she turned her head and spoke sleepily. She watched as the little boy mae his way to the bedside, climbing onto his father's lap.

"Thank goodness you're awake!" Adam exclaimed. "I was worried sick…" He said as Emma watched him for a moment.

"Why is he here?" Emma asked suddenly with an irritated glare toward Adam. Her eyes were showing a level of pain that Derek was not prepared for, and had not expected to see. "He was mean to me, and he was mean to my mommy… make him go away…" She whimpered as she closed her eyes.

"I was not mean to you!" Adam exclaimed as Derek watched the exchange of words, Adam was becoming louder as he became defensive, and his eyes flashed to his father for backup. "I was just mad at you." Adam replied, calming slightly as he noticed his father wasn't going to say anything. Derek watched and remained quiet. He thought that it would just be easier if the two children worked out their differences together instead of him speaking up.

"You were mean, Adam." Emma replied, her eyes filling with tears.

"Aww… don't cry, Emma! Please? I said I was sorry… I was mad… I said things cuz I was mad… I am sorry… and you even got to push me down… I said sorry to your mommy… I said I was sorry, she's my friend. I would like you to be my friend again too." He whimpered as he leaned forward, tears filling his own eyes as he sighed and whimpered.

"I don't want to be your friend." She said with an angry whisper as tears began to flow down her cheeks, watching Adam cry as well. He watched her sniffle as her eyes met his, sparkling in the dim light as she looked into the sadness in his eyes.

"But if you don't want to be my friend… what do I do if I want to be your friend?" Adam whimpered as his eyes moved to Derek, and back to Emma once more.

"Too bad." She said with a sad whimper, biting her bottom lip as she closed her eyes. "Go away." She whispered as she waited for Adam to ask again. She waited for him to beg or plead or bargain, but instead she just heard him sniffle. She heard him sniffle, and then she heard him shifting around, and after another moment, she heard the clomping of shoes across the room. When she opened her eyes, Adam was gone. Derek sit in the chair beside her bed, his eyes sorrowful as he looked across at the little boy climbing back up onto the other bed. "Adam?" She whimpered, feeling a sad feeling deep down in her tummy.

"Adam is over with your mommy now, sweetheart." Derek said, turning his eyes to the little girl.

"Mommy?" Emma whimpered as she watched Derek look over to Meredith and Adam, watching Meredith move slightly in her sleep. "Mommy?" She whimpered again. Meredith jumped with a start, sitting up quickly as if she wasn't sure where she was, she sat disoriented for a second.

"Meredith." Derek said as her head turned to face him, a soft, sleepy smile on her face as she turned to see Emma looking at her. She then turned to see Adam lying on the bed, tears on his cheeks with his thumb in his mouth.

"Oh…" Meredith whispered to the little boy touching his hair as she looked to Derek. "What happened?" She whispered, her eyes on Emma, noticing the tears on her cheeks.

"There was a bit of a discussion that you missed." Derek nodded as she watched him with a confused glance, her eyes on her daughter, and back at Adam. Derek stood up and walked toward her. "Do you need any help?" He asked as she shook her head, leaning back onto her pillow as she watched Emma watch her as Derek walked around the bed and lifted Adam into his arms. Adam put his arms around Derek's neck and rested his head on his shoulder, his thumb finding its way to his mouth as Derek walked over to the chair.

"I'm hungry…" Meredith mumbled as she watched Derek smile at her as he sat down slowly.

"Don't you worry… that's being taken care of…" Derek said with a knowing smirk as Meredith shook her head and laughed lightly.

* * *

Meredith watched Derek for a moment, his eyes were sparkling as he rocked his son, Adam's sniffling was sad and the little boy's eyes were affixed on hers as she tilted her head. "Oh…Adam…" Meredith whispered as the little boy cuddled against his father's shoulder a little more.

"Are you feeling sorry for him?" Derek asked as he turned to watch Meredith as she gave him a sad face back, showing her dislike for Adam's sadness.

"No…" Meredith said softly. "Poor baby…" She whispered.

"That sounds like you're feeling sorry for him…" Derek replied.

"He's so sad… What did you do to him, Emma?" Meredith asked as her daughter sniffled.

"I… I…" Emma stammered as she sniffled again.

"He's just playing it up…" Derek replied. "Don't you fall for it too." Derek said as he glanced to Emma.

"But he's crying…" Emma whispered. "I made Adam cry…"

"Adam will be just fine." Derek replied.

"No I won't…" Adam said, pulling his thumb from his mouth, he rolled backwards and slid from Derek's neck, sitting in his lap, he refused to look at Emma. "She doesn't want to be my friend." Adam swallowed, rubbing the tears from his eyes. "I stayed here to wait for her to wake up… I was worried sick… and I said I was sorry… and does she want to be my friend? No. No she doesn't…"

Derek smirked as he glanced to Meredith, who listened to the little boy's pity party as he looked to the floor. She shook her head at Derek's smirk.

"You're picking on him…" Meredith replied.

"What?" Derek asked. "I haven't said a word!" He exclaimed.

"Adam… Adam… you can be my friend… I'm sorry…" Emma whispered.

"No… No thank you, very much." Adam said as he buried his head into Derek's arm as Derek continued to smirk.

"Derek, stop that!" Meredith said as Derek chuckled, unable to hold in his laughter any longer.

"Stop what?" Derek asked. "I'm not doing anything… I'm not doing anything!"

"Come over here, baby…" Meredith said as she held her hand out. "Come over here to me… and help me into that wheelchair… and you can sit with me, and I'll give you hugs without laughing…" Meredith said in a sweet voice as the little boy pulled from his father's arms and ran over to Meredith, watching her pull herself up, she slid from the bed as Derek continued to laugh, rubbing the bridge of his nose with his fingers as Adam held Meredith's hand and helped her shift to the wheelchair. She slid into the chair and pulled the little boy into her lap, careful not to hit her knee, and she rolled the wheelchair toward Derek.

"Mama… tell Adam I'm sorry…" Emma said, unsure of what Derek was laughing at as she watched her mother roll the wheelchair across the room toward Derek. When she came up beside him, she reached her hand out and smacked him on the arm.

"Ow! That hurt!" Derek said with a laugh as he glanced to Emma. "Are you going to let her treat me like that?" He asked the little girl as Emma giggled.

"Mama, don't hit!" She said with a little giggle through her tears. "Adam, I'm sorry… I'm sorry I made you sad…" She exclaimed as Adam looked up at Derek laughing, and Emma tried to turn her head to look at him. "Please… I'm sorry." She said as Adam watched the pleading in the little girl's eyes.

"Okay." Adam said as he cuddled Meredith and glared at his father. "Okay, Emma… I'll be your friend…" He said softly. "But now I'm mad at you!" He said as he pointed at Derek.

"Me? You're mad at me? Why me?" Derek asked innocently.

"Laughing at a poor sad boy… you should be ashamed." Adam said as he gave his father a glare.

"Oh yeah?" Derek asked as he reached across and tickled the little boy. "I'll give you poor sad boy… I'll give you poor sad boy."

"Daddy! Ah! Stop tickling!" He squeaked as he squirmed on Meredith's lap, his angry face turning into a fit of giggles as a knock came at the door.

Derek stopped tickling and raised his eyebrows. "This isn't over between us, junior…" He said as Meredith smiled at Derek as Adam cuddled her and they all watched Derek walk across the room. He opened the door and thanked the nurse, pulling four trays from the cart as he talked to her politely. Meredith listened to him chuckle and make a comment, and then watched as he turned around and smiled as he walked through the room with the trays.

"So are you through flirting with the staff?" Meredith asked, raising her eyebrows as Derek smirked and set the tray down.

"Flirting? I don't flirt… and especially not with my girlfriend in the room." He said as he watched Meredith's jaw drop slightly, and a sharp intake of breath as her eyes widened. "Right, sweetie." He winked at Emma, who giggled and smiled.

"Right…" She said with a little giggle as she watched him, her eyes sparkling as he looked over toward Meredith, her face bright red and full of embarrassment as she realized he was talking about Emma.

"Oh…" Derek said with a fake chuckle. "You thought I meant you?"

"No… Um… no…" She stammered as she tried to control the redness in her cheeks as Derek pulled the cover from the first tray and placed it on one of the lap trays, followed by a second one as he rolled it toward Meredith and Adam. "So…" She coughed as Derek pulled the cover from his own tray and Emma's, and then turned to look toward her. "How long have you two been dating…?" She asked as she tried her best not to smirk.

"It's been a few minutes now… almost a half hour… right, sweetie?" He asked Emma, who giggled once again as she nodded.

"Wow, Derek…" Meredith giggled as she glanced around for silverware. "You really like them young…" She giggled as Derek laughed.

"She asked first." Derek shrugged as he pulled the forks from the small bag. "She was so sweet about it too… asking if I would be her boyfriend… she wants to marry me…" Derek said as Emma continued to giggle. He held one fork in each hand and grinned. "Alright… are you ready?" He asked as Emma and Meredith exchanged a glance.

"Yes!" Adam exclaimed, knowing what was coming, he watched Derek flick his index fingers forward with the forks resting on them, and in a smooth movement, he began to spin the forks around his fingers over and over again, laughing at the reaction from Adam, as Emma's jaw dropped, and Meredith's eyes began to fill with tears. Derek stopped spinning the forks, flipping into the air, he caught them with each hand and looked between mother and daughter.

"I've never had that reaction before…" He said, his eyes showing his confusion as Meredith wiped the tears from her eyes and sniffled.

"Just give me the fork." She snapped as she reached for the fork left on the tray beside her, she looked down in her tray and began to eat in silence.

Derek swallowed as he watched her retreat very quickly, his eyes moving to Emma as she stared at her food on her tray. "What's going on?" He asked as he and Adam exchanged a look. "Meredith?"

"Just sit down and eat." Meredith replied as she refused to look up, handing Adam the other fork from the tray as he began to eat cautiously.

"Derek?" Emma whispered as she watched Derek sit down with the forks, her eyes lifting to his as she gave him a supportive smile. "I thought it was fun." She said, her eyes sparkling at him as he smiled slightly at her. He glanced to Meredith as she continued to stare at her plate.

"See that…" He said as he smiled. "My girlfriend liked my fork flipping…" He said as Emma giggled. He watched Meredith closely as she continued to eat, staring at her plate, finally, her eyes lifted to his.

"Of course she does…" Meredith said with a glint of mischievousness in her eyes. "She's just trying to butter you up so she can dump you." Meredith said with a sad smirk. "She does that with all of her boyfriends."

"Oh…." Derek said as he glanced to Emma. "Are you going to take that?"

"I don't know what she's talking about…" Emma giggled as she scooped up a tiny bit of applesauce from her tray and tasted it. She made a funny face and glanced at Derek. "This stuff tastes like poopy…"

"I bet it does…" Derek said as he looked down at his tray and glanced to Meredith, noting that half of her food was gone. "But it doesn't look like mommy seems to mind that fact." He said as Meredith looked up from her tray.

"Oh hush and eat." She said as she nudged Adam, who giggled and scooped a bit of food from his own tray, shoveling it into his mouth.

* * *

Derek helped Emma with her spoon, talking her through the bland taste of the hospital food, she made funny faces that made the four of them laugh.

"I like hospital food." Adam said as he took a big bite of mashed potatoes and glanced to Meredith's plate. "Are you gonna eat those?" He asked Meredith with a mouthful, as a bit of potato fell from his mouth, looking up at her.

"Don't talk with your mouth full…" Meredith and Derek said at the same time, their eyes moving to one another's as they smirked. "Please." Meredith finished as she giggled, watching Adam look between the two of them. She shook her head as she scooped the mashed potatoes from her plate and placed them onto the little boy's. "You need to eat as much as you can… you're a growing boy… you're far too thin… What does he eat?" Meredith asked as she looked up at Derek, who looked taken aback by her questioning and laughed as he scooped a little more food onto the spoon and carefully shoveled it into the little girl's mouth.

"That boy eats whatever he wants…" Derek said with a laugh. "And it's a lot… trust me…"

"He starves me." Adam said as he shoved a forkful of food into his mouth as he munched on it, he glanced at Meredith. "I am such a hungry boy. I hardly eat nothing…" He said as he shook his head.

"Yeah, sure he does…" Meredith said as she shook her head at Derek, who laughed as he gave Emma another spoonful of food. She watched as he whispered something to her, and she watched the little girl's reaction. Her eyes were looking directly into his, and she smiled a little as she nodded and replied to him.

"You are very cute together." Meredith said, half joking as she tilted her head, watching Derek's attention turn back to her.

"Oh yeah?" He asked with a humored expression as Meredith nodded. "Well, thank you." He smiled. "I thought you might be a little jealous… I'm glad that you're being a grown up…"

"Derek…" Emma said as Derek turned his head toward the little girl. "She is a grown up." She whispered.

"She is?" Derek turned her head as he looked to Meredith and back to the little girl. "I thought she was your younger sister." He said to Emma, who let out a laugh.

"My younger sister?" She laughed, her eyes shimmering as she looked over at Meredith. Her mother smiled, letting out a laugh as Adam sat on her lap, his cheeks full of mashed potatoes as he looked between the three other people.

"Well… I hope you two are very happy together." Meredith said. "Because there are some eligible bachelors out there who have been looking to ask me out… I wanted to make sure that you and Emma were happy together before I asked them out… Didn't want to step on any toes." She said as she nodded her head and watched Derek smile.

"Oh… you can date Adam if you want…he's a gentleman…" Derek said as he put a bit of mashed potato in his mouth, then brought a cup of water to his lips as he started to drink from it.

"Oh… Adam? He's not my type… not for a boyfriend." Meredith said as Derek sipped a little more. "I was thinking more along the lines of Mark." She said as suddenly, Derek breathed in the sip of water, sending it straight into his lungs. He aspirated and sent water spraying across the room as he started to cough in surprise.

He coughed violently as Meredith started to laugh, his eyes wide with surprise as Adam pointed at his father. "Oh my gosh, Daddy! You're spraying water like a fountain!" He exclaimed as Derek continued to cough, catching his breath as he grabbed his chest and coughed a little more.

"Are you okay?" Meredith giggled as Derek gave her a faux glare, his head shaking as he glanced to Emma, who was watching in concern.

"Are you okay, Derek?" Emma asked as she reached for his hand, watching as Derek nodded toward her.

"I'm okay… I'm okay…" Derek said as he glanced to Meredith as tears rolled down his cheeks from his coughing fit. "I'm okay…"

"Daddy… wowee, you got everything all wet!" Adam exclaimed as he looked to the water that had been sprayed across the floor.

"Yes… yes, I did…" Derek said as he coughed a little more, setting his cup on the table, he turned his back on everyone else and began to clean the mess. He wiped the mess from the floor, and avoided eye contact with Meredith and Adam, as he listened to Adam sliding carefully from Meredith's lap. "Hey." He said as he looked up suddenly at Meredith as he watched Adam climb up on the other bed and sit with his hands behind his head as he stared at the blank television set.

Meredith tipped her head and watched him as she smiled at him slyly. "I'm sorry." She said sincerely, watching his eyes as he smiled back at her. "That was kind of a cheap shot." She said softly as he tossed the paper towels into the trash can.

"Yeah… yeah it was…" Derek said with a smile. "And after all we've been through…" Derek shook his head. "Engagement, marriage… baby…"

"Baby?" Meredith asked with a laugh as he walked back to his seat and watched her smile.

"You don't remember our baby?" Derek laughed. "Come on… you have to remember the baby… on the plane? I had to go and check on you in the bathroom… you and I were married…it couldn't have been more than a few minutes by then." He said with a chuckle as she remembered his ploy to get her to sit in first class with he and Adam.

"Oh!" Meredith laughed. "Yes! The baby! About that…" She said. "You owe me about a year and a half of back child support."

"Child support? You don't even have the child yet." He laughed. "I'm starting to think you weren't even pregnant." He laughed as she giggled. His eyes passed to the little girl in the bed, her eyes drooping with sleepiness. "She's getting sleepy…" He whispered, glancing over at Adam, Meredith's eyes wandered to him as well as he lay with his eyes closed, his chest gently rising and falling as he lay asleep.

"He's not exactly bouncing off the walls…" Meredith said as she giggled, her eyes turning toward Derek as she immediately noticed the serious look on his face. Her breath caught in her throat, not expecting him to have such a pensive look about his features, and she watched him tilt his head as he watched her. "What?" She whispered. Derek shook his head without saying a word, a tender smile at his lips as his eyes spoke volumes, trying so hard to express his thoughts. "Derek?"

"I think we should talk." Derek whispered, watching her eyebrows raise in surprise.

"Is it about Emma?" She whispered, her thoughts suddenly going to her daughter's health, as they bounced suddenly back into reality as Derek shook his head.

"It is." He nodded. "It's about Emma… It's about Adam… It's about you… it's about me…" He shrugged. "It's about us." He said, watching her throat as she swallowed.

"Us?" She asked, feeling a butterfly in her stomach as she watched him nod.

"I mean… if you want to talk… if you want to, I mean… it has been a long day… and…"

"No." Meredith said as she watched his eyes. "No. You're right." She whispered as the door opened suddenly, and Ellis walked through, catching the stare in both of their eyes as their heads snapped in her direction.

"What?" She asked, knowing that something was going on, and she had interrupted. "I can go… I can come back… later if you…"

"No." Derek said with a kind smile. "No, it's okay…" He said as he glanced to Adam, and to Emma again. "Doctor Grey?" He asked softly as he watched Ellis smile. "Would you mind…keeping an eye on him for a few more minutes… I um… I was going to take Meredith for a walk." He said as Ellis gave him a sly smile, she watched him shake his head. "We're just going to go for a walk." He said softly as he watched her walk toward the bed.

"Of course." She said softly as she nodded her head, sitting quietly in the guest chair as she looked between Derek and her daughter, their eyes locked as Meredith took a quick deep breath and grabbed the wheelchair, pulling herself toward the door.

"Oh, give me a break, Mother… we're going to go talk… not run away to Vegas…" Meredith said as she felt Derek grab hold of the handles as she lifted her hands. He opened the door and started to pull her out as Ellis waved from her chair.

"I have the whole week off, kids…" She said with a smirk. "Take as much time as you need." She said, as she listened to Derek's laugh, and Meredith's giggle, as they both disappeared out the door and into the hallway.

* * *

Derek pushed Meredith's wheelchair down the hallway toward the elevators. They were quiet, but Meredith made sure to make it as comfortable of a trip as possible, reaching her hand back to rest on his as she shifted in her chair and looked up at him. "Aren't you going to ask me where I'm taking you?" He asked with a smirk as she shook her head.

"No." She said softly. "I trust you." She replied as she shifted in her chair and tipped her head back so that she could watch him. He shook his head and laughed as she stared at his chin.

"What are you doing?" He chuckled when he looked down to see her staring right up at him as he pushed the wheelchair into the elevator.

"I don't know…" She shrugged with a sad smile. "I don't know." She tipped her head back forward and stared into her hands for a moment as the elevator doors closed. He reached around and hit the lobby button and walked around the wheelchair, crouching beside it, she continued to stare at her lap.

"Meredith?" He whispered. He watched her avoid looking up at him. "Don't make me say things that I can't take back." He said softly. He waited, and was sweetly rewarded with a smirk into her lap. Her eyes lifted slowly as she gave him a curious look.

"Like what?" She asked as she tipped her head slightly, trying to hide the humor in her features.

"Oh, we'll get to that." He said tenderly as he leaned forward and kissed her nose, watching her smile become wider as she followed his eyes as he moved back around the wheelchair, her head ending up tipped back as he smiled down at her, while the elevator doors opened and he pushed her from within its confines.

She looked up and found that they had entered the lobby. She looked around, and looked back at Derek. "Where are you taking me?" She asked as he only smirked.

"Now you ask me?" He teased as she let out a giggle in response, tipping her head forward again as she shook her head. "We're going outside for some fresh air." He said softly as he turned toward the vending area. "But first… dessert." He said as he watched her smirk. "Coffee, my dear?" He asked as she laughed.

"Sure." She said as he rolled the chair to the door of the vending room. "Cream, no sugar." She replied before he had a chance to ask. He nodded his head and entered the vending room for a few moments. When he emerged, he held two cups of coffee and a packaged danish in each hand. "Oh… a real fancy dessert…" She said as he laughed, setting the danishes in her lap as he laughed.

"So… I'm a cheap date… I get it…" Derek said as he stood for a second trying to figure out how he was going to hold the coffee and push the wheelchair.

"Pick one… I'll hold the coffee, or pull the wheelchair… either one." Meredith said as Derek thought for a moment. "You can't do it all, Derek." Meredith said quickly as he gave her a sly smirk.

"Fine… you hold the coffee…" He said as he smiled. "But only because you were so polite about it." He said as she laughed, holding her hands out for the two cups, she watched carefully as he placed them within her grasp, along with several napkins on her lap, he waited for her to have a secure hold before he walked around the chair and grabbed the handles, pulling her through the nearly empty lobby toward the front doors. He walked out the front doors and pushed the wheelchair sharply to the right, following down a long sidewalk along the side of the building. There was a small sidewalk that extended to the left, and he turned and eased the chair down the slightly ramped sidewalk into the brightly lit open area to the side of the hospital, where a small memorial garden had been placed. A small green wooden bench sat surrounding a small decorative fountain that was lit up and sparkling as the water splashed within it.

"This is beautiful." Meredith whispered.

"It's a little safe haven for us doctors to go for a break or a moment alone." He replied as he pushed the brake on the wheelchair as he backed it onto the small concrete pad beside the bench. He turned and lifted the coffee cups from her hands and tilted his head as he watched her look up at him. "What?" He asked as she smiled softly.

"You took both cups." She said as he nodded.

"Yes." He replied as he turned and placed the cups on the small table beside the bench. "That's because you're coming over here with me." He said as he lifted the danishes from her lap as well and placed them on the table beside the coffee.

"Oh really?" She asked, raising her eyebrows as she smiled slyly at him, happy for him wanting to be closer, though slightly anxious at the prospect.

"Really." He said as he reached his hand out for her. "Do you want help…?" He asked as she nodded politely. "Good." He said as he turned sharply and reached for her, pulling her from the chair as she squealed, as he lifted her into his arms and held her tightly.

"Derek!" She laughed as he turned and sat down, nestling her in his arms, he pushed back in the bench and felt her relax in his lap as he glanced to her with a smirk, reaching his left hand for a cup of coffee, he handed it to Meredith, while keeping his right hand securely on her back, smiling as she leaned into his shoulder. "You're making it very hard for me to keep my distance." She replied.

"That's because I don't want you to keep your distance." He whispered as he lifted his own cup to his lips and sipped, his eyes looking directly into hers as they listened to the soft sound of the water in the fountain splashing delicately down into the pool below it. He watched as she held her cup with both hands, lifting the cup to her lips, her eyes never leaving his. "Are you alright?" He whispered.

"I'm alright." She nodded.

"Good." He said softly as he settled comfortably with her in his arms, staring into the fountain for several moments as she sipped her coffee. He could feel her eyes on his, he knew she was watching him, but he wasn't quite ready to talk just yet. He was enjoying her company and her closeness, and he didn't want to let go of that just yet. He could tell that she was inquiring about his quietness, her eyes focused on the far off look in his eyes, as he suddenly pulled her into him a little closer, careful not to spill the coffee in their hands.

"I don't think you're going to drop me." She whispered, waiting for his eyes to meet hers, she was bothered that he hadn't looked at her yet, though her worries were gone when she watched the slight smirk rise on his lips.

"I am glad that you trusted me." He said, still staring into the fountain.

"Have you ever given me a reason not to trust you, Derek?" She whispered. He didn't answer her question, fairly sure that it was a hypothetical, sitting at the tip of her tongue waiting for her to release it, and when she did, she tipped her head and rested it on his shoulder, thankful for his closeness.

"I'm sorry." He whispered.

"You're sorry?" She asked as she lifted her head and tried to look into his eyes. "Derek, look at me." She said.

"I can't." He replied.

"Why not?" She whispered.

"Because I'm afraid." He said as he lifted his hand that was supporting her, raised it to her neck, gently pulling the tendrils of hair back from her shoulder as his fingertips touched her neck, sending shivers through her body as she tried to hide them by sipping her coffee. "Are you cold?" He asked, feeling her body shudder, though he could tell that she was trying desperately to hide it from him.

"No." She whispered. "I'm comfortable." She whispered. "Derek?" She whispered.

"Hmm?" He mumbled as he turned his head, his nose burying into her hair as he felt his own shiver when the scent of her hair hit his nostrils.

"Why are you sorry?" She whispered.

"Oh…" He said with a somber chuckle. "That wasn't for you to hear…" He whispered. "That was for someone else."

With his words in her ears, she felt them begin to burn, the meaning behind them was becoming much too much for her, and she had the strongest feeling to push him away, to hide herself from him, to close herself off to his advances. Her eyes closed as she held her breath for a moment, turning her head into his shoulder as she took a slow, deep breath. Beneath the sterile smell of hospital on his clothing, she could smell his skin. It had a musky, manly smell that she had not been this close to for months. A clean, refreshing scent that made her want to breathe in even more, for fear of it disappearing in her mind, fear of becoming used to it, for then it wouldn't be nearly as exciting.

"Meredith?" He whispered, placing his coffee cup beside him on the table, he reached his hand to her face and placed it on her cheek. She could feel the warmth from his cup on his hand, its heat was evident and foreign, and she felt him lift her cup from her hands.

"I wasn't done with that…" She said as she looked up, her hand following the cup until it was out of her reach, her hand raising, and falling gently onto his neck, her hand feeling the tender, cool expanse of skin as it warmed with her touch, her hand not moving from it's spot as a wave of goosebumps rose on his skin. She thought for a moment that he had shuddered, and wasn't sure, but from the look in his eyes, she could tell that he had.

"How am I going to kiss you… if you have that cup at your lips?" He whispered.

"Um…" She whispered.

"Unless you don't want me to kiss you." He whispered. "Because… you know… I mean…" He stumbled slightly as he tried to speak. "I've… I… You… haunt me, Meredith." He whispered. "You haunt me… and I… don't understand it… because you're alive, and you're here… but still… when I close my eyes, you're still there." He whispered. "When I sleep… I think of you… when I wake up… I think of you… and… there have been times when… I feel guilty… because… you consume my thoughts like no one ever has… no one, Meredith… and I wanted to find you so many times, but I knew in my heart that you needed to grow, you needed to work through your pain in your own way, and it wouldn't be my place to find you, to haunt you back… because we hardly even know one another… and it would be unfair of me to expect you to heal in any other way than your own way." He whispered as he watched the ghostly pale look on her face as she stared into his eyes. "I want to feel bad for the way you make me feel." He said softly. "But I don't."

"Derek." She was able to choke out before her eyes filled with tears.

"Oh… Jesus… no…" he whispered as he reached over for the napkins he had set on the table. "I'm sorry… please don't cry…" he whispered as he lifted the napkin to her eyes to catch the tears as they flow down her cheeks. "I'm sorry…" He whispered as he felt her hand on his as he wiped her tears. "Please don't cry…" He whispered, feeling her skin on his hand as she pulled it away from her face, slipping her thumb into his palm as he watched her eyes.

"I'm sorry." She whispered as she stared into his eyes for a moment, watching as he opened his mouth to say something, her hand raised quickly to his lips, where her finger rested on his lips, putting a light pressure on them as she shook her head. She sniffled slightly, her eyes never leaving his. "That wasn't for you to hear." She whispered with a slight whimper to her voice. "That was meant for someone else." She whispered, feeling his lips pucker slightly against her fingertip, as it dipped just slightly between his lips, she felt his hand behind her back push her slightly in his grip as he cradled her head in his hand, leaning forward, he moved his other hand to support her, as she leaned forward and up, her eyes on his for an instant longer, as their lips met officially and consensually, sending sparks of warmth through their bodies as they reveled in one another's closeness, their lips never parting for a moment, while the night went on around them.

* * *

Her hand was against his cheek, running along the delicate stubble along his jaw line as their tongues mingled together, their lips exploring one another's mouths carefully as she finally pulled away for a breath. She could feel his hand on her back, very gently moving back and forth against her, massaging and rubbing as his other hand raised up and sweetly hooked a strand of hair around it, curling it behind her ear as he watched it unwind from his hold.

His eyes sparkled with not only a warm passionate stare, but also a soft, innocent shyness that forced her lips to the bridge of his nose, where she listened to him chuckle from her surprising move, her eyes moving to his as her forehead finally rested against his. Her eyes held a passionate fire within them, but sparkled with a small wisp of uncertainty, that he knew would probably remain there for a very long time.

"Hey…" He whispered as he watched her eyes sparkle back at him, the sound of the delicate fountain in the background the perfect symphony for the magical moment that they found themselves in. "I don't think that I've told you." He whispered. "I am very proud of you." He said as he watched her tilt her head and move her head from his for a moment as she watched his sincere expression. "For finishing school." He said as he watched her avoid his eyes for a moment. "For moving asking for help when you needed it… not taking advantage of things that weaker people would take advantage of… for raising the smartest, most beautiful little girl that I have ever met." He whispered.

"Smart?" Meredith whispered. "The little devil broke my television." She said with a slight giggle, happy that her baby was alright, so that she could make such a humorous statement.

"She's special, Meredith." Derek said as he watched her eyes glisten with unshed tears. "She's alright now, Meredith… she's okay…" He said, her lower lip protruding slightly as she watched him tilt his head to see her eyes once again.

"You saved her." She whispered. "You took such good care of her when I couldn't be there… You were like her guardian angel." She said softly.

"I love her, Meredith." Derek said as his eyes finally caught hers, as her head lifted, and she looked directly into his eyes. "What?" He asked with a slightly humored look on his face. "Aren't I allowed to love my girlfriend?" He asked as she let out a half sob, half laugh at the expression on his face, and the grin on his lips.

"Well… you are quite the player then, Doctor Shepherd… because I don't think she's going to be very happy to hear that you've been kissing another woman behind her back." Meredith raised her eyebrows at Derek as he gave her an 'I've been caught' expression.

"Well then…" He said, loosening his grip on her slightly, she felt him grip him harder against him.

"No." She whispered as she watched the humored expression on his face. "She's going to have to learn about heartbreak eventually…" Meredith said with a slight smirk on her face.

"Oh… Meredith… that's dirty dealing… and you said I was a player… you are trying to steal your daughter's boyfriend right from under her nose." He teased as she rested her head on his shoulder, tipping her head to kiss his earlobe.

"She stole you from me first." Meredith whispered.

"What?" Derek asked, turning his head to look down at her, catching only her lips in his sight as he watched her smile against him.

"Yep…" Meredith whispered. "I already told Mark that I was spoken for… she just swept in when I was asleep… snatched you up… I don't think it's fair… not fair at all." Meredith whispered, lying her head on his shoulder as she felt him cuddle her a little more. Derek remained silent for several moments, the warmth of his arms doing most of the talking for both of them as they both sit in their respective thoughts. "Why didn't you tell me that it was you on the phone?" She whispered.

"I didn't want to scare you away." He whispered. He said, knowing that she'd have something to say about that, he continued. "You were vulnerable… and you sounded so upset." He said softly. "I was more concerned with making you comfortable than anything else. Did I help you feel more comfortable?" He asked.

"Yes." She replied. "But you pretended you were Mark." She said softly. "In fact, every time he came up… you pulled for him… you said he came looking for me… you told me that he felt bad about leaving me at the park… you tell me about what a nice guy he is, yet… yet you kissed me in front of him, you were just…"

"Me?" He said with raised eyebrows. "I was just being me. I gave you the facts, Meredith. I told you that Mark is a good guy… because he is. He's decent and kind, though a bit misguided at times." Derek shrugged.

"You didn't even yell at him when he made me freak out about Emma…" Meredith reminded him.

"Oh, I yelled at him…" Derek chuckled slightly. "But it wasn't my place to embarrass him in front of you or Emma. Meredith, he asked me if I was going to pursue you… because he was interested."

"What did you tell him?" Meredith asked, watching his eyes sparkle as he smiled at her.

"I told him to wait for a better moment." Derek replied. "Like when your daughter wasn't in the hospital."

"And you feel guilty… because you whisked me away to this beautiful garden, and defied your own advice?" She asked as she giggled slightly.

"No." He shook his head. "I don't feel guilty. I needed to tell you the way I felt… feel… the way that I feel about you. I was in shock… when I saw Emma on that gurney, Meredith… and all I've been able to think about since that moment, is you." He said as she lifted her eyes to his. "All I've wanted to do since that moment… is kiss you." He said as he watched the slow sweet smile rise on her lips.

"Then kiss me." She said with a shrug, her eyes focused on his.

"I thought that's what I did." He said with a smirk as she shrugged again.

"So do it again… this time… with all of that honesty out in the open." She replied. "This time… say what you are afraid to say."

"I think that I'm falling in…" He swallowed, tears coming his eyes as he choked the next word out in barely a whisper. "Love… with you." He whispered, her head tilting slightly as the words left his lips. He waited for a soft gasp of surprise, or a shift in her eye contact, but neither happened. She just gave him the sweetest smile, her eyes smiling with her lips, and she let out the tiniest of giggles, before her lips sealed his words definitively as they kissed once again.

* * *

They rested together and sipped their coffee, stealing kisses as they rested. Derek watched her eyes drooping sleepily as he kissed her forehead. "So you were the one that sang me that lullaby?" She whispered as her eyes moved to his.

"I did." He whispered, nodding softly as he rocked her gently.

"It was sweet." She whispered.

"Well… after you sang that lullaby to Adam on the plane… he told me that I needed to learn how to hum… so that I could be his mommy and his daddy… and it was tough… but I did it." He said with a slight chuckle as Meredith giggled slightly nervously.

"I'm very proud of you." She said, looking up into his eyes as he smiled at her, resting his cheek on her head as he placed his now empty cup on the table next to them.

"I have been a mommy and a daddy for a very long time." Derek said softly, staring off into the fountain. "Sometimes it's exhausting… sometimes it's downright impossible… but it has always been rewarding. I couldn't live without that kid. I couldn't breathe without him." Derek said blankly, watching the water droplets fly through the air, jumping into one another, dancing before him as he held Meredith tightly in his arms. "I mean… it's not even… really about Anna anymore." He said with a blank stare and a shrug. "I mean… when he was born, it was all about her… and as he got older, I could see her personality shining in him. I could see her smile, her eyes, her lips… her nose… but… he's six years old now." Derek whispered. "Six years, and it's been just me and him… and every week it is almost like a little more of her slips out of him… and memories begin to fade… and he doesn't talk about her like he used to… we don't talk about her like we used to, and sometimes I get so scared that I'm letting her slip away, and at the same time… I'm happy that he's not dwelling on wanting a mother… but also… I think that he's missed so much by not having a female influence in his life. He has his aunts, and his grandmothers… but that's not the same." Derek shrugged. "That's not a mother…" He sighed as he tipped his head back. "Oh God… I must be boring you…" He said as he lifted his head and looked down at her, noticing that she had fallen asleep in his arms. "Yep…" He sighed as he shook his head. "And this is why I don't date…" He said with a laugh to himself.

He carefully pulled the cup from her fingertips, noting that it was empty, and placed it on the table beside them. With a careful movement, he pulled his arm under her legs and carefully stood up with Meredith in his arms, being sure not to hit her knee. He lifted her into the wheelchair. She moved slightly, lifting her head to see what Derek was doing, and gave him a sleepy smile. "Did I fall asleep?" She whispered as Derek just smiled and nodded.

"You did…" He said softly. "It's okay."

"You were talking to me about something… what were you saying?" She asked as he lifted the cups from the table, and tossed them into the nearby trash can. He picked up the two pastries from the table and walked toward her, crouching down in front of her.

"It wasn't anything important…" He said with a shrug. "Here… you hold onto these… and then you'll have something to snack on if you get hungry in your room." He said with a smile, watching her tilt her head. "It was nothing." He said with a chuckle. "Stop looking at me like that… let's get you back to your room before your mother really thinks that I kidnapped you and dragged you to Vegas."

"Derek…" Meredith said as she watched him walk around behind the wheelchair and push her quietly. She looked up at him. "Derek… please?"

"Please what?" He asked as he leaned his head down beside her head, while she moved her head to look out, she could feel the prickly sensation of his stubble itching at her face.

"Please tell me what you were saying." She whispered as she leaned her head on his slightly. "I want to know." She whispered.

"Well…" He said, his voice taking on a slightly playful tone as he lifted his head up. "Maybe the next time I bare my soul and propose marriage and children and a big house in the country… you'll be awake to hear it." He said as he smirked, watching her head whip around and look up at him, sending him a look that only succeeded in making him chuckle, shake his head, and smile on their way back toward the front doors of the hospital.

* * *

Derek wheeled Meredith back to her room silently, though comfortably. Their earlier conversation was still buzzing in their ears, their lips were still humming with the warmth and wetness of the other's lips on theirs. Derek reached the door and pushed backwards on it, pulling the wheelchair inside with him. He turned her around as they entered the room, and Ellis looked up from a book she was reading, pulling her glasses down a bit as she watched them enter the room.

"Well you two are looking a little bit… happier." She said with a tender smile as she watched Meredith's face redden slightly as she shook her head.

"Well, I asked her to marry me, and she refused." Derek said with a serious sigh.

"Derek!" Meredith whispered with a surprised giggle.

"She said my hair was far too perfect, and my fingernails were much too clean for her liking. She likes her men gruff and dirty with shaved heads and tattoos." Derek shrugged. "How can I compete with that?" He asked as Ellis let out a laugh. "So… I guess I'll take this sleeping sack of kid over here…" He said as he walked toward Adam, now curled into a ball on Meredith's bed. "And I'll take him home and let him down once again… daddy's too perfect to get you a mommy, kid… you're stuck." He shrugged.

"Derek…" Meredith said as she shook her head and tried not to smile.

"Too far?" He asked, watching Meredith nod her head. "Thought so…" he cringed a little as he smirked. "I should take him home though." Derek whispered as he avoided lifting the little boy into his arms for another moment. "But I do hate leaving you." He said as he watched Meredith's eyes flash to her mother. "Oh give me a break, she knows we kissed…" He shrugged. "I mean…. You're holding my danishes in your lap for goodness sake… and she knows that I always use danishes as a way to get into a woman's pants."

"And how would I know that?" Ellis asked as she watched Derek's mouth open and close for a minute as he tried to find his words, instead just letting out a humored, nervous laugh.

"Derek! My mother too?" Meredith asked, trying desperately not to laugh at the embarrassed look on Derek's face as his little joke came back to smack him. "You really are a player!" She teased. "See that, Mom… I told you… men with perfect hair… they always think they're better than everyone else." She said, playing along.

"Oh… oh, that's just cruel…" Derek shook his head. "I don't have to take this… I have to get home, shower… pretreat my hair, and tuck it in…" He said, shaking his head as he reached down for his son, lifting him effortlessly and carefully from the bed, the two women watched as the little boy molded perfectly to his father's body, moving not a muscle as he rested his head on his father's shoulder. He smiled as he glanced around the room to see if he had forgotten anything, and he cuddled the little boy closely as he smiled. "I… will see you ladies tomorrow." He said with a tender whisper, being careful not to speak too loudly as to wake the little boy.

"I'll see you tomorrow." Meredith replied.

"Doctor Grey…" Derek said as he tilted his head. "My recommendation for keeping her from running off and joining a circus… take both of her shoes and put them someplace very high… then, when she's lying on the bed, cover her with something heavy…"

"Like you, Doctor Shepherd?" Ellis teased as Derek let out a nervous laugh.

"Yes." He nodded. "Meredith." Derek said as he crouched down and looked into her eyes, her hand instantly reaching out to touch the little boy's back as his father held him securely in his arms. "Everything that I said by the fountain is true." He whispered. "I will never take a word of it back."

"Derek?" Meredith whispered as her eyes moved from the little boy's back, and looked directly into his eyes. "I think…that it's happening for me too." She whispered. "I'm just… not sure if I'm ready to use that word just yet."

"You take your time." Derek replied. "I only want to hear it when you mean it." He said, as he touched her hand with his loose hand, the other cradled the little boy carefully. He took her hand delicately in his and raised it to his lips. "You have sweet dreams… and I'll be here in the morning." She whispered.

"You promise?" She asked as he nodded and chuckled.

"It's what I get paid for…" He said as he leaned forward. "Paid with kisses." He said with a laugh, as they leaned in tenderly, and their lips met half way. "I do love you, Meredith." Derek replied as he took a step backward and looked into her eyes as he watched her smile back at him as he held his son comfortably in his arms.

"Sweet dreams, Derek." Meredith whispered, watching as Derek, raised her hand to his lips, left a tiny kiss atop it, and with a tender rub of his thumb on her cheek, and a silent goodbye to Ellis, he was out the door in an instant.

* * *

Meredith sat in a chair beside Emma's bed. The little girl was awake, and appeared to be alert. Cristina sat across from her laughing as Meredith told her the story that Meredith was trying to convey, and they were both comfortable as they looked up at the opening door of the room.

A familiar head popped through the crack in the door, and smiled. "Hey… am I interrupting anything?" He asked as he watched Meredith and Emma's face light up as he stayed in the doorway.

"Derek!" Emma said excitedly as Meredith reached for the little girl's hand, and smiled at Derek.

"Well, good morning…" Meredith said as he stayed in the doorway.

"I can't stay… but I wanted to say hi." He said with a smile as Meredith grinned back at him.

"Hi!" Emma said with a giggle.

"Hi…" Derek said as he winked. "I'll be back in a little while… interns are getting ready for rounds." He said in a soft voice as he waved toward Cristina. "It was nice to see you again, Cristina." He said as he waved and walked out of the room quickly.

Cristina furrowed her brow slightly as she turned her head, seeing that both Meredith and Emma had the brightest, cheesiest of grins on their faces as they continued to stare at the door. "Hey." Cristina said, rousing Meredith from her smirk as her eyes met her friends. "What the hell is wrong with you?" She asked as she glanced toward the door again.

"What is that supposed to mean?" Meredith asked, pretending not to know what Cristina was talking about, though she was fairly sure she had just made an ass out of herself.

"I don't think I've ever seen you stare so googly eyed after someone like that before…Wow… just wow." Cristina said with a laugh as Meredith's face began to turn red. "Look at you… now you're blushing!"

"Doctor Shepherd and I have…a history… very brief, very… different history." Meredith shrugged.

"Meredith…" Cristina said with a glower as she shook her head. "We've known one another for a very long time."

"Yes."

"We went to medical school together… you ran off and got married… ended up in Boston somehow after Rick died… and then you moved to New York City…"

"Yes." Meredith nodded.

"Never… ever… have I heard you mention a Derek, or a Doctor Shepherd." She said as she shook her head. "Are you sure that Emma was the only one that hit her head the other day?"

"Cris… I never told anyone about Derek… except my mother. She already knew him from the hospital. He used to work for her… and he helped me find my way back to my mother. He was just… he and Adam were like a Christmas miracle… and as cheesy as that sounds… it's true."

"So… you met him on Christmas?"

"I met him on my way home… in the airport… and I was trying to get back home for Christmas. Not last year… the year Ricky died… Christmas eve… He helped me, he helped Emma… He was selfless and charming. He was just… he was perfect." She shrugged.

"I can't believe you wouldn't tell me about that…" Cristina said with a humored expression.

"That's only part of the story…" Meredith said with a smirk, as she watched Cristina's eyebrows raise with curiosity.

"There's more?" Cristina asked as she watched her friend's face blush again as she giggled.

"Oh, there's a lot more." Meredith nodded, as she glanced to the little sleepy girl in the bed, and then back to the door as it began to open once again.

Derek stepped into the room, glancing back into the hallway as he closed it behind him. He walked in with almost a skip in his step as he looked around and watched Meredith's eyebrows raised. "Where's the big cheese?" He asked, referring to Ellis, obviously as Meredith smirked.

"She went to get a change of clothes for me… and to take a shower… what are you doing strutting into the room like you have nothing better to do, don't you have a job?" She asked as he smirked and passed her to walk toward Emma's bed.

"I do have a job…" Derek said with raised eyebrows as he stepped to Emma's bedside and flipped open her chart as he scanned her vitals from through the night. "And I'm doing it right now." He said as he watched Emma look up at him. "You're quiet today." He said as he watched her smile at him.

"Mommy and Aunt Crissy were talking about you." She said with a smirk as her eyes moved to her mother, whose cheeks turned red. Cristina let out a laugh as she watched Derek smirk, and Meredith cower in embarrassment.

"They were talking about me?" Derek asked as he watched Meredith let her head rest in her hand.

"Yep." Emma said as she nodded slightly as Derek put the flashlight in her eyes, checked her bandages.

"Well, did you tell them that I'm off the market?" Derek asked as Emma gave him a confused look. "Did you tell them that you were my girlfriend?" Derek asked as she giggled.

"Hey, he's my boyfriend!" Emma exclaimed as Meredith looked up and glanced to Derek who had a smirk on his face as Emma smiled brightly.

"So what were they saying?" Derek asked as he continued his exam, listening to the little girl as she started to talk animatedly about what Cristina and Meredith had been saying. The more Emma talked, the more Derek smirked, and the more Meredith shook her head and laughed, her cheeks turning bright red as the little girl tattled on her mother. "Well, I think then… that I should have a private talk with mommy…" He said as Emma nodded.

"You should spank her, Derek." Emma said, as suddenly Meredith began coughing, Cristina's laugh rang out loud at her friend's reaction, and Derek grinned a Cheshire grin.

"I should spank her, huh?"

"Yeah…" Emma nodded innocently. "Give her a tap on her butt for being such a bad girl…" Emma said seriously as Derek tried so very hard to remain serious through the conversation as Meredith continued to cough and sputter. "Are you alright, Mommy?" Emma asked.

"Yeah, Mommy… how ya doing over there?" Derek asked as he winked at Meredith, which sent Cristina into even more laughter.

"I'm fine…" Meredith said as she finally caught her breath, her hand now over her mouth as her face stayed a bright shade of red.

"I'm going to go talk to mommy now, okay?" He said as he leaned down and kissed the little girl's forehead as she nodded her head. He turned and faced Cristina and Meredith as he smirked. He stepped over to Meredith and she held her hand out for him as he lifted her to a standing position. "Got it?" He asked as she nodded.

"Got it." She said as she started to walk slightly.

"We'll be right back…" Derek said as his eyes flashed to Cristina, who nodded and let out a slight laugh as Derek moved behind Meredith to support her as she walked, whispering into her ear as she giggled.

"Spank her really hard, Derek!" Emma exclaimed, giggling as she watched him turn and raise his eyebrows as he led Meredith out of the room.

"Don't you worry about it, kid… I'll take care of her…" He winked over at Emma, who let out a giggle as Derek turned and walked out of the room with Meredith.

Once out of the room, Derek looked down the hallway to see if it was clear, and just as Meredith started to turn around and ask him what he was doing, his lips were on hers. He pulled her into him hard, gripping her tightly so she wouldn't lose her footing, and she pulled herself just as tightly into him. He smiled against her mouth as she groaned against his, a slight giggle echoing up her throat as he finally pulled from her mouth, breathless and smiling. "I am… I'm sorry…" He whispered as he shook his head. "I'm sorry… I just… I lost my train of thought… and I needed to do that."

Meredith licked her lips and looked into his eyes, a shy expression on her features as she shook her head and gripped his arms tightly to keep herself from falling. "No…" She shook her head. "Don't be sorry… please don't be sorry…" She said with a smile. "That was…"

"I've wanted to do that since I left your room last night." He whispered as he pulled her into a hug, kissing her head. "I just… you do something to me." He whispered into her hair as she smiled.

"And with the girlfriend in there… you had to pull me out into the hallway?" She asked, listening to him chuckle as she pulled slightly from his arms and looked into his eyes as he laughed.

"She's very strict…" Derek said softly. "And besides… I like sneaking around." He said with a slight laugh that made her giggle. "Actually…" He said, watching her eyes. "The interns are doing rounds in Neuro today. I wanted to know if you minded if we stopped into Emma's room."

"I wouldn't mind seeing you in action." She said with a smile, watching the happiness in his eyes glimmer as he held her.

"Good." He whispered as he leaned down and kissed her lips again. "Thank you." He said as she smiled at him and continued to hold him.

"You should probably go?" She asked, watching him glance down the hallway.

"Yeah." He replied. "I don't want to though. I want to talk to you…"

"You took next week off, Derek… I have a very good feeling that we're going to be talking then."

"Right." He nodded. "I'll let you get back to your company… I'll see you soon."

"See you soon." She said as she took the doorknob and turned to lean her back against it.

"Can you get in there alright? You're not going to fall like a tree or something?" he asked as she laughed.

"I'm not going to fall like a tree… no." She laughed as she leaned forward for another kiss. "I'll see you soon."

"See you soon." He whispered as he watched her keep her eyes on his until she closed the door behind her. He found that he had the biggest smirk on his face, and that made him grin all the more. He shook his head and laughed, as he happily made his way down the hallway for rounds.

* * *

Meredith explained to Emma that Derek would be coming back in a few minutes, and that he was going to be bringing some 'helper' doctors in to help him. She didn't want her to be nervous, for she knew the procedure and knew that several strangers in the same room all talking about her was not something she was used to. Cristina threw in a few quips to make the little girl laugh, as Meredith blushed at any insinuation of Derek being anything other than a friend, even though her friend knew very well the reason they had left the room for a moment.

"I can't believe you never told me." Cristina said as she nudged her friend.

"There wasn't anything to tell." Meredith shrugged. "I mean… there's something to tell now… but.. I mean…"

"Meredith, we will be talking about it… but there are little ears that are able to hear every tiny little thing uttered in this room." She said softly.

"She means me." Emma said with a grin as her eyes sparkled.

"Yes, she means you…" Meredith said as she watched the little girl giggle and smile, straightening herself slightly as the door to the room opened. Derek walked into the room and smiled a professional smile across at the three women, and glanced to the door as six doctors followed him in.

Meredith sat up slightly as she watched Derek usher them all in, holding the door open. "Alright." Derek said as he nodded toward the bed. "Who would like to present?" He asked as the three girls raised their hands enthusiastically, their eyes on Derek as they waved them, one giggled, and Cristina turned her head to look at Meredith, who raised her eyebrows at the obvious display by these two doctors.

Derek chose one of the doctors and she stood forward and looked down at Emma on the bed. "Six year old trauma patient, brought in with…" She continued her presentation, her eyes never leaving Derek as she smirked and gave her colleagues a knowing smirk. Derek's eyes, however were on Meredith, who was watching him closely, and Cristina was watching the unspoken conversation between the two of them as Emma watched Derek stare at her mother.

The doctors were obviously taken with their handsome attending, and the girls were showing that it was blatantly obvious. Derek's attention was brought back to the intern who had stated the case and she watched Derek for some kind of affirmation that she was correct.

"Good work, Doctor Hall… but next time, make sure that when you address the patient, you look at her, not me… I already know the case, but you have to keep your eyes on the patient, so they won't feel like you're ignoring them. "Since she's a neuro patient, it's always good to ask questions… if she's in pain, or just simple questions to make sure she's responding correctly. "Emma?"

"Doctor Shepherd." Emma said, her voice a little grumpy as she looked up into his eyes.

"Doctor Shepherd?" Derek asked as he pulled his light from his pocket.

"Yes." She said with a huff as Derek looked close into her eyes and handed the light off to Doctor Hall. He began to explain what to look for, and Emma looked absolutely grumpy sitting there waiting for them to finish.

"Well, what's that all about?" He asked as she turned her head. "Well, it looks like our patient is feeling a little shy, maybe we should move on to another room… we don't want her to feel uncomfortable. Oh… while I'm here…" He said as his eyes fell on Meredith. He watched as she shook her head slightly and he shrugged, watching her shrug back, giving him permission to continue. "Our patient's mother…Meredith… is well… she's one of you… she was to be in your intern class, and will be starting here in two weeks… " Derek said as he watched the doctor's nod and smile at Meredith as she shook her head and watched Derek's smirk as his eyes remained on hers. The interns tried to get his attention, and it took a second, but he pulled his attention away from Meredith. "Alright…" He said as he turned toward the door. "We'll go to Mr. Barry's room next…" He said as he shuffled them from the room, his eyes flashing back to Meredith as she smiled and shook her head, watching him disappear out the room.

As the door clicked, Cristina turned and glanced to Meredith, who was still watching the door, a slight smirk on her lips. "Oh God…" Cristina whispered as Meredith's head moved to look at her friend.

"What?"

"I think I'm going to need something for my stomach… There is way too much sugar in this room." She said as she made a puking noise that made Meredith rolled her eyes.

"Oh my God… who is the six year old in the room?" She asked with a laugh as she turned to see Emma sitting in her bed, her arms crossed over her chest as she glared at the door. "Uh oh…" Meredith mumbled.

"What?" Cristina asked as she turned to see Emma's grumpy look. "Uh oh…"

"Trouble in paradise?" Meredith asked.

"What the heck was that?" Emma asked as she turned her head to look at her mother.

"What was what?" Meredith asked, trying not to look amused at the look on her daughter's face.

"I don't want to be Derek's girlfriend anymore." She mumbled.

"Girlfriend?" Cristina laughed.

"Oh no… why not?" Meredith asked, feeling bad that Emma was feeling left out of the whole conversation, she watched the little girl pout.

"He didn't even call me Emma bear, or princess… he just was a doctor and that's all… He doesn't want to be my boyfriend… boyfriends don't make their girlfriends feel sad."

"Oh yes they do." Cristina replied as Meredith laughed and smacked her friend.

"So you don't want Derek to be your boyfriend anymore?" Meredith asked.

"Nope." Emma shook her head.

"Aww…" Meredith said softly.

"Meredith!" Cristina exclaimed, seeing what her friend was doing, she laughed as Meredith shooed her away.

"It's okay, baby… he doesn't deserve you…" Meredith said as she watched Emma pout.

"No… no he doesn't… he's such a bad boy… he hardly even said hi to me… and he brought the doctors in and they poked me… did you see him let them poke me?" She said with a pout.

"Yes… such a bad, bad boy…" Meredith said as she shook her head, continuing to shoo Cristina from her side. "How are you going to break it to him, baby?"

"I'm just gonna come out and say it… Doctor Shepherd, you can't be my boyfriend… you broke my heart… you don't deserve me." She said with a sad pout, trying so hard to be brave as Meredith listened to her little girl's sadness.

"I think that's a great idea."

"Then we can't talk to him anymore." Emma said as she turned her head to look into her mother's eyes. Meredith was surprised by her daughter's exclamation.

"What?" She asked, sending Cristina into a bout of laughter.

"No. He broke my heart, you can't talk to him anymore, and I can't talk to him anymore." She shrugged.

"But… we… I…"

"I want another doctor." Emma said as she rolled onto her side facing away from her mother, as Cristina laughed, her head back as she let out a full laugh, she pulled her head back and looked into Meredith's eyes.

"Haha… did you hear that?" She asked as Meredith giggled.

"What?" Meredith asked.

"That's the sound of someone's plan backfiring!" She exclaimed with a laugh as she and Meredith continued to giggle, and Emma sighed as she faced the wall, having no idea what had gotten into the two adults in the room.

* * *

It was just about lunch time when Derek walked back toward Emma's hospital room. He was excited to see the little girl, excited to get to see her mother. He stepped into the room and saw that she was sitting up in her bed, looking over at her grandmother as she giggled. "Well look at that… the little monkey is sitting up." He said with a smile, not expecting the reaction that he would get.

"Go away!" She squeaked, her smile turned to a pout as she pointed toward the door. Meredith and Ellis turned their heads to see the surprised man standing in the doorway.

"Go away?" he asked innocently, tilting his head as he watched her nod her head.

"Yes, yes! Mommy! I said I wanted another doctor! Tell Doctor Shepherd to leave!" She exclaimed.

Derek's smile disappeared, and his brow furrowed as the little girl gave him a grumpy pout. "You want me to go away?" Derek asked. "If I go away, I won't come back…" he said as he watched Meredith smirk a little, expecting her to take it back, apologize before he closed the door.

"Good! Go away!" She shouted as Derek took a step backwards. "Mommy said she doesn't want to talk to you neither! No more Doctor Shepherd… you're bad! You're a bad man!"

"Emma, that's enough." Meredith said sternly as Emma started to breath heavily, tears coming to her eyes.

"No… he broke my heart… make him go away…" She said as she started to cry.

Meredith looked up at Derek, who tilted his head in confusion, and Ellis stood up and walked toward the door. She grabbed Derek's coat sleeve. "She's having a bad day…" Ellis whispered, as Meredith tried to calm the little girl in the bed, as she cried into her arms.

"Is she in pain? Is it from the surgery? Is this normal behavior…?" Derek began to ask as he watched Ellis tilt her head.

"She's a diva, Derek… she's fine…she is just having a bad day. If we need you, we'll call…" Ellis whispered.

"She's crying, Ellis…" He said softly. "Why is she so angry with me? What did I do?"

"Derek… just go on… its fine… finish your shift… I'll talk to you about it later." She said softly as Derek watched Meredith glance to him as Emma gripped her tightly. She looked sorry, she looked stressed, she looked concerned. He gave her a hopeful smile that seemed to lighten her eyes a little, and he looked into Ellis' eyes.

"Tell Meredith that I want to kiss her… and I'll be back later." Derek whispered as he glanced to Meredith with a boyish grin, his eyes holding a certain mischief as Meredith watched him smile a little more and slip out of the door, as Ellis closed it behind him.

She turned around and leaned against the door. She looked at her sobbing granddaughter and shook her head. "Alright, that's enough…" She declared, watching her granddaughter stop clawing at her mother as Meredith pulled her daughter's hands from around her.

"Is he gone?" She sniffled as she watched Ellis nod her head.

"He's gone…" Ellis sighed. "He's gone, and I hope you're happy." She shook her head.

"G-ma…" She sniffled, watching Ellis shake her head.

"No… no… no G-ma… you were very mean to Doctor Shepherd, and it made your G-ma very disappointed in you." She said as Emma sniffled, wiping her eye with her hand as she glanced to Meredith who raised her eyebrows at her daughter to show that she didn't approve either. Emma's eyes shifted to Ellis. "I think you really need to sit back and think about other people's feelings. I understand that he hurt yours, but you can't just go around hurting his back. He helped you when you were hurt, and this is how you repay him? By telling him to leave, and never come back?"

"I'm sorry…" Emma whimpered.

"Well, I don't think you should be talking to us about that, I think you should be telling Doctor Shepherd that… what do you think?" Meredith asked as Emma watched her mother and grandmother as her face became grumpy again, and she pouted into her lap.

"I'm…sorry…" She whimpered again, feeling her mother lean forward and kiss her forehead softly as she started to stand up. "Where are you going, mama?" She whimpered as Meredith tilted her head.

"Just to the other bed… mommy is tired…"

"Don't go far…" Emma whimpered as she glanced to Ellis, who stood up and glanced to Meredith. "G-ma…?"

"I'm going to go for a walk." She said softly as she watched her granddaughter as she watched her with a concerned face. "I promise I won't leave the hospital… geez… can't a gramma get a break?" She asked as Emma sighed, watching as her grandmother walked to her mother's bed. She kissed Meredith's brow and helped her cover with the blanket as she whispered something to her that made her mother smile. Her eyes sparkled for a moment, as they flashed over to her.

"I love you, Mama." She whispered as she watched Meredith smile.

"I love you, princess… you get some rest." She said softly as Emma nodded, turning her head and closing her eyes as she listened to her grandmother quietly leave the room.

* * *

It was about five o'clock when the door opened again and a young male doctor came into the room. He glanced to the bed where Meredith lay awake, her eyes staring off into space, her attention then drawn to the young doctor as he lifted Emma's chart.

"Who are you?" The little girl asked curiously, her eyes moving to Meredith, who sat up slowly. She hadn't been sleeping for hours, just lying there watching Emma breathe as she napped, and now she waited for the doctor's response.

"I'm Doctor Gandy." He said with a smile as he looked over Emma's chart. "And you're…"

"I'm Emma." She said as she furrowed her brow. "Where's Derek?"

"I'm sorry… Derek?"

"Doctor Shepherd." Emma said as she looked to her mother for a moment and then back to the doctor. "Where's Derek?" She asked, her voice was seemingly panicked. She watched the doctor reach over to shine the light in her eyes, when Ellis walked through the door. "G-ma! Tell this doctor to get away from me and get Derek… I want Derek… please? Please, G-ma… Please?" She started to panic as the doctor invaded her personal space while performing the exam, a standard procedure, but the little girl was not happy.

"Doctor Shepherd had another case, he asked for me to stop in to take a look at you, see if you are ready to get up and take a little walk… get you on your feet again, so you're not stuck in bed." Doctor Gandy said with a smile.

"No! I don't want to get up and walk around… I want Derek, and I want him now!" She exclaimed.

"Emma, stop being stubborn, you're making mommy upset." Meredith said with a sigh as Emma turned her head to see her mother shaking her head, she dropped her eyes and sighed, giving in to the exam as Meredith watched the doctor for a moment and slid from the bed, standing against it, Ellis walked over to her and started to talk to her.

Emma watched her mother and grandmother talking, and the doctor then turned around and began a conversation. Their voices were hushed, and no one seemed rushed or upset, sad or concerned. Emma listened, and when she heard the two words that she dreaded, hated, two words that she felt should never go together. Car. Accident. She didn't need to hear anything more. "No! No!" She exclaimed as the three adults turned to face her. "NO! DEREK! Where is Derek! Tell me Derek is okay! No… no…" She said as she started to move the blanket aside, as if she were going to jump from the bed. "Derek! Derek! No! Mama! Derek can't go to heaven! He can't go to heaven!" She exclaimed as Meredith grabbed her before she leapt from the bed, holding her tightly to her body, she had no idea where her daughter would get such a crazy idea. She had no idea hw much her words had affected the little girl. "I need Derek! Please! Please!" She panicked angrily.

The door opened and Derek stepped inside immediately, his stride long and purposeful as Emma's eyes lit up at the sight of him. He slid onto the edge of her bed and gathered her into his arms as he began to rock her, holding her as she sobbed. "I'm right here… I'm right here… It's okay, baby… it's okay… he whispered, having no clue the two tiny words that had sent the little girl into such a panic. At this point it didn't matter, the only thing that mattered now was the little girl's peace and happiness, and from the way that she was holding onto him, she was going to be attached for a long time.

"Don't go again, Derek… don't go again…" the little girl cried against his scrub shirt as he rocked her in his arms, his lips kissing the top of her head as he whispered to her. He was on his way to visit, when he heard the little girl crying. He looked up at Doctor Gandy, Meredith and Ellis.

"What happened?" He asked as he held the little girl to him tightly, protectively as Meredith touched her hair as she looked to Derek.

"I think she thought something happened to you…" Meredith said, her voice was showing her confusion of her daughter's behavior and she sat against the edge of the bed as Emma continued to sniffle into Derek. "Baby…?" She whispered as Emma looked up at her mother and sniffled. "What is all the shouting about?"

"That Doctor said Derek was in a car accident." She sniffled. "He said he went to heaven."

"Doctor Gandy didn't say that, baby… he said that Derek was helping people that were in a car accident… he was helping them… oh, sweetheart…" Meredith said as he held her arms out for the little girl, who crawled into them securely, sniffling and whimpering as she held her hand out for Derek. Derek gripped her hand and looked into Meredith's eyes as she apologized for Emma's earlier behavior.

"Chris." Derek said as he looked up at the younger doctor. "Thank you for checking in on her… The accident they paged me for wasn't as bad as initially reported… you can head down to trauma… I got this here." He said with a polite smile as Dr. Gandy nodded. He said goodbye to Ellis, Meredith, and Emma and made his way from the room. Derek watched the little girl cling to her mother tightly, and rubbed her back gently as Meredith gave him a grateful smile.

"I'm really sorry." Meredith whispered as Derek tilted his head and gave her a smirk.

"There is no need for apologies…"

"You don't even know why she was mad at you." Meredith said, glancing to Ellis, who was hiding a smirk on her lips as Derek glanced to her for a moment, and then back to Meredith.

"Does there really have to be a reason?" Derek asked. "She's six… Adam got mad at me the other day because I forgot to put the cap on the milk container. He didn't talk to me for most of the day. Kids are peculiar… and Emma is not an exception to that rule." He said as Emma glanced to him. "Though I would be lying if I told you that it didn't hurt my feelings." He shrugged, watching Emma release her hands from her mother's shirt. She rolled onto her back and pouted a little as she glanced to Derek as she sniffled.

"I'm sorry that I yelled at you, Derek." She said softly. "You hurted my feelings when you came in here and didn't give me a kiss, or call me Emma bear… I was mean, and I'm sorry." She sniffled.

"I understand, little girl…" he whispered. "I'll try to be a little more aware of that when I'm in here, how is that? But you can't be mad at me because of it… just remind me… and I'll be sure to let everyone know how special you are." Derek said as he watched the smile begin to appear on the little girl's lips.

"Derek… I don't know if we can be boyfriend and girlfriend no more…" She sniffled and shrugged.

"Oh no… really?" Derek asked as the little girl climbed across the bed to him and crawled into his lap. She looked up into his eyes and watched the hurt filled expression in his eyes.

"No…" She sighed.

"Well… I do have a confession to make." He said, his voice going low as he looked to the floor. He swore he heard Meredith giggle slightly at his display and his eyes flashed to her to see the smirk on her lips. He tried desperately to hide his own smile with a sincere sigh.

"What, Derek?" She whispered.

"I kissed another girl while I was going out with you." He said as she gasped in surprise.

"Oh no!" She exclaimed. "You did?"

"I did." He admitted. "And I'm so sorry…" He shook his head. "She was just very pretty… and she really seemed to like me… so I kissed her… this isn't how I wanted you to find out." He said in a dramatic tone as he covered his face with his hand, mostly to hide the smile on his face as the look on the little girl's face turned solemn and strong, looking directly into his eyes, she tilted her head and put her hand on his shoulder.

"It's okay, Derek." She said with a sigh. "Do I know who this little girl is?" She asked sincerely, her eyes going to her mother and grandmother who were watching intently.

"I think you do." Derek nodded.

"Can I have a name, please?" She asked, looking down, shaking her head.

"Are you sure?" Derek asked.

"I'm a grown up kid, Derek… I can handle it… Who is this little girl you have been kissing?" She asked as she shook her head.

"Her name is… Meredith." He said, his eyes lifting to Meredith's as they waited for the fall out. He looked back to the little girl as she continued to stare into her lap silently. "Emma?" He whispered.

"Her name is Meredith?" Emma whispered into her lap.

"Yes." Derek said softly with an exaggerated sigh. "Meredith." He shook his head.

Emma's eyes very slowly lifted to Derek's, the tilt in her head was just slight as she narrowed her eyes at him. "Meredith?" She said again, watching Derek nod slowly. "That's Mommy's name." She said as she watched Derek's eyes flash to Meredith and back to her. Suddenly her eyes widened. "OH MY GOSH! YOU KISSED MOMMY?" She exclaimed as she pushed herself from his lap, nearly tumbling onto the bed as Derek watched her reaction carefully. He couldn't tell if it was shock, surprise, happiness, anger. She was a very hard read, and when she turned to her mother, she shook her head. "Mommy, you kissed my boyfriend!" She exclaimed.

"You technically stole him from me." Meredith shrugged.

"Haha!" Emma exclaimed with a giggle. "Here I am all worried cuz my boyfriend kissed another girl, and it was just my mommy!" She exclaimed. "Haha!"

"So you're not mad?" Derek asked, glancing to Meredith, as Emma giggled.

"Of course not, Derek. I kiss mommy too." She shrugged. "It's okay…" She grinned and shook her head. "Wow… that was a close one!" She exclaimed.

"Yep…" Derek said with a laugh. "It sure was…"

"Kissing mommy…" She shook her head as she patted Derek's shoulder. "You're a laugh riot!" She exclaimed.

"A laugh riot?" Derek asked.

"That's what G-ma says…" She shrugged.

Derek looked at Ellis, who shook her head. "Don't ask." She said.

"Emma…" Derek said softly as he watched the little girl get settled in her bed again, she watched Derek very carefully.

"Would you mind… if someday… I ask your mommy to be my girlfriend?" He asked as he watched Emma glance between the two of them as their eyes met over her bed, a slight smile on their lips as they paused, Derek then looking down at the little girl.

"You can be mommy's boyfriend, Derek." She said as she smiled. "So long as I'm your Emma bear."

"You're always going to be my Emma bear…" he said as he leaned down and kissed her head softly, his eyes not leaving Meredith's, as she turned her head into his embrace, and hugged him tightly.

Derek had said a quick set of goodbyes before he headed over to his sister's house to pick up Adam. He got Adam in the car and sat for a moment with the car running before they pulled out of the driveway. "How was your day?" Derek asked his son as he glanced in the back seat as his son buckled himself in.

"Stressful." He replied, his answer sounding like something that his father would have said to him if the little boy had asked him the same question.

"Stressful? You're six years old… how stressful can your day be? Did you have to do brain surgery? No… I did brain surgery, and you're stressed out…" Derek went on.

"Um… no need to be snippy, Daddy." Adam replied.

"Snippy…" Derek grumbled a little under his breath with a smirk as he looked to his son in the rearview mirror.

"Are we going to go see Emma and Meredith?" He asked curiously as Derek raised his eyebrows in curiosity.

"You want to go see them?" Derek asked.

"Yes." Adam replied. "I thought about them today." He said as he glanced out the window, avoiding eye contact with Derek for a moment. "I'm hungry."

"Do you want dinner first?" he asked, watching Adam sitting in the back seat, the little boy looked up at his father's reflection in the rear view mirror.

"Um… I dunno." Adam shrugged, watching Derek's eyes in the rear view mirror, he watched Derek nod and start to drive.

Derek drove, periodically looking into the back seat at his son. Adam appeared thought filled, his eyes out the window as they passed the houses and trees along the street. He remained relatively quiet the entire trip. "Hey." Derek asked, watching Adam's eyes lift to his view. "Are you alright?" He asked, watching Adam nod. "What's on your mind?"

"Nothing." Adam shrugged.

"Are you sure?" Derek asked, watching Adam turn his head and look at Derek through the mirror.

"Uh huh…" He nodded.

"You look upset."

"Nope." Adam shrugged as he looked back out the window.

"Do you want to talk about something?" Derek asked.

"Nope." Adam replied.

Derek pulled into the hospital parking lot, he drove toward one of the parking spaces and pulled in, putting it into park, he glanced back at Adam who was still staring out the window blankly. "Adam?" Derek said, watching his eyes flash to his father, his head turn as he raised his eyebrows, as if he had been pulled from a deep thought and was unsure if Derek had called him before. "Come up here in the front seat for a second."

"Aren't we going in?" He asked.

"Yeah… but come here for a second… talk to daddy." Derek said softly as he watched Adam unbuckle his seatbelt, the little boy shifted and wiggled his way over the center console into the passenger seat. He knelt down in the seat and faced his father, tipping back to lean against the door as he watched Derek glance to him as he pulled his seatbelt off.

"What'd you want?" Adam asked as he sighed, a smile not on his lips, his eyes imploring his father's face as he noted the concern in it.

"I just wanted to talk to you about a couple of things…"

"Like what?" Adam asked.

"Well… like… Meredith." Derek shrugged. He watched as Adam's eyebrows rose and a smile played at the corner of his lips.

"Like what about Meredith?"

"Well… daddy has had a girlfriend now and then… you remember Miss Addison… right?"

"Yeah." Adam shrugged.

"And Miss Rose, you remember her."

"Ick." Adam replied.

"Hey… she was nice…"

"She was weird, Daddy." Adam said with a shrug.

"Well… regardless…" Derek said with a sigh. "How did you feel when daddy had a girlfriend?"

"I don't know." Adam replied.

"You're not helping here…" Derek sighed.

"I don't know what you want, Daddy." Adam said honestly.

"I don't know what I want either." Derek sighed.

"Daddy, you're confusing me." Adam replied.

"I'm confused too." Derek sighed.

"About what, Daddy?" Adam asked. "Is this about Meredith?" He asked, watching Derek's eyes meet his as he tilted his head. "You want Meredith to be your girlfriend?"

"Kind of." Derek shrugged.

"Okay."

"But this is different." Derek said softly.

"How is it different?" Adam asked.

"Well… those other ladies were nice… and they were pretty and they made me smile… and there wasn't anything wrong with them… I mean… I don't know…"

"And Meredith?"

"She makes my tummy do flips…" Derek replied.

"Flips?"

"Yeah… you know that feeling that you get in your tummy when you are upside down on the monkey bars for too long?" Derek asked, watching Adam nod. "She makes me feel like that." Derek said watching Adam listen curiously. "She makes my throat all dry… and she makes my heart go really fast, like I just ran a whole lot… and ate a whole bunch of sugar…"

"Those other ladies didn't do that?" Adam asked.

"Nope…" Derek replied. "Only one other person in my whole life has ever made me feel like that." Derek replied.

"Who is that?" Adam asked, tilting his head as he watched Derek give him a smile.

"You know who…" Derek said with a laugh.

"Mommy?" Adam asked.

"Yep." He nodded, taking a slow, deep breath.

"So you like Meredith like you liked Mommy?" Adam asked.

"Yes." Derek nodded.

Adam watched his father for a second, waiting for him to say more. He gave Derek a confused look as he shook his head. "Then what's the problem?" He asked honestly.

"What's the problem?" Derek replied.

"Yeah…" Adam said with another shrug. "If you like Meredith like you like Mommy… then she's gotta be a good pick… mommy was a good pick."

"You like her?" Derek asked Adam, who nodded and grinned. "So you think I should ask her to be my girlfriend?"

"No." Adam said. "You should ask her to be more than your girlfriend. You should ask her to be my mommy." Adam said with a giggle as Derek shook his head.

"Why don't we take this one step at a time… Rome wasn't built in a day…"

"Huh?"

"Good things come to those who wait."

"Daddy…" Adam shook his head. "Just stop with the silly sayings, and get on with this…" Adam shrugged. "I'm hungry."

"Yeah, yeah…" Derek said as he shook his head and leaned in to kiss his son's head, he nodded toward the door.

"Let's go get some food… We can have dinner with Meredith and Emma." He said as Adam smiled.

"You mean your girlfriend." Adam chimed in as Derek laughed and rolled his eyes.

"Yeah, my girlfriend…" Derek laughed as they exited the car and made their way toward the hospital together.

* * *

Derek held Adam's hand as they walked into the hospital, and Adam appeared to be in a good mood now, despite his earlier worrisome expression. They walked together through the lobby of the hospital and Adam smiled and waved at the nurse behind the counter as she called him by his name. He smiled up at his father as they pushed the elevator button and waited patiently. The door opened, and who was to step out, but Mark Sloan.

"Hey…" Mark said with a smile, as he looked down at Adam, who grinned and held out his fist for a knuckle rap from Mark.

"Hey, M-dawg!" Adam said, glancing to Derek, whose eyebrows were raised. "I mean Mark." He said politely, smirking a little as he glanced to Derek and back to Mark again.

"Hey wingman… what's up?"

"Daddy and me are going to see Meredith and Emma." Adam replied as Mark looked at Derek with raised eyebrows.

"For someone who isn't making a move, you seem awfully close to the lady." Mark remarked to Derek, who opened his mouth to reply.

"Actually…" Derek started as Adam interrupted.

"Daddy is going up to ask Meredith to be his girlfriend." Adam said with a smirk.

"Adam." Derek said quietly.

"Oh, he is, is he?" Mark asked with a smirk as he looked at Derek with a slightly resentful glance.

"Yep! He asked me if he could ask her to be his girlfriend… he said that she makes him feel all dizzy inside his tummy…" Adam said with a shrug. "If a girl made me sick, I'd want to stay away from her." Adam shrugged again.

"She gives you a tummy ache, huh?" Mark mocked.

"Mark… shut up." Derek replied.

"Daddy, that's not nice." Adam replied.

"Yeah, Daddy… that's not nice." Mark mocked, making Adam laugh.

"Mark, that's enough." Derek replied as he sighed and rolled his eyes.

"You're a really crappy friend, Derek." Mark said with an irritated growl. "A really crappy friend."

"Why? Because I followed my heart? Well, if that makes me a crappy friend, then I'm sorry that I'm such a crappy friend to you… but I needed a friend, and she was there… Where the hell were you when I moved out to Seattle? You got pissy then too… you refused to even come and see us until we moved back to the east coast… I invited you out to see our place… to see the beautiful land that I bought out there… and where were you? Where were you, Mark? You sat on your ass in New York until I bent myself so far backwards that I had to come back… I had to come back because I was so absolutely miserable because I didn't even have you… my supposed best friend… to support me." Derek growled. "I met Meredith at a time in my life when I didn't even know what the hell I was doing… I had a good job… I have a wonderful son, and a lot of shitty, shitty friends." He grumbled. "She let me take care of her, Mark… and I fell in love with her… so just… fuck you, Mark. Fuck you." Derek said as he grabbed Adam's hand and pulled him with him as he stepped into the elevator and slammed his hand on the button, Mark stood in the hallway watching Derek wipe his face with his hand as Adam stared up at his father in shock.

"Oh my goodness, Daddy." Adam whispered.

"What?" Derek growled, looking down into his son's eyes, he could see a tinge of fear in his eyes, and instantly all of his anger was replaced with guilt, as he lifted his son into his arms. "Oh God… I'm sorry… I'm sorry, buddy… I'm sorry…" He whispered as he looked at Adam closely, almost as if he were looking for some physical scar that could have resulted from his verbal spat with Mark.

"I'm okay…" Adam said as he rubbed his eye. "I'm okay, Daddy… I'm okay…" He said as he brushed his father off him and wiggled to the floor, he let out a sigh. "Let's just go see Meredith now." He said as the doors opened, and he walked out of the elevator in front of Derek, down the hallway toward Meredith's room, without looking behind him once.

Derek walked behind him, catching up as he looked toward Derek and reached for the door handle. Derek nodded, and they entered the room slowly. Adam pushed himself into the room and grinned when he saw Meredith. "Meredith!" He said happily as he ran across the room and pushed his arms around her as he embraced her. She leaned to the side and kissed his forehead, running her fingertips through his hair.

"Hey, baby… how are you?" Meredith asked as the little boy leaned up for a kiss on the cheek.

"Okay…" he said, glancing to Emma. "Hey Emma."

"Hi Adam." Emma said as she smiled at Derek, waving. "Hi Derek…"

"Hey sweetheart." Derek said as he walked toward the bed, he reached for the chart.

"Hey." Ellis said from her seat beside Meredith. "No chart… this isn't a doctor visit."

" I just wanted to see if…"

"And the doctor on call can take care of it… put the chart down… and sit down. This is a social visit, not a doctor visit." She said with her eyebrows raised, Derek didn't know what to do. He just stared at her blankly for a moment.

"I think she means business." Meredith replied as she pulled Adam into her lap, she watched the wrinkles in Derek's forehead, the worry in his eyes. "What's wrong?"

"Nothing." Derek replied. "It's nothing."

"Mark yelled at daddy again…" Adam said with a sigh.

"Adam, do you know when to keep quiet?" Derek asked.

"Nope." Adam shrugged. "Then daddy said the 'f' word and yelled at Mark… said he loved you, and that he wants to be your girlfriend, but he said that he didn't ask you yet. He wanted to know if I minded, and I said no. I said that you can be his girlfriend because he said you make his tummy do flips and you make him dizzy and fuzzy and…"

"Adam." Derek said, getting the little boy's attention. He shut up for a second, and smirked at Derek.

"Wipe that grin off your face, boy." Derek said as Adam grinned brighter, his teeth showing as he tipped his head back and let out a laugh.

"I swear… I cannot get a word in when he's around." Derek sighed as he sat in a chair across the room and rested his elbows on his knees as he looked across at Meredith as she watched him, Adam's head tipped back against her neck as she shook her head and laughed. "What?" Derek asked.

"You're not going to deny anything he said?" Meredith asked with a giggle.

"Deny it? He told you exactly what happened."

"You said the 'f' word to Mark?" Meredith asked.

"Yes." Derek said as he leaned forward and stared across at her. "I said the 'f' word."

"You said the "L" word too?" Meredith asked.

"I did."

"Out loud?"

"Yes."

"In front of people?"

"To people, Meredith… I love you." He said, his eyes directly on hers.

"See." Adam whispered in her ear, she giggled.

"I see." Meredith said as she snuggled the little boy in her arms.

"I love you, Meredith." Derek replied.

"Say you love him too…" Adam whispered into Meredith's ear, making her giggle at the little boy's insistence.

"You love him too…" Meredith said, a sarcastic smirk on her face, as Derek's ears turned red, and a surprised smile appeared on his lips.

"Close enough?" He whispered.

"Almost…" She swallowed, glancing to Adam, who was inches from her, he smiled into her eyes. "I love you, Adam." She said with a giggle as she listened to Derek's groan.

"I love you, Meredith." Adam said, as he swung his arms around her neck and hug her tightly.

"Don't worry, Derek." Emma said from her bed as she tapped his shoulder. He tipped his head back and looked into the little girl's blue-green eyes. "I love you."

"I'm glad someone does." Derek said with a laugh as the little girl kissed his forehead and giggled, as she lay back on her pillow and laughed.

* * *

11:00 PM

Derek and Adam visited with Meredith, Emma, and Ellis. They ate dinner at the hospital together, and Derek and Meredith walked Emma up and down the hallways together to get her out of the bed for a little while. She needed to stretch her legs, she needed to try to move around without getting dizzy. She was going to be discharged in the morning, so there were a couple of things that they needed to be assured of before she was allowed to go home. Meredith tucked her daughter into her bed carefully, the day's events having worn on her a little as Derek then tucked her into the bed beside Emma's.

Ellis had excused herself to make some phone calls and find an empty on call room, leaving the four of them together. Adam had long since fallen asleep on Meredith's bed, curled into her arms.

Derek stood above the bed and leaned down to kiss Meredith goodnight, and lift Adam, when Meredith shook her head and held out her hand. "You don't have to go." She whispered.

"I should get him home." Derek replied.

"But he's sleeping." Meredith said, looking up at Derek with a pleading look.

"But he's sleeping with you…" Derek mumbled. "Where do I sleep?"

"There's enough room here for you…" She whispered, watching the glint of mischievousness in his eyes. "We can cuddle…"

"Cuddle…?" Derek asked. "You want to cuddle with me?"

"Yeah." She said with her eyebrows raised. "I want you to cuddle with me." She said as she moved slightly in the bed, curling herself around the little boy a little more as Derek walked around the other side of the bed and slipped his shoes off. He pulled himself into the bed, pulling the blanket that Meredith had offered him over himself as he lay on his side on the cramped bed. "Here…" She said, reaching behind her, she took his arm and stretched it across her waist. "Much better…" She whispered.

He pushed his nose into her hair and breathed deeply, feeling a slight shudder coming from her body as he watched the pink in her cheeks to become slightly deeper. "You're beautiful." He whispered into her hair as he felt her pull him into her closer, he gave her a light squeeze. "I'm serious…" He whispered.

"Shh…" She whispered as she turned her head and looked into his eyes, watching him smile down at her. "Bed time…" She whispered.

"You don't want me to tell you that you're beautiful?" He whispered.

"Stop flirting… go to sleep…" She teased with a slight giggle in her voice as she lay her head back on her pillow.

"Geez… I was just saying…" He whispered in faux irritation. "Can't a guy call a girl beautiful without getting his head cut off around her, I mean geez… really…"

"Derek…" She giggled.

"Where's the respect… the mutual admiration… the love? Where's the love, Meredith… where's the love?" He asked as she looked up into his eyes and smiled. He could see the love in her eyes, and he could tell that she wasn't sure if she should use it, even if she were just trying to get him to be quiet. She opened her mouth, and closed it again, catching her words before they escaped.

"If I say it, will you be quiet?" She whispered.

"Probably not." He said with a smile.

"Derek." She said with a sly grin on her lips. "I love…when you are quiet." She said, listening to the guffaw that escaped his lips as he tried to remain quiet, his lips moving swiftly as they landed on her neck, sending her wiggling. "Derek…" She squeaked quietly, trying not to squirm too much. "Derek, you're going to wake up Adam…" She said as she pulled his arm around her tighter, as he left one more kiss on her neck before settling back onto the pillow.

"You are beautiful." He whispered, cuddling her even more, as he fell asleep soundly against her.

* * *

4:00AM-

"Psssst…"

"Mm…" Adam mumbled as he tried to sleep, something was tapping on him to try to rouse him. "Daddy… shh…"

"Psst… Adam." A smaller voice squeaked, tapping on his arm. "Adam."

Adam opened his eyes, finding himself staring into a pair of familiar blue-green eyes. "Emma?" He whispered sleepily.

"Come with me." She said as she nodded toward the door.

"Come with you? Where are you going?" Adam whispered back.

"I dunno… I just can't sleep." She whispered.

"I can…" Adam said as he tried to pull away from her.

"Adam… please." Emma whispered, pulling on his arm. "Please?" She whispered.

"Emma… I'm sleepy…"

"I had a bad dream." She said with a whimper, watching Adam's eyes open as he raised his eyebrows.

"You had a bad dream?" He whispered, turning his head to see that Meredith was sleeping soundly, and though her arm was around him, he was able to wiggle slightly out of her grip, watching Emma take a step back. He climbed from the bed and reached out for Emma's hand. "Are you okay?" He asked as she gripped his hand and walked with him toward her bed.

"I am scared…" She whispered.

"Don't be scared." Adam said with a shrug. "Daddy's here… and your mom, she's here…"

"Not in my dream…" Emma whispered. "Mama was gone in my dream…. Derek took her away."

"Noooo…." Adam shook his head. "Daddy isn't going to take your mommy away." He said as he glanced to the two adults sleeping. "Let's go for a walk." He said with a smile.

"A walk?" Emma whispered.

"Yeah… Daddy says a walk always makes him feel better when he's worried about something. "Let's go…"

"Adam, I can't leave… if I leave, then mommy will be all alone."

"Daddy is here." Adam shrugged. "She'll be okay…" He said as Emma nodded and glanced toward the bed. Adam walked around to the other side of the bed and pulled out the wheelchair. "Hop in." He said as she tilted her head at him. "You're in your hospital clothes… if we walk around, your butt will show."

"Oh!" She giggled as she reached behind her to grab her gown, trying to see if there was a space. She found that it had been tied securely, but she made her way toward the wheelchair just in case. "Are you going to push me in it?" She asked.

"Yeah… get in…" He said as he pushed the brakes on the wheelchair to hold hit steady. He walked around the front of it and helped Emma into it. He reached up onto the bed and grabbed a small blanket. "Here, put that on your lap… so if you get cold…"

"Thank you." Emma said with a smile as Adam smiled and walked around the wheelchair. He popped the brakes off the wheels and started to push the chair. It wasn't difficult, but getting out the door was hard to manage. He held the door open with his back as he pulled her backwards, looking down the hallway he noticed that no one was around, and the hallways were a little dimmer than they were during the day. "It's quiet out here…" Emma whispered.

"Yeah… the hospital is all sleeping…" Adam replied as he pulled her around in a circle and started to push her down the hallway.

"Where are we going?" Emma asked inquisitively as Adam shrugged.

"I dunno… we can go somewhere quiet…" He said as he pushed the wheelchair down the hallway undetected. There were a couple of nurses at the nurse's station, but both were engrossed in their paperwork, and neither noticed the wheelchair rolling slowly down the hallway in front of the desk. Adam wasn't tall enough to be seen over it, and Emma remained quiet as the wheelchair moved down the hallway toward the elevator. They reached the elevator, and Adam glanced back, seeing no one, he pushed the button and waited. It arrived on their floor, and he walked behind the wheelchair and began to push once more. Once in the elevator, Adam pushed the button for the floor and walked alongside the wheelchair. He leaned his hand on the wall and looked back at Emma, much like his father did when he was standing in the elevator, and when it arrived at the lobby, he pulled her out into the darker, empty lobby.

"Do you like going for walks?" Emma asked as Adam nodded his head.

"Yeah…" He said nonchalantly, as if he did this all the time. He shrugged his shoulders. "Walks are cool… sometimes a kid's gotta think."

Emma giggled at how he was trying to sound grown up, her eyes sparkling as she tipped her head back and looked at him. He giggled as he pushed the wheelchair, toward the front doors of the hospital. "Are we going outside?" Emma asked.

"Um…" Adam thought as he glanced to the corner of the lobby, he noticed a small alcove by the stairs. It seemed to be pretty peaceful there, and he smiled. "No… um… let's go over there." He said, pointing toward the chairs, he pushed her wheelchair across the lobby floor, and Emma enjoyed the ride, smiling from her comfortable wheelchair seat, she allowed Adam to pull the wheelchair over to the corner. "Hey, are you hungry?" He asked as she nodded her head, arriving at the seats, he glanced toward the vending room. "I have a dollar… do you want a candy bar?"

"Sure…" Emma said with a smile, watching him pull the dollar from his pocket, he held up his finger for her to wait, and he ran across the floor to the vending room. After a few moments, she could hear him running back toward their spot, and he slid into one of the waiting room chairs and handed her the candy bar. "Aren't you gonna have any?" Emma asked.

"We can share." Adam replied as he watched her carefully peel away the wrapper. She broke the candy bar in half and handed him a piece.

"Can I ask you a question?" Emma asked as she tilted her head.

"Sure." Adam said as he took a bite out of his piece of candy bar.

"If your daddy… is my mommy's boyfriend…"

"Yeah…"

"What happens when my daddy comes back for us?" She whispered as she took a bite of the candy bar, watching Adam give her a confused look.

"Back for you? I thought your daddy was in heaven…"

"He is… that's what mommy says." She shrugged. "He's in heaven… but sometimes… sometimes when mommy gets really sad… she cries and tells my daddy to come back for us."

"No!" Adam said as he shook his head. "No… your daddy can't come back for you…" He shook his head.

"Yes he can… Mommy said so… mommy sometimes says she wishes he'd come take us away too…"

"Then you'd go to heaven too…" Adam replied.

"Yes…" She shrugged. "But… I loved my daddy, and he went to heaven… and your mommy… she's in heaven… why are we still here, if heaven is where the people we love are…"

"No… no, no… no…." Adam shook his head. "I love daddy."

"What happens if he goes to heaven?" Emma whispered.

"No! Stop it!" Adam exclaimed. "Stop it, Emma… no!" Adam rested his head in his hands as he shook his head. "Don't be a dummy."

"I'm not a dummy!" Emma exclaimed as she threw the rest of her candy bar at him. "Take me back to my room now…" She said with a pout.

"You're talking silly…. Daddy is never going to heaven… ever." Adam said definitively. "He is staying here with me… and if your mommy wants to go to heaven… then she's crazy… because people who go to heaven never get to see the people they love ever again."

"Not even in heaven?" She asked.

"No." Adam replied. "Not even there." He shook his head.

"Adam?" Emma whispered as he looked up at her, tears in her eyes as she tried not to cry.

"Hmm…?" He asked.

"Do you think mommy is going to forget my daddy?"

"No." Adam replied. "Not ever… because you are a part of your daddy… and as long as you're around… your daddy is still here. That's what daddy says about my mommy." Adam explained. "Nothing can take her from my heart." He said as Emma listened intently as she nodded her head, carefully taking the piece of candy bar that she had thrown at Adam back from him, as he handed it back to her, still in its wrapper.

* * *

Derek wasn't sure what had roused him from his sleep, maybe it was the tickle in his nose, or the soft whimpering coming from the woman in his arms. All he knew was that he had awoken to the sound of Meredith's tender whimper. He leaned over her slightly as he tried to see her face, noting that she had tears running down her face as she cried. She was obviously sleeping, and he could feel his heart breaking for her as she sniffled.

"Meredith?" He whispered. "Mer…" He said as he tried to pull her from her somber and sad dream. Whatever it was that was making her cry, he wanted to pull her from it gently so he wouldn't frighten her. "Meredith…" He said, his breath brushing across her skin tenderly as he watched her eyes open slightly.

"Mm…" She grumbled as she rolled to her side and looked into his eyes.

"You were crying in your sleep." He whispered, watching a tinge of embarrassment slip into her features as he shook his head. "It's okay…" He whispered. "I'm here…" He said, as if those two words would bring about buckets of comfort, he watched a small smile raise on her lips as she let a tiny giggle escape.

"You're here…" She whispered as she watched his eyes as they traveled across the room to the other bed, and she saw the look of shock in his eyes, and could feel her heart jump into her throat, not knowing what it meant. Emma. She turned her head toward the bed and gasped. "Emma…" She whispered as she started to sit up. "Where's Emma?"

"Where's Adam?" Derek said as he rolled off the bed quickly. "Shit, shit, shit!" He exclaimed. "That little…"

"Derek!"

"I was going to say thief…" Derek said as he slipped his shoes on, and stood up straight. "But thanks for believing in me." He said with a slight smirk.

"Where could they be?" She asked as she tried to roll out of the bed.

"Um… well, we don't know when they disappeared… and we don't know why… Meredith… you have to stay here…" Derek said as he walked up to her.

"No… my baby is missing… and Adam…Where… why are they…? You have no idea where they are, Derek!" Meredith said stubbornly.

"Yes… but you don't know your way around the hospital… stay here…" Derek said as he leaned in to give her a kiss on the nose.

"Stop doing the lovey dovey thing! My daughter is missing, and you're trying to distract me!"

"Stay here, Meredith…" Derek said as he started to walk toward the door.

"Derek!" she exclaimed as he turned when he got to the door, she stood awkwardly next to the bed.

"Please find her in one piece…" She said with a whimper. "And tell Adam he's going to get it…" She sighed.

"Don't you worry about Mister Adam… he is going to get it." Derek said as he disappeared out of the door.

He looked both ways down the hallway, and tried to figure out where they'd go. He had noticed that the wheelchair was not in the room, so he immediately ran toward the elevator. "Hey…" he shouted to the nurses. "Did you see a little boy out here?" She asked, watching them shake their head, he sighed. "Thanks…." He muttered as he pushed the elevator button, trying to figure out where they would go.

He sighed. "I may as well start at the bottom floor…" He said as he pushed the button for the lobby.

* * *

"Then we moved to Seattle… and it was pretty cool out there… LOTS of rain… but it was neat… lots of cool trails and stuff, and some neat parks… nothing like Central park or like that." Adam shrugged.

"I love Central park…" Emma smiled. "Did you ever go on one of the horse carriage rides?"

"Um… no… that's for boyfriends and girlfriends… not for dads and their kids…" Adam shook his head.

"No… Don't be silly… it's for anyone… Mommy took me on one when we moved to New York. It was amazing!" Emma said with a smile as she yawned.

"You're tired…" Adam pointed out as he smiled at Emma. "I should probably get to you the room… before… oh crap…" He said as he watched his father step out of the elevator.

"What?" Emma asked.

"I gotta go!" He exclaimed as he took off running away from Emma.

"Adam!" Emma called. "Adam! Don't leave me all alone!" She exclaimed "Adam!" She shouted as suddenly, someone pulled at the wheelchair. She squeaked in surprise and tipped her head back, noticing that it was Derek. "Derek…" She said with a sigh. "Adam ran away…"

"Yeah, he ran away… and with good reason…" Derek said with a huff. "Adam Michael Shepherd, come out here right now." Derek said in an angry voice that echoed off the empty hospital walls. He glanced toward the large windows and noted that it was just starting to get light out. The sky was holding a pretty light blue that was beginning to lighten up with the rising sun. He stomped down the hallway with Emma in the wheelchair. "Adam!" Derek called as he stopped for a second.

"Derek, we weren't being bad… Adam was just being nice… he took me for a walk… it's okay… I'm okay…" She promised. "Adam was being a good friend… please don't get mad at Adam. Please…" She whimpered.

"Adam…" Derek said again as he sighed. "If you come out here before I count to five… you won't be in as much trouble…. Got it? One… Two… three… four…." He counted as suddenly, the dark haired boy popped out from behind the counter.

"Daddy?" He whispered.

"Out here right now… front and center!" Derek exclaimed as Adam slinked from behind the desk. "What on earth do you think you're doing?" He asked. "Emma is a patient… You can't just take patients out of their room… you can't do that, Adam… you can't!"

"She's my friend though." Adam said with a sigh. "She had a bad dream… she wanted to talk. I'm sorry…" He whimpered.

"Come over here right now and put your hands on the handle of this wheelchair… and you will not take them off until we get back to Emma's room… and when we get back to Emma's room, you will apologize to Meredith for making her worry."

"But… but…"

"No buts… the only buts here is going to be your butt standing over here, and Emma's butt staying in this wheelchair until we get back into her room." Derek said with a stern voice, watching his son walk toward him, his eyes downcast.

"Can't we talk about this?" Adam asked as he looked up at Derek, who didn't answer, he only raised his eyebrows as he watched Adam look back at the floor as he took the handles of the wheel chair, as Derek also took the handles, and the two of them pushed the wheelchair silently toward the elevator.

* * *

The three remained quiet for the trip back toward Emma's room, the little girl tipped her head back and looked up at Derek. "Please don't be mad at Adam, Derek." Emma said softly. "I had a bad dream. He was just taking me for a walk." Emma whimpered as her lower lip stuck out. "Please, Derek…"

Derek listened to the little girl, but didn't respond, only nodded at her insistence, and shook his head as Adam walked with his head down and his hands on the handles of the wheelchair. "Emma… don't worry about it." Adam sighed.

"No…" Emma said softly. "You didn't do anything wrong, Adam… He didn't do nothing wrong, Derek." Emma said as tears rolled down her cheeks. "He didn't do nothing wrong…"

"Yes I did." Adam shrugged as they reached the room, Derek stopped and looked at the little girl's head tipped back slightly, her eyes pleading with him. He pulled his son's hands from the handles and grasped it, feeling a bit of resistance for a second as Adam sighed and followed his father to the front of the wheelchair. He crouched down in front of them both, looking up into their eyes as he shook his head.

"Do you know what you did wrong, Adam?" Derek asked, watching Adam nod his head.

"Don't steal patients." Adam replied.

"You got it." Derek said with a slight smirk. "Emma?" Derek asked.

"I didn't let Adam steal me..." She whimpered. "I'm the bad girl, Derek… It was all me."

"Well he did steal you… and we didn't know where you were… and if we don't know where you are, we're going to worry… if you want to go for a walk in the hospital… or anywhere, please let one of us know." Derek replied.

"You were sleeping, Daddy." Adam sighed.

"Yes… but more importantly… I would like to be able to sleep knowing that you're going to be where I left you when I did so… so no more stealing patients…and no more disappearing without telling me where you're going… got it?" Derek asked.

"Got it." He asked Emma, who nodded as she wiped her nose on her wrist.

"Got it?" He asked Adam, raising his eyebrows?

"Got it." Adam nodded.

"How about a handshake?" Derek asked, holding his hand out. Adam giggled a little as he held his hand out and shook it in the air in front of Derek, as Derek shook his hand in the air as well. "Handshake?" he asked Emma, who had been watching the boys, she giggled through her tears and held her hand out, wiggling it along with Derek and Adam, as he leaned forward and kissed her forehead. "Are you okay?" He whispered as she nodded her head and watched Derek carefully. He then looked to Adam. "You?" He asked as he smiled sleepily at his son, who nodded his head. "Good." He said. "Now go into the room… tell Meredith that you're sorry, and that Emma is alright… and we'll be coming right behind you, in a minute…"

"Okay…" Adam nodded as he leaned forward and kissed his daddy's cheek. "Love you, Daddy."

"Love you too…" Derek said, watching Adam turn quickly and run into the room. Derek turned and glanced to Emma, raising his eyebrows at her. "Do you think I let him off too easy?" He asked as he watched her smile and shake her head. "He was just trying to be a good friend, huh?" Derek asked as Emma nodded. "He'd make a pretty good friend, wouldn't he?" Derek asked, smiling at Emma as she nodded once again.

"I'm glad." Derek said as he stood up and sighed as he moved around to the back of the wheelchair. "Now let's go in and face your mommy…huh?" He said as he pushed the door handle, and backed the wheelchair into the room.

"AND THEN THE ALIENS CAME DOWN AND…" Adam's exclamation stopped as watched the door open and his father stepped through with a surprised expression as he stood in front of Meredith as she stood leaned against the bed. "Then Daddy found us and here we are again." He mumbled as he moved quickly and quietly for the bed, climbing atop it as he watched Derek's expression.

Meredith looked very amused as she watched Derek pull her daughter into the room. "Well there you are… I heard you had an adventure…" Meredith said, obviously calmer since she had seen her daughter alive and well.

"I had a bad dream, Mommy…" Emma mumbled.

"So instead of waking me up, you ran off and disappeared?" Meredith asked.

"We were coming back, mama…" She said as Derek lifted her from the wheelchair and carried her toward her bed. "Sorry…" She said softly.

"I was worried…" Meredith said as she shuffled over toward her daughter's bed, leaning over her as she pulled the blankets onto her. "We're going home… a couple of hours…" Meredith whispered as she kissed her daughter's head. "Aren't you tired?"

"No." She mumbled.

"She was tired, but then she had a bad dream, so we took a walk." Adam explained. "Daddy always takes a walk when he needs to think, don't you Daddy?" he asked as he turned to Derek, who looked away sheepishly, rolling his eyes.

"So this was your fault?" Meredith asked with a laugh.

"Oh, we're not playing the blame game…" Derek said as he leaned down and kissed the little girl. "Our kids work together in a plot to overthrow the hospital, and it's automatically my fault?" He asked as he lifted Adam into his arms and reached for Meredith's hand. "Come on…" Derek said, nodding toward the bed.

"What if I'm not tired?" She whispered, her eyebrows lifting as she glanced to Emma who lay in her bed sleepily smiling at her mother.

"Then I'm going to climb into that bed, snuggle with Adam, and you're going to be stuck sitting there against Emma's bed… and eventually fall back to sleep… then, you're going to fall to the ground like a sack of potatoes…" He said as he listened to the two kids giggling.

"Sack of taters…" Adam giggled.

"Yep… a sack of taters…" Derek replied. "Are you coming to bed?" He whispered.

"Derek?" Emma asked as she watched him smile over at her.

"Yes, sweetheart?"

"Will you snuggle with me instead of mommy?" She whispered.

"Hey… you're trying to steal my boyfriend…" Meredith said, raising her eyebrows at her daughter, who giggled.

"Well… since you stole me from her… and you don't want to snuggle with me now… technically… I could snuggle with whoever I want." Derek shrugged. They stood staring at one another for a moment as they smirked sleepily at one another across the room as Derek set Adam on the other bed, and crossed his arms over his chest. "What do you think about that?" he asked with a shake of the head.

"Paleeeeaaaasse, Derek…." Emma whined from her bed as he tried not to smile at her. "I'll be extra good…" She promised.

"Extra good… Oh… I like that promise…" Derek said as he moved across the floor toward Emma's bed as Meredith continued to lean against the bed.

"You spoil her." Meredith said as he reached her, leaning forward, he pressed his forehead against hers, she kissed his lips tenderly and looked into his eyes.

"You spoil me." He whispered. "I'm going to snuggle with Emma… but not because she's trying to steal me." Derek whispered. "I just want to be a good friend… make sure she doesn't have any more nightmares." Derek said as Meredith smiled into his eyes.

"Derek…" She whispered as she took his hand as he tried to take hers. "I… I l…. I really like you." She whispered.

"And I like you." He whispered, as he kissed her lips once again, smiling into her eyes as he turned and lifted himself onto Emma's bed, pulling the little girl to him as he watched Meredith turn her head and watch him hold the little girl tenderly in his arms as she smiled. She slowly shifted across the room toward Adam's bed. Adam pulled the blanket away, and held his hand out to her as she carefully climbed onto the bed, pulling her leg with the knee brace carefully onto the bed with the rest of her, as Adam covered them both with the blanket and pushed his body into hers as she wrapped her arm around him, facing the other bed. She watched across the room to the other bed, as Derek held her little girl securely to him while watching across the room at her, his eyes burning into hers as she held onto his son as if he were her own. "Sweet dreams, Meredith." He whispered, a smile at his lips as he watched her sleepy expression.

"More adventures later today, Derek. Sweet dreams." She whispered.

"I love you, Meredith." Adam mumbled as she held him to her comfortably.

"I love you too." She whispered, her eyes closing slowly, as they opened one more time, to see him watching over them all, a relaxed and loving smile on his lips before they closed tightly, and she fell back into a comfortable slumber.

* * *

When Ellis walked into the hospital room in the morning, she let out a laugh at the scene before her. Two beds, opposite sides of the room, the occupants each an adult and child, snuggled tightly together as a wheelchair sit abandoned in the middle of the room. When she had left the room, her granddaughter had her bed all to herself, and Meredith and Adam had been cuddled together on the other bed sound asleep when she had said goodnight to Derek and quietly slipped from the room. She wondered for a moment what had happened during the night to have it appear as if there were a rousing game of musical beds in the middle of the night.

Ellis had taken it upon herself to have her granddaughter discharged, she had appeared to be doing just fine post surgery, and if she could get the little girl to wake, without frightening her, or the grown man who she was clinging to, it would make everything much easier. "Emma bear?" Ellis said softly as she approached the bed, glancing over at her daughter's bed, where the woman had her arm wrapped securely around the little boy, her hand resting delicately on the bed while his tiny cheek set upon it as he slept peacefully. "Emma… sweetheart?" She whispered as the little girl's eyes fluttered open.

"Gma…?" She whispered as she turned her head and looked up at her grandmother as she stood with her hand gently touching the little girl's shoulder.

"Are you ready to go home?" She whispered as she smiled at the little girl's half smile as she giggled, carefully letting Derek's shirt slip from her fingers, she rolled over and held her arms out for Ellis, who lifted her from Derek's arms without him even flinching in his sleep. Ellis held her in her arms and leaned forward, kissing her cheek. "Derek is pretty sleepy, isn't he?" Ellis whispered.

"Uh huh…" She nodded. "Sleepy head, Derek."

"Yes… sleepy head." Ellis laughed softly. "Gma brought you a change of clothes… let's get you changed, and then we'll get mommy moving… what do you say?" She asked as Emma nodded her head and rested it on her grandmother's shoulder as Ellis carried the little girl toward the bathroom to get her changed.

The room was fairly silent as the little boy in the bed across the way heard the sound of the door clicking, his eyes opening slowly as he yawned. He rubbed his eye slightly, and he looked over to the bed, when he realized that someone was missing. "Oh CRAP!" Adam exclaimed as he sat up quickly, making Meredith jump with his exclamation, she sat up.

"What? What? What's going on, Adam? What's wrong?"

"Emma is missing again!" He exclaimed, pointing across at his father, who lay sleeping soundly on the bed.

"Oh!" Meredith exclaimed as she started to get up. "No… God… where…"

"I did NOT do it this time, Meredith… this time it is NOT my fault!" Adam exclaimed as he slid from the bed.

"Derek?" Meredith called, her voice a bit panicky as she started to look around the room, watching Adam look under the beds. "Derek!" Meredith exclaimed as she slid from the bed and reached for her shoe, she watched as Adam ran for the door and looked out it as she lifted the shoe quickly, sending it flying across the room. If it were possible for everything to turn to slow motion, it would have been that moment, the look of shock appeared on her face before the shoe even hit its target, slamming into Derek's forehead.

"HOLY CRAP!" Derek exclaimed as he leapt up and grabbed his forehead, looking across the room as Meredith grabbed her mouth in shock, her eyes wide as Derek held his hand on his head.

"HA! You did it AGAIN, Meredith!" Adam exclaimed as Meredith tried desperately not to laugh as Derek whimpered and held his forehead, trying to feel for blood or a bump.

"What the heck are you doing?" Derek asked as he looked across at her. "You could have knocked tooth out or something!" He exclaimed as Meredith continued to shake her head and giggle behind her hand.

"Emma is missing, Daddy!" Adam exclaimed as Derek gave his son a shake of his head and continued to rub his forehead.

"Emma is not missing…" Derek mumbled as he gave Meredith a faux glare.

"Then where is she, Mister Smarty pants?" Adam said as Derek dropped his hand and gave his son a look of surprise, his eyebrows raising as Adam's jaw dropped. "I mean… Mister Daddy pants…" He mumbled as Meredith watched the two of them challenging one another.

"She was abducted by aliens." Derek replied as Meredith's brow furrowed in confusion. She could tell that Derek did indeed know where Emma was, but at this point was just playing around. She felt her heart rate slowing as she watched Derek grip her shoe in his hand and continue to rub his head.

"Aliens? Are you KIDDING me?" Adam exclaimed. "There's no such thing as aliens." Adam said confidently.

"That's funny…" Meredith said as Adam's head snapped in her direction. "Just this morning you said something about aliens and abductions when I asked you where you and Emma went to."

"Well, those are different kinds of Aliens, Meredith." Adam said, shaking his head. "Daddy's aliens don't exist."

"They don't?" Derek said as he gave Adam a confused look. "Well… My aliens are about…. hm… this tall…" He said as he held his hand up at a height that was approximate to Ellis' and they have blondish hair… a pair of reading glasses around their neck… seldom understand jokes… I'm pretty sure it was an alien…" Derek nodded as the door opened, and Ellis walked in holding Emma's hand. Emma was dressed and smiling as she looked across to see her mother sitting up in bed, and Derek in his as Adam stood between the two of them.

Adam spun around, and when he saw Ellis, his jaw dropped. "Omygosh!" Adam exclaimed as he started to laugh.

"What is so funny?" Ellis asked as Adam began to laugh harder.

Emma walked over to her mother and hugged her as they all watched Adam drop to the floor laughing hysterically. He rolled onto his back and looked up as Emma walked over to him and watched him with a bemused expression. "Derek, I think there is something wrong with him." She said as she raised an eyebrow at Derek.

"Omygosh, omygosh!" Adam exclaimed, as he laughed, making Meredith and Derek chuckle at the little boy on the floor.

"What's wrong with Adam?" Emma asked as she giggled at him.

"He had a little too much silly juice this morning…" Derek said as he shook his head and stood up, reaching out for his son's hand, he took it securely in his own as he pulled the little boy from the floor as he continued to giggle.

"Silly juice?" Emma giggled.

"Yep… looks like a whole gallon of silly juice…" Derek said as he lifted the little boy upside down as he started a whole new wave of giggles from him.

"Are you ready to go home, kid?" Derek asked as he smiled across at the little girl, her pink outfit seemingly bringing color to her face as she smiled up at Derek, and back at her mother.

"Yeah… I'm ready…" She said as she held out her hand to her mother. "Let's go home, Mama…" She said as she started to walk for the door.

"Wait, wait…" Derek said as he set Adam on the bed as he watched him flop backwards, still giggling. He shook his head at the little boy and turned around. He glanced to Ellis. "Stay right there…" He said as he watched her give him a funny look as he walked quickly out the door into the hallway. He then opened the door and pulled a wheelchair into the room.

"Oh, I don't need one of those, Derek." She shook her head.

"Yep… hospital policy…" He said as he glanced to Meredith, who eyed him carefully, glancing to the second wheelchair in the room.

"You're not dragging me out of this hospital in a wheelchair, Doctor Shepherd." Meredith said as she watched him walk up to her as Emma climbed into the one wheel chair. He kicked Meredith's shoe across the floor away from her.

"Then your feet are going to be pretty cold on your way out to the car." He said with a laugh, as he lifted her from the edge of the bed.

"Give me my shoes back!"

"You're not allowed to have weapons in the hospital…" Derek said as he set her down in the chair. He looked up at Ellis, who was laughing at the whole situation, she walked to the other wheelchair and watched Adam as he hopped from the bed. "Are you ready to go?" He whispered, leaning down to whisper into Meredith's ear, as her frustration turned to shyness.

"Yes." She whispered tenderly and demurely.

"Good." He whispered as he kissed her cheek and turned to Adam. "Kid… grab those weapons, and hold onto them with your life.

"Got it, Doc!" Adam exclaimed as he ran toward the corner where Derek had kicked her shoe, he then ran toward the bed and grabbed her shoe from the mattress.

"Alright… we're on our way, then…" Derek said softly as he leaned down and kissed Meredith's lips, and quietly followed Ellis and Emma's lead out the door, into the hallway on their way out of the hospital.

* * *

Upon reaching the lobby, the five of them walked toward the front doors of the hospital. The conversation was light, but Derek seemed slightly out of it as they rolled the wheelchairs up toward the door. "Ellis…?" He asked as he held out his hand.

"Yes?" Ellis asked, giving him a strange look as her eyes moved from his hand to his eyes. Meredith watched the exchange and laughed.

"He wants your car keys." Meredith said as Ellis gave him a smirk.

"And why should I give them to you?" She asked as she crossed her arms over her chest and watched him tilt his head in a humored way.

"I was trying to be gentlemanly… I was trying to be polite… and you're going to give me slack?" Derek asked.

"Don't give him slack, Grandma." Adam said as he shook his head. Ellis looked to the little boy, who shrugged. "Please?" he asked, as he gave her a curious look.

"It's Gma, Adam." Emma argued, watching Adam look to her and nod.

"Gma? Got it." He said as he smirked. "Don't give daddy slack, Gma. Hand over the keys, and nobody gets hurt again…" He shrugged as Meredith let out a laugh at the seriousness in Adam's voice. Ellis took her keys from her pocket and tossed them at Derek.

"Leave the smarty pants with me…" Ellis said, nodding toward Adam as Derek smirked.

"Gladly." He said as he reached down and grabbed one of Meredith's shoes and started walking toward the door.

"Hey, come back here with that…" Meredith said as she laughed, watching him wave the shoe in the air as he laughed, and disappeared out the sliding glass doors toward the parking lot.

They waited patiently for about ten minutes, when they watched Ellis' car roll slowly up toward the curb. Meredith very carefully climbed from her wheelchair as Adam ran to her side and grasped her hand tightly. "Woah… be careful there…" He said as Meredith watched the little boy act as if he were directing a large heavy object. She looked up to see Derek coming toward her.

"Wait, wait wait…" Meredith said as she held out her hands to the two boys. "I can handle this myself." She said as she walked painfully forward, as they both stood back. Ellis in the meantime was walking through the door with Emma in the wheelchair, they glanced back to see both Adam and Derek poised to grab Meredith if she had fallen, she tried to walk, her bare feet touching the cold tile floor as she tried to make her way toward the car. When suddenly, he couldn't take it anymore, and Derek reached forward and grabbed her. He laughed as she squealed and he scooped her into his arms as she giggled wildly.

"Any excuse to touch you…" He grunted as she laughed, looking around. "What are you looking for?" He asked as she looked up at his face, lifting her hand to his forehead, she gave him a concerned grimace at the red mark on his skin. "That's right… you did that to me…" He said as she leaned up and very gently placed her lips on his skin, sending shots of excitement running through his body.

"Where is my shoe?" She whispered as he laughed, watching her give him a surprised look as he shook his head and carried her out toward the car, with Adam right behind him.

"Your shoe is in a very safe place now… someplace where it cannot hurt anyone…" He said with a laugh as he carried her toward the car. Ellis opened the passenger side door, and Derek carefully lifted her into the seat. "There… safe and sound…" he said as he crouched down slightly, watching her smile at him. Adam moved in front of him, pushing into view as Derek put his hand around his son.

"You're not coming with us?" Meredith asked, her eyebrows raising as she tilted her head.

"I'm afraid not, Cinderella." Derek said as he tilted his head, handing her the shoe that Adam had been holding. "I have to get Adam to my sister's house… and start my shift…"

"Adam can come with us." Ellis said as Adam turned to his father with a big grin. Derek shook his head and Adam's face fell.

"Not today…" He shrugged. "Maybe another… time, but you know… Meredith and Emma need to get settled at the house… and I can call you, you… you can call me." Derek said to Meredith as he smiled at her as she watched him. "Maybe we could go out on a date… something like that." He said with a smile.

"A date?" Meredith asked. "Aren't we doing this a little bit backwards?" Meredith whispered.

"Maybe a little bit…" Derek chuckled. "But I want to show you how you make me feel… how much I appreciate you." Derek said softly as he leaned forward and smiled. "How much I love you." He said, watching her smile shyly, her cheeks turning red as he left a tender kiss on her lips. "Have a good day, Meredith." He whispered.

"You too, Derek." She said softly as she kissed him sweetly. "Adam…I'll see you soon too…"

"Yeah…" Adam shrugged disappointedly.

"Emma bear?" Derek said as he looked into the back seat as Ellis closed the door, and the little girl looked to him with a smile. "What did we talk about?"

"No more climbing." She said with a smile.

"That's right… no more climbing… and why aren't we going to be climbing anymore?"

"Because climbing is for monkeys…"

"That's right." Derek nodded. "And you're a …"

"Princess, and not a monkey." Emma said, watching Derek smile as Meredith laughed.

"That's right." Derek said with a smile as he looked to Meredith again. "Bye…" He whispered.

"Bye." Meredith said softly as she tipped her head.

"Glove compartment." He said quickly as he stood up and took a step back.

"What?" Meredith asked.

"I'll see you later, Doctor Grey." Derek said, waving at Ellis, who shook her head and climbed into the driver's seat.

"Have a good one, Doctor Shepherd." She said as Derek took a step back.

"What do you mean, glove compartment?" She asked, watching Derek blow her a kiss as he closed the door.

He held Adam's shoulders as they both stepped back, waving softly as Ellis began to pull away. He watched her carefully as they waved, watching, and laughing as Meredith opened the glove compartment, he smiled brightly when she threw her head back in laughter and pulled her shoe from within it, as she giggled and turned her head, taking one more long look at the two boys, before Ellis drove them from view.


	5. Home For Christmas

Meredith and Emma arrived home, and with Ellis' help they entered the empty house together. Emma ran into the living room and grinned. "Home!" She exclaimed happily as she took a deep breath, turning around to face her mother, she smiled. "We're home, mama."

"We are home…" Meredith said with a sigh as she looked around the house. "Did someone clean?" She asked, noting that the mess that she had left the house in, was no longer. Everything was put in its place, and it was strangely clean. "Mom…?" Meredith said again.

"I didn't touch anything, dear." She said, putting her bag onto the floor as she watched her granddaughter walk over to her. The bandage around her head was the only indication that anything had happened. "Well, I hope that you intended on showing me this bedroom of yours. I never got a chance to see it since you two up and moved out of Boston." Ellis said as she watched Meredith continue to stand and look around. "Don't gawk, dear. Make yourself useful, or rest…" She said as Emma took her hand. "I'm going to go see Emma's bedroom." She said as she smiled and let the little girl tug her hand.

Ellis walked toward the stairs and looked back at Meredith for a moment, concern shining in her eyes as she watched her daughter's worn appearance. She stood staring at the floor for a moment, as if she were trying to think of what to do, or what to say, and Ellis could feel the sadness in her heart clear across the room. She let Emma pull her up the stairs, all the while giggling as they walked up the steps.

Meredith stood in the same spot for several minutes. She wished for just a moment that her mind would stop racing, that her heart would stop pounding. All she could feel at that moment was the intense anxiety of being back in the house again. She could picture the scene in her head, no matter how clean her mother and Cristina had made the house, she was always going to see everything as it was that day. She could feel her stomach lurching as she pictured her daughter's pale appearance, she could feel the pain in her body as she had crawled across the carpet to get to her little girl. She could sense it all nearby, and like a ghost, it was haunting her heart.

She was just about to sit down, when the phone rang beside her. She grabbed it off the receiver and carefully leaned back onto the couch to elevate her knee. "Hello?" She said, her voice was soft and tender, sighing she listened carefully.

"Are you alright?" The voice on the other line asked. Instantly, the knot in her stomach was a different feeling. It was still a sick feeling, but a good sick feeling, a nervous feeling, a happy feeling as she smiled slightly at his voice. "Meredith?" He said softly. "Are you alright."

"I'm alright." She replied. It was only a half lie, for she was alright when she heard his voice, but her thoughts were still elsewhere.

"Are you sure?" He asked, listening to the hollow sound in her breathing as she paused.

"I'm fine… I'm good… I'm tired." She whispered.

"You're tired…" He repeated, waiting to see if she'd say any more. "Tired of me?" He asked.

"No! Don't be ridiculous!" She exclaimed immediately, listening on the line as he laughed. "What did you call for, anyway?" She asked.

"A beautiful woman gave me her phone number yesterday." He whispered. "I just had to call it to make sure that it was real." He said as he listened to her sigh and giggle.

"And is it?" Meredith asked.

"I'm not sure." He said, his voice teasing as she giggled again. "Now… if you're not the beautiful woman that gave me this number… I apologize… But you sound more beautiful than she sounded." He whispered seductively.

"Well then." Meredith whispered. "I don't think it is very fair, that you met this beautiful woman, and you liked her enough to call her… and now you're talking to me and you're flirting with me. Do you really think that's fair to her?" Meredith flirted back as she laughed.

"She gave me the wrong number." Derek said as he chuckled.

"That's true." Meredith said as she nodded her head and laughed. "That is very true."

"I mean… why would someone do that?" Derek pouted.

"Maybe you have too much baggage?" Meredith asked.

"Are you calling my son baggage? How dare you… I don't even know you." He teased, trying to make her laugh even more.

"Not Adam!" She laughed.

"How do you know my son's name? Who is this?" Derek asked, pretending to be accusing.

"Derek!" She laughed.

"Derek? Your name is Derek? That's my name too!" He exclaimed as he listened to her string of giggles as he tried to remain serious, the smile on his face never fading as he listened to her voice. "I love your laugh." He whispered.

Meredith stopped giggling for a moment as she tried to catch her breath. "Thank you." She whispered, leaning her head on the arm of the couch as she wiped the tear from the corner of her eye.

"I was wondering…" Derek said softly as he bit his lower lip slightly. "I mean… I know that you just got home and you're getting settled… but, I mean… if… if you wanted to um…"

"Spit it out, Derek." Meredith laughed.

"Hang on a second… I'm trying to figure out what I want to say…" He said nervously, laughing as he swallowed and cleared his throat. "I haven't done this in a while, I'm a bit rusty." He said as she giggled. "Would you be interested in joining me for dinner this evening?" He asked as he listened intently for her answer.

"Um…" Meredith chewed her lower lip as she tried to figure out exactly what to ask.

"Take your time… I'm just doing brain surgery while I wait." He teased as he listened to her giggle over the line.

"Dinner?" She asked, unsure of the words she was looking for to figure what she wanted to ask.

"Yes." He replied. "I have decided against the sarcastic remark in order to spare your feelings." Derek replied.

"Why thank you, Derek… that was very thoughtful."

"You're very welcome, Derek." He replied, listening to her giggle. "So what do you say?" He whispered. "I can get my sister to watch Adam… and if you're mom is into babysitting… she can watch your little princess… we'll go out for a nice dinner together, and we can pick up the kids later for some dessert. What do you say?"

"I… um… Derek… I…" Meredith started to stammer as she nervously tapped her fingers on her leg, picturing his face, her avoidance was becoming obvious.

"I can pick you up at seven." He said softly. "Not too dressy, not too casual… don't forget to bring your laugh. I promise we will have a great time. I promise." He said.

"Derek…?" Meredith said as she tried to stop him, losing her nerve quicker and quicker by the second.

"I'll see you soon." He said. "Gotta go… surgery." He said quickly before she could refuse. "Later, Derek!" He exclaimed as he listened for a split second before he hung the phone up.

Meredith paused as she listened to the phone click. "Pushy…" She said as she put the phone back on the receiver while she stared at her knee for a moment. Very slowly, however, her sad, sullen, anxiety ridden face had broken out into a smile, a smile that she just couldn't seem to get rid of.

* * *

Meredith sat in her closet on her back, staring up at the clothes that hang above her. She was on the verge of tears as she lay there. She sighed and closed her eyes, bringing her hands to her face as she rubbed her face with her hands and groaned into them. She pulled her hands from her face and nearly screamed when she saw her mother standing above her.

"Get off the floor, Meredith." Ellis said sternly as she watched her daughter close her eyes. "I'm still here, Meredith… you can't make me disappear when you close your eyes." She replied.

"I can try." She mumbled as she rolled onto her side.

"Get up… you need to get showered and dressed."

"I'm not going. Tell him that I fell on the floor and I can't get up." She groaned.

"I'm not telling him that you fell on the floor and can't get up. Get up." She said, holding her hand out to her daughter. "Come on…" She said with a sigh. "You have been lying around all day being mopey, someone wants to take you out to dinner, and you're going to say no?"

"I don't know what to wear." She mumbled.

"Clothes. Wear clothes." Ellis replied sarcastically as Meredith opened her eyes and glared at her mother.

"Thank you, mother." She mumbled. "You're the devil." She mumbled.

"Devil or not… go take a shower." She said as she reached down and grabbed her daughter's hand, gripping it tightly. Meredith tried to shake her mother from her hand, but Ellis only pulled harder, forcing Meredith to sit up, and eventually stand as Ellis gripped her tightly to make sure she didn't fall.

"I don't know what 'clothes' to wear." She mumbled to her mother as she walked her into the bedroom and led her to the bed. Meredith flopped backwards onto the bed and stared up at her mother.

"Well, what did Derek say?" Ellis asked.

"Not too dressy, not too casual." She replied. "What does that even mean? Could he be more cryptic? Stupid man… stupid idea… stupid… stupid…"

"The only person being stupid dear, is you." Ellis said as she watched Meredith's eyes meet hers in a glare.

"Devil." Meredith mumbled.

Ellis ignored her daughter's reply and sighed. "Well, it is obvious what he means… it means he's not taking you down to the docks to make you work and he's not taking you to a ball… so there's no need to wear a poufy dress and get your hair done all fancy. You need to just wear a nice pair of pants and a tshirt or something, Meredith… it's been a hell of a lot longer since I had a date… but even I know what to wear. Go take a shower." Ellis argued.

"I…"

"Now!" Ellis barked. "No excuses, shower! The man adores you, and you adore him right back. You will not ruin this for yourself!" Ellis said as she watched Meredith's lip tremble as she looked up at her mother. "Meri…" Ellis said, shaking her head as she watched the tears begin to form in her eyes. "Meredith…" She said softly. "He's gone, Meri… he's gone and you have to get on with your life."

"I know." She said as she sniffled. "I know." She said as she rolled onto her side.

"Gma?" A tiny voice mumbled from the hallway as Ellis turned to see her granddaughter standing in the hallway peeking in.

"What is it, baby?" Ellis asked as she approached the little girl, crouching in front of her as she watched her look toward her mother. "I thought you were napping…"

"I was… you're yelling at mommy… why are you yelling at mommy?" She asked as she watched Meredith look up at her, she could see the tears in her mother's eyes. "Gma, you made mommy cry…" Emma said softly as she walked past her grandmother and climbed onto the bed.

"Gma didn't make me cry, baby…" Meredith said as she accepted the hug from her little girl, letting her settle on her chest as she rubbed her back. "Mama made herself cry." She sniffled as she looked up at her mother.

"Are you okay?" Emma whispered, looking into her mother's eyes, she gave her a sad smile as she watched her nod her head.

"Mama's okay." She whispered. "Mama is okay." She said soothingly as she rubbed her back and let the little girl rest her head on her shoulder as she looked up at Ellis.

Ellis sat on the bed beside Meredith and ran her fingers through her hair softly. She leaned down and kissed her daughter's forehead as she watched her look up at her. "You're not okay, Meredith." Ellis whispered. "You need to talk to someone." She whispered.

"I have to go take a shower." Meredith whispered as she kissed Emma's head and rolled her onto the bed, listening to her giggle. "You better get back on the couch and take that nap, young lady. After mommy has dinner with Derek, he and Adam are going to come over for some dessert." She said with a smile as Emma grinned.

"I like dessert." Emma said happily as she kissed her mother's nose and grinned.

"I know you like dessert." She said with a smile as she felt herself calming slowly as she looked into her little girl's eyes. "So go on and take that nap… and I'll get ready to go… because if I don't go…"

"Then no dessert." Emma replied.

"That's right…" Meredith said as the little girl giggled and rolled off her mother carefully, sliding off the bed. She leaned forward for another kiss and smiled. "Sweet dreams, baby." She whispered.

"Hurry and get ready… I'm hungry for dessert…" Emma said as she made her way quickly for the room.

Ellis looked down at Meredith and watched as she looked up at her mother, her eyes veiled with sadness once again. "You need to talk to someone, Meri." Ellis whispered.

"I'm trying to move on, Mom." Meredith said as she pulled herself up into a sitting position as she slid to the edge of the bed. "I don't need to relive the experience on a shrink's couch to know that my husband died and I'm messed up. I am not going to go on medication again. Once work starts up, I'll have less time to think about it. I need something to keep me busy, mom, not a stranger to listen to my problems."

"Derek doesn't know about your depression."

"Mom, Derek went through the same thing… he's going through the same thing. He knows how I feel, he understands. When the time comes, I'm sure that it'll come up. I don't need a therapist, I just need a distraction… and a shower…" She said as she carefully stood up and shuffled toward the bathroom. She walked around the corner and paused as she poked her head around the corner and glared at her mother. "Not sex, Mom." She said as Ellis laughed.

"Excuse me?" She exclaimed with a nervous laugh.

"Mark?" Meredith asked, raising her eyebrows at her mother. "Mark Sloan? Does that name sound familiar?"

"I know who Mark Sloan is, dear."

"Good… well, Cristina has been in this city for two more years than me… at a different hospital, and even she knows his reputation." Meredith laughed.

"He's a nice man, Meredith."

"Yes, he is." Meredith replied. "Very… accessible, I've heard."

"Well, yes… but he's no Derek." Ellis said with a smile to her daughter, who laughed as she turned the corner and walked back into the bathroom.

"No." Meredith laughed. "I will agree with you on that… he's no Derek." She said as she closed the door behind her, leaving her mother to laugh as she stood up and walked from the room, to make sure her granddaughter wasn't causing any trouble on her way to her nap.

* * *

Derek was smiling as he drove the car, his excitement was radiating from his body as he glanced into the back seat at Adam, who was giving his father a stare down. "Hey, what's that look for?" Derek asked, watching Adam look away.

"Nothing." Adam replied as he shrugged, staring out the window again.

"Come on, kid. Out with it." Derek replied as he watched Adam look back toward him.

"You're going out on a date with Meredith?" He asked, his voice was almost monotone as the question left his lips.

"Yes." Derek said, giving his son a confused look. "I thought you liked Meredith."

"Oh, I do." Adam nodded. "I like Meredith." He shrugged.

"You don't sound very convincing." Derek replied.

"Oh." Adam nodded. "Well, I do like her." He replied. "She's okay."

"What's with all the mixed signals?" Derek asked, watching Adam give him a strange look.

"I'm not giving any kinds of signals, daddy." Adam replied. "I think you're paranoid."

"Paranoid, you think I'm paranoid? Do you even know what that word means?"

"No… but I think you're being it." Adam said with a giggle.

"You're frustrating." Derek replied, giving Adam a scowl, who only grinned brighter.

"Maybe you're not ready for a girlfriend, Daddy." Adam sighed as Derek pulled into his sister's driveway and stopped the car, glancing back to his son.

"What is all of this about?" Derek asked as he glanced to the house and back at his son as he took off his seatbelt.

"Well… you shouldn't have a girlfriend because what if mommy comes back?" Adam asked, trying to think of exactly what Emma had said earlier.

"What?" Derek asked, turning completely around in his seat as he stared at Adam.

"Mommy… if she comes back." He shrugged. "Emma said that her mommy sometimes cries… and begs that her daddy will come back and take them with him." Adam replied. "So, maybe you and Meredith shouldn't go out on dates, not if mommy is coming back. She'd be disappointed if she came back and you had a girlfriend." He said as he turned and saw the house door open, and Derek's sister stepped out onto the porch. "There's Aunt Beth… I gotta go." He said as he leaned forward to his father's shocked face, and gave him a kiss, before swinging open the door, hopping out and running toward the door. He slipped past his aunt and into the doorway as Beth stood at the door looking out at her brother.

She watched as he just sat in his car, staring out at her for a moment, and she stepped down the stairs. He had been somewhat cryptic on the phone about where he was going, and so being the nosy sister that she was, she wanted to find out why. She approached the car and noticed that he hadn't even realized she was there. She even let out a little giggle when she knocked on the window and watched him jump. He looked to his side and his face relaxed as he opened the window. "What do you want?" He said in a teasing voice, watching the smirk rise on his sister's face when she noticed that he was dressed up slightly, a nice dress shirt and a tie, nothing too classy, but he was obviously going somewhere to impress.

"Someone has a date." She grinned as Derek shook his head and looked out the window.

"No… no, it's not a date." He lied as he smiled slightly at his sister, and she immediately noticed the sparkle in his eyes.

"Come on, Derek… I can smell your cologne from here." She teased, watching him give her a faux shocked look.

"You can not!" he exclaimed with a laugh as his sister let out a laugh.

"Who is the lucky lady?" She asked with a smile.

"How about I handle the date business… you handle the babysitting part… and if it works out, I'll let you know when I come back to get Adam." He said with a smile as Beth shook her head.

"You are so cute when you're nervous…little brother." She teased as Derek shook his head.

"Oh, keep it up, Beth…" He said with a laugh, watching her giggle.

"You be good now, Derek… make sure to wear protection." She teased.

"Beth!" Derek exclaimed as she stepped back and waved.

"Don't forget to tell her about your video collection… and your…"

"Thank you for watching Adam, bat breath…" Derek said, pre-empting her sarcastic diatribe and giggle fest.

"It's no problem… you'll be back around nine?" She asked, watching her brother nod as he smiled nervously, and backed out of the driveway, waving to her quickly as he drove down the road toward Meredith's place.

* * *

Derek spent the entire drive to Meredith's house thinking. He had read the directions carefully, though his mind was constantly on what his son had said before he ran at top speed from the car into his aunt's house. Derek pulled the car in the front of a brownstone and looked up at the building. One of the windows had small pink heart stickers stuck to it, and he smiled slightly as he thought of the little girl who lived there.

He very slowly got out of the car, looking to the ground as he closed his door, he looked up to the top of the steps to see the door closing and Meredith standing with her back against the door. He smiled at her, the look on her face showed that she was a bit flustered, and he watched as she blushed slightly upon him noticing her there. "I was going to come up and get you." He said softly as he walked around the car toward the steps.

"I know." She shrugged. "I thought I'd save you the trouble."

"The trouble?"

"My mother's in there… and Emma… and you know Emma, she'll see you and want to talk your ears off." Meredith said as she watched him walk slowly up the stairs toward her. "I don't need help, I can walk down the stairs by myself, I'm a big girl you know?"

"You talk a lot." He said as he reached her and took her arm tenderly.

"You…" She stopped as she blushed again and shook her head.

"You're nervous, I get it… our first date that doesn't involve plane food or hospital food… we're taking a big step here, Meredith… I mean, you don't know my taste. I could be taking you to some far east restaurant where they serve monkey brains and sheep intestine soup covered in…"

"Okay… I think I lost my appetite." She said as Derek chuckled and walked her to the car, where he opened the door for her.

"Good… then… more monkey brains for me." He teased as he helped her into the car, watching to make sure she was all the way inside, he listened to her giggle and he smiled. "Good… you brought that laugh that I requested." He said as he closed the door carefully and watched her smile through the glass, as he walked to the other side of the car.

He climbed into the seat and buckled his seatbelt as he watched her fingers pull the seatbelt around her. He glanced to her and smiled. "I feel underdressed." She whispered, referring to the blouse she was wearing, and the skirt that she had picked, that just about covered her knee brace.

"You're beautiful…"

"You're wearing a tie." She said as she watched him smile. He lifted his middle and forefinger up and slipped it behind the tie and tugged. "No! You look good in a tie."

"Nope… not going to wear the tie tonight… I want you to be comfortable." He said with a smile as he pulled the tie from around his neck and threw it into the back seat. "Better?" He asked as he listened to her giggle.

"I don't know." She said as she shook her head. "I think I liked the tie better." She said as she shook her head and looked back at the tie.

"I bet that I can dazzle you without a tie… I don't need a strip of fabric around my neck in order to be cool." He teased as she giggled and watched him turn the car on, and shift it into drive.

"Where are we going?" She asked, watching Derek smile.

"Look at this… first you insult me and my tie, and now you want to know where we're going? Patience is a virtue, my dear…" Derek teased as he drove, his hand moving to the center console where he held his hand palm up, his eyes on the road.

Meredith noticed his hand out of the corner of her eye and smiled to herself. She knew he was being slightly forward, but she also knew that she liked him. Smiling demurely, she moved her hand to the center console as well, and slipped her fingers into his hand, resting her palm against his, entwining their fingers. She couldn't ignore the tight feeling in her belly, and the butterflies that seemed to have taken up residence there, and neither could Derek.

Adam's words seemed to swirl around in Derek's mind as he drove, and he hadn't realized that he had become very silent on the ride, his mind taking control and his thoughts causing him to grip Meredith's hand tighter at some points, as she watched him carefully. "Derek?" She whispered as she squeezed his hand, his head snapping in her direction as his eyebrows rose just slightly. "You have something on your mind." She replied.

"No…" He dismissed it playfully, a smile playing at the corner of his lips as he continued to drive, his eyes glancing to her quickly before returning to the road. "Do you have something on your mind?" He asked as he felt her lift his hand, she leaned to her left slightly and kissed his fingertips.

"I have a lot on my mind." She replied. "You look nervous." She whispered, watching his eyes make the trip to hers more often since she kissed his hand.

"I'm not nervous." He said, a slight waver in his voice deceived his claim, and he smiled as he glanced to her again.

"You're nervous." She replied. "I can tell. I think it's cute."

"I'm not nervous." He replied.

"How long has it been since you went out on a date, Derek?" She asked inquisitively, playfully, her eyes sparkling as she looked out at the setting sun.

"It has been a while, I told you that." He replied.

"Like how long? A week? A year? Several years?" She asked.

"I… don't think it's relevant." Derek replied with a smile in her direction.

"I do… I went out on a date just earlier this week." She said with a giggle.

"Mark?" He laughed. "You're counting that as a date?" He asked as she giggled.

"Actually… I was talking about you… when you took me to the garden with the fountain, but now that you mention it… I did have a date with Mark too." She nodded as she sent Derek a wicked grin.

"I think we should go through the rest of the evening not mentioning that name… what do you say? I want to have a good time." He said as she rolled her eyes.

"Oh, Derek… he'll get over it. Once he realizes that you and I were destined to be together… We're 'sole mates'…" She said as she nodded at her feet. She listened to him laugh as he watched the road.

"That reminds me… I think that it's best… that while we date… you never, ever wear heels. You have the worst footwear control of anyone I have ever met. One of these days, you're going to jab someone's eye out, and it won't be pretty… not pretty at all." Derek teased as Meredith giggled.

"You never answered my question." She said as she watched Derek's focus remain out the windshield. "Come on, Derek… you're hiding from me here. You know a lot more about me than most of my friends know." She whispered. "Talk to me…"

Derek glanced to her as he shrugged. "You know… you remember where I was coming home from for Christmas that night we met?" He asked as she nodded her head and watched his eyes.

"Seattle." She replied.

"Yeah… two days before that? That was the last date I had… that was the last relationship that I had… and it didn't end well, and…" He stammered as he sighed.

"And we don't have to talk about it anymore." She shrugged, watching his eyes flash to hers again as he gave her a smirk. "I was just wondering… we don't have to discuss it anymore…" She whispered.

"Meredith?" Derek asked, squeezing his hand in his as she tilted her head forward. "I…went through a lot of… hours on a doctor's couch… I've tried medicine and even hypnosis to get through the pain I was feeling… I've had nightmares and frightening moments that… no one I have talked to seems to understand. Do you think…?"

"I understand." Meredith said without missing a beat, without taking a pause, she jumped on his question before he could even get it out from between his lips. "I understand what you… are… were… I want to understand more… because it's not exactly the same, but…"

"Do you feel comfortable calling this a date, Meredith?" He whispered as he pulled up to a restaurant and pulled into the parking space on the road. "Do you feel… confident enough to call this a date, do you feel detached… enough from the past to call this a date?" He whispered. "I need you here with me on this, Meredith… because if you're not all in it, then I need to know. We both stand to lose from this, and there's no sense jumping in feet first if we're going to be treading water."

"Derek…" Meredith whispered.

"You can say no, Meredith, this isn't pressure… this is just a question, and there is no judgment." He replied. "You were avoiding on the phone earlier… and when I got off the phone, I immediately felt guilty. If you're not ready, then I understand completely, if you're not…" Derek stopped as she reached across and put her hand over his mouth, watching his eyes widen slightly as he watched her smile a closed lip smirk.

"You're the one that talks a lot." She said with a giggle as she slipped her hand off his mouth and listened to him chuckle.

"Full circle." Derek whispered. "I see where you're going with this." He whispered.

"We're on a date, Derek Shepherd… and if you don't like it… you can bring me back home." She said with a smile as she watched his eyes sparkle as a smile appeared on his face.

"You're not going anywhere…" He whispered as he leaned across the car carefully, and touched her cheek with his hand. "Unless it's with me." He said, his voice low and raspy as his lips touched hers delicately and his thumb ran across her cheek. "Meredith... I…" He whispered.

"Love you." She finished his sentence, as he smiled against her lips, and kissed them once more in the colors of the orange-red sunset that filled the car.

* * *

Derek held Meredith's arm and helped her to their seat in the restaurant of Derek's choosing. The ambience was casual and comfortable; a soft tune of jazz played over the speaker through the restaurant as he pulled her chair out for her and helped her with her coat as he assisted her in pushing the chair in. He walked to the other side of the table and sat down, looking up at Meredith he watched as she smirked at him across the table. "What?" He asked as she shook her head, pulling the napkin from in front of her, she gently placed it on her lap.

"Nothing…" She said softly. "You are a genuine gentleman." She said softly.

"You say that as if you're surprised." He said with a smile, listening to her giggle.

"Not surprised that you're a gentleman... just that you're a gentleman all the time." She replied. "I'm just waiting for you to…"

"Fail? You're waiting for me to fail? How polite is that? If you ask me, that's not very lady like." He said as he winked at her, making her giggle.

"I never said fail." She laughed. "You said that. I was going to say… that I was waiting for you to drop your guard, so that I could do something for you." She said as she watched him smile.

"And that, would be a failure on my part, my dear." He said as he looked up at the waiter as he approached. Derek smiled and greeted him, as the waiter smiled and commented politely to the two of them that they were a lovely couple. He remarked that he could see the happiness in their eyes that they were there together, and he smiled as the young woman laughed softly and blushed. They made their orders and talked with the waiter for a few moments as he turned and made his way toward the kitchen to make their order. Meredith was talking happily about something, when she looked up and noticed that Derek was watching her so intensely, that it nearly made her jump. "What?" He asked as he watched her surprised look on her face, and watched her smile.

"You didn't hear a word that I said." She said softly as he grinned and laughed. He leaned slightly on the table and shook his head.

"You are wrong there, missy…" Derek said with a playful laugh. "You were telling me about how excited Emma was go get home… and how your mother saw her bedroom and how they cleaned your house without your permission." Derek replied.

"You were listening…" She said with a smile as he nodded.

"Of course." He said with a soft chuckle. "Just because I hear the lyrics, doesn't mean that I can't enjoy the tune." He said as he reached his hand across the table at her, and watched her blush as she reached her hands across to his. She allowed him to hold her hands in his, running his thumb delicately over her skin as he watched her. "You are so beautiful." He said softly as she smiled.

"Don't you ever turn it off?" she whispered.

"What?"

"The charm." She replied.

"Is it too much? Do I seem like I'm trying too hard? I just want you to have a good time, I want you to…" Derek started to stammer.

"Derek." She said, her voice was almost stern as she shook her head. "You're doing fine." She said as she squeezed his hand. "I'm having a good time… stop trying so hard to impress me… I'm impressed… I am… you're doing just fine." She insisted. "You're doing just fine." She smiled.

"You're sure?" He asked, swallowing nervously as she nodded and squeezed his hand again.

"You're doing perfectly." She giggled.

"Good." He replied with a laugh. "Then you won't object to a carriage ride in the park this evening beneath the stars." He whispered.

"I thought we were going to…"

"We are." Derek replied. "We'll get Adam, Emma… and your mother if she'd like to join us… and we'll take a carriage ride. I've already reserved it for ten o'clock. What do you say?" He asked as he smiled and watched her tilt her head.

"You reserved it?" She asked with a laugh.

"I did… and the best part…" he whispered as he leaned forward. "The driver is a friend of mine… and he says that the kids can sit in the front with him… he said he'll show them how to steer… and you and I can snuggle in the back… but only if you want to." He shrugged with a laugh as her eyes widened with a grin.

"What if I want to know how to steer the carriage?" She asked with a laugh as Derek gave her a surprised laugh.

"Oh… well, I could show you how to steer the carriage…" he laughed as he wiggled his eyebrows at her, making her laugh hard as she smacked his hand and tipped her head back as she gripped his hand in hers once again.

"You are so bad…" She laughed as he shook his head and chuckled nervously.

"I am not that bad…" He said with a smile, as they laughed together and enjoyed one another's company as the waiter delivered their appetizers and drinks.

* * *

Dinner was filled with laughter and good conversation, they enjoyed one another's company and jokes and were thoroughly entertained as they listened to the serene music playing over the speakers, and sipped at their glasses of wine as they finished their dinner. "… So then she tried to stay up all night long to see if she'd get a glimpse of the Easter bunny… and while she stayed awake, I fell asleep… and in the morning, she woke me up at six in the morning… and I hadn't hidden anything…" Meredith laughed.

"No way!" Derek exclaimed as the Meredith shook her head and laughed, reaching her hand across the table, she took his as she continued the story.

"Yes…" Meredith giggled. "So I had to roll the eggs in different places when she wasn't looking, and let her find them that way." She said as she watched Derek laugh. "We were still finding Easter Eggs when we moved out of my mother's house." She giggled as Derek kept his eyes on hers through the whole story, enjoying every moment that he had with her, his heart beating wildly with each giggle. "You're watching me so intently." She said softly as he nodded his head.

"Of course." He replied. "You are at the center of my attention." Derek replied. "You're the most important person in the room to me right now."

"Derek…" She shook her head as she blushed, his eyes taken from her as the waiter came to the table with their check. Derek pulled his wallet from his pocket as he placed his card in the sleeve and handed it to the waiter, as he nodded and walked away. "Derek, you don't have to keep trying so hard to make me smile, make me laugh… I feel like I'm not really getting to know the real you." She whispered.

"But you are." Derek said sincerely. "I'm always nice, polite, attentive… especially to people that I like." He whispered as he watched her smile, reaching for the check as the waiter approached their table. "And you deserve a nice night out. You've been wracking your brain for days with this stuff about Emma and her accident. You were hung up on seeing me again, and you're still in love with your husband, and you're trying desperately to rationalize that this is indeed a date, and you want to move on, but you have your doubts." He said as he watched the shock look on her face as she stared into his eyes. "Did I go too far?" He whispered as she nodded slightly. "Oh God… I'm sorry…" he whispered.

"No." She said as she cleared her throat and placed the napkin on the table, moving her eyes from his as she shook her head. "No, no… I mean… I mean you're right, you're right… the Emma thing has been on my mind, and of course seeing you again, and having you tell me that you love me…"

"I loved you before too, Meredith." Derek whispered. "It's been a lot longer for me to have had these feelings than it has been for you, and I understand that you're still grieving… it's been nearly seven years for me, and I'm still grieving. It's natural… and it's natural to cry at night, to have nightmares… and it's natural to not want to talk about it."

"I don't want to talk about it, Derek." She said as tears began to spring to her eyes.

"Oh… Meredith…" he said as he started to stand up. "I didn't want to make you cry." He whispered as she stood up and reached for her coat, only to have him reach the other side of the table and pull it from her fingertips as he tried to help her with it. "Meredith please?" Derek said softly as she pulled away further, letting him put her coat on her, but refusing to look into his eyes. "Meredith, please look at me." He said softly as she turned and looked at him, the hurt so evident in her eyes.

"What? What do you want to say to me, Derek?" She whispered, her voice was stern and he smirked at her letting his eyes glitter as he tried to maintain his cool appearance. "What are you smirking at?" She demanded.

"You're using your 'mommy' voice on me." He said as he watched her jaw drop, and a hint of a smile appear on her lips.

"I am not!" She exclaimed as she turned and grabbed his arm, letting him lead her from the restaurant.

"You did so… you used your 'mommy' voice on me, and now you're embarrassed about it." Derek teased as he felt her arm tighten on his as she pulled it suddenly and swung him to face her just as they reached the door.

"You… you…" She grunted as she tried to find the words as he watched her become flustered as he smiled at her, leaning down to kiss the tip of her nose. "You frustrate me." She whispered.

"In a good way, or a bad way?" He whispered.

"I don't know." She said as she let her voice become slightly pouty. "I guess it depends on how you take it…" She said as she leaned forward and suddenly hugged him, feeling him grip her tightly as he took a step back, surprised by her sudden emotional display. "Don't hate me because I'm an emotional mess." She whimpered as she gripped him tightly.

"I promise you that I could never hate you…" He whispered as he ran his fingers through her hair and held her close, kissing her head tenderly as he held her. "I promise." He whispered again as he gave her a little squeeze. "Let's go pick up the kids… we still have a carriage ride, and dessert before bed time." He whispered as she pulled away and looked into his eyes.

"Bedtime?" She asked, in a slightly surprised tone as she watched the smile on his lips as he grinned at her.

"I mean for the kids." He replied with a laugh. "Bedtime for the kids."

"For the kids." Meredith repeated, nodding her head.

"Yep… for the kids…" Derek nodded as he put his arm around her as they walked from the restaurant. He walked her toward the car and leaned his lips to her ear as he whispered. "I don't think you and I are going to be getting much sleep tonight." He said as he listened to her soft giggle against him, as she refused to lead his answer on any further.

* * *

Derek helped Meredith to the car, opening the door and ushering her inside, he watched her look up at him. "So at what point in the relationship do you stop opening doors for me?" She teased as Derek smiled and shrugged.

"When my arms fall off from doing it too much." He said with a laugh as she giggled, watching him give her a wink as he closed her door and walked around. He got into the driver's seat and smiled over at her. "Think of it as a perk of dating me, not a form of me taking your secret door closing powers away from you." He teased as she giggled.

"You're ridiculous." She laughed as he put the car into drive, and they made their way from the parking lot.

"Ridiculous? I don't think so… I'm thoughtful and loving, and a little bit cute. I take that back, I'm absolutely adorable." He said as he watched her looking to say something more. "And modest, I'm modest." He said as he listened to her giggle. "And maybe a little ridiculous." He replied as his cheeks blushed slightly.

"You're just nervous." She replied as she reached for his hand. "Don't worry, Derek… I'm not going to run. I mean… I can't… I need you to help me with the door." She teased as he laughed.

"You mock… you mock… why do you mock so?" He asked as he drove toward his sister's house, taking her hand in his as he entwined his fingers in hers.

"I mock because I love…" She said with a giggle, her own cheeks burning as she said the words, all in a game of cat and mouse, but ultimately touching his heart. "So we're going to get Adam?"

"We are…" He said as he pulled into the driveway of a small house, the porch light switching on as his car turned in, and he groaned as the door opened. "And that…" He mumbled as Beth stepped out onto the porch. "That is my sister… Beth." Derek said as he nodded toward the woman coming toward the car, a little boy running out of the house behind her as he started to get out of the car. "I'll be right back."

"Where are you going?" She asked with a giggle as she watched him stand in front of the door, blocking the window.

"Hey…" Beth said as she approached the car, peeking into the front window, she saw Meredith and grinned as her brother tried to block her.

"Hey." Derek said as he ushered his son toward the car. "Hey, buddy… did you have a good time?" Derek asked.

"Uhhuh…" He shrugged as he reached for the door. He climbed into the car and smiled when he saw Meredith. "Hi, Meredith." He said with the door still open, he looked up to see Derek raise his eyebrows. Adam rolled his eyes and climbed in, leaning forward to give Meredith a peck on the cheek, Derek could hear her talk to his son as he continued to block his sister from her view.

"Derek?" Beth giggled.

"What?" Derek asked as he leaned on the car. "Thank you for keeping an eye on him… um… he'll be at your house um… bright and early tomorrow… last day before my week off." Derek shrugged.

"Derek…" Beth shook her head and giggled.

"What?" He said innocently.

"Nothing…" She laughed. "Aren't you going to introduce me?" she asked as her eyes went to the opening door as Meredith pulled herself from the car. "Hi." Beth said as Meredith smiled across at her and stood awkwardly against the car.

"Hi." Meredith said with a smile as she glanced to the surprised look on Derek's face. "You forgot to lock it." She said as Derek laughed nervously as Beth walked around the car.

"Wait… Meredith?" Beth asked as she glanced to Derek and back to the woman standing against the door. "You mean… you're… 'the' Meredith…?" She asked as Derek rolled his eyes.

"That's enough, Beth." Derek replied as he watched his sister reach out to shake Meredith's hand. "Meredith, maybe you should sit back in the car…?" Derek said anxiously as Beth walked around the side of the car and noticed the knee brace.

"Oh… oh, you didn't have to get out…" Beth said as Meredith shook her head.

"Nonsense… if he had his way, I would never be able to open another door for myself again." She teased Derek as he shook his head and laughed.

"I'm his sister, Beth." Beth said with a smile as she leaned against Derek's car and smiled. "You know… resident babysitter, therapist, and anything else Derek needs at any specific time around here."

"Alright…" Derek said as Beth rolled her eyes.

"He's so touché." She said with a laugh as Meredith giggled. "I'm glad I was able to meet you, Meredith…" She said as she gave her brother a playful glare.

"It was nice to meet you, Beth." Meredith said as she watched Derek stand nervously on the other side of the car.

"Make sure he's a gentleman…" She said as she took a step back.

"Oh, you don't have to worry about that." Meredith giggled as Beth pointed at her brother.

"Behave, you two…" Beth said as she giggled.

"Bye, Beth." Derek said as he glanced to Meredith and started to walk around the car to help her inside.

"Don't forget you have a child with you…" Beth called.

"Get in the house, bat face." Derek called as Meredith smacked him just as he reached her.

"Derek!" She exclaimed as he laughed and looked back at Beth laughing.

"Term of endearment… get in the car, lady…" Derek said with a roll of his eyes.

"Hey, don't be so pushy…" Meredith teased as he helped her into her seat.

"Here…" Derek said as he reached for the door, popping the lock down. "Now you can't escape anymore…" He teased as she laughed, letting him lean down for a kiss on her cheek. "You all buckled in?" He asked as he looked back at Adam.

"Yeah." Adam said with a giggle.

"Good." Derek said as he glanced to Meredith. "Buckle up, lady… we don't go anywhere until you're buckled in…" He said as she laughed and reached for the seatbelt, buckling herself in just as Derek closed the door. He walked around the front of the car and glanced back to the house, as Beth shouted something to him that Meredith couldn't quite hear. She heard Derek laugh as he opened his door, waving to his sister as he climbed into the car. He buckled his seatbelt and glanced to her curious look as she watched him. "What?" He asked as he put the car into reverse to pull the car out of the driveway.

"Um…" She said softly as she giggled. "'The' Meredith?" She whispered.

"I knew you were going to ask about that." He said as he carefully pulled the car out into the road and put it into drive.

"And?" Meredith asked with a slight giggle.

"And… that's it…" He shrugged. "Doctor, sister confidentiality…" he teased as she let out a nervous laugh. "Don't worry, Meredith…" he whispered as he took her hand in his. "I have never spoken an ill word about you, ever." He said, as he looked into the rear view mirror at Adam, who was watching him with a curious look on his face. "Hey marshmallow head…" Derek said to the little boy who grinned brightly.

"Hey monkey brains!" Adam said with a giggle as Derek laughed.

"Are you ready for dessert?" Derek asked as the little boy nodded his head and smiled. "We were going to go pick up Emma… have a carriage ride in the park, and then stop and get an ice cream cone on the way back, what do you think?" Derek asked as Adam opened his mouth for a second and closed it.

"I'm not going to be Emma's boyfriend, Daddy." Adam said as he shook his head. "Sorry, Meredith." He replied.

"What?" Derek asked, glancing to the serious look on Adam's face as he drove.

"You want me to ride on the carriage with her and I know you're going to want to sit next to Meredith… I'm not going to be her boyfriend, she's a nice girl… it's not her, it's me…" Adam said quickly as Derek and Meredith exchanged a look with one another.

"Hey, I asked you if you wanted to go on the carriage and get ice cream… I didn't ask you to propose marriage." Derek teased.

"I'm not doing that either." Adam replied.

"Fine… fine, fine… how about you be her friend and help Kam drive the carriage, and me and Meredith will sit in the back and be boyfriend and girlfriend?" Derek asked.

"Are you going to kiss her?" Adam asked as he watched Derek's eyes as he gave his son a funny look.

"I may… is that any of your business?" He asked as Adam nodded.

"Yep… it's my business…" Adam giggled, settling into his seat as they drove toward Meredith's place.

* * *

Derek pulled the car up in front of Meredith's house, and put his hand on hers as he put the car in park. "I'll go get her." Derek said as he glanced into the back seat to his son. "Make sure she stays here… talk about something to keep her busy, distract her." He said as he listened to her giggle as she watched him climb from the car and jog up the stairs.

"Meredith… do you want to know a secret?" Adam asked as he watched her turn her head to look at him, a smile on her face as she watched the little boy's blue eyes implore her.

"Sure…"

"Daddy snores." He said with a giggle as Meredith laughed a little at the boy's wrinkled nose, his secret tickling his funny bone as he covered his mouth with his hand.

"He does?"

"Uh huh, really loud…" Adam laughed.

"Well, that's okay… I do too…" Meredith nodded as Adam gigged again.

"Meredith?" Adam said softly as he tilted his head.

"Another secret?" Meredith asked as Adam shook his head.

"No." He said softly. "Do you think that my mommy is going to come back for me and daddy?" he asked, as he watched Meredith's head snap in his direction.

"What?" She asked as Adam watched her curiously.

"Do you think my mommy is going to come back for me and daddy? You said that you want Emma's daddy to come back… if he comes back, do you think my mommy will come back?" He asked as he watched Meredith's face turn pale. Her jaw opened and closed as her eyes became unfocused and she stammered a bit. "Meredith?" Adam asked.

"Adam…" She mumbled as she turned her head to see Derek bouncing down the stairs with a giggling Emma as he kissed her cheek and whispered something to her as she let out a happy laugh as they reached the car. He looked in the passenger seat and saw the stunned look on Meredith's face, and cursed in his mind as he approached the car.

"What is he up to…?" Derek whispered as he lifted the little girl to the ground. He took her hand and opened the back door to the car, watching Adam's eyes meet his as he helped Emma into the car. "Hey… so did you keep her distracted?" He asked as Adam nodded his head slowly, his eyes moving back to Meredith as he watched Emma buckle up and his eyes moved to Meredith. He noticed her try to wipe a tear from her eye without him seeing. "Adam?"

"I didn't mean to." He whispered as Derek gave him a glare. "Meredith, are you alright?" Derek asked as she nodded and sniffled, trying to remain composed.

"I'm fine." Meredith nodded. "I'm fine, just… I'm just starting to get a little tired." She said as she looked back at Emma. "Hey there sweet pea." She said with a smile as Emma watched her mother carefully.

"Did you make my mommy cry, Adam?" Emma asked as Adam looked at her innocently.

"I didn't say nothing! I didn't do nothing…" He said innocently.

"Well…" Derek mumbled as he watched Meredith shake her head as she watched him. "Let's get to dessert, we'll talk about this later." He said as Adam nodded his head. "All buckled in?" Derek asked Emma, who nodded her head and gave him a smirk as he winked at her and closed the door. "Off we go!" He said as he walked around the car and opened his door. He got into his seat and closed the door behind him, letting his eyes pass to Meredith as she turned her head to meet his glance halfway.

"I'm fine, Derek." She said as she nodded her head. "I promise."

"You're not." He whispered as he reached for her hand and tilted his head. "But that's okay." He whispered, as he held her hand and pushed her hand with his on the shifter, as he pulled the car slowly from the parking space, feeling her hand squeeze against his, as they made their way toward the park together.

* * *

The drive to the park was in relative silence, though Derek did look to the back seat to see that Adam was whispering with Emma, who would occasionally giggle and look up at his eyes, she'd smile and look down with a bashful expression as he smiled back at her. "What are they doing back there?" Meredith asked as she looked into the back seat, having seen Derek smile into the mirror for a fifth time since they had been on their way, she laughed as her daughter tilted her head at her and she looked up at Derek. "My mother didn't want to come with us?" She asked.

"She said she'd rather keep in contact with the hospital." Derek replied. "I offered to let her help drive the carriage, but she wasn't impressed." Derek shrugged. "Apparently, she'd rather run a surgical wing of a hospital. How boring." Derek teased with a chuckle as he glanced into the back seat at his son, who as again looking out the window longingly. "Hey… why the long face?" He asked as Adam looked up at his father.

"No reason, just looking outside." He shrugged as he looked back toward the window. Derek looked to Meredith, who shrugged slightly and watched Derek do the same. Derek drove toward the park and pulled into a parking space. Derek pulled his seatbelt off and looked into the back seat.

"Stay in the car until Meredith and I are out, please." He said to Adam, who had grabbed hold of the handle. His father's words made him sigh as he rolled his eyes and sat back, watching Emma giggle slightly at him as he smiled and watched his father climb from his seat and move around the car quickly. He opened the door and held his hand out for Meredith. Meredith thanked him and took his hand, allowing him to carefully help her from the car and to her feet. He then leaned forward and kissed her gently on her cheek. "I will be with you in just a moment." He whispered as she nodded, watching him turn and open the back door, where he held out his hand again. "My little lady…" he whispered softly as he watched the smile on the little girl's face light up her eyes as she reached for him and let him help her from the car. "Adam?" He said as the little boy nodded, sliding across the seat, he hopped out and looked up at Meredith and over at Emma. "Will you take Emma's arm?" He asked as he hooked Meredith's in his.

"Daddy…" He said in a warning tone as Derek shook his head.

"Adam." He replied in the same warning tone, though he watched Adam hook Emma's arm in his. "Now we're on our way…" he said with a smile as he nodded toward Adam, who moved forward and walked in front of Meredith and Derek with Emma, as the four of them made their way down the sidewalk.

They turned into the park, the lights showing them their way as Meredith shivered slightly against Derek. "Are you cold?" He whispered as she shook her head and looked up into his eyes.

"That wasn't a cold shiver." She whispered as she watched his eyes light up with his smile.

"Meredith, you're too much…" He whispered, listening to her giggle as they reached the small stable where a man was standing beside a carriage, carefully grooming the horse.

"Doctor Shepherd…" The man standing beside the horse said with a smile and a nod as Derek approached them.

"Kamil." Derek said with a smile. "Meredith, this is Kam, he's our tour guide…" He winked. "He's a good friend from several years ago… said he owed me a favor, and I guess this makes us even, huh?" He asked with a laugh.

"Doctor Shepherd, you saved the life of my wife… you can have as many carriage rides as you please for the rest of your life." He said as he smiled, looking down at Adam. "Mister Adam, you have a lovely date this evening."

"Kam, she's not my date… she's Emma… she's practically my sister…" He said with a roll of his eyes.

"I'm not even close to being your sister." Emma said as she elbowed him slightly in his side as the little boy scoffed.

"Jerk…" Adam said as Derek reached forward and covered his son's mouth with his hand. "Kam… This is Meredith…" he said as he nodded toward Meredith, who giggled at the little boy's struggle against his father's hand for a moment. As Kamil lifted Meredith's hand to his lips and kissed it softly.

"Meredith, it is a pleasure. Any friend of Dr. Shepherd's is a friend of mine." He said with a smile as his brown eyes sparkled in the lights. "Are we ready for our carriage ride?" He asked as Emma nodded emphatically, looking up between Derek and Kamil as they approached the carriage. Her grin was so bright and happy. She watched Derek step up to the carriage and turn around to Meredith, who wasn't expecting him to pull her to him quickly. She squealed slightly at his motion and giggled when he lifted her into his arms.

"What are you doing?" She squeaked.

"Shh…" he whispered as he walked up the portable steps and lifted her into the carriage with him, listening to her soft giggle the entire way as he rested her on the seat in the back. He glanced back at the kids and Adam rolled his eyes and crossed his arms as he looked back to Meredith. "You better watch it…" He said softly. "Someone short, that looks similar to me… is very jealous of you." He said as he pulled the blanket from behind her and watched her tilt her head and look into his eyes as he unfolded it.

"Adam?" She asked as Derek nodded his head.

"He's been acting weird since yesterday… don't worry, he's just adjusting… he'll be alright." He whispered as he covered her lap with the blanket. "Alright." He said a little louder. "All cuddled in… now it's time for the little ones…"

"I am not little!" Adam exclaimed as Derek climbed carefully from the carriage and hopped off the last step, standing in front of his son.

"Don't raise your voice." Derek said, his eyebrow lifting as he watched Adam look to the ground. He turned and watched Kam carefully climb into the carriage.

"Doctor Shepherd… you can lift them up, I'll tell them where they can sit." Kam said as he held his hands out to Derek, who very carefully lifted Emma into his arms. He kissed her cheek gently and watched her smile as he handed her over.

"Be careful with that one, Kam… she's a charmer…" He said as Emma watched Derek smile at her, and Kam set her carefully on the seat beside him.

"And Mister Adam." Kam said as he held his hands out, watching Derek reach for his son.

"Don't lift me up… I can climb into the carriage myself." He said with a grumpy grunt as he moved away from his father and climbed up the steps, hauling himself precariously into the carriage, he allowed Kam to lift him over the seat to his other side. Kam and Derek exchanged a look, and Derek glanced to Meredith as he reached down and pulled the steps away from the side of the carriage. He then gripped the spoke on the side of the carriage and lifted himself effortlessly inside, as Kam smiled.

"You're a natural." Kam laughed as Derek settled into the seat next to Meredith.

"Thanks…" Derek said with a laugh, his arm moving instantly around Meredith as he caught the glare from his son sitting beside Kam. "Adam…?" Derek said as the little boy turned his head. "Adam, are you okay?"

"I'm fine." Adam mumbled as he turned his head and looked out to the horses, his posture sinking as he crossed his arms over his chest.

Derek kissed Meredith's cheek and shook his head, as the carriage ride began slowly, and soon they were on their way through the carefully lit park together.

* * *

The night was cooler than it had been for a few weeks, so Derek took it as a welcome opportunity to make himself very comfortable with his arm around Meredith while she cuddled in the provided blanket. They sat back on the seat, watching Kam as he instructed the two children, giving them each their own smaller reign as he held the primary reign in his hands, directing the horses down the path.

"Adam?" Derek said from behind, watching his son's eyes meet his for a moment as the smile on his lips fell slightly. "Are you cold?"

"No, I'm fine." Adam replied with a nod as he turned his attention back to the horses and asked Kam a question as he smiled once more.

"I'm not cold, neither, Derek." Emma said with a bright smile to Derek, watching as his concerned expression changed to a smile.

"Good." Derek said softly as he settled back and turned his head to Meredith, watching her stare at him. "What?" He whispered.

"You don't have to be so worried, Derek. They're fine." She said as she put her hand on his arm, rubbing it softly.

"I just wanted to make sure." Derek replied. "He doesn't always tell me when he's cold. He tries to tough it out or something."

"Then that's fine." Meredith said softly as they watched the two kids as Emma asked what the names of the horses were, and Kam went on a lengthy explanation of their names and why he called them such.

"Meredith?" Derek whispered as he watched her eyebrows arch slightly as she tilted her head. "Thank you for going out with me tonight." He said softly as he watched her smile shyly.

"I'm having a wonderful time." She said softly.

"I know… now you are, but I kind of pushed you into it, and I'm sorry if that made you feel rushed or something, you know? I mean… I know that you were probably trying to think of a good reason to decline, but I'm so glad that you didn't. I'm having more fun tonight than I've had in a long time."

"I'm having a good time too, Derek." She said softly as she squeezed his hand. "Now stop being so charming. I'm trying very hard here to find something wrong with you." She replied as Derek gave her a half smirk.

"You're trying to find things wrong with me?" He asked with a chuckle.

"Yes." She replied with a slight giggle. "If there's something wrong with you, then when I flake out on you, I don't have to feel guilty and so far, you've given me no good reasons to flake out on you." She said as he tipped his head back slightly and laughed. His laughter spilled over into the front as the two children looked back at them.

"Daddy." Adam said as he watched Derek's eyebrows rise. "Hush…"

"Hush?" Derek asked as Emma nodded and glanced to Kam.

"Kam is trying to let us listen to the crickets, and you guys are laughing too hard… Hush, please…" Emma said as Derek pretended to zip his lips and lock them, throwing away the key. "Good boy." She said with a smile as they turned around and listened as the horses slowly pulled them.

Derek glanced to Meredith with his pursed and 'locked' lips, and tried to keep himself from laughing. She grinned at his attempt and could hear his laughter start to slip from his lips. She tried not to giggle as she leaned forward and put her hand over his mouth, tipping her head forward to rest on his shoulder as she started to laugh into it. He made a sound against her hand, sending droplets of spittle on her hand as she screeched and pulled her hand away. "You licked me!" She screeched with a laugh as Derek began to laugh harder.

"I did not lick you! I did not lick you!" Derek laughed as Meredith giggled and wiped her hand on his cheek as he defended himself and laughed.

"You did so! My hand is all wet! Ick! Ick!" She exclaimed as she moved away from him laughing as they giggled together and then suddenly, she felt a nudge on her arm as she looked at him, watching him nod toward the front, noticing three sets of eyes on them as they straightened up and tried desperately not to laugh. Derek was holding onto his laughter until he felt himself be nudged by Meredith again, so he nudged her back.

"Now I am confused." Kam said as he glanced to the two children. "Who are the children here?" He asked with a knowing smirk as Meredith let a grin escape from her lips as she desperately tried to remain serious.

"She started it." Derek said with a grin as Meredith elbowed him.

Emma and Adam both rolled their eyes as Emma looked up at Kam. "Just keep driving… maybe they'll fall asleep…" She said with a smile as Kam chuckled and nodded, continuing the ride.

"I think we just got dissed…" Derek said as Meredith gave him a funny look.

"Dissed?"

"Disrespected…"

"I know what that means…" Meredith giggled as she pushed herself into his arms a little more, cuddling up to him even more. "I just didn't think that anyone said it anymore…" She said with a laugh, as Derek chuckled and held her tightly, as they quieted and listened to the sounds of the crickets.

* * *

The carriage slowed in front of a series of shops, a small enclave that was designed for the horse carriages to pause without being on the sidewalks had been installed here, and Kam stopped in the spot to let the horses rest and get them some water, while his riders shifted and prepared to get themselves a cold treat at the ice cream shop across the street.

"You guys can all stay here…" Derek said softly. "I'll go get the ice cream and bring it back." He said with a smile as Meredith shook her head.

"I can go with you." She said as she sat up, watching Derek shake his head.

"Rest… rest your knee… watch the kids… talk with Kam. I'll get you your ice cream." He said with a smile.

"Can I go with you, Daddy?" Adam asked as Derek watched him squirm slightly in his seat as he tilted his head.

"You stay here with Meredith. You and Kam have to make sure they're safe and sound while I'm getting the ice cream." Derek said as Adam sighed. Derek took everyone's order and walked across the street quickly toward the ice cream shop.

Adam turned his head and glanced to Meredith. "Meredith, I'm going to go with daddy." He said as he started to shift toward the edge.

"Adam." Meredith said as she held her hand out to him, watching him try to slide to the edge of the carriage, she touched his arm. "Stay here with me… you heard what your daddy said." She said as Adam glanced at her and back at Derek.

"But…" He mumbled as he sighed.

"You heard what he said, Adam… he's in charge." Meredith said as Adam sighed and sat back, sliding down, he sulked as he stared at the ice cream shop that his father had slipped into.

"M-dawg would let me go." Adam mumbled as he sighed.

"M-dawg?" Emma asked. "You have a dog?"

"No… not a real dog… like… a friend… I'm his wing man…" Adam said as he gave Emma a confused look.

"Wing man?" She asked. "You're weird."

"I am not weird!" Adam exclaimed as he sat up. "You're ugly!" He shouted.

"Adam!" Meredith exclaimed.

"She called me weird!"

"Emma… no name calling." Meredith scolded as she leaned back against the back of the carriage and sighed.

"They fight like siblings." Kam said as he chuckled at the two children scowling at one another. "Have you and Doctor Shepherd been dating long?" He asked as Meredith's eyes met with the man's kind eyes.

"This is… actually, our official first date… but we've been friends… for a little while." She said, trying to carefully broach the subject without making it too complicated.

"Ah…" Kam chuckled as he watched the children continue to scowl at one another. "Well, I grew up with four brothers and three sisters." He said with a nod. "Their relationship is very normal… It's when they work together when you should be most nervous." He said as Meredith giggled.

"I'll keep that in mind." She said as she glanced over at the road, as she watched Derek emerge with a holder in his hands with four ice cream cones, and one in his hand that he crossed the street and approached them, with a smile on his face.

* * *

The ice cream had all been eaten, and somehow, the little girl who had fancied holding her very own bridle in the front of the carriage had ended up cuddled in Derek's arms, her eyes drooping sleepily as he adjusted the bandage on her head slightly. Her mouth opened wide as a yawn seemed to lift from deep within her, her hand covering it quickly as she pushed her head into Derek's arm.

"Are we ready to go?" Kam asked as Derek watched the little girl, whose eyes closed and her hand clasped over his.

"I think we're ready to go…" Meredith said as she watched Adam look back at his father, his eyes filled with an immature jealousy that rang out in his head, turning swiftly toward the front.

"Let's get out of here." He said with a huff as he sighed, swinging the bridle in his hand slightly as he tried to block out the image in his head of what he was beginning to feel to be his father's overt display of attention to the two women that were sitting with him.

"Adam?" Meredith said softly as she attempted to quell the tension that she could feel radiating from the body of the little boy, shown in his words and his actions.

He turned his head to face her and he tipped his head, his eyes moving to his father's, where he was met with a curious expression, and not one of frustration that he had expected. "Huh?" He said as Kam prepared the horses to return them to where they had begun their journey.

"Would you like to sit back here with us?" She asked, watching him mull over the idea of climbing into the back, cuddling amongst the group of people that was creating this feeling of resentment in his heart, his mind, his stomach.

"Um…" He mumbled as his eyes moved to his father's once again, as he shook his head. "No, its okay, Meredith…" Adam said with a shrug. "I'll stay up here." He replied. "Thank you, though. Kam needs help." He nodded. "And you guys look comfy."

"I'd be much more comfy if I had someone to snuggle with." Meredith said as Adam turned his head to look at her, his eyes moving to his father and back to Meredith.

"You can snuggle with daddy." Adam shrugged as he turned to look forward. Suddenly, Meredith leaned forward, reaching her hands around his waist, he let out a giggle filled squeal as she pulled him toward her. "Meredith!" He exclaimed as she slid him from the bench and pulled him into her lap, being careful not to let him hit her leg, he giggled madly as she wrapped her arms around him and kissed his cheek, feeling his hand come up to wipe it off, she started to tickle him.

"You wiped off my kiss?" She asked with a laugh. "You wiped off my kiss! So mean! So mean!" She exclaimed as she kissed him again and again as he wiggled and squealed, laughing the entire time as she stopped tickling him, and he sat in her lap breathless and giggling slightly.

"Meredith, you're so silly…" He said with a laugh as he turned his head and looked up at her.

"Are you going to wipe off my kisses again?" She asked as he shook his head and grinned at her. "Are you going to snuggle with us back here?" She asked as he nodded and giggled, his eyes glancing to Derek as he watched the happiness in his son's face.

"Yeah…" He said as he reached his hand up to his cheek, watching Meredith's eyes as she raised her eyebrows, and moved his hand quickly to her cheek. He leaned up and kissed her nose. "You can't wipe mine off neither." He said quickly as he watched her smile. "It's a rule."

"It's a very good rule." She said with a nod as Adam giggled as he looked over to Kam as he prepared for them to leave. Kam turned his head and smiled at the four of them all snuggled in the back of his carriage, a grin rising to his lips as he watched Derek smirk.

"I see that you are all ready to go…" He said softly as Derek nodded.

"We're all ready to go." He said with a nod, glancing to Meredith, who smiled slightly back at him, watching as he pulled one of his hands from around her daughter, he put his arm around her shoulder as he pulled her into him, snuggling both her, and his son as well.

"Snug as a bug in a rug." Adam replied as he yawned suddenly, closing his eyes as he nestled into Meredith, and they were on their way once again.

* * *

The carriage pulled into it's space, and the four in the back were cuddled together perfectly as the two smallest of the group found themselves sleeping soundly against their companion's chests. Kam turned as he climbed from his perch, looking back quickly at the foursome in the back, smiling at Derek who gave him a sheepish grin.

"You are as good a father as you are a doctor, Doctor Shepherd." He said as Derek chuckled softly against the hair of the little girl who nuzzled farther into his neck.

"You talk too much, Kam." Derek said with a laugh as he began to sit up slightly, glancing to Meredith as she watched Derek hold her daughter so tenderly, as if she were as light as a feather. "Are you going to stay here all night?" He asked with a smirk and a wink as she shook her head.

"I'm sort of weighed down here." She teased, as Derek laughed and stood, climbing carefully from the back of the carriage, he turned on the top step.

"Here…" He said, watching his son grip Meredith tighter with his hands, his eyes closed, his breathing still soft as he grip her with the strength of a baby gripping its mother for fear of it leaving. It made Derek's heart beat a little faster when he watched his son's lips curled in a sleeping smile as he continued to hold the woman who held him, and he lifted his eyes to hers, where his own happiness was reflected in her eyes. "Slide… slide over in this direction, and I'll lift him from your arms."

"But you already have Emma." She said as she tilted her head and shook it.

"I can handle both… trust me… slide over and hand him to me… he won't even wake up, I promise…"

"He wont wake up? Derek…"

"The kid could sleep through a nuclear attack… trust me…" He said as he nodded. "Slide… and hand him over…" He said as Derek watched Meredith start to slide down the seat.

"If I hand him to you…" Meredith said softly. "Who is going to help me down?" She asked with a giggle as Derek rolled his eyes and laughed.

"Fine… drop him…" Derek said as he watched Meredith's jaw drop.

"Derek!" She squeaked, feeling Adam shift in her arms, she shook her head as she felt her cheeks burn "Derek…" She whispered, a soft growl as Derek laughed.

"Just hand him over…" he said with a laugh, as Meredith leaned forward, feeling Derek's arms wrap around the little boy, she carefully peeled his hands from her shirt, feeling Adam turn subconsciously and grip Derek, resting his head on Derek's shoulder, gripping his shirt as she watched him grip him tightly, and Emma, on one hand, all the while holding his arm out for her. "Okay, your turn." He said as Meredith raised her eyebrows. "Hurry, hurry…" he said with a chuckle as Meredith reached for his hand and gripped it tightly, pulling herself from the carriage, she stepped down onto the step and let him help her down, as she looked up at him, releasing his hand, he shifted Adam into his other arm. He glanced to Kam and back to Meredith as she looked up at him.

"What?" She whispered as Derek watched Kam tying up the horses, preparing to get them some water.

"My back pocket… wallet… can you…"

"You want me to pull your wallet out of your back pocket? Derek… that's kind of a second or third date thing, don't you think?" She teased as Derek gave her a surprised look.

"Just pull the wallet out, will ya?" he asked as she laughed, and reached in his back pocket. "Oh!" He squeaked teasing her.

"What?" She asked.

"Oh, don't you pretend that you didn't just pinch my butt…" Derek teased as Meredith's jaw went slack for the second time in the past three minutes. He laughed as she blushed, and shook his head. "Pull a twenty out… hand it to Kam. If he says he won't take it… hide it in the bridle of the horse." Derek whispered.

Meredith nodded and walked toward Kam. He watched her talk to him for a moment, watching Kam shake his head, pushing her hand from him as he glanced to Derek and shook his head.

"Your money is no good with me, Doctor Shepherd!" He exclaimed with a grin, as Meredith shrugged.

"Alright… Let's go Meredith... Kam is just too proud…" Derek said as Meredith smiled and walked toward him.

"And don't you dare slide that twenty dollars in the bridle Miss Grey…" Kam said as Meredith's eyes closed and she started to laugh as Derek chuckled, sliding a twenty dollar bill under the seat of the carriage as he nodded toward Meredith.

"Thank you, Kamil!" Derek exclaimed as he nudged Meredith as they walked toward the car.

"Bye, Kamil! Thank you!" Meredith called as she waved to the man beside the horse, as she caught up with Derek. "How is he going to find that?" She whispered as she walked alongside Derek.

"Oh, he'll find it." Derek said as he nodded with a laugh. "Probably find it on my doorstep tomorrow morning, but he'll find it."

"He'd actually return it?" She asked as they reached the car, and Meredith reached for the door handle, opening the car door so that Derek could slide the children into the back seat and get them buckled.

Derek stood up and glanced to her, having buckled the two sleepy children in the car, he smiled and faced her. "He will." Derek nodded. "He's a good man…" He said as he opened her car door for her and held his hand out. "And speaking of returning things?" he said with a sly grin that send a bright grin across her own face, and a loud laugh emitted from deep within her throat.

"What? You don't trust me?" She laughed as she slapped his wallet into his hand and grinned at him brightly.

"More than you know, Ms. Grey…" Derek said as he lifted her hand to his lips and kissed it tenderly.

"More than you should, Mister Shepherd…" She said as she smirked at him and climbed into the seat, watching his eyes smile brightly, as he shook his head and closed her door for her, he laughed and turned, sliding his wallet into his back pocket as he headed for the driver's side.

* * *

Derek drove the car slowly through the streets, never wanting the evening to end, but knowing that it would have to, if only because he had one more day of work before his week vacation. He pulled the car up to the brownstone and parked directly in front of it, looking across the passenger seat to the stairs.

"So we're here." Meredith sighed softly as she glanced out the window, turning her eyes to look to Derek, who had a seemingly lost look in his eyes.

"Yep." He said, his voice wistful and sad as he gave her a supportive smirk, though the sadness in his eyes gave away his feelings.

"You have work tomorrow, huh?" She asked as she watched Derek nod his head. "Mom's leaving tomorrow afternoon." She said, watching him still nodding.

"She is probably missing a lot of work."

"Yeah." Meredith nodded. "She um… she works a lot."

"I'm aware." Derek said with an awkward pause that both of them could feel radiating between them.

"I um… I should go now, I guess… get her to bed." She said, nodding to the back seat, where the two kids sit sleeping, their seatbelt straps holding them upright as they snored softly.

"Probably… yeah… she's had a long day." Derek replied as he watched Meredith's eyes, watching her pause and smile softly at him. "I hope that we can have a lot more dates like that." He whispered. "It's nice to have a family again." He whispered as they both paused again, as if they weren't sure what to say next, what to do next, perhaps even forgetting to breathe for a couple of seconds as suddenly, Meredith turned and grabbed the door handle.

"Well, then… um, then thanks… it was a lovely evening. Thanks." She said quickly as she pulled at the handle as if she were trying to get away, as if she were trying to escape. She was feeling awkward and nervous, overwhelmed and almost frightened by the heart pounding feeling that Derek seemed to send through her veins, and she felt like she couldn't breathe. She yanked hard on the door handle, pushing her body against it, she nearly slammed her head into the door when she realized that the door hadn't opened, but instead was locked because the car was still in gear.

"Meredith…" Derek said as he put the car in park and reached across and touched her arm, watching as she flipped the lock quickly and nearly jumped from the car. "Meredith, hang on a second…" Derek said as he watched her slide out of the car and close the door at his grasping hand, flustered and full of anxiety, Derek climbed out of the driver's side as Meredith opened the back door.

"Emma bear… come on, sweetheart… let's go." Meredith said, tugging at her daughter lightly as she unbuckled her seatbelt, trying to ignore Derek from beside her. "Let's go baby…"

"I'm sleepy…" Emma mumbled as her mother fumbled with her seatbelt, trying to lift her from the car. "Mama…" she groaned as Meredith started to move backwards, her heel hitting the curb beside the car, sending her tumbling backwards as she felt the set of strong arms around her holding her and her daughter upright.

"You didn't expect that to happen, did you?" He asked as his lips found their way to her ear as she gripped her daughter tightly in her arms and tried to will herself from his arms.

"I have to go inside." She whispered as she felt a lump in her throat.

"Meredith…" Derek whispered as he held her tightly, refusing to let her go.

"Derek, just let me go… I have to go inside." She said as she felt the tears coming to her eyes as she struggled to keep from crying.

"Mama…" Emma whimpered as she tried to wake up, feeling her mother's arms around her tightly, she looked up to see her mother's eyes filling with tears. "Don't cry." She whispered as her eyes lifted to Derek's as a look of confusion mixed with disappointment filled his features. Derek took a step back, helping Meredith to her feet, he quickly reached for Emma and pulled her quickly from Meredith's arms.

"Derek, don't do this!" She exclaimed suddenly as he ignored her request and pulled her arm up, helping her turn around. He said nothing as he walked with her toward the stairs, holding her daughter safely in his arms, he helped them up the stairs, where he watched her pull her keys quickly from her pocket, reaching for her daughter, she refused to look up into his eyes as he handed her over with a tender kiss to her brow. "Thank you for the wonderful evening." She said to his chest, before turning as she slammed the key into the lock and pushed her way inside. She grabbed her key from the lock as she held the door half opened, tugging on it hard, because it wouldn't give.

Derek reached forward and touched her hand, watching her pull it back quickly as he very gingerly pulled the key from the lock and handed it to her. She grabbed the key from his hand and slammed the door with a mumbled 'thanks', leaving him standing, staring at the green painted wooden door, as his mind tried to catch up with his eyes and figure out exactly what he had done wrong.

* * *

Meredith stood with her back against the door for several moments, the tears in her eyes were threatening to fall at full throttle as she held Emma securely in her grip. The little girl turned her head to face her mother, seeing the tears in the corner of her eyes, the fear in her face as she held her against her. "Mama, why did you close the door on Derek?" She whispered as Meredith turned her face away from her little girl and caught her reflection in the mirror beside the door, her eyes reflecting a deep, dark fear, an emptiness that she had seen before in her eyes. She closed them quickly and let Emma slip from her grip slowly, setting her carefully to the floor.

"Go on up to your room, sweet pea." Meredith managed to squeak as Emma gripped her mother's shirt at the hem, looking up at her curiously.

"Mama, why did you close the door on Derek?" She asked again, turning, she reached for the doorknob and her mother's hand covered hers.

"Emma, upstairs… now." She said, her voice no longer soft and lost, but hardened and serious. The tone she used meant business, and Emma, though absolutely confused about the entire situation knew that now was not the time to argue with her mother. She took a step back and pulled her hand delicately from Meredith's.

"I am gonna see if Gma is awake." She whispered as she turned and ran quickly toward the stairs.

"Emma, do not run!" Meredith exclaimed, her hand reaching out as she watched her daughter slow down at the stairs, taking them one step at a time, her eyes watching her mother with each step she took until she disappeared on the landing.

She took this moment to turn against the door, resting her forehead against the wood, she held her hand to the white paint that covered it, the smooth texture beneath her fingertips was cold to the touch, her heart beating wildly as she felt the lump in her throat rising into a sob. The words that had escaped Derek's lips echoed in her mouth, the same words her husband had spoken before he had left for work that day, the last day that she had seen him alive. She was falling in love with Derek Shepherd, and while her mind could not deny that fact, she was not about to allow her heart to accept it, not with the possibility of losing him. She had loved and lost, and was certain in her mind that she would never be able to allow herself to play that game again.

* * *

Derek stood staring at the door, the overwhelming urge to bang his fist into it until it opened began to rise in his soul, but the moment he raised his fist to the door, was the moment he realized that there was no amount of pounding that would convince her otherwise. They had experienced a magical night, cuddling, talking, laughing. Their dinner had been perfect, the carriage ride superb, but there was something missing. Something missing besides the woman that had been by his side all evening. There was no shortage of care between them, he had made sure that she was as comfortable as possible, and she had shown him that she was conscious of his feelings and contented nature. There was no shortage of expression, she had returned each kiss, each hand hold, each stare, and he had done the same. There had been no awkward moments, there had been no lost or confused stares between them. There was no shortage of love, for even when she wouldn't vocalize her feelings, he could see it in her eyes. When he held her daughter in his arms, when he teased her about the bit of ice cream on her nose, when she had slapped his wallet into his hand and gave him that wide, beautiful grin. He could see the love. He could feel the love. He just knew that there was something missing, and he wished he knew where to find it.

He turned his head to see the car sitting in its spot, running as it sat with his son in the back seat, most likely still asleep, and he sucked in a deep breath, put one foot in front of the other and made his way toward the car. He climbed into the driver's seat and looked into the back, seeing his little boy's face, his puckered mouth open slightly as his black eyelashes twitched as he dreamed. He swallowed back his tears, his eyes moving back toward the green door in the distance, as he looked up to see a light turn on upstairs, illuminating the tiny pink hearts on the windows. "Goodnight Emma bear." He whispered as he chewed his lower lip for a moment. "Goodnight, Meredith." He whispered, as he put the car into gear and drove from her brownstone, with the sinking feeling in his stomach that he was leaving his family behind.

* * *

Derek's car pulled into the driveway slowly, his eyes moving to the sleeping boy in the back seat once more as he slipped the car into park and pulled the key from the ignition, sitting in the silence of the front yard as his son's gentle snoring wafted from the back seat. He felt guilty about having to wake the little boy, but knew that it had to be done, bed was a few long strides away and he probably wouldn't even notice that he was being moved.

He watched the little boy's chest rise and fall with each breath, his own chest tightening as he thought of the innocent heart that lie within his tiny frame, his tender temperament, his brave and trusting, vulnerable nature, and the fear that lie within his own heart that his son's innocence and trust could be stricken so hard and so sharply, that it could shatter it into a million unrecognizable pieces.

He clenched his jaw, and within his fear, anger began to run through his veins, and though he tried his hardest to push it as far down into his soul as possible, the thought of someone taking his boy's innocence was too much for him to bear. He opened his door quickly and quietly, securing it without a slam as he moved to the back door. He opened the door slowly, his hand reaching in to catch his son's head as it slid on the seat toward the door. He put his hand on his son's head gently, as he reached across and unbuckled his belt, reaching for his waist, he felt his son's arm instinctively lift and settle on his shoulder, as he allowed his father to pull him gently from the car.

His pudgy cheek smushed into his father's shoulder, his eyes remaining closed and his breathing slow and regular as his daddy closed the door to the car and carried him toward the front door. He unlocked it carefully and stepped inside, looking around at the life he had created for himself and his boy, the life that he had created and maintained on his own, with only a little help from his family, but undeniable support, and he couldn't help but feel just a little angrier.

He carried his boy up the stairs to his bedroom, lying him in his bed, he moved for the dresser and pulled a pair of pajamas from within its drawers. He quickly and without waking the boy, changed him into his pajamas, and slipped his limp, snoring body beneath the covers. He knelt beside the bed, leaning over to kiss the cheek of his sleeping son, watching his tiny nose wiggle with a tickle of his father's 5 o'clock shadow. His blue eyes flickered open as he looked into his father's eyes. "Daddy?" he whispered, his voice filled with sleep and concern.

"Yeah, buddy?"

"Mommy isn't coming back for us." He whispered, his eyes moving to the tiny bedside table, where a small picture of a woman sat framed, a beautiful smile on her face as she held her arms around a younger version of his father. It wasn't a question, it was a statement, and Adam watched closely as his father's breath caught in his throat.

"No." Derek whispered as he shook his head and watched Adam nod his head. "No, bud… she's not." He whispered.

"It's okay, Daddy." He said, a tiny smile on his lips as the tiny dimple on his cheek made an appearance. "You have me." He said as he smiled.

"That's right." Derek nodded as he smiled a matching smile, his eyes sparkling softly as he ran his thumb across his son's forehead. "I do have you."

"Daddy?" He whispered as he gave his father a thoughtful look.

"Hmm?"

"If you tell Meredith that Emma's daddy isn't coming back for them… maybe she'll let you be Emma's daddy." He whispered as he yawned a big yawn, sucking in his breath as he closed his eyes for a moment, smacking his lips as he opened them again to look at his father's expression. "And Meredith can be my mommy." He whispered.

"You make things seem so easy." Derek whispered.

"It is easy. You just gotta do it." He said as he shrugged a little and leaned up, kissing his father on his cheek. "Go to bed… you have work in the morning." He said with a little giggle as he smiled at his father's eyes, and rolled over to face the wall as he listened to his father chuckle softly as he ruffled his hair one more time before whispering his 'goodnight' and leaving the room.

* * *

It was Friday afternoon, his last day of vacation and Derek found himself staring at the television screen in a pair of sweat pants and a t-shirt. He had been wearing the same clothes for the past two days, and was feeling more miserable with each passing moment. It had been nearly seven days since he had last seen Meredith, six since he had last heard her voice, if only for the message that she left on his machine while he was at work the day following their date, apologizing for being rude, and telling him that she just needed some time to think.

He had given her time, plenty of time, he had thought. Sunday, Monday, Tuesday. By Wednesday, he was starting to get a bit agitated. He had been spending time with Adam, which was always rewarding, and Adam appreciated the time he was getting alone with his father. They had gone to the park and played catch or gone swimming. They had taken trips to the ice cream shop near Central park and taken long walks around the city in search of a good cheeseburger, or an event that they could both enjoy. Wednesday was a regular day, though the weather was starting to turn a bit blustery. The end of the summer was coming quickly, and the rain and bad weather didn't let them forget it. He glanced at the window as he contemplated getting a beer from the refrigerator, reaching up to scratch his face, he felt the rough bristly feeling of his beard coming in.

"Damn it…" He whispered to himself as he tossed his head back, glancing to the stairs, he watched Adam shuffle toward his father, it was nearly one in the afternoon and they were both still in their pajamas. Adam's hair was messy and sticking up, his hand moving to his head as he scratched the top of it. "What have you been up to?" Derek asked as Adam's eyes met his father's and he shrugged. "You don't know, or you don't want to tell me… or what?"

"I dunno." He mumbled as he shrugged again.

"You think I should take a shower and get dressed?" Derek asked as Adam nodded, shrugging his shoulders. "You think I should… take you to Funzone Planet, don't you?" He asked as his son's head snapped in his direction, and a very familiar grin spread across the little boy's lips.

"I think you should take a shower and get dressed first, though." Adam replied with a squeal as Derek grabbed him from his spot and began to tickle him. "Oh my goodness! Daddy! You're going to make me pee! Ahh!" He squealed as Derek stopped tickling the wiggling boy and rolled him onto the couch beside him. He tried to catch his breath as he giggled a little, scratching his head again. "You know what would be a great idea?"

"What?" Derek asked as he looked to his boy, his blue eyes meeting his father's as he smiled a small smile. The mischievousness that the little boy held in those eyes was simply overwhelming, but Derek couldn't help but fall for them every time. "What would be a great idea?"

"If we invited Meredith." He said with a confident smile, watching his father's grin disappear slightly. "Meredith and Emma." Adam said with a sigh. "Daddy, it's a great idea."

"Meredith doesn't want to see me anymore, Adam. She's made it abundantly clear that she is not interested." He said as he shook his head.

"Did you ask her?" Adam asked.

"I asked her to call me back. I can't tell her anything if she doesn't call me back, and if she doesn't want to talk to me, it's not polite to pester people, Adam. Meredith is a grown up, buddy… she has grown up decisions she needs to make, and having someone tell her what to do, or being pushy or bossy… it's not going to put me any more in her favor." Derek rambled as Adam watched his father's voice grumble and his head tip back as he rubbed the bridge of her nose.

"Can I ask her?" He asked, ignoring his father's mumbling and grumbling as he nudged his leg. "Maybe she likes me more…" he shrugged. "She told me that she loves me." He said with a happy smile as Derek tilted his head in mock incredulity. "What?" He said, nudging his father's leg again. "She did." He said as he smirked at his father, giving him a mocking look that sent Derek's head shaking.

"Fine." Derek said as he sighed and looked his son in the eyes. "We can call and invite Meredith and Emma… but you have to promise me, that when they don't show up, you're paying for dinner." Derek said as he held out his hand to shake Adam's hand.

"It's a dealio!" Adam exclaimed as he swung his hand around and smacked his father's palm with his own, and ran to get the telephone.

* * *

6:48 PM-

Funzone planet was a pizzeria that was jam packed full of video games and entertainment choices for all ages of children, meaning it was also jam packed with children. The volume was loud, and the number of people was seemingly multiplying by the minutes. They had sat a good distance from the door, but still within view, and Adam had spent some time playing games, hurrying back to his table to prepare for Meredith's arrival, and the arrival of the pizza. The time was nearing the time he had told Meredith that they would be arriving at dinner, and the pizza was being brought to the table. "Pretty big pizza for just two fellas…" The waiter said with a goofy grin as he watched Derek's angry, fake smile return.

"Pretty big bowtie for a minimum wage, dead end job." Derek spat back as he watched the waiter's smile disappear, and his brow furrow in hurt. "I'm sorry." Derek mumbled as he shook his head. "I'm sorry, I'm waiting for someone, I'm just frustrated." Derek said as he watched the smile return on the waiter's face.

"Oh, it's okay, sir. I hope your night gets better." He said as he smirked at Adam, as the little boy watched his father. "Enjoy your dinner, I hope your friends show up." He said as he turned and walked quickly away from the table.

Derek glanced to Adam, whose mouth was practically watering at the sight of the pizza, he shook his head. "You better like this pizza kid… you're paying for it." He said as Adam smirked, his eyes lifting to see the door open to the restaurant. Immediately, a grin spread across his face.

"No way, Jose!" Adam exclaimed with a giggle and a laugh as he pointed at the woman walking through the door. Her hair was wet from the driving rain outside, her coat covered in raindrops as she looked around. Adam waved his arms toward her, and glanced to his father, watching as his father's look of surprise and happiness quickly turned to concern and confusion. "What's wrong, Daddy?" He asked as Adam glanced to Meredith, noticing that she was alone, and she looked almost lost, nearly frantic as she looked around for them.

"Stay here." Derek said as he watched Adam start to slide out of the booth. "Adam, I said stay here!" Derek said sternly as he watched Adam stop, his eyes on his father, understanding that he meant business. Derek pointed at the seat for emphasis, and slid from the booth and made his way quickly toward Meredith. Adam watched as Derek approached her, her eyes flashing to him and her eyes lit up slightly when she recognized him, though when he touched her arm she pulled back, her head shaking.

* * *

"Meredith… where's Emma?" Derek asked as he reached for her arm, watching her pull away as she shook her head.

"Derek… we… I… I didn't bring Emma… I didn't come here to um… oh God, this is so hard…" Meredith mumbled as she shook her head more, looking more panicked with each moment.

"Meredith, is Emma okay?" Derek asked, feeling a heavy weight in the pit of his stomach as she nodded her head. "Where is she, is she okay?" He asked as Meredith nodded her head.

"Emma is fine, Derek. She's fine." Meredith breathed, her eyes rimmed with tears as she shook her head. "She's with Cristina, I didn't… I didn't bring her because… because I thought you should know, and I didn't want to tell you on the phone."

"What?" Derek whispered, feeling the boulder in the pit of his stomach become larger, squeezing his innards angrily, twisting his stomach in such a way he didn't think possible. "Meredith… you're making me nervous."

"Derek, Emma and I are leaving New York at the end of the week." She said quickly, straight forward and emotionless, as if she were removing a bandaid from a cadaver. "We're moving back to Boston." She whispered.

* * *

Adam watched his father's body language, shifting from foot to foot as he shook his head and reached for her arm again. To him, it looked like they were talking, but from the way Derek's face had just paled, it appeared that Meredith had said something that his father didn't like. Just as quickly as Derek's face had gone pale, it began to burn with color as he shook his head, his lips saying, 'Why?' as his body language screamed 'Please, no.'

Adam took the moment as an opportunity, the pizza sitting in front of him, he reached forward and took his eyes off his father and Meredith for a moment as he pulled a large piece of thin crusted pizza onto his plate. It was warm to the touch, not too hot, and he raised his eyes with the slice to his lips, between his teeth, to see Meredith raise her hand and slap his father across the face.

Other patrons were watching now, and although they were trying to remain quiet in their discussion, it was loud enough to attract the attention of the people surrounding them, it was heated enough for them to be noticed, and Adam's ears burned with anxiety as he watched her slap his father again, dropping the slice of pizza from his lips as he whispered 'no' under his breath again and again, his voice whimpering in sadness as his hands moved to the table, his tiny fingernails scratching across the wooden table as he felt his lip trembling, his heart breaking. "No…" he whimpered again.

He needed to stop it. He needed to help. He shifted in the booth, edging toward the end as he watched Meredith take a step toward the door, her finger jabbing his father in the chest as she took another step backwards toward the door, Derek taking a step toward her, his own eyes showing the exact same rage, the exact same hurt as Meredith, as they continued their argument.

* * *

"How dare you say that to me! How dare you bring my dead husband into this conversation, bringing him up so cavalierly! How dare you desecrate his memory like that! Act like you were so much better than him, like you deserve to be the man to raise his daughter, to replace him!" She exclaimed, her voices squeaking as she tried to whisper her angry words, only to have them spat angrily in his face.

"I don't want to replace anyone! I don't want you to replace anyone! All I'm saying, Meredith… is that they're not coming back, Meredith. They're not coming back, and your little girl, she needs a…" Derek stammered, trying to appear innocent, but feeling the passion building up deep inside his body, the anger and frustration of her constantly denying him was becoming overwhelming.

"Shut up!" She exclaimed as she finally noticed the attention she was attracting. She lowered her voice and took a step toward him, poking his chest with her finger.

"Meredith, I love you." He said, hoping it may have some effect other than to enrage her more. "I love Emma, Meredith."

"We don't… we don't need you, Derek! I have…I can't… I shouldn't have agreed to that date, Derek. I wasn't ready! I wasn't ready, and you just pushed and pushed and pushed… and you saved… you saved her life, and we were just emotional, Derek. We were emotional because I almost lost her… and, it was just… you don't love us, Derek. You just think you love us, you're trying to make up for what you lost, and you've created a false idol. You've created something that isn't there."

"I am not delusional, Meredith!" Derek exclaimed, suddenly realizing that even more people were looking at them, her eyes flashing to the little boy who sit at the table, his blue eyes wide with an ungodly fear that she just had to look away.

"Derek… just… tell Adam that I… that I'm sorry." She whispered.

"You tell him!" Derek whispered angrily as he pointed his finger at his son without looking, not noticing him sliding from the booth, moving toward them slowly. "You tell them that you love something that is gone from this life more than you love him… a living, breathing, loving little boy who would walk to the ends of the earth to make his father happy, to make himself happy! He'd follow you, Meredith! He thinks you love him! You tell him that you're leaving him again. Look into his eyes and tell him that you never want to see him again."

Meredith saw the wide eyed expression of the little boy as he sit teetering on the booth seat, staring directly into her eyes as he seemingly whispered 'no' with his lips.

"I…" She whispered as she covered her face with her mouth. "I can't." She whispered. "I can't… I'm sorry." She said as she turned for the door.

"Meredith, you walk out of that door, and I never want to see you again." He whispered, angrily and hurt.

"I'm sorry…Derek." As she looked into his eyes. "But part of me died with Rick, Derek… part of me died with him, and I don't think anyone can fix it." She whispered, as she turned and pushed the door, walking back out into the rain, and out of the restaurant, and seemingly out of their lives.

Derek watched the door close behind her, the knot in his stomach squeezing angrily as he dreaded turning around to face his son. He dreaded seeing those hurt eyes, and when he started walking back to the table, he couldn't bear to look at them.

"NO!" A voice screamed, screeched angrily. "NO! MOMMY!" He exclaimed as Derek's eyes lifted to his son's as he realized that Adam was standing in front of the table.

"Adam…" Derek said as he started to walk quicker toward his son as everyone in the restaurant kept their eyes on the two of them, the noises of the restaurant quieting to just the hum and banter of the games. Not a person in the establishment was talking as suddenly, Adam balled his fists and ran as quickly as he could toward his father. Just as he was about to reach Derek, however, he turned sharply, and made a mad dash for the door. "Adam!" Derek exclaimed as in just a split second, his son was past him and out the door, into the angry early autumn rain.

* * *

_She sat in the car, having closed it from the driving rain. Her hair was soaked through, her coat hanging from her shoulders as the freezing cold water ran off it in droplets. Her tears were hot and fresh, cascading down her cheeks like thunderous waterfalls, mixing with the rain that dripped from her hair, her nose, her chin, face and clothing. She put her hands on the steering wheel of the car, leaning in on the console, she began to sob._

_Her cheeks were hot from embarrassment, and she was find it very difficult to catch her breath as the sobs began to force her into involuntary convulsive motions as she gripped the steering wheel. Her mind was reeling, the vision of his eyes still burning into her memory as she tried desperately to push the thoughts of him from her mind. She couldn't, wouldn't do this to herself. Fall in love. Fall in love again, she couldn't allow herself that luxury. She had experienced love, but she couldn't afford to lose it, and though that thought, that idea of losing love and the pain that she had thought she'd be saving herself was something that she was trying to avoid happening, she only succeeded in doing it to herself. The first, Rick she officially signed his death certificate with the slow stroke of a pen on the DNR sheet, and then just now, with that one swift turn, and the slam of a restaurant door, she had lost Derek too. Two men who would walk across the planet barefoot to follow at her side, and she had killed them both, one physically, the other emotionally._

_Dead._

_She sobbed uncontrollably into her arms, completely unknowing of the chase that was ensuing in the pouring rain outside her car._

* * *

Derek's feet slammed into the floor hard, a bag in one hand and his son tucked neatly beneath his other arm as he raced across the linoleum floor.

"We're going to miss it!" Adam squealed loudly as Derek bounced him a little in his arm, listening to the little boy laugh. "Daddy! We're going to miss it!"

"We're not going to miss it!" Derek grunted as he turned a corner and started to sprint down the hallway, dodging people and baggage, two skycaps and a man carrying a garbage tote. "We are NOT going to miss it!" he exclaimed as he watched the number for their gate blink on and off as the final boarding call was given. He ran faster, his heart pounding out of his chest.

"We're going to miss it!" Adam squealed as several travelers laughed at the pair as the little boy hung upside down under his father's arm shouting and laughing as the older man puffed and wheezed as he approached the gate. He swung around the corner, his son nearly slipping from his arms.

He set Adam to the floor and pulled the boarding passes from his pocket, practically shoving them into the airline employee's hand. "We made it." He puffed as he wiped the sweat from his forehead and took slow, deep breaths. "We made it…" He said as he watched the employee scan the tickets. He handed them back and smiled at the father and son as Adam pulled his backpack onto his back a little tighter.

"Merry Christmas, sir." The employee said as he smiled, watching as Derek and Adam pushed through to the tunnel to the plane.

"Merry Christmas to you too!" Adam exclaimed over his shoulder, as his father pulled him toward the plane.

They stepped into the cabin of the plane, and collapsed into a heap onto the first row of first class seats, avoiding eye contact with the other holiday travelers, just in case they were upset that the flight had been held up specifically for them. Derek pushed his bag into the overhead compartment quickly, falling back into his seat beside his son as he glanced to the little boy, who was rooting through his backpack. "You couldn't wait five minutes before you opened things up?"

"I'm making sure you didn't crush anything." Adam said with a slight smile to his father beside him. "I don't know what the big hurry was." He shrugged. "We got here on time." He giggled into his bag, as he listened to his father's faux frustrated sigh beside him, watching the little boy's feet swing back and forth as he shook his head.

* * *

_"ADAM! Get back here!" Derek exclaimed as soon as he stepped out into the parking lot, his son's tiny form was nowhere in sight, and the rushing of cars down the busy road beside the restaurant made him shudder. "Adam! Where are you!"_

_"MEREDITH!" Adam's voice screamed from the parking lot, the loud pounding of the rain on the cars around him, the lightning and rumble of thunder above made him jump. "Meredith! Come back!" he screamed, pounding on cars in the parking lot, not knowing which contained the woman that he refused to see disappear. "Meredith, Come back! Don't leave us! Meredith! Meredith!" He screamed, hearing his father's voice shout his name as he continued to walk between the cars, pounding on the sides as he peered in each of the windows. "Meredith… he mumbled as he choked on his sob, his tears mixing with the rain as his sneakers splashed in the puddles in the parking lot. "Meredith… Please…" He sniffed as he looked into another car._

_"Adam! Where are you?" Derek shouted as he started to walk between the cars in the parking lot, filled to the brim with minivans and SUVs, it was virtually impossible to see around all of them, and he had no idea which way that Adam went. "Adam! Get back here right now!" Derek exclaimed as his fear and anxiety slowly turned to anger, misplaced and frightened anger, but anger nonetheless. "Adam!" He screamed as the rain pounded angrily and fiercely, the harsh wind sending waves of water into his eyes and face as he stalked around the dark parking lot. "Adam!" He shouted again._

_Her sobs turned into hiccups as she gripped the steering wheel tightly, as if it were the only thing that was keeping her from breaking apart, as if it were actually what was keeping her heart beating in her chest, as if the idea of her letting go of that steering wheel, was officially letting go of the possibility of happiness. Happiness that she felt would inevitably lead to heart break._

_She had no strength to pull the keys from her purse, no willpower to actually leave the parking area of the building she had fled, preferring instead to bury her face in her hands and listen to the pounding rain around her for just a few more minutes as she sobbed in the knowledge of the pain she had caused herself and someone she had tried desperately to admit that she didn't love._

_The only thing that could rouse her from her self imposed misery was the far off cry of a man desperate to find his little boy among the throngs of cars that filled the dim parking lot of the restaurant, as the rain rapped angrily against her car windows._

* * *

"Tap, tap… tap tap… tap tap…" Adam's voice rattled amusedly at his father's shoulder as he watched Derek look over at his son.

"It doesn't work when you actually 'say' tap, Adam…" Derek said out of the corner of his eye as he put his book down and glanced to the little boy and his Cheshire grin. "What's up?"

"When are we going to be there?" He asked as he tipped his head slightly, leaning forward just a little as he kept his hand on the window beside him, his eyes on his father's as he watched them smile with him.

"It's not a long flight…" Derek replied.

"Not like Seattle." Adam said as he glanced out the window and then back to his father.

"No, not like Seattle." Derek replied, suddenly remembering that the last flight that they had taken together was when they had moved back to New York from Seattle. The long flight was exhausting, and the destination was familiar, but still very uncertain, and at the time his belly was filled with such anxiety that he had nearly become sick. "Definitely shorter than that." Derek replied.

"I'm excited." He said as he sat back and looked straight ahead, his eyes glancing out the window as the plane flew through the clouds, making a view virtually impossible in the December gloom that surrounded them. "I'm very excited." He said, grinning back at his father as Derek shook his head.

"You don't look excited…" He said as he watched Adam bounce a little in his seat.

"I'm excited, I'm excited!" He squeaked as he giggled.

"Why don't you pull out your construction paper and crayons… make us a sign… and that way, when we get there, they'll be able to find us." Derek said as he watched Adam reach for his bag eagerly, pulling it up onto his lap, he pulled a pad of brightly colored papers from within it, his other hand reaching in for his crayons, as the bag slipped off his lap onto the floor.

"Oops…" Adam said with a giggle as he held tightly to his paper and crayons as Derek shook his head, lifting the boy's backpack onto the seat.

"I don't know what I'm going to do with you." Derek said with a chuckle.

* * *

_"Adam!" Derek exclaimed as he felt panic beginning to rise up in his chest, his eyes scanning quickly over the parking lot as he slammed his foot into a deep puddle, sending a splash of water up his leg. He stared down at the mud and water on his leg and swore under his breath with the realization that it really didn't matter, nothing mattered but Adam. "Adam… please!" Derek exclaimed as he spotted the little boy's yellow and blue shirt as it disappeared behind an SUV. "Adam! Stop!" Derek exclaimed as he ran toward the fleeing boy once again. "Adam, she's not here!" He exclaimed as he ran quickly, not noticing several cars pulling into the parking lot, their lights bright and blinding as they rolled unknowingly down the aisles of cars._

_Tiny hands slammed against yet another window as he noticed his father's voice becoming louder, nearer. He breathed heavily as he slipped between another two cars and suddenly tripped over his feet, sending him tumbling. He looked up to see two bright lights coming in his direction, slowing not a bit as he opened his mouth to scream._

* * *

Hands gripped the seat tightly as the wheels of the plane hit the tarmac, and the two blue eyes of the little boy were looking out the window, aimed directly at the waiting terminals in front of them.

"Are they going to be there waiting for us?" He asked excitedly as he swung his feet and grinned at his father, his eyes sparkling happily as he held his green sheet of construction paper in his hands.

"I hope so." Derek said as he smiled at his son, running his hand over the boy's hair, newly cut and combed, his father rustled it just a bit. "They're our ride."

"Don't mess with the hair, Daddy… it has to be just right…"

"What? You have a hot Christmas date?" He asked as Adam made a grossed out face.

"Get real…" He said with a laugh as Derek shook his head and pulled out his cell phone. "Can I talk?" He asked as he held his hand out to his father, watching Derek give him a shake of his head as he wiggled his fingers.

"You'll see her in a minute…" Derek said as he shook his head, listening for someone to pick up. "Besides, she's not answering her phone anyway." Derek said as Adam shook his head.

"Women." He said as he sighed heavily, eliciting a sideways glance from his father as he reached forward for his bag.

"Wait… wait…" Derek said as he watched Adam reach for his seatbelt to pull it from his lap. "Just wait for the plane to park, okay? I don't need anyone getting a concussion or anything." Derek said as Adam rolled his eyes and sat back in his seat, watching his father nervously dial the phone again.

* * *

_The lights disappeared in a flash, as Adam felt his body yanked back violently by his shirt, his body lifted from the ground. "OW! LET GO OF ME!" Adam screamed as he struggled against the hands that gripped him tightly, turning him quickly, his body soaking and trembling as two arms surrounded his body._

_"Adam…" Derek whispered as he felt his son suddenly start to struggle, and as the car drove on past them, the reality of the situation slammed head on into Derek as if it had been the car that had just passed them. He just about dropped his son to the ground, grabbing him by the shoulder. "Jesus fucking CHRIST! ADAM! What were you thinking!" He screamed as he held his son by his shoulders, his thumbs pushing into the boy's arm as Adam stared at his father in shock. "You could have gotten yourself KILLED! You could have been killed! What were you thinking! How…. What… Mother fucking goddamned jesus fucking Christ!" Derek screamed as he stood up, slamming his foot into the pavement as wave after wave of realization came over his mind, his heart pounding violently in his chest, having just ripped his son from certain death as he stand before his father soaked to the bone, his eyes red rimmed and scared as his father stand above him swearing. "WHAT WERE YOU THINKING?" Derek exclaimed suddenly as he grabbed his shoulders. "WHAT WERE YOU THINKING!" He shouted again, unable to grasp his emotions, when suddenly, the little boy was grabbed from behind by someone else, and a hand reached out and pushed Derek's shoulder._

_"Oh my God, Adam!" The voice exclaimed as she held the petrified boy in her arms, realizing who it was, his arms went around her instantly. "What on earth are you doing to the poor thing!" Meredith exclaimed. "Derek, look at me! Look at me!" She exclaimed as her own red rimmed eyes tried to look into his, his mind still reeling from the situation that had just occurred, from the accident that had almost happened._

_"Meredith!" Adam exclaimed. "Meredith! Please don't leave! Please don't leave!" he exclaimed as Derek stood dumbfounded staring at Meredith, standing before him holding his son as he screamed and sobbed into her, their eyes clashing in a battle of unbridled anger and passion. The little boy's cries were drown by the rain, but Meredith heard each one as they entered her ear violently, her arms holding the boy to her body as he trembled._

_"What the hell were you doing to him, Derek!" She screamed as she pushed him again, watching the clouds in his eyes clear slowly. "What the hell were you doing to him?"_

_"I was saving his life!" Derek exclaimed angrily as he walked closer to her, reaching for his son._

_"Saving his life? Saving his life by yelling swears at him? By bruising him and manhandling him? Poor baby…poor baby…" Meredith said as she tried to soothe the boys tears._

_"MANHANDLING HIM? MAN HANDLING HIM? Give me my son!" Derek exclaimed as he reached for the boy._

_"No!" Meredith exclaimed, the rain pouring around them, soaking them all as her eyes showed a deep passion as she held the boy, her love for him shining through as she let the water soak her, trying to shield the poor boy from the onslaught of the early fall rain. "You were grabbing him! Hurting him!"_

_"He ran out in front of a car, Meredith! He wouldn't even have been out here if it weren't for you! If it weren't for you and your cold, angry, hateful…"_

_Suddenly, Meredith reached out and grabbed Derek's shirt, her cold hand gripping his sweater in her grasp as she pulled him close. "Watch your mouth." She growled in his face, pushing him backwards slightly as she held the boy in her arms tighter._

_"Why? Why? Are you going to slap me? Are you going to slap me again? Slap me again, I dare you!" Derek exclaimed. "Slap me!" He exclaimed. "Do it again! Slap me in front of my son again! I don't think twice was enough!" He exclaimed as he reached for the boy as Adam gripped Meredith tighter. "Hand him over to me!"_

_"No! he doesn't want to go with you! You're scaring him!" Meredith exclaimed._

_"Me? I'm scaring HIM? I AM SCARING HIM! HE ALMOST GOT HIMSELF KILLED JUST NOW!" Derek exclaimed as his eyes moved to the front door of the restaurant, wishing that they could have just sat down and had a nice dinner together, knowing that wish was washed down the gutters with the rain. "He could have been killed, and it would have been your fault! Give me my son back! Give him back to me, or are you going to take him too? You already ripped my heart out tonight, are you going to try to rip my fucking soul out too?" he exclaimed angrily as he took a step forward._

_"Stop being dramatic! Stop being dramatic!" She exclaimed as she took a step backwards, her foot landing in a puddle as the little boy continued to grip her tightly, crying his heart out as they both trembled, he from the cold, and she from her own emotional struggle._

_"Dramatic? MY KID RAN OUT IN FRONT OF A FUCKING CAR!" Derek exclaimed. "TO FIND YOU! WHAT DO YOU HAVE TO FUCKING SAY FOR YOURSELF?" he shouted angrily as he reached for his son once again, happy when Meredith finally handed him over, and though he fought to hold her, the little boy's hands were far too cold to keep a grip, and he was pulled into his father's arms._

* * *

Derek held Adam securely in his arms, moving through the airport quickly as he could, his bag in his other hand as Adam hold his sign. "Daddy, I'm a big boy, you know… I can walk…"

"Big boy or not, you have short dinosaur legs, and you're slow." Derek teased as Adam's jaw dropped.

"I don't have dinosaur legs!" he exclaimed.

"You sure do… good for stomping, bad for walking quickly…" Derek teased as he bounced his son, listening to him giggle.

"Did she ever answer the phone?" Adam asked as Derek's eyebrows shot up and he shook his head.

"We'll try again when we get to baggage claim…" Derek replied. "They may just be at the front of the airport to pick us up…"

"Maybe she doesn't like us anymore…" Adam teased his father as Derek shook his head. "Maybe they deserted us!" he exclaimed.

"That's not even a possibility." He said as he shook his head and bounced his son as they made their way toward baggage claim.

They stepped up to the baggage carousel, and stared at the belt as it went around in a circle. Derek looked around at all of the different travelers, some families hugging and greeting one another. He sighed softly as he carefully lowered his son to the floor, grabbing his hand before he had a chance to disappear.

He pulled his cell phone from his pocket and dialed her phone again, waiting patiently for her to answer. He sighed when it went to voice mail and looked down at his son. "We're dessert." Adam said with a smirk as Derek shook his head.

"We are not dessert…" he said as he gave Adam an incredulous look.

"Try again." He said as he smirked up at his father, pulling his winter hat from his pocket, the string for the ear flap was looped in his hand and he twirled it around and around. "There's some bags…" Adam said as some of the bags started going around the carousel.

Derek rolled his eyes and turned from the carousel, his attention back on his phone when it rang one, two, three times, and on the third ring someone answered. "Hey!" Derek said as he smiled, looking down at Adam, whose eyes sparkled up at him as he shook his head and giggled. "It's about time. I was starting to feel like a lemon meringue pie." Derek said with a laugh. He laughed at the person's response and shook his head, laughing again. "Adam says you deserted us." Derek looked down at his son, who looked up at his father. "She didn't desert us…" Derek said as Adam giggled. "Where are you?" He asked as suddenly, Adam grabbed his father's arm.

"Daddy!" he exclaimed excitedly.

Derek missed what the person on the line said, and he glared down at Adam, who was looking at the baggage carousel. "What was that?"

"Daddy! Daddy!" he exclaimed. "Daddy, look!" Adam exclaimed as he pulled Derek's arm, and attention to the baggage carousel, and what he saw there, made him laugh out loud.

"Oh my…" Derek started to say as he laughed into the phone line.

* * *

_"God, Meredith! Must you be so goddamned difficult?" Derek exclaimed as he shook his head angrily, their argument was still out in the rain, though the screaming had tapered down to frustrated grunts and ramblings between the two of them, as Adam stand beside them. "This is not the way this should have ended up… this is not how things should be left, and you just… you should be ashamed of yourself to think that I was going to react as anything less than livid about your decision. You have a daughter that you need to think of, you have… you have a job…"_

_"I can get a job in Boston, Derek… my mother is chief of…"_

_"Yeah, I know what your mother does for a living, and I'm sure that you'll have a great time trying to prove yourself in her shadow! You had a real opportunity here, Meredith! You had the opportunity to be a member of one of the most prestigious internships in the country, and you're going to turn it down because I took you out on a date! That's STUPID, Meredith… it's stupid and careless!" he exclaimed as she took a step back, the anger in her face was unmistakable as their argument continued to be heated as they shouted at one another back and forth for several minutes._

_"And what about Emma, huh? What about Emma? She is supposed to be starting school this month, and you're just going to drag her to ANOTHER area? I came here and live in this neighborhood because my son's school has an exemplary record, and the children that go there are gifted, talented, and…" Derek said as he reached for his son, noticing that he was no longer standing beside them. Somewhere in mid argument, he had disappeared, and a look of panic spread over Derek's face. "Oh God… where is…"_

_Suddenly, from somewhere in the parking lot, the sound of a horn sounded. It was loud and insistent, obnoxious and angry. "Shit!" Derek exclaimed as he ran toward the sound. He reached for his pocket to realize that his keys were no longer inside, he huffed and puffed as he felt his feet slapping the wet ground as he rounded the corner toward his car, noticing the little boy soaked and insistent, sitting in the driver's seat, his entire body pressed against the horn as his father came running toward the car. Derek swung open the door and watched Adam sit up, his eyes shooting toward his father as the mud from his shoes and the water from his body dripped all over his father's car. "Adam! What the hell are you doing?" Derek exclaimed as Meredith swung open the passenger side door, peering in on the boy as she and Derek locked glares across the car._

_"STOP! YELLING!" He exclaimed, for each word, he slammed down on the horn as Derek reached in the car._

_"Back seat!" Derek exclaimed as he watched Adam turn and leap head first into the back seat. Derek's eyes moved to Meredith as she stared into the car at him. "Are you getting in the goddamned car, or are you going to stand out in the rain and catch pneumonia again?" Derek asked. "God knows I don't need you getting sick again… you look like shit when you get sick." Derek grumbled as he watched her stare back at him. "Meredith." Derek said again as he watched the tears in her eyes as she looked as if she contemplated running._

_Derek opened his mouth to say something, and she suddenly just climbed into the car and slammed it behind her, as Adam crouched on the middle console, his head between the two of them as Derek climbed inside and began to immediately shout._

_He was angry, frustrated, disappointed, sad, and he had absolutely no idea how to explain to Meredith how bitter he was feeling toward her, how angry her words had made him feel, how mortified he had been when she slapped him in front of all of those people._

_Derek began to shout, explain, babble, diatribe and scream about the entire situation, from the end of their date, to that very moment as they sit in the car together, water dripping off them, their clothes soaked and ruined from the rain. "Explain yourself." Derek finally said as he finally shut up, staring at her angrily as he contemplated just asking her to leave._

_"I…"_

_"I have been nothing but kind to you, Meredith. I asked you out on that date because you needed it. You didn't know it then, and you probably don't realize now… but you needed it. You have to get on with your life, Meredith. Your husband would want you to… and I'm not saying…" Derek said, catching her ready to interrupt. "I'm not saying… you have to get on with your life and replace your husband and find a new father for your daughter… Meredith. What I'm saying is… You… deserve… better, Meredith. Emma deserves better. You have earned someone to take care of you, to love you, to dote on you and buy you ice cream and flowers and treat you like a princess… you deserve that, and if you're too stubborn to realize it… then you need to… just…"_

_"Stop!" Meredith exclaimed. "Stop it!"_

_"Stop what? Stop sticking up for myself? Stop being myself? Stop refusing to hold back? I love you, Meredith Grey! I love you!"_

_"Derek, stop it!" She exclaimed. "Just stop it! I can't love you, Derek! I can't!"_

_"I know you can't… but do you? Do you love me, Meredith? Why are you doing this? If you … feel nothing, why are you here? Why are you in my car right now? Why did you confront me outside, because I know it wasn't because I was shouting at my son. Why did you do it? Do you love him? Is that why you did it? Did you want to protect him from me? What is your problem, Meredith? Why are you here? Why are you here! WHY ARE YOU HERE! Why do you continue to just torture me!" He exclaimed as suddenly Meredith grabbed hold of him angrily and swung her face toward him as she came nose to nose with him._

_"BECAUSE I LOVE YOU, GODDAMN IT! YOU HAVE BEEN THE FIRST THING I HAVE THOUGHT OF WHEN I WAKE UP AND THE LAST THING I THINK OF WHEN I GO TO BED SINCE THE MOMENT I LAID EYES ON YOU, DEREK SHEPHERD! I LOVE YOU! I LOVE YOU MORE THAN I HAVE EVER LOVED ANYONE, AND IF I LOSE YOU LIKE I LOST RICK, THEN I WILL DIE!" She screamed as she found herself staring straight into his eyes, the fire and passion that was hidden behind those eyes was unmistakable. "I'll die, Derek…" She whimpered. "I love you." She whispered. "I love you."_

_The car fell silent as tears rolled down her cheeks, her eyes staring directly into Derek's as his jaw set, and his eyes sit unwavering on her features. The rain pounded violently on the car as a roll of thunder was heard in the distance, the rain picking up even more as not a word, a motion, a breath was exchanged between any of the three people in the car._

_Eventually, the silence became too much for at least one occupant. "Aren't you gonna say you love her too, Daddy?" Adam whispered._

_"No." Derek whispered in return, his eyes never leaving Meredith's, not for a second._

* * *

The grin that appeared on Derek's face when his eyes graced what his son was pointing at, would have held enough energy to have powered the city for eternity as he listened to the tender giggle over the line. "What are you giggling at?" He asked into the phone as he watched his bag in the carousel moving slowly in his direction.

"Nothing." She giggled again as she waited to hear his reaction.

There was a pause as Derek reached forward and lifted the woman's winter boot from atop his suitcase, along with the tiny pink winter boot that accompanied it. He lifted the bag from the belt and looked around the crowded room, trying to spot her. "Isn't your foot cold?" He asked as he listened to her giggle.

"No…" She giggled again as he looked around quickly, watching Adam look around too, when suddenly the little boy's eyes lit up like a Christmas tree.

"MEREDITH!" He exclaimed as he suddenly broke free from his father's side and ran as fast as he could in the direction of the blonde woman holding a phone to her ear, standing several feet away beside a bench, one boot on, and the other mysteriously missing. The little girl at his side, dressed for the winter weather grinned brightly as she ran toward him, her arms outstretched as she shuffled along, one boot missing as she catapulted herself into Derek's arms.

"DEREK!" Emma squealed with all of her might as Derek literally caught her mid leap, pulling her into his arms as she squeezed him tightly around the neck, kissing his cheek again and again. "I missed you! I missed you! I missed you! I missed YOU!" She exclaimed as he kissed her back, giving her hugs as he held her close, slipping her tiny pink boot onto her foot as he watched Meredith hug his son from where she was standing.

"My goodness, you've been away for three days… you act like you haven't seen me in years…" Derek teased as the little girl clung to him tightly as Derek slowly made his way toward Meredith, a smile on his face as she stepped forward as she held the little boy, meeting in the middle, their lips immediately found one another.

"EW!" Adam and Emma exclaimed in unison, as the separated lovers embraced with the two children in their arms, complete with loud fake squishing complaints from the two kids, as Derek kissed Meredith's cheek again and again, breathing in the tender scent of her hair, skin, reveling in the sparkle in her eyes as he smiled.

* * *

_"No?" Meredith's voice was able to squeak as she tried to catch her breath, Derek's word seemed harsh, cold, and she immediately regretted her outburst._

_"Why?" Adam asked as he watched Derek and Meredith continue to stare at one another. Derek watched the hurt in her eyes as she tried to internally cover the soul that she had bared, finding the covers too thin and worn to even begin to cover the pain, the love, the admiration._

_"Because she doesn't care." Derek replied, his voice was despondent and distant, it was angry. "She doesn't care."_

_"She said she loves you!" Adam insisted._

_"She said she loves me, but she's still leaving." Derek said, his eyes torn from hers, taking with it the cover of her soul. "She's still leaving, Adam."_

_"No!" Adam exclaimed, sitting up. "No she's not! She said she loves you!"_

_"She doesn't love me, Adam!" Derek exclaimed angrily, knowing that Meredith was hurting with each refusal to recognize her words. "She doesn't love me, if she loved me, she wouldn't leave us. She wouldn't leave you."_

_"She loves me! She loves me! She does, daddy! She loves you and she loves me! She's not leaving, she's not leaving… Meredith, tell him you're not leaving! Tell him!" he exclaimed as he pulled on her arm. "Tell him, Meredith! Tell him!" He shouted._

_"Stop it, Adam! Stop it, leave her alone! Let her go!" Derek exclaimed, his eyes darting to hers as she continued to stare into his eyes, the pain so evident, that it was starting to hurt himself. "She's going to go… she has to go." He said angrily._

_"Tell Daddy, Meredith! Tell him you're going to stay… tell him that you love me." Adam whimpered. "Tell him… tell him that you want to be my mommy…" He said, the last two words whispered across the car as Meredith's eyes flashed to the little boy, his soul was bared to her as well, as his eyes sparkled with understanding, his heart was in his hands and he was begging for her to not reach across and grip it angrily in her hand._

_"I…" Meredith said as she stared into his eyes, her head tilting as she watched those blue eyes that matched his father's, the lips that trembled as he spoke, trembled from the rain, the pouring rain that he had ran out into in pursuit of her, rain that he had risked his life to run through, whether he realized it or not, and whether or not he realized it, Derek did. As did Meredith. "Adam…" She whimpered._

_"Meredith." Adam whimpered, his lip trembling as he waited for her response. "Do you love me too?" He whispered._

* * *

Their eyes were meeting as each held on to a child, shimmying their way down their hip to the floor where they sat down beside one another in one of the waiting chairs. They could see the look in their parent's eyes that they needed a moment to reacquaint with one another. "You look good." Derek whispered as he tilted his head, the smile on his lips was almost awkward as he watched her nose wrinkle as she smiled.

"Can I have my boot back?" She asked as she nodded toward the boot sitting on the suitcase beside him, his eyes moving to it as he grabbed it in his hand.

"This is my boot." He teased as he watched her jaw drop slightly.

"You better give that back to me, Derek…" She shook her head as he laughed, watching her balance on one foot slightly as she almost lost her footing.

"I don't know what you're talking about." He said as he caught her, his arms around her instantly as he bent her backwards slightly.

"What are you doing?" She asked as he dipped her and gave her a smile as he watched her tip her head back, lifting her up into his arms again, he dropped a kiss on her lips.

"Making you forget what you wanted…" He said with a laugh as she giggled, reaching for her boot as Derek laughed.

"Boot!" She exclaimed as she growled playfully at him, swatting his arm as he finally relented, handing the boot over to her as she dropped it on the floor, slipping her foot into it with a grin. "Perfect fit." She said with as smile as Derek chuckled.

"So… you get an extra two days off… slacker intern… you leave me for three days, and you don't even bring me my Christmas gifts?" He asked as she laughed.

"They're at mom's… I told you I was bringing them to mom's… she's looking forward to seeing you." Meredith said with a smile, glancing to the two kids as they appeared bored, staring up at their parents with rolled eyes and smirks. "We should go before they start revolting." Meredith said with a laugh. How was your flight?"

"It was lonely without you." Derek said with a smile as he watched her smile and shake her head at him.

"Look on the bright side." Meredith said sweetly as she nudged him lightly with her elbow. "At least I'll be on the plane home with you." She said as Derek grinned, nudging her back as he reached for his bag.

"Very true." Derek said with a smile. "Oh! Gifts…" he said as he reached into his carry on bag and pulled two packages out quickly.

"Gifts?" Meredith asked. "Can't they wait until…"

"No, you have to open them in the airport." He said with a mischievous grin.

"Derek…" Meredith said with a laugh as Derek shook his head.

"No…Christmas rules… don't make me grab that tree over there and put your boot on it." He said with a laugh as the kids giggled. Derek handed Emma a box, and Meredith a smaller box, and he sat beside his son and pulled him into his lap as Meredith took his seat.

Emma immediately began ripping her package open, a gasp coming to her lips when she saw the red slippers sitting within the tissue in the box. "Oh my…. Oh my…. Oh my God! I love them, Derek!" She exclaimed with a squeal as she leapt from her seat and ran around to Derek, hugging him tightly as she kissed his cheek. "I love them so much…" She said with a kiss. "You're the best daddy a girl could ask for…" She said with a giggle as she kissed him again, missing the slight sad look on her mother's face as it passed quickly, her eyes on the package in her own hands.

"What's in it?" She asked Derek as she watched him smirk and shake his head as he held the little girl on his lap, her fingers moving over the gentle fabric of the red slippers as she smiled happily.

"Open it." Derek said with a slight laugh as he watched her fumble with the wrapping, her eyes bright and happy as she looked up at Derek and back down at the box, pulling the wrapping from around the box, she grinned so brightly, Derek waited patiently, and was eventually rewarded with a tender giggle.

"A slinky?" She said with a laugh. "You got me a slinky for Christmas again?" She asked with a laugh as he watched her eyes sparkle in appreciation.

"Well, I heard the last one was misplaced… or lost… or something… I thought you could use a replacement." He teased as she laughed. "Why don't you take it out… we'll take it for a spin." He said with a laugh as she watched him smile tenderly.

"We can wait until we get home… it's okay." She said as she pulled it out of his reach as he went to grab it.

"Tradition… here… give it to me…" He said as he laughed as she turned from him, her back to him and the children, as she opened the box. It was this time that he was absolutely certain that he had heard a gasp, the exact reaction that he had intended on creating. He waited patiently as she slowly turned around, the slinky box open, her hand wrapped around not the toy, but a small black box that had been carefully slipped into the middle of the toy. Her eyes lifted to Derek's, a slight tear forming in the corner.

"Derek." She choked out as Emma's mouth widened in surprise, as did Adam.

"Holy crap, Dad!" Adam exclaimed, seeing the ring box in Meredith's hand as it trembled violently.

"Meredith?" Derek whispered as he very carefully placed Emma on his seat, turning to kneel before her, he stared at her dumbfounded expression as her mouth opened and closed, and her mouth went dry, her voice absolutely missing. He slipped the box from her nimble fingertips, the felt in his hand felt warm as he carefully opened the box.

"Derek." She managed to squeak as she tried to find her words as she stared into the box, a diamond ring winking at her from within its confines.

"Meredith Grey?" he whispered, suddenly aware of the attention that his gesture had attracted. "Meredith… will you do the honor of becoming my wife?" He whispered. "Do you… will you… um… will you marry me?" He whispered as he watched her eyes water with surprise, happiness, and so many emotions that he had yet to discover. Her eyes were like looking into the eye of a kaleidoscope, the color changing with each passing emotion, and he couldn't imagine anything more beautiful. "Meredith?" He whispered.

* * *

_"Meredith!" Adam exclaimed as he grabbed her hand. "Tell him you love me and you're going to stay. "Tell him." He whispered. "Tell him that Emma's daddy is dead, Meredith… that he's dead and that we're alive, and we're alive and we need you! Tell him! Tell him that you love us, Meredith! Tell him yes! Tell him that I love you, and you love us back. Tell him, Meredith… Do you love me?" He whispered._

_"Yes." She whispered to the little boy, her eyes sincere and full of tears. "Yes, of course I love you." She exclaimed as a grin covered her face, and her mind was reminding her to breath as she leapt at the man, her arms encircling his neck as she began to cry._

* * *

"Meredith?" He whispered softly, every eye in the airport was focused on her as her eyes focused on his. "I love you." He whispered as he smiled, sending a arrow straight through her heart and nestling it within her soul.

"I love you." She managed to whimper.

"Is that a yes?" Adam exclaimed as he leapt from his seat, Emma following suit.

"Of course it's a yes." Meredith finally whimpered. "Of course it's a yes!" She said as instantly she was gathered up into Derek's arms, her daughter, his son and she, as the family finally made it home for Christmas.

* * *

_**The end.**_


End file.
